My DD is eight years old. She was homeschooled since K. Recently she was admitted to a local prestigious gifted private school with scholarship which covers half of the tuition. The school is very strong in STEM. The school requires a minimum of certain IQ scores, tests, shadow day and interviews for admission. My DD met all of the admission requirements. We are debating whether to accept the offer. Pros: The school is very strong in STEM and offers a lot of STEM related clubs like math club and robotics club. Students from this school rank high in Science Olympiad. The school has four labs and provides a lot of hands on activities. For math and ELA, the students are placed in different grades based on their skills, not on their ages. The school claims they are very good at supporting gifted student academically and emotionally. DD is likely to find likely mind peers at school. My DD does not have any friend except my DS. She does not share common interest with other peers in our neighborhood. Cons: 1) We still have to pay $20,000 a year. 2) One way commute is 30 minutes. I have to drive four times to drop off and pick up her. My DS goes to another school which is in the opposite direction. I would not be able to spend more time to help my DS who has ASD and ADHD. 3) We are not very into the ELA and Social Science curriculum of the school. We use classical approach to educate my DD. The school does not offer any narration, copy, dictation, recitation etc. Classical literature is not included in the ELA. World history is also excluded from K-8. We are afraid if DD goes to this school, she will not learn as much as she learned from home. 4) If my DD goes to the school, She will have less time for her extra activities. I have to cut her sports and art time since her school is far away from home. We are debating whether to take the offer. Right now she is very strong in Math, ELA and History. She is taking math class from AOPS. For ELA and History, I use the curriculum recommended by WTM. What we are lacking is peer interaction, science labs, science hands on activities and opportunities to compete in Science Olympiad. Any suggestions are welcomed. Thanks. Let me update some information: 1) We live in one of the biggest metropolitan area in the middle west. We have several top museums in the U.S. They do have some camps in winter and summer. We live in Suburbs. The commute for two way is 2-3 hours either by metra train or driving in the rush hours. 2) We live in the neighborhood where the housing price is cheaper than that of neighborhood with cut-throat public schools. But our neighborhood has none of excellent private EC programs. I have to drive one way 30-40 minutes for DD's drawing class and Robotics program. 3) There are a couple of Co-ops in my area. But I have not found any one to fit DD, especially one with a lot of gifted kids. I just feel homeschooling is not very popular in this metropolitan area. The people I know who value education either buy expensive house in cut-throat public schools or send kids to prestigious private schools. 4) DD had a shadow day at the gifted school. She told me she liked it. The best part is the science class. It is better than her public school's. ( She is homeschooled. But I send her back to public school for one semester). She felt the private school's ELS is not impressive and 3rd home room math is not challenging. ( The school differentiates the students. Some 3rd grader stay in the home room for 3rd math, some go to higher grades) 5) DD is not diagnosed with ASD. My DS has ASD. We took her to have a complete neuropsychological evaluation last year. She does have some traits shared with her brother. She does not have any friend except her brother. She is very engaged and enthusiastic sharing her ideas and interests in the EC classes. Her interests are so broad. But after class, she does not want to play or talk with any peers. She told me she is not interested in their topics. She is not good at small talk even though she could work with peers appropriately in a team project and talk about the project with them. The psychologist didn't give ASD diagnosis because she does not meet criterias. DD is a perfectionist and sometimes her emotions are intense.The psychologist suspected her having pragmatic language delay. So, I took her to evaluate by SLP specifically for her pragmatic language. But her score is 98 percentile. SLP told me it maybe her anxiety or personal preference not to have small talk with peers. 6) We talk with DD about the school choice. She told us she was not sure whether she wanted to go. She told me she saw Athena's online class. She wants to register for Anatomy, The Story of the Science and Biology 101 for middle school. If she goes to private school, she could not attend the class. But she likes the science class in the private school.

Thanks all for your input. DD is not diagnosed because she does not meet the criteria. The testing psychologist did tell me DD may meet the criteria in the future. LoL. She is so different from other typical girls. I just feel she is an Asperger. I am debating whether to send her to gifted school to be with peers or homeschool with supplement academically and socially.

Thank you everyone for your valuable input! I have read every thread which gave me tremendous valuable information. Let me update some information: 1) We live in one of the biggest metropolitan area in the middle west. We have several top museums in the U.S. They do have some camps in winter and summer. We live in Suburbs. The commute for two way is 2-3 hours either by metra train or driving in the rush hours. 2) We live in the neighborhood where the housing price is cheaper than that of neighborhood with cut-throat public schools. But our neighborhood has none of excellent private EC programs. I have to drive one way 30-40 minutes for DD's drawing class and Robotics program. 3) There are a couple of Co-ops in my area. But I have not found any one to fit DD, especially one with a lot of gifted kids. I just feel homeschooling is not very popular in this metropolitan area. The people I know who value education either buy expensive house in cut-throat public schools or send kids to prestigious private schools. 4) DD had a shadow day at the gifted school. She told me she liked it. The best part is the science class. It is better than her public school's. ( She is homeschooled. But I send her back to public school for one semester). She felt the private school's ELS is not impressive and 3rd home room math is not challenging. ( The school differentiates the students. Some 3rd grader stay in the home room for 3rd math, some go to higher grades) 5) DD is not diagnosed with ASD. My DS has ASD. We took her to have a complete neuropsychological evaluation last year. She does have some traits shared with her brother. She does not have any friend except her brother. She is very engaged and enthusiastic sharing her ideas and interests in the EC classes. Her interests are so broad. But after class, she does not want to play or talk with any peers. She told me she is not interested in their topics. She is not good at small talk even though she could work with peers appropriately in a team project and talk about the project with them. The psychologist didn't give ASD diagnosis because she does not meet criterias. DD is a perfectionist and sometimes her emotions are intense.The psychologist suspected her having pragmatic language delay. So, I took her to evaluate by SLP specifically for her pragmatic language. But her score is 98 percentile. SLP told me it maybe her anxiety or personal preference not to have small talk with peers. 6) We talk with DD about the school choice. She told us she was not sure whether she wanted to go. She told me she saw Athena's online class. She wants to register for Anatomy, The Story of the Science and Biology 101 for middle school. If she goes to private school, she could not attend the class. But she likes the science class in the private school.

My DD is eight years old. She is homeschooled since K. Recently she was admitted to a local prestigious gifted private school with scholarship which covers half of the tuition. The school is very strong in STEM. The school requires a minimum of certain IQ scores, tests, shadow day and interviews for admission. My DD met all of the admission requirements. We are debating whether to accept the offer. Pros: The school is very strong in STEM and offers a lot of STEM related clubs like math club and robotics club. Students from this school rank high in Science Olympiad. The school has four labs and provides a lot of hands on activities. For math and ELA, the students are placed in different grades based on their skills, not on their ages. The school claims they are very good at supporting gifted student academically and emotionally. DD is likely to find likely mind peers at school. My DD does not have any friend except my DS. She does not share common interest with other peers in our neighborhood. Cons: 1) We still have to pay $20,000 a year. 2) One way commute is 30 minutes. I have to drive four times to drop off and pick up her. My DS goes to another school which is in the opposite direction. I would not be able to spend more time to help my DS who has ASD and ADHD. 3) We are not very into the ELA and Social Science curriculum of the school. We use classical approach to educate my DD. The school does not offer any narration, copy, dictation, recitation etc. Classical literature is not included in the ELA. World history is also excluded from K-8. We are afraid if DD goes to this school, she will not learn as much as she learned from home. 4) If my DD goes to the school, She will have less time for her extra activities. I have to cut her sports and art time since her school is far away from home. We are debating whether to take the offer. Right now she is very strong in Math, ELA and History. She is taking math class from AOPS. For ELA and History, I use the curriculum recommended by WTM. What we are lacking is peer interaction, science labs, science hands on activities and opportunities to compete in Science Olympiad. Any suggestions are welcomed. Thanks.

My DD is eight years old. She was homeschooled since K. Recently she was admitted to a local prestigious gifted private school with scholarship which covers half of the tuition. The school is very strong in STEM. The school requires a minimum of certain IQ scores, tests, shadow day and interviews for admission. My DD met all of the admission requirements. We are debating whether to accept the offer. Pros: The school is very strong in STEM and offers a lot of STEM related clubs like math club and robotics club. Students from this school rank high in Science Olympiad. The school has four labs and provides a lot of hands on activities. For math and ELA, the students are placed in different grades based on their skills, not on their ages. The school claims they are very good at supporting gifted student academically and emotionally. DD is likely to find likely mind peers at school. My DD does not have any friend except my DS. She does not share common interest with other peers in our neighborhood. Cons: 1) We still have to pay $20,000 a year. 2) One way commute is 30 minutes. I have to drive four times to drop off and pick up her. My DS goes to another school which is in the opposite direction. I would not be able to spend more time to help my DS who has ASD and ADHD. 3) We are not very into the ELA and Social Science curriculum of the school. We use classical approach to educate my DD. The school does not offer any narration, copy, dictation, recitation etc. Classical literature is not included in the ELA. World history is also excluded from K-8. We are afraid if DD goes to this school, she will not learn as much as she learned from home. 4) If my DD goes to the school, She will have less time for her extra activities. I have to cut her sports and art time since her school is far away from home. We are debating whether to take the offer. Right now she is very strong in Math, ELA and History. She is taking math class from AOPS. For ELA and History, I use the curriculum recommended by WTM. What we are lacking is peer interaction, science labs, science hands on activities and opportunities to compete in Science Olympiad. Any suggestions are welcomed. Thanks. Thank you everyone for your valuable input! I have read every thread which gave me tremendous valuable information. Let me update some information: 1) We live in one of the biggest metropolitan area in the middle west. We have several top museums in the U.S. They do have some camps in winter and summer. We live in Suburbs. The commute for two way is 2-3 hours either by metra train or driving in the rush hours. 2) We live in the neighborhood where the housing price is cheaper than that of neighborhood with cut-throat public schools. But our neighborhood has none of excellent private EC programs. I have to drive one way 30-40 minutes for DD's drawing class and Robotics program. 3) There are a couple of Co-ops in my area. But I have not found any one to fit DD, especially one with a lot of gifted kids. I just feel homeschooling is not very popular in this metropolitan area. The people I know who value education either buy expensive house in cut-throat public schools or send kids to prestigious private schools. 4) DD had a shadow day at the gifted school. She told me she liked it. The best part is the science class. It is better than her public school's. ( She is homeschooled. But I send her back to public school for one semester). She felt the private school's ELS is not impressive and 3rd home room math is not challenging. ( The school differentiates the students. Some 3rd grader stay in the home room for 3rd math, some go to higher grades) 5) DD is not diagnosed with ASD. My DS has ASD. We took her to have a complete neuropsychological evaluation last year. She does have some traits shared with her brother. She does not have any friend except her brother. She is very engaged and enthusiastic sharing her ideas and interests in the EC classes. Her interests are so broad. But after class, she does not want to play or talk with any peers. She told me she is not interested in their topics. She is not good at small talk even though she could work with peers appropriately in a team project and talk about the project with them. The psychologist didn't give ASD diagnosis because she does not meet criterias. DD is a perfectionist and sometimes her emotions are intense.The psychologist suspected her having pragmatic language delay. So, I took her to evaluate by SLP specifically for her pragmatic language. But her score is 98 percentile. SLP told me it maybe her anxiety or personal preference not to have small talk with peers. 6) We talk with DD about the school choice. She told us she was not sure whether she wanted to go. She told me she saw Athena's online class. She wants to register for Anatomy, The Story of the Science and Biology 101 for middle school. If she goes to private school, she could not attend the class. But she likes the science class in the private school.

Hi Storygirl, Thank you so much for sharing your journeys. I feel the same pain. And your input gives me a lot of information and helps me rethink the whole situation. I totally agree my DS planted himself into trouble. He wants friends badly that he puts up with it. He did have IEP at school. He receives 30 minutes speech therapy and 20 minutes counseling per week at school. In addition, he has 45 minutes private SP, 60 minutes social skill group and 50 minutes counseling per week outside. He used to have ABA 10 hours a week. But I discontinued it. So we spend years of years working hard on his skills. He knows about many of the skills. But GENERALIZE and SELF REGULATE at the moment are so hard for him. It seems he is never able to utilize what he had learned. Right now I thought he was drawn to those kids because of he knew them in fourth grade. But I am now sure. I wanted to ask his teachers and other peers to find out. This group of kids are regarded as bad kids at school. So maybe he is drawn to this particular type of kids.

Thanks. Our school district is tiny. There is only one elementary school and one middle school. So there is no way to transfer him to another school in the district. And there is no school of choice option in my area.

Yes. His special education teacher told him that his friends are not true friends. And some of the thing his friends ask him to do is to set him up. He was told not to interact with them. And the group of kids were told not to interact with him. It is my DS who planted himself into trouble and was after those boys.

Thank for your suggestion. I totally agree Autism is NOT an excuse. I took this incident as a teachable moment for him to learn the serious consequence of this situation. No matter we move him to another school or take him back, he has to take the consequence of the threatening first. I am just debating whether I should move him out of this kind of environment or homeschool him after he resolved the issue. I went to school yesterday to talk to the Principle. I told her I totally support her if the school suspend or expel him because I want my DS to learn the consequence of threatening. But too bad, she does not want to do either. She told me she thought the boy was not a threat and made the comment from his disability. She offered to made some slides about the threatening and go over with my DS. That's it. I personally do not think my DS will realize how serious his gestures are. I am thinking of some consequences from our family. Do you have any suggestion?

Thanks for your suggestion. We have been working on his social skills for years. He has a social skill group once in a week, speech therapist once in a week and also meet with a psychologist once a week. He seems to know many of those skills. But he just is not able to use or generalize any of them at the MOMENT.

Hi everyone, I previously posted how my Autistic son struggled in Seventh grade. My DS is in seventh grade. He was homeschooled from his fifth grade to sixth grade because of pandemic. He went back to public school in August and quickly found his fourth-grade acquaintances. He thought those boys were still his friends and so he sits and plays with them during the lunch break and recess. Then he tried really hard to fit in but failed. Those boys made tricks for him to getting him in trouble or having a complete melting down at school. They continually tell him in public that his lunch stinks no matter whether it is homemade or store bought. They told him to having a trick or treat together without showing up. But my DS is still after those boys asking for justice and apology. He wanted to force them to be his friends. I reported to the school a couple of times. The special education teacher and I are working with his to tell a true friendship. The special education teacher even took him to have quiet lunch with her or have him sit on the other table with nicer kids. But once he is by himself, he keeps on going after those boys. So, three weeks ago, after lunch he confronted the three boys. They had an oral fight and ended up with punching each other. Last Friday, after lunch he was again after the three boys. The three boys laughed and mimicked his awkwardness in the chorus. He was very upset and had a quarrel with them again. One boy hit him and He hit back. Then He made a gesture of gun shot to one of the kids. He later confessed to me he learned from the book The Outsiders. The school taught The outsiders in the ELA class. I was told he is very into the book and the character. The school emailed me about his gun gesture and have not tell me what they are going to do with my DS since they are still doing some investigation. I am struggling now. It is a good opportunity for my DS to learn the lesson and take the consequence of conducting the threatening gestures and words. I know some autistic kids were misunderstood and shot by them from Internet. But on the other hand, I do not know whether I need to move him to a new school or have him homeschooled. Our current community is not friendly to the immigrant. There are only 3 to 4 Asian kids in the school. The academics are regarded as useless. Kids talk about sports, computer games, social medias all of the time. The school does not have any academic related clubs which my DS is stronger in. Is moving to a nice neighborhood and school an escape? Some people told me there are all kinds of people in the world. DS has to get used to it. I am also debating about homeschool. DS does great when homeschooled. I used the curriculum adapted from well trained mind. He made tremendously improvement. I dislike the curriculum in his current middle school. The public school cuts grammar, vocabulary and some other basics which are so important. The writing curriculum is terrible. They pay so much attention on critical thinking without training the kids the basic of writing. So DS ends up chunking out garbage and garbage of so called creative writing. The math program is more terrible. They teach middle school math using stories like scenario. The books are terrible and misleading than AOPS or even Holts. I just felt my DS did not learn anything academically at school. But surely he learned his lessons from his gun gesture. Do you guys homeschool? How do you support kids with social part? Any suggestion is welcomed.

Thank you so much for the detailed information. I did some research about Interoception. It makes sense to start interoception before Zone. I did not find any therapist practicing interoception in my area. Is it possible for a parent to self study and implement the curriculum with kid? Is The Interoception Curriculum: A Step-by-Step Guide to Developing Mindful Self-Regulation the starting point for parent? As for PT or OT, do I call them and ask whether they work on retained primitive reflexes? Right now, whenever I call OT offices, they never tell me what their expertise is. On their website, they advertised they treat and know almost everything. My son had a neuropsychological evaluation three years ago. On the report, there are some comments about language. He had a couple of other language testing by school and by outside SLPs. But I do not think they are solid language testing. If I want him to have solid language test, what should I ask SLP? Because most of the time I asked for language evaluation, they only did some simple ones. What kind of tests and areas should be covered in a complete and solid language test? Thanks!

Thank you for the book you recommend.

It is so painful to watch my poor kid struggling so much in sensory processing, executive function and emotional control. I recently dig into the Zones of regulation curriculum Is there any parent who implemented this curriculum? Does anyone use Occupational therapist to help? What kind of occupational therapist can help the regulation. We used to use a bunch of them. But they only did the gross motor and fine motor, I didn't feel they do a lot related with regulations.

Thank for explaining why he is after those mean and popular kids. We do not know how to find nice kids who share some of his interests at school. He is into history and geography. Our school is not a good school offering only sports related club. And I could not found any of the academic related clubs in my area. I am thinking of moving to nice school and neighborhood. But my budget is tight and I could not afford the housed in the better public school. And I noticed in the better public schools, they do have Geography bee or spelling bee clubs. I do not know whether better public schools will help him a lot.