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I can't think of how to set a poll up for this, but I am curious to see answers. Does your DH play video games? If so, how much? And if you don't mind sharing, how old is he?

 

My husband has zero interest in video games. Several times he has expressed surprise that anyone in his 30s or 40s would be playing video games. I am a little younger than DH (seven years younger) but also went to college before the age when kids brought video games to college. I don't remember ever seeing anyone play a video game when I was in college (1985 - 1989). So DH and I just grew up before that was really on the radar.

 

Anyway, I expect there is a generation thing going on here ....

 

If your DH plays, do you play with him? Do you enjoy it?

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Mainly lurker here, but yes DH plays he is 31 turning 32 in a few months. He enjoys roleplaying and strategy games mainly, but plays many other types of games as well. I also play at 30 turning 31 in a few days *grin*. I have played video games since long before I met DH though, my Dad was a computer gamer and I played them a lot as well when I was young and as I've grown up. I also mainly play roleplaying and strategy games with a large mix of casual games in there as well. We have actually switched to mainly console gaming rather then computer gaming in the past few years since we've had DS, since it is much easier to play a console game for short periods of time then a computer game.

 

DH probably plays about 3 to 5 nights a week for maybe an hour or two a night. I probably play about the same, more when I have to be in bed with an infant for them to not wake up *grin*, since we don't watch tv at our house, it is basically what would be considered our tv time.

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I can't think of how to set a poll up for this, but I am curious to see answers. Does your DH play video games? If so, how much? And if you don't mind sharing, how old is he?

 

My husband has zero interest in video games. Several times he has expressed surprise that anyone in his 30s or 40s would be playing video games. I am a little younger than DH (seven years younger) but also went to college before the age when kids brought video games to college. I don't remember ever seeing anyone play a video game when I was in college (1985 - 1989). So DH and I just grew up before that was really on the radar.

 

Anyway, I expect there is a generation thing going on here ....

 

If your DH plays, do you play with him? Do you enjoy it?

 

We both play (World of Warcraft) - although dh generally plays more than I do. He likes computers, electronics, his Iphone, all the applications he can download and the Wii (he's very technology oriented and that's his career field, too). I really don't have much interest in any other games besides WOW, and much of that pertains to the social aspect of it (we belong to a Christian-led, family friendly guild). Oh, and he's 37.

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no, my husband does not play video games. He understands the lure of them, and used to be pretty into them when we were in high school and college. He says now that he just has too much to do, having a family and doesn't want to waste his time getting caught up with it. I really respect him for that.

 

He does once in a while sit down and play mario cart on the wii with the kids, or even a little while playing something with our son, but he prefers to be working around the house/yard, doing stuff with us.

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Does your DH play video games?

 

No, and for that I'm grateful. We're a good team in that sense.

 

My husband has zero interest in video games. Several times he has expressed surprise that anyone in his 30s or 40s would be playing video games.

 

I'm surprised, too. I don't know any men (or women), regardless of their age, who regularly play video games.

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Neither dh nor I do. Every now and then I'll play a song on Guitar Hero or Rock Band with the boys (they get a kick out of it), and every now and then dh and I will try one of the Wii Fit games. Maybe once a month, for Wii for us (and that lasts all of 10 minutes, if that).

 

As for regular video games, we wouldn't have a clue how to play them, and have absolutely zero interest in doing so.

 

Ria

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My husband has absolutely no interest in video games or anything computer related unless it is for work.

A couple of months ago, he did play Madden football with our boys and a pack of their cousins. He only played for 20 minutes or so, and told our boys afterward that the next time they want him to play a game with them he'd prefer they pull out a board game.

 

I do know a few adults who regularly play video games, but I fail to see what keeps them interested.

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Dh just turned 30 in Jan, & he would play video games, but he feels that they are a source of addiction & that the Lord has led him to stay away from them. This has only been true in the last 5 yrs or so, & I have to say, it has been a real blessing.

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I replied in that other thread - dh lives and breathes video games. :tongue_smilie:

 

He's got a ps2, ps3, DS, and - as of today, though he doesn't know yet, a PSP. That part sorta answers the other question as to age - today is his 36th birthday and that's what I got for him. Yep, I'm a video game enabler. :lol:

 

( He doesn't play at all on the computer though - we never had one suitable for really good game play. Just as well - the computer is mine mine mine. :D)

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Nope. He never has. I enjoyed Guitar Hero when it first came out and tried to get him to play some, but he was never interested. He's 47, I'm 42.

 

Our DS10 has a Wii with 3 of the Guitar Hero games, the Lego Star Wars game, and I'm not sure what else. He was into it for a while and now I can't remember the last time the thing was turned on.

 

I"m editing to say, "I'M ONLY 41! My birthday isn't for two weeks yet! I'M ONLY 41!"

Edited by Amy loves Bud
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My dh is 39 yrs. He plays Scrabble on line occassionally when the kids are asleep. He also plays Bejeweled but not very often.

Most of the time he is interacting with famiily and doing work at home. He may give himself 20 minutes twice a week at the most. I know he does not crave it more, addictions seem to be easily avoided by him. We don't even have cable so that is his only screen time aside from work, unless we watch a movie together. He is a work horse!

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Dh has never played a video game. He's out the door around 6:00 am and back home around 5:30 pm. I don't think the games would interest him much.

 

Decades ago I played Mario Brothers and was very bad at that. Horrible! I don't have much interest playing nowadays.

 

Ds has a Wii which he's allowed to play Friday after school until Sunday, an hour each day. He doesn't play that often, but I don't mind a little.

Edited by MBM
Greenin' up my text.
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He played Super Mario Sunshine until he completed the game. He'll play Mario Kart or Super Mario Galaxy with the kids occasionally. He probably plays once every couple of months. He has no interest in violent video games.

 

As a teen, he spent his fair share of quarters at the video game arcade. :)

 

Should also say, since others have mentioned this - DH is a computer programmer and has been a sys admin in the past (he prefers programming). He loves technology, but would rather play his double bass in his spare time, rather than get involved in gaming.

Edited by Rhonda in TX
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Dh likes video games but only in a group setting. He's not one to play alone (I enjoy playing but don't do it that often because I would usually rather read in my spare time). We have a lot of friends that enjoy playing too and will sometimes get together for little tournaments. We have had 8 people playing at once on two tv screens and two games consoles. It's great fun! :D

 

Oh, and dh is 35 next month.

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My dh is 40yo and does not play video games and thinks it is ridiculous for a grown man to spend hours playing a video game. I tend to agree. I've read those posts by women who are frustrated at how many hours their dh plays computer or video games and I just cannot comprehend it. I would take a sledgehammer to the computer/video game console before I would let it ruin my marriage. YMMV.

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My husband is in his late 30's and plays video games regularly. Usually after the kids go to bed he'll play a game and I'll read a book, unless we have a movie to watch together. I'd say he spends an hour a night playing. I think it is great that he has an activity that he enjoys and engages him after a day of work- I never feel that it interferes with our family life.

 

But we don't watch tv in our house often, less than 3 hours in a week. So this is his "screen time".

 

Lately dh and ds10 have been working on programming their own games. Dh believes the earlier to learn programming, the better. I'm amazed at some of the things they are able to create.

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Yes, my dh plays video games. He does more in a week than most men do in a month. He works long hours, is a scoutmaster, is remodeling our kitchen, works in the yard, teaches the kids all the handy things he does, just taught himself how to cook his favorite Thai and Indian dishes, and romanced me happily back into our marriage. He plays games with our kids sometimes or on his own just to decompress.

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My dh is 40yo and does not play video games and thinks it is ridiculous for a grown man to spend hours playing a video game. I tend to agree. I've read those posts by women who are frustrated at how many hours their dh plays computer or video games and I just cannot comprehend it. I would take a sledgehammer to the computer/video game console before I would let it ruin my marriage. YMMV.

 

:iagree: Exactly, even down to the age.

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yes, he is 35 and about 2 evenings a week he'll play for an hour or so.

 

but I'll go further and say that his dad (56) and his grandfather (74) also play and what's more, they play MORE than he does. they have PSPs and DS and playstations and thoroughly enjoy them.

 

his grandfather comes over, pulls my rolling desk chair over to the middle of the living room to sit in and plays the Wii with my kids. It's hilarious!:lol:

 

I really enjoy the Wii in the living room because I'm not just sitting there and it's very interactive.

 

The Xbox in the bedroom (so we can download netflix movies for US to watch - nothing X like, but something above a G rating, kwim?) is less engaging for me. Dh tries to get me to play games with him, but he is way too competitive for me and the games too involved. I just can't get "into" most of them like he can.

 

I played Settlers of Catan the other night at 3 am with 3 others (online) while nursing the baby though and that was interesting. 2 were also nursing their babies and 1 was a dad rocking a sick little one. I've never gamed online, much less via Xbox before and I found the situation completely weird. :tongue_smilie:

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My dh is 25 and grew up without video games in his home. When he went to college, he played a bit, because that was how most guys "bonded" in his dorm. He however, was taking 21 credits and working 25 hours a week and didn't have much time for anything else, especially after we started dating!

 

Now, he actually owns a PS3, Wii, and XBox (plus several "vintage" systems) but he rarely plays them. He has so many hobbies and interests that video games usually don't make the list. Every once in a while he'll get on a kick and play a game a few times a week, then he'll quit for a few months.

 

I personally don't think there is anything wrong with a "grown man" playing video games. I think EXCESS is the problem. Video games in excess may be a problem now, but they're no more childish or destructive than the behaviors of men in my father's generation: following a sports team obsessively, watching TV constantly, spending more time with "the guys" than the kids, etc.

 

I remember a preacher once mocking those of us who read John Grisham novels as wasting valuable time. I managed not to snort aloud when he later talked about how much time he spent golfing that week. We all have our "pointless" diversions, and as long as they aren't excessive, immoral, illegal, or fattening (as Dr. Laura says), I think personal preferences are ok.

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My DH is 52 and I'm 41. I play video games i.e. Nintendo and I play World of Warcraft online. My DH is a numbers/words guy. He plays Diplomacy online and lots & lots of sudoku puzzles. He also enjoys some of the games at GSN.com and Webkinz! :)

 

My DH either has his laptop on his lap or a book in his hand. He isn't into sports or outside stuff. Thank goodness! cause neither am I.

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I do know a few adults who regularly play video games, but I fail to see what keeps them interested.

 

As opposed to...? Just curious. I'm rather surprised at some of the responses that seem to imply that there is something wrong with adults who like to play video games. What should we be doing with our free time?

 

Cleaning house? -- my house is relatively clean but I don't scrub at it every day.

Reading books? -- we both read alot but we get bored if we read more than 4 or 5 hours a day.

Gardening? -- yuck! I fail to see why playing in the dirt is considered to be an okay grownup hobby.

Working on the car? -- we have a mechanic

Sewing? -- way too boring. I just can't sit still that long and focus on such minute details.

Watching tv? -- with all the channels we have, there are very little interesting programs.

Cooking? -- if I had a large family, I guess this might consume some of my time but I truly spend very little time in the kitchen and I have no desire to bake goodies that would get us all fat.

 

Even with homeschooling the kids, I'd say I have a good 6 hours a day of absolute down time. Usually more. I nap for 2 - 3 hours in the middle of the day sometimes to fill that emptiness. But there just isn't anything else I'd rather be doing. DH and I fairly boring people. We were the nerds in school. :)

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My husband and I both used to play video games (he got me hooked). He doesn't anymore, but I think that's only because he's working a lot, he would probably still play if he had the time. Right now he chooses the family over video games in his small bit of spare time. I think he hasn't touched a game in over a year, maybe longer.

 

He's 43.

 

 

Edit: I just remembered, he does occasionally play, but it's a group game with the kids. It's been a few months since he's had the time to though.

Edited by Dawn in OH
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I personally don't think there is anything wrong with a "grown man" playing video games. I think EXCESS is the problem. Video games in excess may be a problem now, but they're no more childish or destructive than the behaviors of men in my father's generation: following a sports team obsessively, watching TV constantly, spending more time with "the guys" than the kids, etc.

 

I remember a preacher once mocking those of us who read John Grisham novels as wasting valuable time. I managed not to snort aloud when he later talked about how much time he spent golfing that week. We all have our "pointless" diversions, and as long as they aren't excessive, immoral, illegal, or fattening (as Dr. Laura says), I think personal preferences are ok.

 

Agree

 

My Dh (age 36) plays video games of some sort every day (almost exclusively computer based games). Sometimes it's just solitaire and often it's Age of Empires of some other strategy game. There several times this would occur: a) It's his favorite way to unwind after work b) He often has to work from home on his computer and will play the game while it's loading c) He and my son play together and he plays against his best friend in NY and sometimes plays spades with my father. He rarely goes more than 30 minutes except when he's doing a group play (and he always checks my schedule before scheduling a game).

 

He doesn't drink, smoke, do drugs, cheat, go to topless bars, download porn, spend money on the latest gadgets, watch sports 24/7, gamble, spend all weekend golfing with his friends, etc. He's never once hit me and he tries real hard to not raise his voice to me (and as a redheaded former Marine, I'm the provoking type lol).

 

He's an involved father who coaches his son's sports teams (and the kids and parents adore him), helps out with scouts, helps with homeschooling, teaches computer classes (like A+ certification prep, networking, etc) for free to help people who need to upgrade skills to get a job, he donates a lot of time to charities, does family game night, and he's never farted in front of me in the 12 years I have known him lol.

 

Really, my only complaints are that he is lazy/stubborn about helping out around the house/yard and that is a direct result of growing up with an OCD mother so he's still working out the rebellious issues and he hates broccoli, peas, and squashes (also related to his mom forcing him to eat them). Neither of these issues would go away if he stopped playing games.

 

I am 40 and I don't care for long involved games but I do play sudoku, text twist, mah johnng or zuma almost daily to unwind. Being female, I prefer chatting with my dearest friend.

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My dh is 38, and *gasp* he's playing a video game right now. smiley-shocked034.gif I still think he's pretty cool, though. :D

 

He doesn't play very often, as he just doesn't have the time. Sometimes we play something together like Wii tennis or Mario Party. I enjoy video games, too, but rarely have the time to partake. If someone would take these munchkins off my hands and do all the housework for me, I could see myself playing Animal Crossing or Harvest Moon all day. smiley-whacky059.gif Okay, not really. But it would be kinda tempting. :tongue_smilie:

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I'm rather surprised at some of the responses that seem to imply that there is something wrong with adults who like to play video games.

 

Same. I don't run around judging other people's hobbies - we're all wired differently (thank heavens) and enjoy different things in our spare time.

 

I happen to love my video-game-nut of husband just the way he is. :D

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My dh is 38, and *gasp* he's playing a video game right now. smiley-shocked034.gif

 

So is mine - right beside me on the couch, playing Need For Speed Underground on his ps2 :D

 

I gave him his PSP earlier (it's his 36th birthday today) and he's impatiently waiting for that to charge. :tongue_smilie:

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So is mine - right beside me on the couch, playing Need For Speed Underground on his ps2 :D

 

I gave him his PSP earlier (it's his 36th birthday today) and he's impatiently waiting for that to charge. :tongue_smilie:

 

I gave my dh a psp for Christmas. :D

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Well, that is something I don't have in my life. I'd gladly give up my video games if I could have some IRL friends.

 

Well -I am mostly chatting online lol. I prefer IM to telephones because

a) I have a hearing problem

b) I can multi-task better

c) My dearest online friend and I have an ongoing 24/7 conversation (Hi C! -I know you're reading this thread lol). It may be hours between comments but it's always up and running.

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Guest Katia

Yes, my dh plays video games. He is 53 yo. And he loves them!

 

He plays solitaire many times every day. It is rare that you see him without his laptop on his lap. And just tonight he played Wii Fit, Wii Golf and Wii Tennis. He asked me to play Wii Bowling with him (which I love to do BTW) but I was in the middle of making homemade pizza....so......he played Mario Kart with my teen dd instead. They had a blast! I am 49yo.

 

He also plays a lot of games with my 24yo ds. It's been a great bonding thing for them. Dh likes the Pure racing games best on XBox, I believe. Also, they both are really into radio controlled airplanes and helicopters so they often go outside and play this as well.

 

But he isn't addicted. He's a busy guy, works hard and enjoys his down-time. We enjoy playing video games with each other and with our dc, but we also do many other things as well. I don't see his liking to play video games as a problem in our home or in our marriage. It's just something he has always enjoyed doing for as long as we've had a computer (what, almost 20 years or more). We've been married just over 26 years now.

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Yes, my dh plays video games. He does more in a week than most men do in a month. He works long hours, is a scoutmaster, is remodeling our kitchen, works in the yard, teaches the kids all the handy things he does, just taught himself how to cook his favorite Thai and Indian dishes, and romanced me happily back into our marriage. He plays games with our kids sometimes or on his own just to decompress.

 

How do you know your husband does more in a week than most men do in a month? I'm sincerely curious, because these kinds of comparisons strike me as so random. If, for example, I knew your husband solely as a passing acquaintance, I likely wouldn't know about all his activities (in addition to his income-earning job). Likewise, I would assume you aren't aware of what most men are doing "behind the scenes". Or maybe you were speaking figuratively and I'm reading too much into your comment. I could definitely be guilty of that.:D

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Yeah, it might have been an exageration. My dh works 60+ hours a week and even travels weekly. When he's home he is Mr. Dad or Mr. Fix-it. He not only teaches his own kids but many scouts and takes them hiking and camping, while other dads (some homeschooling ones) run off for hunting or softball games, etc. I know there are many guys like him, but I think they are the exception and not the rule - my own opinion of course. Anyway, my point was that I don't begrudge him his computer/video game time. He is entitled to something of his own, some down time, even if it seems wasteful to some.

Edited by True Blue
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that my question somehow implied that men who play video games are lazy or need to justify how they spend their time. That was definitely not my intention.

 

I do think most men I know spend A LOT of time working at work and then working in their yards and then playing sports with or without their kids and otherwise participating in family life. I can't imagine how your husband is doing that much more than most men I know since they all seem fully occupied, if not with paid work alone then with work and a mix of hobbies and family life and church and ministry. What is it your think the rest of our husbands do with their time?

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Dh is 31 and he spends an hour or 2, and often times more, on...something. We have a computer, a laptop, an XBOX 360, a Wii, a PS3, and 2 PSP's. :D

 

My kids play probably... 6-8 hours/week, and often times spend their evenings watching DH and I play.

 

We just beat several new co-op games together, and it was so much fun cuddling up on the couch and killing zombies and stuff. :)

 

Yes it's strange to some, but it's great fun for us and our family.

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that my question somehow implied that men who play video games are lazy or need to justify how they spend their time. That was definitely not my intention.

 

I do think most men I know spend A LOT of time working at work and then working in their yards and then playing sports with or without their kids and otherwise participating in family life. I can't imagine how your husband is doing that much more than most men I know since they all seem fully occupied, if not with paid work alone then with work and a mix of hobbies and family life and church and ministry. What is it your think the rest of our husbands do with their time?

 

No, I didn't get that from your post. I felt a little judgement from other posts.

 

Do you think I am saying no husbands here do a lot? No, I am not. I think my dh goes beyond what I see dads in my area do and the dads in our families. Sorry for the cliche.

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As opposed to...? Just curious. I'm rather surprised at some of the responses that seem to imply that there is something wrong with adults who like to play video games. What should we be doing with our free time?

 

 

 

 

I'm sorry, Beth. I should have been more clear. I do fail to see what keeps a person interested in video game, but I am also quite sure there are many folks who fail to see why I am interested in those things that keep me company in my spare time.

Food Network? Check.

Sunset Magazine? Check

Reading in the evening? Check

Homeschool message boards. Check. ;)

 

Yep. I lead a pretty boring life.

I was just trying to say that we're not much of a video game family (though my boys do play a bit on weekends) so I don't 'get it'.

I was not trying to disparage those who do.

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My dh works 80+ hours a week and even travels weekly. When he's home he is Mr. Dad or Mr. Fix-it. He not only teaches his own kids but many scouts and takes them hiking and camping, while other dads (some homeschooling ones) run off for hunting or softball games, etc. I know there are many guys like him, but I think they are the exception and not the rule - my own opinion of course.

 

Imo, men who work way beyond a 40-hour work week and then go the extra mile as far as coaching a child's sport, heading up a youth group, taking care of the hosue/yard (actually an outlet for a lot of guys) are fairly typical. There's this caricature floating about of couch potato men watching sports and downing beers all weekend, and that's just not reality, in my experience. My own husband puts in crazy hours of course (I say "of course" because that's not too unusual for a farmer), but I can't say it's excessive compared to a lot of guys who have white collar jobs, business travel, etc. A lot of these men are really stretching to cover all the bases, kwim?

 

Anyway, my point was that I don't begrudge him his computer/video game time. He is entitled to something of his own, some down time, even if it seems wasteful to some.

 

Yeah, I understand your point. It's good that you're both comfortable in that respect.:)

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I do fail to see what keeps a person interested in video game, but I am also quite sure there are many folks who fail to see why I am interested in those things that keep me company in my spare time.

 

Yup, I'd much rather be shoveling horse cr*p into a wheel barrow then playing video games...but that's just me!

 

I hate video games as a form of entertainment for myself. My kids have tried to get me to play and after 2 minutes it's, "Can we play Catch Phrase?" DH is the same - no interest other then occational with the kids.

 

As I metioned on the other thread, he does play Webkinz on the computer with DD8. I failed to tell everyone that sometimes I find him playing this when SHE is not home! :lol::lol: I say, "What are you DOING???" His response, "I'm winning her some more money so she can buy her pony a new _______. She'll be so excited!" Awwww, what a sweetie! No, my DH is much too busy, honestly, to play video games. Work, farm, kids and me take ALL his time. That's just the truth.

 

ps. I dont' think there is ANYTHING wrong with playig video games as a form of entertainment or hobby, no matter what your age.

Edited by katemary63
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As opposed to...? Just curious.

 

We can all look at one another's activities and pass judgment based on what we deem more or less worthy, but I know that isn't what Dana intended when she posted, nor what Crissy intended by her response.

 

What should we be doing with our free time?

 

What should we be doing with our free time? That's a very good question, and of course there's no right or wrong answer. I am one who looks forward to giving more to others when I have more free time. Helping those less fortunate is of great importance to me. At this point, I am relatively homebound. That's okay! This is a season. But when I do have more time on my hands, I don't want to spend that time solely on self-involved activities.

 

Gardening? -- yuck! I fail to see why playing in the dirt is considered to be an okay grownup hobby.

 

I know you dislike outdoor activities. Because of that, it's understandable that you don't have a desire to garden. Nothing wrong with that.:) Please understand, though, that if you want others to respect how you spend your time, you must extend the same courtesy to them. Your comment here in particular irritates me because many people on this board keep gardens as a means of growing food. Referring to their efforts as "playing in the dirt" conveys not only a lack of respect, but a lack of awareness. Growing food is no more a "hobby" than is grocery shopping.

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Dh is 43 and plays video games several times a week on his PS3.Sometimes with a younger friend, sometimes by himself after the children have gone to bed.He plays the game until he has finished it or is tired of it and then moves on to the next one. Unlike the girls who will just spend hours running Niko from "San Andreas" around the city and changing his clothes. Sometimes dh will play the Wii with the children or we all play it together. I will play a few games on the Wii but I won't play the PS3. I just don't like having to do something over and over until you get the move just right. Dh's friend, who is in his late 20's, lives and breaths video games to the point where even dh gets frustrated with him sometimes. Although you didn't ask, I 'll add that my oldest dd prefers games on the computer to video games but she does play video games maybe 4 times a week.My youngest hasn't had a good day (in her mind) unless she has played both video games and on the computer.

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I don't even know any adults in my "real" life that do play. DH is 46 and I am 37.

 

And my "wii" story:

 

My two older children were out walking our dog. A little boy down the street came out of his house yelling to my ds, "Joseph! We got a Wii! We got a Wii!"

 

My poor ds came home and said, "Why the heck was Will yelling at us that he had to go to the bathroom? That was weird."

 

At which time, I had to explain to him what a Wii was. He gets it now that we are the weird ones. :001_huh::lol:

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My two older children were out walking our dog. A little boy down the street came out of his house yelling to my ds, "Joseph! We got a Wii! We got a Wii!"

 

My poor ds came home and said, "Why the heck was Will yelling at us that he had to go to the bathroom? That was weird."

 

 

smiley-laughing024.gif

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My two older children were out walking our dog. A little boy down the street came out of his house yelling to my ds, "Joseph! We got a Wii! We got a Wii!"

 

My poor ds came home and said, "Why the heck was Will yelling at us that he had to go to the bathroom? That was weird."

 

 

 

That is hilarious!

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Yes. It's (part of) his job. He's (whispering) 32. :) We were in college almost ten years after you.

 

That said, dh doesn't play all the time. He spends more time (by far) making games than playing them, and probably an equal (or greater) amount of time writing about games as making them. (I, apparently, spend my time using parentheses...)

 

Most of the men I know in their 30s play games at least *occasionally*, even if that just means Wii Bowling with their kids from time to time. I don't typically play video games, but I do play puzzle games (Tetris genre) while I'm working... Perhaps it's the equivalent of doodling in the margins while working? And sometimes I'll even play a game like Animal Crossing on the DS (lots of fun!) or DDR (Dance Dance Revolution). So even though I wouldn't ever consider myself a "gamer", they're certainly a part of my life, even if I only play rarely.

 

I'll watch dh play sometimes too. Some games can lend themselves to that, and others are just plain annoying. ;) If he's researching a game and playing one of those ultra violent games like you mentioned in the previous thread, I usually stay out of the room (or sit in there and read a book or do work on the computer, if it isn't too loud and obnoxious). He doesn't play those games for "fun" much.

 

I didn't respond in the previous thread. Basically, it sounds like you have a good relationship with your son. I think, on the one hand, he's an adult and it's *not* the same as having a 17yo who lives in your home full time. It doesn't sound like he's unhealthfully obsessed with video games, and he's respectful of playing those games outside the presence of his little brothers. On the other hand, I don't think you'd be out of line to tell him how uncomfortable those games make you feel and why. Not in a "laying down the law" sort of way (as you would be justified in doing with a teen, I think), but in a calmer, matter-of-fact way. Don't lay on the guilt, just let him know that you're uncomfortable with the idea and why.

 

I really don't think that moderate play of violent video games (in which I have *zero* personal interest) is more damaging to healthy, grounded adults than most other forms of entertainment. Sure, if it were my own son (someday -- he is small now and his "violent" video games consist pretty much entirely of occasionally watching Lego constructions get blasted into their component parts), I'd rather he was playing Guitar Hero and Wii Sports... Sigh. So I do understand what you're saying. But I also think your son is not unusual or headed towards ultimate perdition because of a young adult phase of playing such games.

 

Also, many of the men in their 30s that I know now, who once played games like that in their free time and who still play games as (more mature) adults, no longer gravitate to games like that as much. They would still play, if invited to do so with a friend, but it's not what they seek out as much. Obviously there's great variation in individuals, but from my own inexpert observations, it does appear that as they mature and have families of their own, they're less likely to play those games than games that require more strategy and less blood...

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