When did you start to make your son shower on his own?

[lulubelle]

My son is 6.5 and has no interest in cleaning himself. So, what age should I push him to do so? He is still taking baths with my help. Also, how about cutting his own nails?

[Pamela H in Texas]

He'll take over one day. Until then enjoy the time together :)

[JenneinCA]

My eight year old is still doing baths. He wants to play with the toys. I figure he can enjoy it while it is still fun.

[stripe]

You might consider if he wants to take a shower at all. My kids prefer a bucket style of bathing themselves (while soaking in the tub or just with the water running). They find the spray coming from so far up to be scary; I think one of those hand-held things might be nice to get one day.

[CookieMonster]

I don't think it's out of line that he's taking a bath at this age. But, the fact that he's not cleaning himself is immature. (I am guessing from the context of your question that you are more worried about the cleaning himself part than the bath or shower part.)

 

I would let him know that it's his job to clean himself. Send him in at the appointed time and expect him to clean himself.

 

If you can detect he's not following through, then there will be consequences.

 

To start with, he could go and bathe again. Be specific about what he hasn't done right, how to do it right, and send him back in again.

 

If he remains persistent about not cleaning himself (which I doubt will be the case) you could enforce this age-appropriate responsibility with further consequences.

 

He's got the motor skills, the cognitive ability, he's been shown how, he knows the drill. Now he needs to do it.

 

I say you should set up the expectation and watch him rise to the occasion.

 

___

ETA: Now, about the nail-cutting I'm not sure if that's something you should expect him to do or not. That requires quite a bit more skill. If you think he's ready to start doing it on his own, tell him so and make him. If you think he might need a year or two to perfect those fine motor skills, then wait.

Edited January 7, 2009 by CookieMonster

[neesek]

My ds was taking showers by himself by that age. I remember because he turned 6 in February, and our goal was to have him showering by himself by the time Baby #3 arrived. She was born in May, and he was going solo by then.

 

My dd, who is 6 now, is still taking baths, but only because she still needs help with her hair. She does wash herself, though. Maybe it is time for her to try everything on her own too, now that I think about it.

[Renee in NC]

All my dc take showers - no baths. We don't think that baths would be safe in our bathtub (it is really "squishy" underneath.) We rarely let them take baths before we moved either, so that is not the only reason.

 

My 2.5 and 4yo dd's take a shower together and I make sure they wash their hair well.

 

My 6 and 7yo ds's take a shower together with no supervision.

 

The older two are on their own - I don't even tell them when to bathe anymore for the most part.

[Tree House Academy]

My 9 year old ran his own water and bathed himself when he was 4! My 5 year old still doesn't do this! I think it just depends on the child and whether or not you feel he is capable of doing it himself.

[Kris]

My eight year old is still doing baths. He wants to play with the toys. I figure he can enjoy it while it is still fun.

 

I'm not sure about eight, but I know my son was still taking baths at six and seven because my mother had a fit. "He's just PLAYING in there!!!!"

 

Yeah? So?

 

:lol:

[Tess in the Burbs]

my son can take a shower by himself and do a good job. but he doesn't like to. he prefers the interaction from us. dh says no....i start with his hair and then leave him alone to finish. he can't do his own nails yet. I should let him try.....but man, it hurts when you get it wrong! so not sure yet about that.

 

my dd is 5 and she can wash her body in the shower but needs help on her hair.

 

we have the handheld shower thing so they have control of where the water is being sprayed from. neither like it from overhead as soap gets in their eyes

[LG Gone Wild]

My ds was 5 when he started showering by himself. DD is 6. I only delayed her because she needed help with her hair and plus, she just loves baths. I mean luuuuuuuvvvvvvvssssss baths but it has been drying out her skin. Showers only now.

[ereks mom]

He was happy to be considered old enough to take a shower by himself instead of a tub bath supervised by mom. By age 8, he was self-conscious about a female (mom!) seeing him naked. He was probably 12 or so before he trimmed his own nails, though. He had a hard time with our nail clippers for some reason. But we got him his own clippers and he started doing his own nails with no trouble.

Edited January 8, 2009 by ereks mom

[Pretty in Pink]

My 5yo can wash himself though I still do his hair. He prefers baths to showers but every once in a while he and our 2yo will shower together.

[MeanestMomInMidwest]

My 8 (almost 9) yr old showers independently. I do still remind him to wash everything. We have a mantra "head, face, belly, butt. Penis and pits, and don't forget the feet." Its a kind of sing-song thing.

My 7 yr old prefers baths, so I get the washy all sudsy and sing the mantra and he's good to go. I should note that my boys have buzz cuts and I bought the Suave 3-in-one soap (shampoo, conditioner & body soap), which makes washing much easier, especially when using those net washy things.

My 4yr old dd washes herself independently in the bath, except for hair. I also get the washy all sudsy for her.

 

ETA: Everyone in my family bites nails, so cutting is not an issue.

Edited January 8, 2009 by MeanestMomInMidwest

[joannqn]

My older two (just turned 7 and almost 9) have bathed themselves for about a year. They do everything from running their own water, to washing their body and hair.

 

They take baths rather than showers though. My son just prefers baths. My daughter, who will be 9 next week, is still very squeamish about getting water on her face so it will probably be a while before she'll be willing to try a shower.

 

I cut all nails.

[Hillary in KS]

About age 5 is when I start teaching ds to shampoo and rinse. They could all soap themselves before that.(Age 3.5 or 4?) I'd only step in to help with the hair.

[MelanieMac]

My dd- 6- still needs help with her long, long, long hair, but is great at sudsing and rinsing...

My ds- 10- has to be reminded to wash, reminded to do hair, reminded to rinse ALL THE WAY, reminded to get out (he loves to hang out in the shower until all the hot water is gone).

 

They both love baths but I still feel the need to supervise those a little closer (it is very deep and slippery) so I usually insist on showers so I can clean the bathroom and finish the laundry folding nearby.

 

ds can use nail clippers and does, but my dd is not there yet. I think my ds was around 9 when he started using the clippers on his own consistently.

[jamnkats]

I have absolutely never had to make a kid do anything but then again, we don't make our kids do anything. If I had a HUGE need for the kid to bathe/shower alone I'd express that need to the kid and see what ideas they might have to achieve that goal. Then we'd work on those (or other) strategies.

 

They're young for only so long. I can't remember the last time I sat with a kid in the bathtub. :)

[Suzanne in ABQ]

My ds was still playing in the bathtub until he was 9. He finally got bored with it, and started showering himself. I never saw a reason to push him. I was fairly confident he would not be playing with bath toys in high school. Plus, we have a really large tub, and it was just fun!

 

His little sister has taken over the tub, and he takes showers. He just decided to one day, and never went back.

I wouldn't sweat it.