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"Friggin'"=Bad Word to my friend. What are yours?


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What "bad words" do you allow your children to say? I won't ask which you ban, because there will already be enough asterisks in this thread!

 

We allow fart, friggin', dumb, idiot (but you can't name call), darn it, butt, and poop. Some people consider all of them as bad as the f-bomb.

 

My sister in law will not allow the word, "Hate" in her house.

 

Different words push different folks' buttons. Just wondering where you all draw the line.

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We pretty much use the same words. I remember getting in trouble for saying fart as a child. :glare: We are somewhat liberal when it comes to words, but try to give ourselves and ds better choices.

 

I don't like the word "Hate" more for the mindset it creates than thinking it's a bad word. We correct each other for using it. "Can't" falls into the same category.

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What "bad words" do you allow your children to say? I won't ask which you ban, because there will already be enough asterisks in this thread!

 

We allow fart, friggin', dumb, idiot (but you can't name call), darn it, butt, and poop. Some people consider all of them as bad as the f-bomb.

 

My sister in law will not allow the word, "Hate" in her house.

 

Different words push different folks' buttons. Just wondering where you all draw the line.

 

The only one from your list that I wouldn't allow is "friggin'". It is too close to the Other Word for me. I also do not allow any expressions that use God or God's name because I feel they are disrespectful.

 

My kids have been known to slip a D*mn or an A** with little more than a reminder as a consequence (they hear them from me occasionally...) I don't bat an eye to stupid, hate, or most potty words unless they are used to insult people. Kindness and respect are far more important than vocabulary.

 

I also think that by reacting strongly to offensive words, we give them more power than they deserve and can actually add to their appeal.

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We don't allow the ones you mentioned other than butt and poop. They use those when they are referring to their butt or they have to poop:lol:, they don't call each other that or use it in a negitive way. My huband and I don't talk like that and so it's not so much that they are not allowed, it's just not what they hear.

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We pretty much use the same words. I remember getting in trouble for saying fart as a child. :glare: We are somewhat liberal when it comes to words, but try to give ourselves and ds better choices.

 

I don't like the word "Hate" more for the mindset it creates than thinking it's a bad word. We correct each other for using it. "Can't" falls into the same category.

 

A few years ago I watched a fellow mom insist her preschool-age boy go into the sanctuary during a noise VBS music presentation. The boy told his mother "I hate the music!" She jumped all over his vocabulary, and completely missed the fact that the poor child probably found the music and the noise to be overwhelming. :001_rolleyes:

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We don't do cuss words, cursing, or substitutions. *I* have said "crud" a few times (even on the board) but that is as bad as it gets and I'm not proud of it. I usually wish I had done better!

 

There is also no name calling or derogatory remarks (stupid, idiot, butthead, whatever).

 

We DO say poop such as "shovel dog poop" though on the extra chore chart, it's "dog mess."

 

We don't say f@rt (even typing it makes my head spin).

 

We only say hell when it's relevant to a Bible discussion.

 

Funny story about not allowing the word hate: DS was VERY mad at me in the library. He was about 4 years old. He growled, "I DESPISE YOU." I didn't know whether to fall out laughing or what. Others thought he was quite precocious <sigh>. I gave the same explanation I would have for hate though (we save that for things/issues that deal with satan). He's not used it since.

 

That is also the only time I've had to correct my children regarding language. However, THEY have asked MANY children to curb their language when with them. I also have gotten onto my friend's 6yo for saying d@rn it, cr@p, and such in my home.

 

GENERALLY, my kids are even more conservative than I am.

 

PRETTY much, we try not to say things that would offend ANYONE else, even the very conservative.

Edited by 2J5M9K
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I don't allow most of the ones you mentioned in your first post - I can't say dumb or idiot has ever come up, I think we have used them in conversation but I wouldn't let my kids call each other names with them. We allow the kids to say poop in the context of "I have to...." LOL but in general potty talk is not allowed. We don't allow the kids to say butt, we have always taught them to say "bum".

 

I've found I have to be super strict in terms of vocabulary because with 4 little boys it all feeds on itself pretty quickly - nothing is funny just one time, it's funny 500 times. They will get out of control with the potty talk and inappropriate pretty quickly...so yeah, we keep a really tight reign on language.

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Hmm... This hasn't really ever come up. I think the only one that we allow that many don't is "Shut up." But it's not something we say often.

 

My boys tend to make up their own hurtful names. Ds 13 and 8 can make the 5 yo ds cry by calling him a "Pesterbug."

 

When ds5 was 3 he would jest yell "Meaner!" when he was angry at someone. :)

 

We kind of just discourage those kids of words and redirect, so they haven't really been an issue..... yet. I'm sure the day is coming when one of them will want to try something out. :)

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Name calling isn't allowed in our house, whether they're "four letter" names or tamer ones.

 

My ds would never utter a near-curse word, let alone an actual curse word. My dds, otoh, have to be reminded to watch themselves. In the past week, they've told me they were not only freezing their "arses" off, but also sweating their "arses" off. At different times, of course.

 

Quite frankly, it doesn't bug me, but we absolutely don't allow that in public, which is why we give reminders, but not punishments. Even for "frickin'", which is a staple in our house. :001_unsure:

 

I just see it as similar to using changing rooms in public, while they strip down and suit up in the middle fo the living room at home. (And that took some reminders when they were younger, too.)

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The only thing I can think of is "Uugh". My kids say that because I say it.

 

They aren't exposed to much slang (no tv) so we've not had to ban it.

 

We don't say any of the words previously mentioned, except poo & fart when referring to those "things".

 

So you might hear my husband say, "Okay, fess up. Who farted, cause it smells like stinky cheese in here!"

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This reminds me of a story that a youth pastor friend told us. He was on a missions trip to Poland with his group from Cali and another youth group from Georgia. One of the first nights, Georgia's pastor pulls our friend aside to talk over a problem. One of the students is using bad language. Student said the S word. This being really out of character for that kid, our friend says, "he said sh*t?!" No code word. Georgia youth pastor sputters, "No! He said sucks!" Sucks was "the S word" for that group. Our friend let Georgia pastor know that Cali group would do their best to respect them, but sucks isn't considered a curse word in California and the students may slip up. Our friends said that the culture difference between the Georgia and Cali group was way more severe than the difference between Cali and Poland kids.

 

I say friggin all the time. And the S-word, too.

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I hate "sucks" and "crap". Of course, "friggin" is banned in our house. I tell ds to come with other adjectives to address what he's feeling besides near curse words. He's only cursed in front of dh and me once, it was the "f" word and dh pulled the car over, pulled out 10 yo ds and gave him a spanking on the side of the road. We've never had that problem since. I've tried to get through to ds that using a near curse word is still a curse; he's just changing the words. Basically, I'm trying to implement that there are better ways to deal with frustration and anger than cursing. Of course, this is a struggle for me also!

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My mil is a proud adherent of the club which bans any so-called derivative of "****" (ie dang, darn, etc.). But she freely uses the term "crap" which is really a vulgar word in my opinion. So...the other day the boys got the board game, Fact or Crap. Well, knowing their mom's aversion to the word "crap", my son decided that the acronym ADOM would suit the game - Already Digested Organic Matter. I'm fine with it :lol:

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We're actually super-strict about this. We don't allow any euphemisms for taking God's name in vain...period. We don't allow any fake substitutions for swear words (or the real thing ;) ). Like the OP's SIL, we do not allow the word "hate" to be used unless we are reading the Bible. Poop is allowed when referring to the real thing, but no other "potty humor" is allowed. This may be easier with daughters than sons, so I hear ;)

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I don't allow most of the ones on your list. We use poo but only if we're talking about the poo in our lives for some reason. Poo is not the punch-line of a joke (though we have been known to scold each other while giggling on a very odd occasion).

 

I will tell you, even though you asked me not to :blush5:, one word I just can't stand that doesn't seem to make *anyone else's* list. Ugh, I don't even know if I can type it. Ich . . . it's . . . ewww one of the coaches kept using it at HapKiDo last night. It's . . . s.q.u.a.t. AAAAAaaaaaagggggghhhhhhh! I cannot believe I just typed that word!!! We crouch. We stoop. We bend. For crying out lout we can get a really, really, low horse stance w/o using that a.w.f.u.l! word. Every time I glance up and see that word my teeth get fuzzy and my hair stands on end.

 

The H-word is hate and the S-word is stupid. Sucks has never come up and it better not. I'd definately call friggin/freakin' the F-word and no, we don't use it or expect to hear it from my daughter.

 

And, while we never ever find body/bathroom humor fit fare for our intelligence we have found that with just a little practice we can snigger at an occasional slip and scowl with indignation at everyone else who laughs all at the same time. tricky. I just know I need to point out that that's a joke.

 

Oh, no way for allowing Our Lord's name in vain. That includes thinly veiled allusions. However, our list of "thinly veiled allusions" has recently grown. I never thought of some words as . . . what they are. I'm revisiting that.

Edited by MomOfOneFunOne
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No "bad words" here, only bad grammar. :D

 

Really, I take no exception to any given word - people seem quite skilled at denigrating others without using "bad" words. My kids just aren't allowed to use words to hurt other people's feelings.

 

Oh, and saying the same thing over and over and over and over, like a tic is out because it annoys me.

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I tolerate a moderate amount of potty talk but not name calling. Lately their favorite go to is "You sucker!" when one of them has wronged the other. Uh...no! It sounds way too much like, well, you know. My ds10 recently commented that so and so was acting like an idiot. I insisted that if he must describe somebody in such a manner that he use more imaginative language. He furrowed his brow for a moment before replying, "Okay, he was acting like a sack of swine!" LOLOLOL We watched a YouTube video of some guy talking about real trash-talk and how modern insults are so weak. I think he said that Shakespeare really knew how to insult somebody! Then he listed off all of these descriptive insults, it was fabulous.

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This reminds me of a story that a youth pastor friend told us. He was on a missions trip to Poland with his group from Cali and another youth group from Georgia. One of the first nights, Georgia's pastor pulls our friend aside to talk over a problem. One of the students is using bad language. Student said the S word. This being really out of character for that kid, our friend says, "he said sh*t?!" No code word. Georgia youth pastor sputters, "No! He said sucks!" Sucks was "the S word" for that group. Our friend let Georgia pastor know that Cali group would do their best to respect them, but sucks isn't considered a curse word in California and the students may slip up. Our friends said that the culture difference between the Georgia and Cali group was way more severe than the difference between Cali and Poland kids.

 

I say friggin all the time. And the S-word, too.

 

I have issues with the word "sucks". As a child living with my father I got into the habit of using it. Then I went to visit my Mom, who hated the word. She would slap me across the face for saying it, which seemed to happen out of the blue for me because the word had just become a part of my vocabulary. It still makes me angry when I think about it. We would be having a perfectly wonderful time together, then Whammo! She would hit me. :blink:

 

I think my relaxed attitude over vocabulary is probably rebellion of sorts to the way I was treated. Ultimately, no matter how ugly they are, they are still only WORDS. I can't see myself ever treating my child that way over a word.

 

So here you go, Mom:

 

sucks, sucks, sucks, sucks, SUCKS!!!

 

Man, I need help... :lol:

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At home with just immediate family, we allow the typical curse words except the F-bomb from 15 year old ds. He understands that they are just words, but that they make a person appear too uneducated to find better words, or better ways to express anger. In public, he uses darn, crap, sucks, and friggin. On the other hand, we don't use hate or shut-up at all nor is he allowed to refer to someone as dumb, stupid, idiot, etc.

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our house rule is you may not call a person by any name his/her mother doesn't call him/her. Other than that, I'm pretty much okay with words.

My kids have "tried on" various swear words. No reaction from me so not so fun to say them. I do explain what the word means if I hear it and offer up an alternative. I also point out places where these words would be less acceptable. Make that unacceptable.

the one word we use a lot is crap. My grandmother (who is a *saint* btw) said this word, so I never even knew it was considered a swear by some.

The other rule we have is that all body parts are called by their correct names and silly words are not used for bodily functions. Our bodies are not gross, they are wonderful; correct anatomical names are not shameful, they are simply descriptive.

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This thread makes me laugh. As a child, I was not allowed to say...crap, pee, poop,(had to use the real names...embarrassed me!) no cursing at all....I could say dang or darn as a teen. Of course, I always thought/think it's funny that my mom doesn't think twice about saying that someone screwed her over. "It's not a bad word! "

I went through cursing as a young adult...and resort to it occasionally as an adult....BUT, not often, and I try not to.. (My favorite thing to say is "I don't give a flying fig..." Is that bad? :-)

Carrie:-)

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It depends on the DC's ages as to what is acceptable. "Dang" and "darnit" sound heinous from a 2y/o, but ten years later don't find it offensive. Kids say friggin' and the fart/butt stuff. It annoys me immensely, but DH allows it. argh

Wish they wouldn't say shut up, but allowed it when they were little and think it's too late to reverse the rule.

My favorite swear phrase is "fiddle sticks", thank you Scarlett O'Hara! :)

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"Crap" has always been used in to replace the word "stuff" in my family. I really don't know why... but that is one that we have always found acceptable and some others don't. DH and our nephews say "sucks" quite a bit, but we get on to DD for saying it.

 

We don't do cuss words, cursing, or substitutions. *I* have said "crud" a few times (even on the board) but that is as bad as it gets and I'm not proud of it. I usually wish I had done better!

 

There is also no name calling or derogatory remarks (stupid, idiot, butthead, whatever).

 

We DO say poop such as "shovel dog poop" though on the extra chore chart, it's "dog mess."

 

We don't say f@rt (even typing it makes my head spin).

 

We only say hell when it's relevant to a Bible discussion.

 

Funny story about not allowing the word hate: DS was VERY mad at me in the library. He was about 4 years old. He growled, "I DESPISE YOU." I didn't know whether to fall out laughing or what. Others thought he was quite precocious <sigh>. I gave the same explanation I would have for hate though (we save that for things/issues that deal with satan). He's not used it since.

 

That is also the only time I've had to correct my children regarding language. However, THEY have asked MANY children to curb their language when with them. I also have gotten onto my friend's 6yo for saying d@rn it, cr@p, and such in my home.

 

GENERALLY, my kids are even more conservative than I am.

 

PRETTY much, we try not to say things that would offend ANYONE else, even the very conservative.

This is what I agree with, (truly) but I don't practice it. :glare: Ever since I had PPD and many difficulties (a disablingly bad back and muscle problems my whole life, bedrest while pregnant, a colicky baby weighed 19 lbs at less than three months and 25 at 5 months.... need I say more?) I have had VERY bad language. VERY bad, though mostly euphanisms, not the real thing. And DD copies me. I cannot punish her for doing something that I model to her all the time. :( It does improve if I focus on it, but I also find it hard to accomplish much of anything and I am gaining weight. There are so many issues to work on, and it seems that I can't focus on them all. One at a time improves for a while. :( A lot of times I will say SSSSHHHHH, or FFFFFFFF... just the beginning sound but not the word.

 

So there you have it. I am incredibly imperfect. One of my faults is a crushingly low self-esteem to the point that I sometimes avoid praying. This only makes that problem worse. Of course I feel guilty.

Edited by Lovedtodeath
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We really don't say anything, I say Holy Smoly, and crud, sometimes. Everyone except me says "fart" when some one passes gas. But when they do I correct them and say "pass gas.:D My ds(7) got mad one day and said, "That is just a bunch of...and he spelled D-U-K-E ! (for "dookie"). Now it is a family joke!! We all go around saying "that's a bunch of DUKE. Which suits us NC State fans, as you can tell we don't like Duke, or is it dookie!!:lol::lol:

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http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=frigging

 

Definition #1 is why I never allow that word in my house. Period.

 

I agree with your friend.

 

Heehee. I like #3, though.

 

Here's a "bad word" scandal that I just discovered while reading my grandmother's memory book: It appears that she made a career of defacing (by Sharpie) library books! She would check books out and then black out the bad words! For DECADES! (I have no idea if anyone at the library caught on to her.)

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Well, I'm pretty liberal here. Words are just words to us. It's the intent behind them that concerns me. I don't have a problem with my kids using any of the words listed. We don't use words to hurt others. But crap, da*n, etc aren't biggies. We typically use lots of British slang which will probably bite is in the arse if we ever travel there. Bugger, bloody hell, bullocks- all fine here.

When I was younger my parents were really good friends with another couple who were very strict about language. Their push button phrases were pissed off and sucked, as in "That sucked!"

We just tell our kids that if someone asks them not to use a certain word in his/her presense to have consideration.

The one word that is really frowned upon in my house is the word starving. My dad was very hungry often as a child and we want our kids to understand that just because they are hungry that doesn't even come close to starving. When their belllies have been empty for a week, then they can use that word otherwise, stick to super hungry!

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You can call a thing or idea stupid, but not a person. Shut up has never been a problem, but I think that's because he's an only and it's probably more of a sibling thing than a friend over to play thing. A lot of the orginal words mentioned have just never come up (outside of an actual bathroom situation). The occasional **** comes out, but that's becasue we'll say it as well.

 

The only words that have ever come up that have had to be banned are ain't and ya'll.

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We have cracked down on the name-calling sort, and "shut up" gets under my skin, so those are the big ones here. After watching one of the Charlie Brown holiday specials, the kids started using "blockhead," and my 5 year old pointed out that I had never told them not to say that one before..... They really know how to push boundaries. But I don't really have limits on body parts or bodily functions, at least not yet.

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Well, we're pretty conservative when it comes to swear words. None on your list are allowed. Probably the biggest offender is me :blushing:, and then I have to apologize to the family. We do believe words are important and have power - the power to form morals and character. I know many will disagree, but those are our house rules.

 

Janet

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What "bad words" do you allow your children to say? I won't ask which you ban, because there will already be enough asterisks in this thread!

 

We allow fart, friggin', dumb, idiot (but you can't name call), darn it, butt, and poop. Some people consider all of them as bad as the f-bomb.

 

My sister in law will not allow the word, "Hate" in her house.

 

Different words push different folks' buttons. Just wondering where you all draw the line.

 

I don't think you really want to know, specifically. I don't disallow any words in our family - everyone has the right to use whatever word they need or want to use.

 

They will self-censor racial epithets (we were recently studying Niger and it was driving my 12yo insane :)) but I have no problem with them "cursing". We don't have "bad words" in our family.

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What "bad words" do you allow your children to say? I won't ask which you ban, because there will already be enough asterisks in this thread!

 

We allow fart, friggin', dumb, idiot (but you can't name call), darn it, butt, and poop. Some people consider all of them as bad as the f-bomb.

 

My sister in law will not allow the word, "Hate" in her house.

 

Different words push different folks' buttons. Just wondering where you all draw the line.

 

We don't allow friggin' because I feel it's just a substitute for the f-bomb. Eventually, it just turns into the f-bomb. We also don't use idiot or stupid..it's too easy to misuse them. We do use stinkin' or goofy. I know, it seems a little silly,but it just is really important to me that my dc speak like intelligent young men and women one day, and not allow their mouths to mess up their witness. That's just how we do it here!

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They will self-censor racial epithets (we were recently studying Niger and it was driving my 12yo insane :)) but I have no problem with them "cursing". We don't have "bad words" in our family.

 

I was pretty sure that Niger is pronounced with a long "i" but I wasn't sure, so I looked it up. This should comfort your 12yo:

 

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/Niger

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I was pretty sure that Niger is pronounced with a long "i" but I wasn't sure, so I looked it up. This should comfort your 12yo:

 

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/Niger

 

And a soft g, not a hard g.

 

My 10 year old hates discussing his anus. I mean, Uranus. He insists upon the "new" pronunciation, and it drives me frickin' batty! Pardon my French. ;)

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Well, sadly, I say cr@p a lot. And, although it has not been the norm, I have been telling the girls to shut up a lot, too. It bothers me and is a big clue as to the level of stress I've been feeling with them lately.

 

I don't generally say fart because we weren't allowed to as kids. I do say friggin' but after reading that definition it will be axed from my vocabulary.

 

I tend to have a hard time refraining from using curse words. It's a terrible habit and I've worked really hard to stop since having kids. I'm not perfect at not cursing, however. Apparently I did it a lot more when I was pregnant because I would hear the girls say something like "Just TAKE the d*mn thing!" when we were out somewhere. :blushing: So now we're all working on speaking more kindly to one another.

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Well, sadly, I say cr@p a lot. And, although it has not been the norm, I have been telling the girls to shut up a lot, too. It bothers me and is a big clue as to the level of stress I've been feeling with them lately.

 

I don't generally say fart because we weren't allowed to as kids. I do say friggin' but after reading that definition it will be axed from my vocabulary.

 

I tend to have a hard time refraining from using curse words. It's a terrible habit and I've worked really hard to stop since having kids. I'm not perfect at not cursing, however. Apparently I did it a lot more when I was pregnant because I would hear the girls say something like "Just TAKE the d*mn thing!" when we were out somewhere. :blushing: So now we're all working on speaking more kindly to one another.

:grouphug: I am so glad that I am not alone. :grouphug:

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This reminds me of a story that a youth pastor friend told us. He was on a missions trip to Poland with his group from Cali and another youth group from Georgia. One of the first nights, Georgia's pastor pulls our friend aside to talk over a problem. One of the students is using bad language. Student said the S word. This being really out of character for that kid, our friend says, "he said sh*t?!" No code word. Georgia youth pastor sputters, "No! He said sucks!" Sucks was "the S word" for that group. Our friend let Georgia pastor know that Cali group would do their best to respect them, but sucks isn't considered a curse word in California and the students may slip up. Our friends said that the culture difference between the Georgia and Cali group was way more severe than the difference between Cali and Poland kids.

 

I say friggin all the time. And the S-word, too.

 

I use some of the more offensive words like @ss, but I do not use suck at all and friggin would be off limits for the kids. We pretty much say all the ones in the op's list. Obviously taking God's name in vain is a no-no. I also agree with the poster that said they don't say objectionable words in public. I don't want to offend others, so the words that I may allow at home, I wouldn't allow in public.

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My son has always had a somewhat emotionally explosive personality. As a baby and child he would explode in fits of temper at times (and at other times be just a sunny picture of love). He wanted to use swear words from the moment he heard them when very young (he went to preschool-kindy-school until age 7) and we were, while quite liberal ourselves, concerned that such a young child should be determined to swear. So we allowed him one word which he thought was really bad and he thought up himself- Bumhead. He used to use it frequently and we couldn't help thinking it was quite cute even though we tried to let him feel it was very borderline.

 

Nowadays, we all tend to use the word Sh*t fairly often and I dont make a fuss about it. Words like "fart" seem to be functions that actually need a name rather than expletives, to me!

 

I remember watching Battlestar Galactica and one of the main actresses used the word "frackin' " a lot, which I thought was somewhere between friggin' and that other word.

 

I tend to say "f*ck a duck" a fair bit. The kids don't swear a lot- we are fairly relaxed about it. When they start doing it too much I tell them it make them sound pretty crass and cheap, not smart.I do draw teh line sometimes and tell them to stop- I can tell they are testing the boundary so I give them one. I am sure my son swears with his friends, in typical boy fashion- as long as he knows when its appropriate, i dont feel to micromanage him over it- he is a teen now.

 

ETA- it is interesting to read the other posts- i think there are definite cultural differences in the strength of various words. Suck and crap are very moderate words here.

I remember a previous thread i think Laura started, where we discovered that fanny has a completely different meaning in different countries, too!

Edited by Peela
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I tend to be very liberal about most things. So, I've told my kiddos that there is no such thing as a bad word, BUT...there is a time and a place for everything. That one should express themselves depending on the company and setting. That it is more of a challenge to use other words than the usual suspects (the 7... are they still called that?).

 

We also talk often about other words, which to me are even more hurtful than the usual cuss words talked about here. How these words in general have power/impact and create ripples we often don't see.

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I tend to be very liberal about most things. So, I've told my kiddos that there is no such thing as a bad word, BUT...there is a time and a place for everything. That one should express themselves depending on the company and setting. That it is more of a challenge to use other words than the usual suspects (the 7... are they still called that?).

 

We also talk often about other words, which to me are even more hurtful than the usual cuss words talked about here. How these words in general have power/impact and create ripples we often don't see.

 

This is exactly my philosophy. I wish I had been able to express it so well.

 

I will definitely use what you said to talk with my children.

 

Thanks

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We do not allow any of the "traditional" curse words. We say "froggy" for fart, and "bum-bum" or "fan-fan" (fanny) instead of butt. We don't call anyone names, like "stupid", but it is allowed.

 

The really disgusting thing about me (am I really admitting this?) is that I think the word "dooky" is insanely funny and we say it all the time. DH hates it so we are trying to curb it, but the girls and I love to say it. How gross is that?

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