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Care

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Posts posted by Care

  1. Oh, Rosie.  "I'm sorry" doesn't cover it, but there aren't any other words, are there?  I am so horrified to hear this, and have been thinking of you nearly every moment (not in the bathroom, though, I promise).  I know there is likely nothing at all I can do to help you, but if you can think of anything, no matter how small, please let me know.  And if you'll not be horribly offended, I'll check in on you another time to see if there is anything I can do.  I just wish I had the right words. Or the right powers.  I am so terribly sorry, and I wish you nothing but love and light, as impossible as that seems right now.  

  2. Depressingly, my local market carries... not much.  A lot of green tea (just "green tea"), a lot of orange pekoe... and not much else.  *sadface*  Plus, I'm horrible at making iced teas - I'm trying to cut out sugar, so I have no idea what I'm doing.  ^_^  No clue how strong to brew, no clue how much sugar to use if I'm not using kool-aid level sugar...  I'm lost!  It's pretty dang sad, honestly.  XD

  3. As summer is around the corner, and I'm trying to ditch soda/pop/whatever you call it, TELL ME YOUR FAVORITE TEAS!

     

    I have a David's Tea across town, and I think a TeaVana around as well, tell me what teas you like iced!

  4. Gah! I'm not getting email updates! Yikes, I'll have to fix that.

     

    I'll get started on my own post, as well. As Mrs.Warde here has pointed out to me elsewhere, I can also dabble in research, the heritable nature of giftedness, and the diagnostic process for SPD, if additional posts are needed. ^_^

     

    This looks to be timed just ahead of when I'm supposed to take Monkey for an extended-family camping trip, so it'll be a great thing! Also, just as an FYI, this blog hop from last year? Yeah, it was a HUGE help, and I made several new friends and a ton contacts in the arena of gifted education from it! THANK YOU ALL!!

  5. Thank you so much!

     

    I can never really tell what "normal" is - DS is an only, and the only kids we see on a regular basis are much like he is (though his best friend's mama is an astrophysicist, which is fairly indicative of what daughter is like!), so... I guess, and I never know! Thank you for the suggestions! I'll keep an eye to PBS - I only have it while I'm at my mom's, so I only have a couple days to check it out, though I suspect that it'll be much like Sprout is... Maybe I'll go to the PBS website and check the lineup, then I can see what shows are airing when, and check out individual episodes at home... Why, yes, I am an overthinker!

     

    I have no idea how many words are in DS's vocabulary. No clue. He had 5 words at 18 months, and hit 75 by 22months, then I stopped counting. I know he knows a lot of words, and uses them. All. Frequently, rapidly, and loudly. All day long. :tongue_smilie: Aside from that, though, I haven't counted. ^_^

     

    I will take a look at the more "normal" places for the kids to gather, and watch for PBS shows (he loves Sprout, though none of it teaches him anything, nor does the Spider-Man he adores), see what shakes out. Thank you so much for replying!

  6. Good evening, all!

     

    I have a question regarding filling in some information on paperwork, I'm hoping someone can help me out.

     

    I've gotten the fifty-two bajillion forms from the Gifted Development Center, and have begun filling them out. However, it asks if a) my son's vocabulary is advanced, and b) examples of this. Thing is, DS is my only child. I don't know what's normal for a child his age and what isn't, so I can't well say whether his vocabulary is truly advanced, or merely a product of what those of us around him speak daily. I'm running on the assumption (for now) that his vocabulary is advanced, as he has yet to use words he doesn't know, and has shocked the bejeebers out of me using words like "inquisition" appropriately in sentences. I'm just not sure how to answer the question, and am hoping folks here can point me true.

     

    Thanks so much (and feel free to ask questions if I've left out details that you need!) for your time, I really appreciate it!!

  7. I'm going to agree with Fairfarmhand. Her suggestion for pre-visit instruction from your daughter is going to likely be the best way to handle this without too much turbulence.

     

    I have a WILDLY different parenting style from my mother. My mother believes that, at two, my son should have structured playtime, and that every moment he is awake, I should be entertaining him. This includes while I'm cooking and/or cleaning, and when I have to use the bathroom. Playpens, swings, and jolly jumpers are perfect child-monitoring and safety systems, to be used whenever necessary. She believes in bedtime at eight, and waking up with the birdies in the morning, just to do it all again.

     

    I, on the other hand, think that some time for my son to explore his environment (and the freedom to do it) is a good thing. So, while we have time we play together, when I need to cook (particularly since our oven is so incredibly old that it gets as hot on the outside as it does on the inside and I have to gate myself in the kitchen to use it!), have to pee, or need to just decompress for a minute, he plays with his toys. I have made the house as safe for him as I can, and we both survive and thrive this way.

     

    Visiting my mother, though... while she is willing to say I must be doing SOMETHING right, as my child is sweet, kind, and independent, she can never seem to FIND that something while we're there. I am more active in parenting at their house, knowing it is not as toddler-proof as my own. But my not actively supervising his every waking moment stresses her out. Her comment at the time was that SOMEONE needed to parent my child, as I obviously wasn't. I told her flat out she'd HAD her chance to raise kids, and I was raising mine, thanks, took my son and left. Why? A) Because my son doesn't need the toxicity that comes from two grown adults fuming at each other and trapped in the same house together, B) because I seriously needed to get away before I told my mother exactly where to get off, and C) I know myself well enough to know that staying would only make things worse. As we were visiting from out of the country at the time, there wasn't far to go, but we did have other plans for the day, so we kept them. After a while, when we'd both cooled off, we were able to have a discussion that boiled down to almost EXACTLY what Fairfarmhand proposed. Boy, would I have preferred to have that discussion BEFORE the screaming that I neglect my son because I do not feel the need to entertain him every moment.

  8. I'm an LC and a retired LLL Leader & both my kids were nursed way past 2 years. I vote keep going.

     

    have a baby moon, YOU Drink lots of fluids & take baby to bed & nurse frequently. Don't forget to nurse at night - that can really improve supply & babies who are busy during the day need to catch up on nursing at night.

     

    Since YOU have allergies, your baby may be more predisposed to developing allergies. If nothing else that would keep me breastfeeding this baby as it does reduce allergies.

     

    I would not supplement with formula at this age. This baby can have age appropriate solids & breastmilk.

     

    :iagree:

     

    Backstory: My son, at two months old, wasn't gaining. We spent a week in the hospital with the doctors telling me all sorts of untrue things re: breastfeeding, and actually *forbidding* me to BF, only what could be pumped (which was .5z per session, if I was lucky)... That sort of thing. I fought tooth and nail to keep giving my baby breastmilk. There were days that nursing my son was what kept me sane and, quite literally, alive. Visiting Dr. Jack in Toronto said the exact same things I-can't-remember-who did - your baby will be just fine on nursing and solid foods. We, at about 4 months, were mixing up purees, and feeding the baby those, plus nursing. We supplemented overnight, as we also had issues with CAS involvement (for a separate reason, but still). My sweet son will be two in a month. He still nurses, though usually only for nap and night times.

     

    Answer: My personal opinion is that my baby will be small for only a short time, and once that time is up, I can't go back. I am willing to put every last bit of effort I have into nursing. It is the one thing that I, and only I, can do for my son, and I won't always be able to.

     

    The not TL;DR version: I already have fought as hard as I possibly could to continue nursing my own son. I don't think my fight would have changed had he been three months older when we hit troubles. :001_smile:

  9. I'm likely not saying anything new, but YES. Get/take the drug, particularly if it will improve your quality of life. If you go back to the useless doctors (I'd be inclined to not, and find someone new), tell them you're on this med. You don't have to tell them why or how or from whom you got it, just that you're taking it. I'd just be worried about interactions with current/future meds if you don't disclose it... though truthfully you'd be better off at that point just telling your pharmacist and letting them handle it. Of course, I have rotten experiences with doctors prescribing things that their patient actually cannot have.

  10. I'm assuming here that you're asking because the photographs are heavily inappropriate, and not just questionable (e.g. criminal content versus just baby-in-bathtub). If that is the case, absolutely report it. Sure, the finances stink for the people involved, but if these pictures are what I'm assuming you mean, the potential downside for this child is far worse. Also, as Pamela said, the *action* causes the consequence, not the telling of the action. Call the local PD, ask their opinion, and proceed from there.

     

    If we're talking some questionable photos... give some thought to whether or not these parents ought to lose their kids over these photos. If the answer is yes, then see above. :001_smile:

  11. So is the recommendation to wash hair every day? Seriously my hair would never dry if I did that. I have very thick, very heavy hair and it takes over a day to dry when I have it up...which is all the time because it is summer. I can't leave it down I would spontaneously combust.

     

    I thought of doing to olive oil...didn't know about the baking soda but worth a try.

     

    What a PITA!

     

    I wash my hair about every other day, or every third, depending on whether or not it needs it - I, like you, have such thick hair that if I wash it daily, I'll be wet all the dang time.

     

    The baking soda acts as a mild abrasive - it scrubs the flakes off gently without scraping too hard - salt or sugar scrubs operate on the same principle, but they're too harsh for me, personally. :001_smile:

  12. I have the same problem. It started on my nose, then spread to hairline, then to my eyebrows, and then I finally saw a dermatologist about it. In infants, they call it cradle cap. Seborrhic Dermatitis. I have found that Selsun Blue helps sometimes, but usually if I want it to go and stay gone, I have to wash my face and hairline with olive oil and a bit of baking soda (that is to say, put a pinch of baking soda in your palm, cover with olive oil, mix and rub on), then rinse, and wash my hair afterward with either a medicated shampoo (just in case) or a regular - either will strip the oils. In my case, it's oil glands gone awry - they keep generating more and more oil, needed or no, and the sloughed off skin sticks even though it should just flake away.

  13. Just a question, how do you keep a child from unbuckling themselves? My 3 yo dd is in a 5-point harness but she knows how to unbuckle and she does it incessantly. I pull over and buckle her up, etc. but it's just not working.

     

    A friend of mine has the same problem - she made a little snap-shut cover for both the lap lock and the chest clip - the kids aren't able to unbuckle the snap, and so the clip stays locked. Extra step, but it keeps the kiddo in the 5-point. As I understand it, the cover is simply a piece of flannel that snaps closed over the chest clip (with a snap on each side) or around the lap-lock (angled so there is no cut in the fabric, and also two snaps).

     

    Mercifully I haven't had to deal with that one myself - yet. My DS is RF and will be for as long as he can be - he's going to outgrow his seat by height well before he does by weight. His cousin, on the other hand, was in a bucket until his 1st birthday (despite outgrowing it), and went straight to a FF seat as a "present." I twitch every time I see him get into the car.

  14. FWIW, when I went through premarital counseling, the priest met with both my fiancé (fiancée?) and I separately. Had either of us expressed any doubt to the priest, he would have declined to perform the ceremony - and that would have "stuck" across the church. No reason given publicly, simply 'no, I'm sorry, you cannot be married in this church.' While that may not be enough to deter the mother, knowing her child can't be married in the church... if she's sticking really hard on the 'living in sin' aspect of their unmarried state, it may be enough to buy the son some time to either grow a backbone and stick up for himself, for the two to have a monster blowout and not be dating anymore anyhow, or for him to actually be ready to get married.

  15. Worth noting, I don't dig the wifely/submissive thing at all for myself. I just consider it fair distribution of labor. If DH has to be out of the house all day to keep us financially afloat, the least I can do is try to keep things together at home so we can *all* find the clothes, shoes, pens, toys, paper, salt, or whatever it is we need at the moment.

     

    I started with FlyLady when I first got my own place. Fell off of that wagon within a month. Have tried to get back on, and it just never stuck. Now... Well, now I keep the place so we have a vague notion of where stuff is, and we can move around. If I'm particularly paranoid that my MIL is going to have another bout of crazy, or if my mother is coming to visit, cleaning is done top-to-bottom over the course of a week, every room in the house, every item in its place, every piece of clothing washed, folded, and put away. For whatever reason, I just can't seem to keep it together enough to *maintain* that, and that's what I'm hoping to find. :blush:

  16. It's not the physical act of laundry or cleaning. I can do those. I did learn how to wash clothes, clean a toilet, mop the kitchen floor, etc. What I did NOT learn was how to do these things on a regular schedule. Everything was done in a frenzy, which is a stressful way to live. My mother had many, many talents. Home management was not one of them.

     

    If it's not a struggle for you, you're not going to get it. It's kind of ironic that you mention "read a book". That's exactly what we're talking about here. And just because a book wasn't helpful to you doesn't mean it's not going to be helpful to someone else.

     

    As for the men, my DH works hard. He has a full-time job. He does contract work on the side and help his parents with their homes as they age. He handles all the yard work (does it himself, not hired out) and car maintenance. I need to carry my share of the load, and I'm not.

     

    Same here, actually. My DH doesn't have a great job or a complex job or whatever, but he puts in four 10 hour days to keep us in food and shelter. I'd like to be able to hold up my end of the bargain and keep the house in somewhat livable condition.

     

    As it stands, much like everyone else, I can cook. I can clean. I can mop, wash toilets, do laundry, dust, and whatever else needs to be done. I'm fully capable of these things. What I'm missing is a sens of how to make it happen in concert. I understand that if I don't do laundry, we have no clean clothes. But it's what I need to do to get into a groove to make sure that we have clean clothes, that I remember to thaw things for dinner, that the house gets vacuumed more often now that our son is crushing cereal into the carpeting... That is a skill I'm lacking. And so I'm watching this thread, hoping someone has some insights that I haven't seen before. Not lamenting that woe is me, my neat freak mother didn't instill a love of cleaning in me (I am *so* my father's daughter!), but instead looking for ways to improve myself, and to try to gain skills I just don't have, and was never taught - no matter how many semesters of Home Ec I took, or how wonderful, organized and tidy my mother is.

  17. Re: the actual stroller question...

     

    I don't have a suggestion on totally lightweight, easy to maneuver anywhere... but I have a bike trailer. It has a jogging stroller attachment, and that's what I use. I wouldn't say anything, except that I was pushing my toddler AND a 6yo in there at the zoo without so much as an "oof, you guys are heavy!" So, while it's not the most practical thing ever, it has been a fabulous thing for us - and will hold two kids no problem, so if that's ever a 'thing'... Yeah.

     

    Okay, !ramble.

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