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About ByeByeMartha

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  1. That's a good point too. Will there be children there? Perhaps some people who are afraid of animals? Anyone allergic to dogs? That could be your "out"---are your ILs considering the other guests?
  2. You really have my sympathy for being placed in this predicament. I don't know what they were thinking, but it sounds like they are expecting you to say yes and are just asking as a formality. 🙄 Frankly, I think it's rude. I had to chuckle about your DH's comment about "not knowing the puppy is there." Usually they're rambunctious toddlers, but maybe this is one of those very sleepy, calm puppies. Your DH isn't bothered by the idea, so if you end up having the puppy come, here is what I would do: promise yourself you will not lift a finger to tend to or clean up after the puppy. You will have enough on your plate. Allow your ILs and DH to care for the puppy and don't intervene no matter what happens. Perhaps there will be others who dote on the furry toddler and that could help. I'm really curious how this all turns out. I hope better than expected.
  3. I had just purchased a card from the Hallmark store and was sitting in my car in the parking lot writing in the card. All of a sudden I heard a tap on my window. I was so startled! An elderly man held up a piece of paper with some information written about him and was apparently begging. I didn't even read past "I am..." I was in such shock and felt fearful that I just told him to go away without opening my window. I then saw him walking around the parking lot looking for people in their cars and he stopped at another car with the driver inside and was there for a little bit. Then I drove away. Later I felt a little bad about it and still quite shaken. I've never had this happen to me before. Over the years our town has gotten worse and worse with begging and people standing at corners and freeway exits with small children, their dog, etc. But I've never had someone actually tap on my car window while I was in a parking lot. That was so upsetting.😢
  4. I find this all so distressing for the girl. At the same time I wish we knew the parent’s side of they disapprove of the girl's boyfriend bc he's not of the same faith? Are the parents concerned about sexual activity outside of marriage? It would be understandable that they want their daughter to have the beliefs they passed down to her (although you cannot force it if course). You mentioned they want her to have a proper courtship...depends what that looks like...obviously something very stringent and cult-like isn't healthy. (I'm thinking back to the whole "I kissed dating goodbye" mentality 😞and how that all blew up...formulas don't work) There's never any excuse for physical abuse either. If she reports that to any authority the whole family could fall apart...make sure things are truly dire before giving her that recommendation. I understand it sounds like she's in an unhealthy, controlling environment and you want to help her. But make sure you truly have all the correct facts. The ramifications for her leaving her family are huge and potentially very long-lasting....she could end up separated from all of them for years and in a worse situation. You don't want that on your conscience.
  5. Some time ago there was a documentary about teens, screen time and their mental health. I thought it was good and our DD saw it too. There is a sequel now with showings throughout the country. Haven’t seen it yet but hoping to. I think it’s a good idea for teens to see it as well.
  6. I would agree about putting the relationship on hold for now, if possible. Would her parents be graduating her next June? if so, she doesn't have long to go and I it sounds like she has worked hard and deserves to be graduated so I would make that a priority as well as getting her ducks in a row over these next months. I personally wouldn't advocate for going the GED route unless absolutely necessary. It still carries a negative stigma with it. Also, I think it's ridiculous that the girl doesn't have access to her own CollegeBoard account. I'm surprised the parents are allowing her to take classes outside of the home at a local university, considering how controlling they seem. I understand that parents aren't obligated to pay for their child's college and it's reasonable to have expectations, but this situation sounds so extreme. The girl is 18 years old now and does have rights. Technically the parents aren't even allowed to have access to her school records (unless the girl signed a FERPA form.)
  7. High-school students who take college classes don’t always save time — or money As a spin-off to my thread about community college classes and transferability, I found the above article and wanted to share. It sounds like many people are finding that their Seniors may be graduating with a high school diploma and an Associate's Degree, but it doesn't mean it will transfer as an Associate's Degree--particularly if they go out of state and especially if the "college classes" were taught at the high school itself. Personally, I would be very wary of any dual enrollment course that is taking place at the high school and not the community college. eta: maybe this should be moved to the high school board?
  8. Thank you all for your helpful replies! 😊 The key is to know exactly where my DD will end up...which we're not sure of yet, but she's planning to stay in state. Certainly makes it challenging if you don't know where you're eventually going, so I figure we should try to cater to the one that has the most stringent requirements. Many CC have a DTA (direct transfer agreement of an Associate'es degree) with some of the in-state universities. Doesn't always guarantee it will be seamless, though. I already noticed one college requires an additional English course beyond the 2. There is also no guarantee that requirements/transfer equivalencies won't change over the next couple of years. Oh well...I was her guidance counselor throughout her high school years, so we'll figure this all out as we go.
  9. I have no issue with anyone making choices that are different from mine--unless it affects me or my family in some way. I am a taxpayer and public education, programs, etc. are paid for by taxpayers like me. So I do care that the money is used wisely and I do care that my taxes have been increasing quite a lot to fund various govt programs in my area/state.
  10. I don't care for the concept of boarding schools--whether public, private, missionary, etc. But that's just my personal educational philosophy. I do understand that many families choose it willingly.
  11. I have a different opinion about how hearts get fixed but I don't want to derail the thread. And I believe that the breakdown of the family is responsible for a lot of society's ills.
  12. I think that there are more men struggling with sexual sin today than we are aware of.
  13. I've not been to Texas, but these are a few things that would encourage me about Baylor and Waco if my kid were to go there: 1) a 2-3 hour drive from Waco to Austin, Dallas or Houston 2) Good school 3) Warm weather 4) Magnolia Table Restaurant 😄 (and Chip and Joanna Gaines!) You could check out College Confidential to hear what others are saying about Baylor. And I would get a ton of information about Waco from their tourism site (pdf or request printed materials)
  14. I would really be concerned about an idea like that. Placing vulnerable children from dysfunctional homes into such a closed environment could subject them to a system of abuse. There may be some children for whom the trajectory of their lives are changed for the better, but this just sounds like old-fashioned institutionalization. Humans are always trying to fix sin with man-made systems, but the real problem is the heart of mankind.
  15. Ironically they are calling it the "Family Friendly Schools Act." You can't make this stuff up. To your 2nd point about outreach programs, you are very correct and that's a thread topic in itself--particularly about short term people are "repainting the orphanage."
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