Galatea
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Posts posted by Galatea
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1 hour ago, ktgrok said:
But the point is, the reason they wear them is to contain their droplets/germs. If masks do this, it makes sense to wear them during a pandemic to protect others. If masks do not do this, then why do surgeons wear them?
Surgeons wear masks during surgery to keep open wounds from getting contaminated, to prevent infection in wounds! Not only do masks protect from "germs" but also from foreign matter like food, etc., that might be present in a person's mouth!
That is completely different from masking while a person is ill. I can't believe thinking people would correlate the two.
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5 hours ago, Dotwithaperiod said:
There are multiple interviews with the woman who made the film and her reason for doing so. Not picking on you here, I just think it would behoove everyone to try to read as much of what she has said and perhaps even watch the damn movie before screeching. Becausefor me, it really lessons my opinions of people who instantly begin a rant and then admit to not seeing or reading whatever’s being discussed. And yes, that applies to a topic as serious as this. And no, you don’t know what I think of the movie just because of my politics or which posts I’ve liked.
Im just here to roll my eyes at most of this, anyways, lol. All over the internet, people are puffed up like broody hens, squawking about how aghast they are. They won’t cancel their Netflix, they’ll still watch their asinine reality shows where women are sexualized and they’ll cheer about shows that are nothing more than men brutalizing women, they’ll make excuses for their political leaders who mock the physically/mentally challenged and break nearly every one of His commandments, they’ll defend religious leaders who can’t keep their pants zipped. The roar of the hypocrites is deafening.
This is a disgusting take on the controversy. First to categorize people's objections as "screeching" or being "broody hens" which are both sexist statements. I hope you examine your own misogyny here.
Then to assume that people won't cancel Netflix (I did btw). or that they commonly watch "asinine reality shows where women are sexualized" or "men brutalizing women." I for one hate all reality shows because of the types of themes that are so common, including stereotyping and looking down on women like you're doing. And just to point out, the things you mentioned there involved ADULTS and we're talking about CHILDREN.
Assuming everyone is a hypocrite is sure an easy way to pretend that what we're talking about doesn't matter. And yes, I watched it. Yes, I cancelled. Yes, I'm horrified that it got made and I'm even more horrified by people defending this. I know what sexual exploitation and abuse of children is and does because it happened to me.
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4 hours ago, Dobby's Sock said:
And yet, recent statistics show that 90% of kids 8-18 have watched p*rn at least once. Saying that should just watch MTV in the movie would be absolutely ridiculous.
I think what is happening in this conversation is the bias of slightly sheltered homeschoolers who just can't imagine what actually goes on in "the real world", especially from the viewpoint of a recent Muslim immigrant to a society vastly more open than what she is used to.
I might not be a "recent Muslim immigrant" but I for one was certainly not sheltered, not even slightly. I was in foster care from the age of 3. I know what happens to girls with no parents, girls who no one looks out for, who are trying to find their place in the world. They get sexualized at a very young age, often by parents and foster parents and teachers and coaches and priests.
Sure, talking about that is helpful. I talk about a ton of sensitive things like this with my daughter, who is 11 herself. And sometimes girls this young may even be exploring their own sexual feelings at this age of viewing how other girls and women use their bodies for attention or material gain and wonder if they should also.
But there is a big, big difference between children doing this on their own and parents having discussions with them about it vs adults like all of the people involved in this movie having 600 girls come dance provocatively for them to see if the could do it right, picking a few of them and teaching them even more moves and sucking on fingers while looking at the camera and slapping their own vagina over their very skimpy clothing, and then having them perform it over and over for a whole crew and camera so they can get that dance scene just right enough to look as bad as it does. And then the director and editors went through all that film and picked shots that zoom in on litter girls vaginas and butts to look as provocative as possible.
The message the words of the movie are trying to say does not matter more than the one being made by the images, and certainly not more than what these little girls were made to do for a movie.
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1 hour ago, Where's Toto? said:
There is an interview available that goes into how they handled the filming with the actresses involved. They evidently did a lot to make sure the girls were okay and comfortable with the process. I haven't seen the movie so I don't really want to say anything more until I do.
Sitting down with a child and explaining them how to dance provocatively, suck on their fingers, frame their vagina for the camera, etc and then talking to them about how they feel and that it's all okay because it's for a good reason is textbook grooming. This is the exact thing abusers do. "It's just this little thing. It will make me happy. See, nothing bad happened. How do you feel? Doesn't that make you feel good that you made me happy?" Just because a director, psychologist or parent is the one saying it doesn't make it any less grooming and child exploitation than the sex offender down the street that everyone imagines as some creepy old guy. Because most abusers are in fact people who put themselves in positions of trust.
This movie DID normalize this for these girls. Making this movie had them doing all of these actions and told them it was okay if it was for a good reason.
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My daughter and I have been reading and enjoying The Notebook of Doom and Dragon Masters series.
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Regarding the whining when a fun activity is over, I always give my daughter a time count when time is running out. "Ok, we can play 10 more minutes and then I need to make dinner." It helps it be less of a surprise and disappointment to my daughter.
Regarding the class, is your daughter introverted or extroverted? I find myself often dreading leaving the house even for activities I enjoy because I'm fairly introverted. Sometimes I have to convince myself I really will enjoy it. And it helps if I have some quiet or alone time before and after. If she is introverted that's something to consider.
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Of course there's a difference. One perfectly illustrates the whole belief system you're espousing here, so cultural history is of course good enough. The other didn't fit what you wanted to hear, so your first demanded evidence, then decided it was irrelevant because it might go against one of the other ideas you're arguing for here. It's arrogance and rigidity of belief at it's finest.I simply asked for evidence. It wasn't a refusal to consider the possibility and the implications, which, as I pointed out to you, I did anyway.
There is also a bit of a difference in the expectation of evidence for something that was supposed to have happened ~4000 years ago and something that was supposed to have happened less than 200 years ago, but that's somewhat beside the point.
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Not talking about it's significance. I'm talking about your demand for evidence on onehand, but lack of care on the other. It shows where you are being obtuse.I already addressed the prospect of "gay marriage" in Native America and it's relative significance. Scroll back a few pages.
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There is no remaining archeological evidence for Sodom and Gomorrah. Could be because they were destroyed. The fact that there is a cultural history is evidence in itself though, isn't it?
So cultural history is good enough to support your view of Sodom and Gomorrah, but cultural history isn't enough to support whether or not Native Americans allowed gay people to marry?
Be careful, your blinders are showing.
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What is irritating? If it's the case we live in a market driven economy, if a publicly traded company decides to remove potentially offensive games because it it might hurt its bottom line, what is irritating? Or does it feel uncomfortable for other reasons?
This reminds me of the first time I heard a coworker say, I wish I can go back to the good old days. And she kept saying this over and over again. I finally replied in frustration, what good old days? A time when women didn't have the right to vote? The time when black people were looked upon as second class citizen? The time when native Americans were driven off their lands? She told me, and I will never forget, that all those times were great times for her and I should stop making her feel bad just because it may not have been for me. Then she cries to management and management wanted me to apologize. Why? Because she was uncomfortable with the truth?
I believe I stated that Apple clearly had the right to remove whichever games it chooses from the App Store. What is irritating about that is the kneejerk, ill-thought-out reaction to whitewash everything. It is poorly considered. That one man recently used a Confederate battle flag to support his twisted beliefs does not make all depictions of them racist. Showing what actually happened in history is not racist. A game about this Civil War will of course show a Confederate flag. Just like games about Roman wars will show Roman Eagle standards. Just like a game about World War II will show Nazi flags. Unless Apple has simultaneoulsy removed all World War II games because of Nazi flags (which they haven't), then this is clearly just a reactionary move made out of political correctness, not thought.
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http://toucharcade.com/2015/06/25/apple-removes-confederate-flag/
Apple has removed all Civil War based games from the App store because the Confederate battle flag might be shown in them.
It's one thing to remove the flag from government property. But removing games because they're historically accurate?
Obviously Apple has this right, but this is exactly the kind of knee-jerk blanket condemnation without thought that some people have been concerned about. I personally agree the battle flag should not be flown on government property but this kind of thing with even games being taken down by companies really irritates me.
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My 6 year old daughter and I saw it today. She's never been as especially sensitive kid, but lately she's been worrying over death and the idea of losing a parent. (Because she's now mature enough to understand that my mom is dead and what that means.) She burst into tears at least 5 or 6 times during the movie. I cried some too.
I agree with others that it was somewhat tedious even though it did a good job portraying the workings of the brain. But I told my husband it wasn't one we needed to see again or that he would really enjoy.
I really enjoyed the Lava short at the beginning. But I love music and it had the feeling of a cultural myth. I have no idea if it actually might be though.
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Who else was guilty, the slaves?
Many countries have repudiated their slave-owning pasts through dictate, popular movement, and other means of changing the law and making amends. Including the North.
The South had to be razed to the ground to stop and never seems to have repudiated the past.
Be sorry for evil.
As I tell my kids when they do wrong, "You feel bad now because you did a bad thing. You are SUPPOSED to feel bad. I don't feel sorry for you because you are supposed to be upset when you hurt others!" So some people in the South feel bad because some people in their family did bad? That is not an excuse to get on the denial train. It's a reason to make amends and do better!
I have no sympathy for people who have a hard time feeling like their ancestors weren't perfect. Poor them.
How about feeling like your ancestors or your mom was killed? Do they really think that feels better?
This denial is absolutely gross and prevents social growth in so many ways.
There were Northern states that still practiced slavery until the Thirteenth Amendment was passed in late 1865, after the end of the Civil War. The last Confederate general surrendered in June 1865, but the amendment wasn't official until December 1865. Slavery continued in some parts of the Union, including Northern states, until that time.
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When I have time, I work out the tangles slowly from the bottom up, but if my daughter wakes up with tangles in the morning, I don't have 20 minutes to carefully comb through tangles. When that happens, my daughter screams like she's going to die. I was tender-headed when young too, so I understand, but it's stressful.
I've found that the best way to avoid that terrible mats of tangles is to brush and braid before bed, and then brush and braid, or at least ponytail it, in the morning. If I leave her hair down when she goes to school, I have to brush it that night before bed and the tangles are usually pretty bad. If I go 24 hours without brushing her hair, it's terrible.
If you don't know how to french braid, my cheat for that is to put the hair in a ponytail and do a simple braid of the ponytail. I'm a terrible braider. I've watched a bunch of videos on youtube to get better at it. And there are an amazing amount of cute styles of braiding that people have come up with that keep the braids from being boring for my daughter.
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When I was a kid Santa left our stockings in our bedrooms and we could go through stocking gifts until Mom and Dad woke up and told us we could come out to the living room. All gifts, including Santa gifts, were always wrapped. And we would only unwrap one gift, one person at a time. It took nearly all morning, but we got to see everything everyone got. Unwrapping the gifts was always half the fun.
My husband and I usually wake our daughter on Christmas (she is a sleep-in kid) and open stockings in bed. Then we go to the gifts under the tree after. And yes, Santa wraps. I just can't imagine not having wrapped gifts. Seeing all the stuff and not knowing what it is until it's unwrapped is half the fun for our daughter.
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On B&N's website, go to My Account. You should see all your orders there and can select farther back in time with the drop down menu. On each order for your ebooks, on the right side it will say if the book is available in your "NOOK library." If it says it is there, you can go to the Library and tell it to download the book again.
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Definitely get it changed.
My social security number was changed at my adoption at 14. I've never run into a single problem from having a new SSN. The only effect it has ever had on me is that I was the very last person is basic training to throw my live grenades because they tracked us by SSN. :)
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I have PCOS too, and I was up to 90 pounds overweight. I've lost 40 of that so far. I do low carb a lot of the time, but I do not overly deprive myself. I cut out all grains most of the time because my body just can't handle them well. But I still eat my yogurt and have a small amount of fruit because that makes it easier for me to be sane. And my husband and I have frequent "cheat days" where we have something we've been craving and write it off. The weight has come off slowly and steadily for me so far.
Also, if you have PCOS, your hormones are most likely very out of whack. For me personally, I have a whole lot more testosterone than a woman would normally have. This makes it easier to gain muscle, and the more muscle you have, the more calories you burn. So I exercise nearly every day. To take advantage of this, do exercise that incorporate weights or your body's resistance, not just running. I'm not muscle bound or anything like women are often scared of because that takes extreme weightlifting. But I have some muscle and it helps my body burn off the carbs I do eat and I don't gain weight.
And if you haven't yet, have your thyroid tested. Mine is a little high and now that I'm getting that medicated, weight loss has been even easier and I have 10x more energy and motivation.
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My husband would get fired for using marijuana, so yes, it would be a deal breaker. So many jobs include drug testing these days that I think it is a bad choice for a lot of people. If, for whatever reason, firing was not an issue, I might be okay with the very rare recreational use (as in once a month rare) and not around our children. But if the user has a history of progression to worse drugs from marijuana, then it would be an absolute deal breaker. Some people have addictive tendencies, and when they do, you can't fool around. Some people may scoff at the idea that it is an "entry-level drug" but that's exactly what it may be for a person prone to addiction.
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I think it's so odd that we live in a time where we are legislating the legal rights of rapist fathers but yet there are HUGE common sense gaps in parental rights for fathers out there. The irony in that... you just have to laugh or you'd blow up Congress.
But this is exactly the reason that biological fathers of illegitimate children shouldn't have custody rights. Because if they automatically did, rapists would have custody of any offspring of the rape. Which would mean a woman would be forced to get an abortion if she didn't want to spend the rest of her life dropping her child off at her rapist's home.
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Of course, "Because I am the mom and I said to." is a perfectly acceptable reason. However, it rankles some children much more than others. I found that explaining to my child, "I don't always have time to explain why you need to do something, so please obey first and then ask why later and I will be okay with that," I gave several for instances, like if the phone was ringing or my pot was boiling over where I just needed her to obey and we would talk about it later. Some kids really need to know that mom is not just arbitrarily making rules and throwing her weight around. (some kids feel this way, and some parents do actually parent in this way.) Once my dd figured out that most of the time that mom really did have a good reason for most of the things that she asked, she slowed down a bit on the questioning/sneaking/trying to get round the rules.
Also, I learned that I needed to give CONCRETE answers for things. She had (and still does) a very hard time with "later" and "sometime we will do that". She needed "At 3 this afternoon" or "next week." If I didn't give a concrete answer, she tended to struggle with obedience because she needed something to look forward to. If she wasn't given a concrete time she'd disobey because she wondered if she would EVER get to do whatever.
WRT to the red...I totally get this. My dh was like this too. I don't know that he would have ever been content with someone telling him what to do, even if they were the most reasonable, laid back parent. My dd is like this too. I am starting to look for employment for her, because she needs more autonomy and I will try to provide it at a level that is equal to her maturity.
To the OP: You said that your dd responds differently to her father.
Maybe the issue isn't as much respect. Perhaps the types of things that her dad gives her direction on are things that don't matter to her. Perhaps she tests you more merely because she spends more time with you. Perhaps she is responding to him because she's not with him as much, In much the same way, my kids always behave better for other people than for me.
Try not to take it personally. We dealt with the same things with my oldest. She responded better to one parent than the other during childhood, but now as a teen the roles have swapped and I am not sure why.
As a child and especially as a teen, I absolutely hated when my parents said "because I said so" or "because I'm the mom and you're the child" when I asked a reason why there was a rule. A lot of the time I was very aware that there was no good reason for the rule, it was just because they wanted control or because they wanted convenience.
Because of this I always try to answer the "why?" questions from my daughter with real reasons. It helps teach her why we have certain rules. No, you can't have cookies for dinner because this isn't good for keeping your body healthy. No, you can't jump on the couch because you might fall and get hurt and because it ruins the furniture. This helps her reasoning abilities, it teaches her that we have rules and guidelines for a reason, and it helps show her that I can be trusted when the things I tell her turn out to be true later.
I also make sure that I say yes frequently enough that the no's aren't so painful. She gets treats fairly regularly, but always with limits. I let her play with my things like makeup or jewelry, but only with supervision. For a daughter fascinated with asking for your jewelry and then taking and hiding it later, make sure she has some of these feminine things for herself. My daughter has two necklaces that are just for her. Then when she sees me wearing mine, she can get hers and be just like mommy.
And I agree that following instructions from her father quickly when she doesn't do the same to you is mostly to do with being around you more. My daughter is the same way and my husband has commented on it to me. She tests me more because I am the one making and enforcing the most rules and making the most decisions on her questions. He is around less often so the relationship is slightly different and each interaction has more impact because of time. If she pushes him once in a day and he is firm, it is more influential than if she pushes you once in a day, because she will most likely have many more opportunities to push.
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I would have died with my ectopic pregnancy 6 years ago without modern medical care.
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Okay that makes sense.
But when the SC court legally gave Baby V. back to her bio-father which changed her domicile to OK again - wouldn't that give jurisdiction back to the OK court system instead of the SC court system? Or does the case stay in the SC court system since it was {I presume} an appeal on the part of the adoptive family?
I can easily forsee a situation happening where the SC court system says baby goes to adoptive family, and the OK court system says baby goes to Bio-dad. What happens then? Supreme court again?
Courts typically don't like to divide family court cases across jurisdictional bounds because it creates confusion and unnecessary complications. For example, if a mother and father shared custody of their children and one parent kidnaps the children to another state, the new state will usual send it back to the original jurisdiction because they know the history of the case. They do this so other states will recognize their jurisdiction in reverse.
Apparently, the father in Oklahoma says he won't give up the child unless Oklahoma courts tell him to do so. The Oklahoma court, when it sees him, may say that jurisdiction lies in South Carolina, or they may try to take over. If they do, politicians will likely get involved before the Supreme Court because it will become a states' rights issue.
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OK, when I quoted the US Supreme Court, I corrected the facts to say that he sent a text to the bio mom and that 4 months after the baby was born he signed an acceptance of service of notice of the adoption proceeding. An acceptance of service does not and cannot relinquish parental rights, nor can a text. Whether he believed he was giving up his rights or not is irrelevant; if he did not properly sign away his rights, then he did not give them up even if he thought he did.
But it doesn't matter if he didn't give up his rights. The Supreme Court stated that under the law in South Carolina, he wasn't legally able to object because he never had custody, and that the ICWA also didn't apply because he never had custody.
Also, this statement by the Supreme Court is key: "In sum, when, as here, the adoption of an Indian child is voluntarily and lawfully initiated by a non-Indian parent with sole custodial rights, the ICWA's primary goal of preventing the unwarranted removal of Indian children and the dissolution of Indian families is not implicated."
CDC removing mask mandate what will you do with dc under 12
in The Chat Board
Posted
I just said it. Open wounds. Foreign matter. Big difference from breathing in tiny particles.