Bianca
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Posts posted by Bianca
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I wonder if there is something else going on? I was so wrung out dealing with my dd with math that I finally decided to start her on ADD meds (she had been diagnosed 9 years earlier). She went from hating math to now I have to pull her off it to go do other subjects. Turns out she does like math but was so frustrated that she couldn't stick with it that it came across as tantrums, "I hate math", "I'm stupid", refusing to do it, lies, etc.
I'm not suggesting your child has ADD because of course I don't know. But it may be worth looking into other possibilities. What I learned through all of this is that it shouldn't be this hard on the parent or child. If it is, it may not be parenting issues or willful child behavioral issues that can be changed through parenting techniques.
I feel for you and wish you good luck!
ADD is definitely a possibility. My other son has it much worse and he's on curcumin and fish oil which seems to be helping. I need to get this one on it too. It's not easy to get him to take stuff, he's pretty stubborn. I'm convinced I need to try though. I don't want this misery to continue. As it is he can't function in the morning without coffee. Not normal for a kid.
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I can speak to the chemical sensitivities. I was extremely MCS years ago. Does he even feel well enough to do school work? I'm guessing that's factoring a lot into your compliance and behavioral issues. Have you traced what has increased the sensitivities and are you on a path to helping? I ended up, after an enviro doc, chelation, supplements, you name it, going with a nutritionist. She rebuilt my immune system, and in about a year the whole MCS thing started turning around. It's all food and a lot of work, but if you want a radically different option like that, that involves no controversial shots, drops, treatments, etc., just food, you can write me backchannel for her info.
I have MCS. I'm working on it, but I can't afford much in the way of help. I'm sure it does play into his learning issues. It makes me so sad for him. And now that he's a teen, it's incredibly difficult for me to control his diet. He knows what's good for him, but at 14 he just wants what he wants. At least he's not reacting to chemicals every day anymore like he was in school.
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If it was a rough year overall because of lack of consistency in doing math every day, for a set amount of time or a set lesson/day, I doubt changing to any particular curriculum will solve that issue. A couple things that worked for us for those subjects that just didn't get done consistently were 1) a small peer group working together on the same material and/or 2) outside accountability.
My boys tend to be very independent and diligent, managing their own studies, so it was never a problem getting them to do their work. If anything, I was the bottleneck in how much they covered simply because, with cooking, cleaning, other children, I had less time than they did. They loved a writing class and a couple of literature classes that they did together with a small group of friends/peers. Small groups offer external motivation & accountability, both for the students and the parents. Since it's usually enjoyable for the students, they're eager to get together with their friends and they want to have their work done for the class. When the group meets every week at a given time, things tend not to slide. The whole "life happened so we never got to it" excuse somehow doesn't crop up.
My daughter and I started butting heads over school work constantly last year. She is more than capable of the work, but she'd rather spend the whole day, every day, reading the books she's interested in and having no outside responsibilities. She also loves to argue simply for the sake of arguing. She wears me out arguing in circles about this or that assignment or about how "it's boring," etc. She knows it eventually wears me down and uses it to her advantage! So, with her, we're going to use some live online classes to provide outside (ie, not me) accountability and to remove any interpersonal roadblocks to getting the work done. A live online class meets regularly every week and someone else gives and grades the assignments. With an outside instructor and class, there's no point arguing me in circles about assignments and/or grades! And, with other students her age doing the same exact work, it's hard to argue that it's "too much work."
If you can somehow pull together a small group, or even just one other student, for your son to study with, it might make the work more enjoyable for him and that would make it more likely to happen.
Or, if you can swing a live class, online or local, that might help with motivation and accountability. It would, at the very least, ensure that your son completed a solid year of math this year, starting at whatever level he's at. (I'd avoid video-based instruction because it requires a lot of self-discipline and you would need to provide the accountability for it.)
Good luck! I know it's hard.
yvonne
I agree, no curriculum can fix a problem with compliance. I just feel so wrung out trying to deal with him. We can't afford outside help really, so I feel pretty trapped. I belong to a local homeschooling group, so maybe I can ask there if anyone knows of inexpensive or free resources that we could use to help him with his math.
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Math-U-See is another curriculum with placement tests for diagnosing strengths and weaknesses.
+1 for really getting into the heart of the problem. If you are not a math person, you may need to use a tutor to work with him to understand his strengths and weaknesses.
Take a a look at the teaching style versus learning style fit as well. Do you teach, or do you try to use self-teaching? If he is self-teaching, will he actually come find you and ask questions or does he plow ahead (perhaps not even realizing he is missing part of the concept)? If you are teaching, are you helping too much or too little? Would he do better with someone who is not emotionally involved? Does he do better with or without manipulatives? Does he prefer to read a book, watch a video, just jump in and try problems? etc. There are a lot of ways to learn math. Spend some time figuring out the all the lessons you have learned about what doesn't work and then look for curricula that use a different slant.
He never wants help. He throws a fit if I try to teach him. But at the same time he often doesn't get it and won't ask for help. He just leaves it undone and refuses to finish. I'm so frustrated I feel like just giving up on him. He also has a fit if I tell him I'm going to hire a tutor because he's painfully shy and can't stand being with strangers. Public school is not an option because he has chemical sensitivities and he gets really sick from things at school.
Last year we did Math U See. He refused to watch the instructional videos as well as refused to let me teach him. When he used Teaching Textbooks, he often skipped the tutorial and all the practice problems and only did the problems on the lesson that he already understood.
So this is as much a behavioral and parenting issue as it is a learning problem. I'm out of ideas. But I still have not read all my responses here so maybe I'll pick something up.
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Where can I find a Mammoth placement test?
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My ds had a really bad 8th grade year, in math especially. He only got through about half the curriculum and even that was done badly. How can I get him up to speed so that he can start Algebra 1 and actually understand it? We used Singapore last year, which he didn't like much. We used Teaching Textbooks before, which he also didn't like. I'm not sure there is any math curricula that he would like, as he just seems to hate it all. We're trying Kahn academy this year, but I'm beginning to realize that there's no way he's going to get what he needs just with that. Suggestions please!
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I just found this: http://www.northwestuntest.com/ through Washingtonhomeschool.org. It's hard to believe it could be that easy, but if it is, I'm very happy!
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Okay, thanks guys. So helpful. I'm so glad I came here for help!
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Not sure how helpful this is but honestly, I don't worry about it. I am in Washington and I do the testing to meet the requirement. I have no idea if the test that they take is common core standardized or not. I keep all their test scores in a file just in case they ever need to go to public school for whatever reason. My kids do testing through a local guy who offers a group testing date. He uses the (CTBS)-Survey Plus.
To me the testing is just a hoop I need to jump through in order to home educate legally in my state. This year I did to an individual assessment for my youngest child with the same guy who does the group testing. It was a lot faster, but it cost more. I did this because my DS can't go to group testing due to severe food allergies and snacks that others bring. Next year I am going to look into online testing options instead. I know a number of teachers but I have never felt comfortable asking them to evaluate my kids. It just seemed very awkward taking up their time and not knowing how much to offer to pay, and so on.
Can't we just test for free with the public schools? And what is the CTBS? I thought my only option would be the MSP.
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I'm in Washington where they require either annual state testing or an assessment of progress written by a certified teacher. My concern is that I don't want my kids having to take the common core standardized tests. Last year when we were enrolled in online public school, I opted out of state testing. It was not easy and I was made to feel like I was breaking the law (I wasn't). I just asked to be allowed to have my kids assessed in some other way, and the school capitulated.
This year we're homeschooling. Whenever I've homeschooled before I've skipped the state tests because I wasn't aware that WA homeschooling law required them. I don't want to break the law, so this year I'll have to either make them do the tests or find a teacher who's willing to assess them. I don't want to do either, really. I wish I lived in Idaho or Texas!
So my question is: how do you feel about the common core standardized tests? And do you think it's worth it to submit to an assessment to avoid the tests?
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Thank you all so much for sharing. Every comment is helpful to me. I've struggled so long with this and I'm so ready to try to make things easier and more enjoyable for him.
OhElizabeth, thank you so much for your input about the transcript. That is actually very helpful. I think I read years ago about non-traditional transcripts, but I guess I hadn't thought about it in awhile. That sounds like a great option because it validates his interests and shows him that they are important, not just a side issue. Also, I had had that idea myself about encouraging him to blog about gaming and gaming PCs. I'm a blogger myself and I know it's a wonderful way to improve writing skill, especially with the editing software available at Wordpress.
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Wow! Way too expensive!!! Memoria Press has it for $25, e-book for $22.
http://www.memoriapress.com/curriculum/educational-resources-special-needs/simply-classical
Thanks! That's definitely going on my reading list. I've already read some of the samples provided on Amazon and it looks very interesting.
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I'm saying this really gently, but you need to separate your grief from what's good for him. As a parent you're going to grieve over things not being the way you thought, but evals can help you move on to being realistic and pro-active.
If he can earn a living wage and is happy, is there an issue? Is there ID or something else going on that would qualify him for disability services? Do you not anticipate him being able to make a living wage or live independently?
Oh, I know he'll probably do fine. I just want him to understand what education can do for him. I don't want him to get to a stage where he's really frustrated that he didn't do the kind of high school work that would help him get into college or tech school.
He's capable of doing most conventional high school curriculum, I think. In spite of his discomfort with reading, he still manages. I just don't want it to be so uncomfortable or discouraging for him anymore. I want to find a way of doing it that removes some of the obstacles so he can truly enjoy it. Or at least some of it. And yes, I'm convinced I've got to get him evaluated one way or another.
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Yes, classical education can be done with LDs. The book Simply Classical, by Cheryl Lowe, would give you an idea of how to going about doing this for a high school age student, where to start, how to modify, how to decide what to include, etc. She would argue that the approach is beneficial even starting at the high school level, but you would need to determine the possible benefits/drawbacks for yourself. If you want to post questions to her directly, she is over at the Memoria Press forums, under "Struggling Students" and can give you advice specific to your situation. I also recommend that you get him an evaluation, as it will give you a much clearer idea of what's going on as well as his current level of functioning, which will be crucial when you start to select curriculum.
That looks excellent but, oh my goodness! Why is it so expensive?? Amazon has it for 54.95! I would love to read it though.
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If you're in the US, federal law REQUIRES the public school to evaluate. If your insurance won't cover private evals, then go through the ps.
If programming isn't his interest with computers, what about other practical aspects that lead to jobs? I heard about one boy with strong obsessions like that who ended up managing an Apple store. Or maybe working Geek Squad at Best Buy? Maybe get him some interships? I wouldn't try to make him interested in the aspects he's not into but would find where his interests actually lead in the field.
And yes, let's release the guilt and do right by our kids. :grouphug:
Yep, those jobs sound just about right for him. I just don't want him to be limited to something like that. You're right about not trying to force interest in things. I try to be casual about it. Hopefully he doesn't feel pressured. But I want him to know what's out there in the computer field.
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I lost my post, so this will likely be shorter.
OhElizabeth, thanks for that. I needed to hear that. Sometimes I get so worried about the fact that he doesn't learn like other kids and doesn't have any interest in the things I wish he would learn. His interest lies almost exclusively in the realm of PC gaming and gaming PCs. In fact, he's gardening all summer to earn gaming PC components so he can build his own. I support him all the way in this because I think he's learning valuable skills. I'm trying to also interest him in game design and computer programming.
He's really smart. He just doesn't seem very smart when he tries to express himself because of whatever cognitive problems he's got going on. And he doesn't learn much outside of his narrow field of interest other than what he's forced to read (which he promptly forgets most of the time anyway).
I'll have to see if our insurance might cover an evaluation. Likely not, but it's worth a shot.
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So could I have him do course work that's at a lower level but still call it high school, make him a transcript, etc. Or should I hold him back?
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I've had my three boys in either online or alternative public school for the past two years. This year we're going to switch back to homeschooling with the younger two. My youngest is well beyond grade level and will probably do great with a classical curriculum. But my middle child seems to have great difficulty with speaking, reading and writing. He hasn't been evaluated, but I know there's something going on. I asked for an evaluation when he was in 2nd grade (public school) but his teacher didn't think he needed it. I should have insisted.
Anyway, is it even reasonable to try classical education with a child that struggles as much as he does? If I do, I know I'll have to tweak it considerably until it probably won't resemble classical education very much. But I want this for him. I want him to learn to reason logically and to love books and foreign languages and art and music and to be interested in the whole wide world, not just the world of the internet, video games and Netflix. Maybe that's totally unreasonable and I should just do what's easy. I don't know.
He's going into 9th grade and he's not even remotely ready for that level of learning. But I don't want him to be held back for years trying to catch up on all the things he should learn in a classical curriculum.
How do you do it?? How much do you tweak? What do you sacrifice and what do you stick with? What curricula have you found that works for your LD kids?
Very bad 8th grade year (last year) what to do now?
in High School and Self-Education Board
Posted
Thanks so much everyone! Sorry I haven't been around, been so busy and sick at the same time. Lots of good ideas. I'll be looking into that Bridgeway math for both boys, that sounds like it might be just what we need. He's doing much better now, but I'm sure we'll struggle on a regular basis in the future unless I can get this figured out. It really helps if he eats protein and takes a multi in the morning. I just have to stay on top of him about it. I'll check out that ADD forum too, I'm sure I'll learn a lot.