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Are you addicted to "busy-ness"?


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I ask because I think *I* am! For the past several years, I have been SO VERY BUSY. I remember feeling that there just weren't enough hours in the day. I would get up early and hit the ground running -- working on schoolwork, chauffeuring the kids to and from their activities, doing the laundry, cooking the meals and cleaning the kitchen, doing a bit of housework here and there whenever I could manage to squeeze in the time to do it -- and falling into bed past midnight, exhausted, only to get up the next morning and start all over again. I remember longing for an hour or two of peace and quiet, but rarely getting it.

 

And you know what? Now that ER's away at college and I'm homeschooling only one, our schedule is drastically lighter than it was, I actually have times when I can relax, yet I find myself longing for those busy days! I get really, really restless. I find myself pacing, looking for something to *do*. I feel almost guilty for sitting down to read a magazine, and I can hardly watch a tv program without thinking that I should have my hands busy doing some mending, or working on next week's lesson plans, etc. What is up with that?!?!?

Edited by ereks mom
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In fact today I was thinking to myself that I've hardly accomplished anything. I'm a bit under the weather BUT I've baked three loaves of bread, prepared supper, did some stuff with my kids this morning, have taken care of three dogs and their needs and am on my way to work for the afternoon (oh yeah and talked with my bf on the phone for 30 minutes and did some reading). And yet I feel like I haven't really done enough today.

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I went through a drastic phase of this type thing a few years ago when I closed my studio. For months afterward, I'd be unable to relax. I'd actually flinch and panic that I wasn't doing something that needed doing. My motor had been running on high for so long, that I could not relax.

 

It took almost a year of de-toxing for me to feel less stressed. I still like being productive, but I now understand that I must have time to relax and chill. My health and outlook is better now. These days I don't just run from one task to the next. I'm much more deliberate in my decisions and choices.

 

I need a state of 'being' for me to be creative, happy, and healthy.

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I think having children go off to college changes the entire dynamic of not only your home-schooling, but your entire life.

 

When my oldest (ds) went off to college, I still had two younger dds left at home to school, and while we missed him......I was busy, busy, busy: school lesson, music lessons, ballet lessons, performances, (a lot of these lessons I had to drive over an hour each way and it made for long, long days).....add in laundry, cooking and house-cleaning.....and there just wasn't enough hours in the day.

 

This year, however, my middle child (dd) went off to college. Now.....quite suddenly.....I have one adult child in his own house working a career in a town 65 miles from me ; one adult child in college over 10 hours from me.......and my last baby at home is an involved in the community, independent learner that only needs me to schedule her lessons, check them at the end of the week and to drive her here and there (but never more than 10 min. at a time)

 

So, yeah, I feel lost and lazy. There just isn't enough to do and things that used to take me forever to do are now done in minutes......and then that long day stretching on.......

 

I feel for ya, friend! Commiserating with you over here in "nearing the end of homeschooling" land.

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I think having children go off to college changes the entire dynamic of not only your home-schooling, but your entire life.

 

When my oldest (ds) went off to college, I still had two younger dds left at home to school, and while we missed him......I was busy, busy, busy: school lesson, music lessons, ballet lessons, performances, (a lot of these lessons I had to drive over an hour each way and it made for long, long days).....add in laundry, cooking and house-cleaning.....and there just wasn't enough hours in the day.

 

This year, however, my middle child (dd) went off to college. Now.....quite suddenly.....I have one adult child in his own house working a career in a town 65 miles from me ; one adult child in college over 10 hours from me.......and my last baby at home is an involved in the community, independent learner that only needs me to schedule her lessons, check them at the end of the week and to drive her here and there (but never more than 10 min. at a time)

 

So, yeah, I feel lost and lazy. There just isn't enough to do and things that used to take me forever to do are now done in minutes......and then that long day stretching on.......

 

I feel for ya, friend! Commiserating with you over here in "nearing the end of homeschooling" land.

 

Lost and lazy. That describes it pretty well. I tend to be a Type-A personality, and I love it when I can look back at the end of the day and feel that I've really accomplished a lot. I love that tired-but-satisfied feeling you get when you've worked hard mentally, physically, or both, and now you can sit down and relax. It seems pointless to relax when it doesn't really feel like I've *done* anything, KWIM?

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I still like being productive, but I now understand that I must have time to relax and chill. My health and outlook is better now. These days I don't just run from one task to the next. I'm much more deliberate in my decisions and choices.

 

I need a state of 'being' for me to be creative, happy, and healthy.

 

I am working on getting to that point, but it is really taking some doing!

 

Like you, I need to feel that I'm accomplishing something worthwhile.

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I'm not a type-A but I seem to be a person who enjoys feeling productive. I really hate games and crafts unless I can be making something or learning something useful.

 

Somewhere along the way I discovered hand sewing. Crochet or knitting would do the same thing nicely. I have done some elaborate embroidered pillows, tried my hand at cross-stitch, and keep a mending basket that gets emptied regularly.

 

I feel able to sit down and rest and get my breath and energy back when I have some hand work to do while I'm resting.

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No, I'm not addicted to 'busy-ness'. We do fall into traps where we sometimes enter 'busy-ness', but once I realize it, I make adjustments to move us out of that state asap. I'm not sure how you can keep it up. I have friends (& a few relatives) who are always so busy & I look on in wonder & amazement as to 1) how they can continue like that for an extended time and 2) why they aren't nuts from the schedules they keep. (No offense intended, btw; I just can't figure it out! LOL.)

 

I like (and need) time to just 'be'. I also like ensuring that my kids have time to 'be'. For me, just 'being' (and not 'doing') is critical -- along the lines of sleep & food.

 

Though we do plenty (imo), I feel like we are often in the slow lane of life (compared to many around us), and I like it that way.

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