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About ByeByeMartha

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    Hive Mind Larvae

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  1. Since you've already received a number of suggestions I will just add this-- Just make sure that whatever you choose your DD is OK with it. I don't know how much it matters to her but for many brides it does. Ps I think the lace dress is very lovely, but if you want short sleeves the other dress would work
  2. As someone who doesn't use FB, I'm always saddened when boards go away.
  3. I'm interested!😊 I have a 19 yo. Will this be a private group? I'd love to be part of a very supportive, encouraging group for moms of older kiddos!
  4. DD did not file a report but was very concerned about some of the things he texted her. The security dept read the texts and we're very concerned and said she should file a formal report bc they were concerned about his mental health. Her giving him her number was bc he said he wanted math help...which she's since learned was a lie bc he's supposedly quite intelligent and doing great in the class. She took him at his word of needing math help and was taken aback when his texts went in some odd directions.She Isn't interested in dating but is fine having male friends. Anyway, he has not attended the last 3 classes... he's missed a quiz and a mid-term exam...something is not right here.
  5. We've had Pfaltzgraff Pistoulet for over a decade. We love the colors and patterns, but we have had problems with it chipping easily. Especially the square plates--they are the worst. I don't think one of our square plates is chip-free. And I worry about things like lead and safety in my dinnerware. I've been considering what our next set will be so I'm enjoying reading everyone's comments. 😊
  6. The instructor does state in his syllabus to expect at least 10 hrs outside of class doing homework and studying so I guess that's what it takes. It's a 5 credit class. I found a review of his class online and apparently he is known for giving a lot of work. i also found some other online links for college Pre-Calc classes and they also say expect over 12 hrs of work outside of class. Another link says that when you take college Pre-Calc and Calculus to take a lighter load of classes bc it requires a lot of time--especially if you want to get a 4.0 in the class (which she is on target for right now).
  7. How many hours of homework a week would you expect in a college Pre-Calc class? DD is taking this course at a community college and the instructor's syllabus said that the homework would be a minimum of 10hrs a week. Sure enough it has been about 15 hrs a week of homework every week. He gives a lot of problems. Since it's a CC and they're on the qtr system it moves pretty fast, so perhaps that's normal. Dd is doing great in the class and most of the work is very familiar to her bc of what she learned in high school (homeschool) so it's not that she's struggling with any of it (she loves math). There is just a ton of time-consuming work. Would you say this is typical?
  8. Stalking/following is a very concerning issue to me and this sounds like what thus guy is doing. Like Garden mom said I would be interested to know if someone took her phone and car if he would show up. I realize this requires some effort but I would test this out. Obviously this guy is enamored with your Dd and is hoping she'll eventually take to him. If she knows she has no interest in him, I think that needs to be communicated to him directly. I just pray he isn't to the point that he's become obsessed with her.
  9. That's how DD and I feel as well. She doesn't even know this guy and has hardly spoken with him in class (there isn't time anyway). He sent multiple texts with questions before she would "nicely" πŸ™„ respond later. She's not accustomed to texting much with people bc she prefers talking face to face. It's been a bit of an adventure hearing about DD's experiences in this class...the attitudes of many of the students, the F-bomb being used in class frequently. She told me that any conversation she has had in that class was initiated by the other party (guys needing help and such). The first day a girl sat next to her and initiated a conversation w my DD. And when the girl heard the instructor say that homework would not be graded she turned to my Dd and said, "yeah, I'm so not doing any homework." The girl soon realized DD is not the academically lazy type and has since moved on to sit with other girls in the class. There is an older woman in the class who came to the study group Dd attended and they worked together. (There were only 2 other students who attended the study group that day) . DD said she's going to make an effort to sit next to her on Monday because she's nice, studious and most likely safe. You know these homeschoolers--they get along with adults very well. πŸ˜„ DD hasn't responded to his last text and he hasn't texted again. We'll see how things go over the next few days. Definitely a learning experience. She's annoyed that people seem to always have some ulterior motive for being "friendly" with her. We're having lots of conversations about boundaries--which we've had in the past, but like everything else, repetition is necessary.
  10. It was more than 50 texts over a 24 hr period.
  11. Other thoughts we have-- 1) What if he really is depressed, possibly suicidal and/or having health symptoms? What if DD doesn't report it and something happens to him? (I spoke w/the security dept in person and showed them the texts but did not give my name, DD's name, the boy's name, the class etc.) We don't know if he truly meant chest pains or emotional "heart" pains b/c English is not his native language. 2) What if he's playing (manipulating) her for some reason. Dd said "I don't know if how he presents himself is true or an act." 3) What if he has some incorrect assumptions about American girls and American culture? There is a huge population of int'l students like him at the cc with many resources available to them. I'm sure he went through an orientation process. eta: DD has participated in the instructor's study group (he has times throughout the week where he--the instructor-- is present). She enjoys study groups and wants to get to know other people, but is concerned that this boy is manipulating her into becoming his girlfriend. She said when he texted her about being lonely, depressed etc. (after knowing him for less than 1 day) it was very burdensome for her and makes her worry that if she says the wrong thing or is not available she could feel responsible for him harming himself.
  12. (I'd prefer this to be posted in one of the private forums so if anyone can tell me how to move it let me know.) DD is taking a math class at cc (she graduated HS). She is really loving the course itself and is doing very well. There are quite a few international students at the cc on F1 Visas and in her class. Several of the guys (boys?) have been asking her for help in the class. One, in particular, asked for her cell phone number for math help and she gave it to him. (I wish she hadn't and she regrets it too.) Within 24 hrs of texting (very little about math and mostly about him talking about his psychology class, sending her his essay and other and chit chat) he asked her if she knows of a good church near the school (he knows she is a Christian). She asked him what kind of church he is looking for and said she is not familiar with the churches near school (she commutes). His response was (with these emoticons): I am not sure. I feel that I cannot spend too much time being alone, so I want to find place I can go or something I can do on the weekend.πŸ˜ͺ After school or during the weekend, I always feel sad, depressed and powerless. For example I have a strong chest pain right now. 😭 DH and I advised her how to respond and she said: I'm so sorry to hear that. I'll let you know if I hear of a good church near there. He said: ok thank you. The next morning he texted her: Hi good morning. Do you want to study math with me together in our school library tomorrow?πŸ˜ƒBy the way how can I call you?πŸ€” Again DH and I advised her and several hrs later she responded: I'm sorry I don't have time. Mr. (the instructor) has a bunch of study groups you could go to. Apparently in class he did not say one word to her. Within 10 mins of the class ending he texted her: I see. Have a good day. And she said: thank you, you too. Several hrs later he texted her: Hi how was your test today?πŸ˜ƒ I felt it was difficult 😰 (they had a quiz in the same math class that day) DH told her not to respond. She does not have time for this and if he is looking for a girlfriend, she is not interested. She is very uncomfortable with the frequent texting, the fact that most of it has been unrelated to math and his sharing his feelings with her like this (with an abundance of emoticons). This is all within a few days. I, DH and Dd decided I would talk to someone at the school bc if he is really depressed, then that is a concern too bc he is from another country. (If he is simply saying he is lonely and depressed to garner sympathy from her than that is another issue--creepy too) I ended up speaking with someone in security and showed them the texts. They recommended that she file a report...they said it could be someone who is just socially awkward, may have mental issues, could have a history etc. Who knows? You just never know. I asked them if DD should point him to resources for Int'l students, and they said that should come through them. We have no experience with stuff like this. DD has been HSd her whole life and this is her first college class. She is not on social media and doesn't text often. She is a very nice person with a big heart and worries about hurting people's feelings. She is really liking the course but this issue (and other guys asking her for help when I think they may be flirting with her...she's a little naΓ―ve about boys' intentions) is casting a shadow on it. What do you think? Have any of your kiddos had experiences like this? Should DD file a report w/the school? She is not fond of that idea bc she doesn't want trouble...she hates drama and wants peace. DH and I advised her to tell him (via text so there's documentation) that she's uncomfortable with their texting and to ask him to stop.
  13. ***UPDATE*** So after test driving many cars (multiple all drivers in our family LOL) we ended up buying a new Camry. It's an adjustment, for sure. I think the manual that comes with it is thicker than my Bible.πŸ˜„ I am trying to look on the bright side of things and be grateful for a quality, new car, but I can't deny some of the issues. I won't go into a comprehensive list, but I'll share a few of them. 1) the lake keep assist is indeed a bit of problem sometimes. It actually does nudge you back into the lane whichis waht it's designed to do. Of course, the driver overrides it by pulling it back, but I wouldn't want to have a loose grip on the steering wheel when that happens. When I've had to cross a line bc of a bicyclist or a police car on the side of the highway, it has nudged me back in their direction. On one occasion when there was a change in the lines because of construction, it couldn't comprehend it and tried to pull me into the cement divider. 2)This doesn't pertain to technology, but is a pet peeve of mine w/the car...headrests have been redesigned for safety reasons and tilt forward. Bc I'm not very tall and keep the seat moved quite a bit forward, when I want to rotate the sunvisor to the side window, the headrest is in the way. So I have to move the angle of the seat to move the headrest to my side window. 3) This is my first experience with automatic climate control and it's a hoot. It don't like it at all but am trying to make peace with it. It seems its answer to everything is "turn on the A/C." My DD laughs and keeps quoting a reputable review which called the system "appalling." 4)Backup camera is helpful but not so much when the lens is wet. Gotta remember to wipe it when it rains around here...which is often. 5)The model we have has 3 driving modes: eco, normal and sport. When driving the eco it feels like it really lacks power...i feel like I'm driving a Yugo. You definitely need sport to power up hills. If you live in a hilly place like San Francisco, you would have to drive it in sport mode all the time so the other 2 would be worthless imo. It seems to me that the better gas mileage promised on the newer Camry is based on driving it mostly in eco mode. It feels like the sport mode is similar in power/acceleration to the regular mode of our previous Camry, which is surprising. There are a few other minor preference/quality items that I found disappointing...the little coin drawer is made much more cheaply now, the cabin lights are those cold, white LED that I don't care for and the passenger side mirror does not come with a light--even though this model is a step up from our last one (which had a light). DH thinks that may have been part of a package we didn't purchase, but our car did come with automatic interior lighting throughout. Other preferences I would have liked--more knobs and less buttons on the climate control/infotainment console. Anyway, that's a little update. I'm still glad we got the car bc it will definitely serve its purpose and all the other cars had issues too. So I'm going to press on and be happy regardless. Best of luck to anyone else car shopping. πŸ˜‰
  14. This article is over a year old but it spoke to me Cars Have Become Too Complicated But Change May Be Coming From the article: "When you get a new car, it used to be that you'd have to get used to a gearbox with an extra speed or windows that were electric instead of manual. Today, the learning curve is much longer and steeper." "...people end up paying for features they never wanted in their cars, simply because they're bundled into big option packages." Unfortunately, this has been my experience.
  15. Kia and Hyundai has been on our list too. While we were at the Hyundai dealer we took a look at their Gene$i$ line...nice! JD Power just came out with a report of the car brand people don't want to buy again--Smart--which I find ironic. πŸ˜‰ During our research we've been reading about some problems with the lane assist (among other features)--when you want to go around a bicyclist/construction and you go on the line it jerks you back. Having blind spot view sounds smart, but the lane assist feature is being promoted to help people when they veer off bc they are drowsy or lose their attention. Maybe they shouldn't be driving! DD and I saw a woman hit the car in front of her bc she was texting while on the freeway while in traffic. We talked about how the automatic braking probably would have prevented that, but do we really want to enable people to text while driving? Probably one of the most problematic things we're noticing with the newer sedans is the lack of visibility out the rear window. I could live with most of the technology bc you can disable it (at least for now...wonder if the govt will eventually regulate all this). But the way they're designing sedans, it's no wonder the sale of SUVs are increasing. Yup! I get sensory overload so that's another issue for me. Our DD drives--learned to drive on our old sedan without all the bells and whistles-- and I'm glad bc I want her to think and judge for herself. I worry that our youth won't be able to really know how to drive bc they will become so dependent on indicators...they're not going to train their brain the way we learned to.
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