Are you ever surprised by the things that come out of your mouth as a mom?

[mazakaal]

I remember when the kids were younger, I would think how strange it was to be saying things like, "You may not sniff Jello up your nose." Now I can't believe how knowledgable I am about tides and waves. I spoke with ds on the phone this morning. He's on his way back from Ireland and asked how the waves are here. I actually was able to give an answer. "It's flat right now, but the wind is off-shore and it's high tide. By the time of your surf training this afternoon, it will be the incoming push, so you may get some waves." I feel like the words must not be coming from me. :001_huh:

[SherryTX]

I remember when the kids were younger, I would think how strange it was to be saying things like, "You may not sniff Jello up your nose." Now I can't believe how knowledgable I am about tides and waves. I spoke with ds on the phone this morning. He's on his way back from Ireland and asked how the waves are here. I actually was able to give an answer. "It's flat right now, but the wind is off-shore and it's high tide. By the time of your surf training this afternoon, it will be the incoming push, so you may get some waves." I feel like the words must not be coming from me. :001_huh:

 

That is actually pretty cool haha.

I guess "don't you ever put a bead up your nose again!" after the emergency room visit for Olivia when she was 4 - and then a YEAR later "you just lost your savings because you have to help pay for having yet ANOTHER bead removed from your nose" to Olivia. (We warned her about this - she had $20 saved up, and when I went to pay the bill - $250 - I told her she had to help pay because she knew better and did it anyway.)

[Snickerdoodle]

:lol:

[Karen sn]

I told her she had to help pay because she knew better and did it anyway.)

 

Good for you.

4 can be pretty smart.

My once almost 3 yo stuck a raisen up her nose.

It was grape by the times we got it out a few hours later.

 

I have heard of things rotting in the nose.

Ewwwww. I can't even imagine the smell.

Thinking about it makes me shiver.

[MamaT]

When my Olivia was a toddler, she swallowed some change. The pediatriciann told us to check her poop diapers to see if she had passed it. EEW.

 

I remember saying to my 13yo son, "Remember to check the poop for change," and then thinking that was such a weird thing to be saying!:001_smile:

[Karen sn]

"Remember to check the poop for change,"

 

that is funny.

[Jennifer in NH]

well, yes...recently (last week) out of my mouth came the following, " Matthew..we do not pee in the trash can". He is recently potty trained, and thought it looked lke a good place to go... at least it wasn't a shoe.

[LaxMom]

Oh, yes. "Something smells... come here and let me look in your pants" was never part of my conversation before having children. And, "we do NOT poop in the yard!" I seem to have an inordinate number of conversations about poop. :001_huh:

[OH Kim]

"I do not want to ever hear 'she stole my toe jam' from anyone ever again" came out of my mouth and went down in history.

 

Then there's the ever favorite "she took my lint."

 

I thought sounding like my mom was bad enough.

Edited May 11, 2009 by OH Kim
punctuation again

[sixpence1978]

I agree. We've have multiple instances of "Get your head out of the toilet".

[Tree House Academy]

Honey...when daddy pees outside, it is NOT the same as the sprinkler that we run through! (this to my then 2.5 year old when dad tried to help with the potty training by showing him how men go potty outside. Needless to say, dh was spinning in circles and peeing on his own shoe trying to keep my little one from running through it.)

 

Now, it seems that what I say most is, "Get off the cat. Kitties don't like to be laid on. And look, now you are covered in cat fur." or "Please do not try to ride the dog. He is a small cocker spaniel and not meant for riding." Or, my favorite, "why did the cat puke on the clothes in your laundry basket??? BECAUSE YOU LOCKED HER IN THE CLOSET!!!!" :(

[swellmomma]

Well the newest strange thing to come out of my mouth was Friday when I had to say to babygirl "We do not tickle the cat!" I happened to be on the phone with my mom and she was cracking up over it.

[myfunnybunch]

"Please DO NOT golf the peas out of your soup."

 

My ds was using his spoon to golf the peas across the table.

 

He doesn't like peas.

 

Cat

[Sahamamama]

I remember when the kids were younger, I would think how strange it was to be saying things like, "You may not sniff Jello up your nose." Now I can't believe how knowledgable I am about tides and waves. I spoke with ds on the phone this morning. He's on his way back from Ireland and asked how the waves are here. I actually was able to give an answer. "It's flat right now, but the wind is off-shore and it's high tide. By the time of your surf training this afternoon, it will be the incoming push, so you may get some waves." I feel like the words must not be coming from me. :001_huh:

 

That is hilarious. It must feel surreal to you, to be saying this.

 

And I LOVE the Jello comment (see my sig line for the reason why). ;)

[Sahamamama]

My once almost 3 yo stuck a raisin up her nose.

It was grape by the time we got it out.

 

I. am. falling. over.

 

That laugh just made my day. My husband came in from the kitchen to see what I was howling about.... :lol:

[Mommy22alyns]

"No naked gymnastics!" :001_huh:

[*Inna*]

"We squish only peoples' backs, not their heads!" :001_huh:

The kids were playing a "pile-up game" on our bed.

[Desert Rat]

My favorite is "No levers at the table" to the 4 yo making a catapult out of his fork and spoon. Also a favorite...."you must wear underwear at the table if you want to be fed" to same 4yo who went through a, um, naked phase.

[hillfarm]

My best recently was, "No, you may not have a machete for Easter, maybe for your birthday in a few months..." to my 10 yo dd.

[clarkacademy]

I think out of all the things I have said the whole " we do not paint the floor with paenut butter at 3 am " screeched at the top of my lungs was the wildest.