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Are flowers the only appropriate thing to send for a death?


Bess
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Either that or a donation to a worthy cause in the name of the person who passed. For instance several times we have purchased Gideon Bibles in memory of a person that passed. Some places (like the Gideons) have Memorial cards that you then send to the family. If the person had a "pet cause" or favorite organization, this is a nice gesture. HTH

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I think that some religions prefer plants to cut flowers too but that is a niggling thought in the back of my head and I don't know where it came from......

 

If its local, how about a call to a take out on a night that you know they are home and haven't cooked anything yet?

 

It really is the thought that counts.

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If you look at the death notice in the paper it might tell you what the person's wishes were. It might say "In lieu of flowers, _______ has requested ..."

 

We just returned from Florida. We stayed at Give Kids the World Village. This trip was through Make A Wish. Give Kids the World accepts donations in the name of loved ones. You pay X amount and they will send a card to the family of the deceased. They will not list the amount of the donation on the card. There are many worthy causes. I will definitely send a donation to Give Kids the World if a family asks for no flowers. It is a wonderful organization.

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When someone dies all the neighbors and nearby relatives bring food. Usually people who have just lost a close relative don't feel like eating, much less cooking. Also, there are often relatives coming from out of town and it's nice to have something good to feed them so that you can relax at home with them rather than having to go to a restaurant.

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a paid-up house cleaning from a local cleaning service is a great gift. At the time of a death, families are exhausted and overwhelmed AND expecting lots of company....not a great combination. Look in your Yellow Pages and talk to the local maid/cleaning service. I know that our local service will take your credit card number, send a certificate, and then wait to charge your card until the recipient calls to set up a time for the cleaning.

 

SWB

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When our daughter died, my brother and his wife purchased Gideon Bibles in her name (they do this every year on her birthday, as well). We also had several people donate to our church in her memory (dh is a pastor), and a few people donated to the March of Dimes (she had a birth defect). Another friend sent a huge deli tray of luncheon meats/sandwich 'fixings', which really came in handy when all the relatives descended.

 

Personally, I preferred potted plants over cut flowers (my logic would probably not matter with most deaths, but I am throwing it out there, anyway). When the flowers died and had to be thrown away, I (in the midst of my not-logical grief) got pretty upset -- of course I couldn't keep a baby alive -- I couldn't even keep flowers alive! In comparison, I still have one potted plant that is still alive, and it has become very special to me because it is a (very small) tangible link to her.

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