My mom was in a car accident :(((((

[Kanin]

Hi everyone. Everything will be okay hopefully, but my mom was in a car accident on Thanksgiving night. A car swerved in to her land and hit her head on at 30 mph. She has a small fracture in her C2 - the front not the back, for medical folks - and a fractured sternum. She's also bruised from the seatbelt. Thank God the airbags went off. 

She had two CT scans with contrast, and a neurosurgeon was consulted on the scans. He said it's a small fracture in the neck and she will be fine wearing a cervical collar for 4-8 weeks. I'm pretty concerned about advice because neck injuries are scary...will the collar really immobilize her enough? I'm staying with her for a week at least to see how she does. 

UGH! And her new-to-her car is totaled 😞

Hope you guys had a better Thanksgiving than us 😞

[Melissa in Australia]

Sending hugs and positive thoughts 

[Innisfree]

That’s so scary; I’m so sorry. I hope she recovers quickly and insurance takes care of the car. 

[kbutton]

I’m glad they found the fracture and have a neurosurgeon on board. It’s fine to get a second opinion.

There are a several kinds of fractures, and it might help you feel more confident if they were to give you more context about that.

 

[KSera]

So scary! I'm glad she seems that she will be okay after healing up. I hope her healing happens quickly and she won't be in too much pain.

[Ottakee]

So sorry to hear that.

[TheReader]

I'm so sorry to hear that!

My grandma (87 at the time of the fall) fell out of bed and fractured 2 vertebrae in her neck; she was in a neck brace for 6 to 8 weeks, at which point then she was reevaluated and did end up having surgery.  The brace definitely immobilized her enough and she needed help for a while. 

Some things to think of:
- your mom won't be able to bend her head/tilt her head/etc. so may find she needs to sleep in a recliner or something similar 
- she may need help carrying things and doing things like laundry, etc., b/c of not being able to look down
- she won't likely be able to drive for the time she's in the neck brace (no ability to turn her head)
- she will probably need to drink from straws, etc., b/c of the brace

I think there may have been more, but that's what I remember off the top of my head.  Just sharing because, yes, it really will help. Praying for her recovery and that she not be in too much pain. 

[Tenaj]

They will train someone to help her with the brace - the padding will get gross and need switched out so it can get washed (my aunt had difficulty with food dropping down there).  They may give you (or you can ask) for an alternate brace she can wear for showering.  It's kind of scary taking it off and putting it back on but as long as she lays still and lets you (or someone else do the work, it's not hard to do but I would make sure that you practice at least once with someone watching.  It took a few times to get the hang of it for me.  

I stayed withy Aunt for a few days but after that would just stop in periodically to help with switching it out, washing, cleaning, etc.  If she lays flat in bed to sleep you may want to have something to help her pull herself up.  My aunt insisted she didn't need help with that move but ended up straining the break area and had to wear the brace for a longer period of time.

My aunt ended up wearing the neck brace for 12 weeks.  But she was around 81 when she broke her C2 with a fall.  

Best wishes for quick healing

 

[saraha]

Your poor mom! I’m sorry that happened 

[MEmama]

How scary! I hope she isn’t in pain and heals quickly ((hugs))

[math teacher]

So sorry about the accident. I hope she heals quickly and completely!

[TravelingChris]

Very sorry. Having your neck immobilized is definitely a learning curve and one issue is clothing.  Make sure she has enough clothing that doesn't involve pulling on over the neck - like clingy sweaters, etc.

I will pray for her. And yes, I would also recommend a second opinion.  Plus a good lawyer, to at least see if lawsuit 8s possible aga8nst the car owner.

[Kareni]

How horrible for your mother and for you. Sending healing wishes.

Regards,

Kareni

[cintinative]

Praying for wisdom for the doctors and healing for your mom.

You can always seek a second opinion once she is more stable.  Also, don't let the other person's insurance off the hook until you know for sure everything is adequately addressed. 

[mommyoffive]

Oh no, I am so sorry.  What a horrible Thanksgiving.  Sending lots of good thoughts to your mom.

[Scarlett]

@Kanin so they sent her home? I am so sorry, I know how terrifying this is. Do you live near her? 
I live 5 min from my parents but I was 4 hours away when they had their accident. Longest 4 hours of my life getting back to them. 
My parents were traveling 65 MPG down a main 4 lane highway when a 16 year old in a f150 pulled out right in front of them and they TBoned him.
 

My dad had a fractured sternum and ankle and spent two nights in the hospital. My mom was in ICU for 3 days and rehab for 7 more. Several surgeries. It was a very long haul for her. 
 

My dad recovered pretty quickly. I am hoping your mom does too. I am glad you can stay with her. 

[Kanin]

3 hours ago, Scarlett said:

@Kanin so they sent her home? I am so sorry, I know how terrifying this is. Do you live near her? 
I live 5 min from my parents but I was 4 hours away when they had their accident. Longest 4 hours of my life getting back to them. 
My parents were traveling 65 MPG down a main 4 lane highway when a 16 year old in a f150 pulled out right in front of them and they TBoned him.
 

My dad had a fractured sternum and ankle and spent two nights in the hospital. My mom was in ICU for 3 days and rehab for 7 more. Several surgeries. It was a very long haul for her. 
 

My dad recovered pretty quickly. I am hoping your mom does too. I am glad you can stay with her. 

Hi, yes, they sent her home the same night! Well, we weren't near either of our houses so we stayed in a hotel. It was horrible and I couldn't believe they let her go. Neither of us slept more than 20 minutes at a time for the whole night.

We live an hour apart, so my DH booked an Airbnb in my town so I can stay with her for a week. She can't stay with me because she's allergic to cats and she is miserable when she's in my house for too long (two cats). After that, I'm hoping she could stay alone at the Airbnb for the week after that, and then maybe we'll feel confident that she could be on her own.

That's so scary about your parents. Ughh! What a nightmare. Your poor mom especially, with the surgeries. That's a long long road.

I think my mom will recover fairly quickly. She's already looking better on day 2 than day 1. I'm so nervous about things going wrong though.

[Kanin]

Hi everyone, thank you so much for the kind words and sharing your experiences. ❤️

We called the insurance company. They said we don't need to do anything and they'll call back on Monday with more info. I tried calling the police dept but I was stuck on hold every time. I'm going to stop in today in person and see if I can get any information.

I think we'll go look at the car today. Mom wants to see it. I don't!!!!

I also took 3 days off work. Maybe will take the whole week. 

[Scarlett]

28 minutes ago, Kanin said:

Hi everyone, thank you so much for the kind words and sharing your experiences. ❤️

We called the insurance company. They said we don't need to do anything and they'll call back on Monday with more info. I tried calling the police dept but I was stuck on hold every time. I'm going to stop in today in person and see if I can get any information.

I think we'll go look at the car today. Mom wants to see it. I don't!!!!

I also took 3 days off work. Maybe will take the whole week. 

Most times it takes at least 10 days to get a police report, but you don’t usually need it to get the insurance claim started. If there is some dispute on liability the insurance companies will for sure get a copy. 
 

And yes it is infuriating when they send injured people home too soon. Especially elderly. 

[Ottakee]

Make sure you take advantage of any medical and home healthcare and home help benefits she might qualify for.  When I was in a minor accident I got help with transportation, laundry, and a few other things while I healed.

[TravelingChris]

I would be getting a lawyer

[Scarlett]

I would not get a lawyer before I hear what the settlement offer is. 

[MEmama]

@Kanin On the off chance this happened in my area and I can help in any way, please lmk. 
 

Thinking of you and your mom

[DawnM]

So glad she survived!   So sorry you are having to deal with this.

[Kanin]

20 hours ago, Ottakee said:

Make sure you take advantage of any medical and home healthcare and home help benefits she might qualify for.  When I was in a minor accident I got help with transportation, laundry, and a few other things while I healed.

That's a great idea, thank you!

[Kanin]

14 hours ago, Scarlett said:

I would not get a lawyer before I hear what the settlement offer is. 

Do you know how long that usually takes? This is our first car accident involving major damage to car and injuries.

[Scarlett]

45 minutes ago, Kanin said:

Do you know how long that usually takes? This is our first car accident involving major damage to car and injuries.

It really depends on your state. In OK my parents property damage portion (the car) was settled with in weeks very satisfactorily.
 

The medical took a very long time (6-8 months)) but my mom’s injuries were substantial. The at fault insurance gave mom full policy limits. They could have sued the teenagers family personally but they had no interest in that and I don’t blame them. 
 

What insurance does your mom have and what insurance does the at fault party have? 
 

[Kanin]

On 12/1/2024 at 9:42 AM, Scarlett said:

What insurance does your mom have and what insurance does the at fault party have? 

Thanks. Mom has AAA for insurance. Not sure about the other person. She's talking to insurance right now. 

She was so out of it after the accident that they didn't exchange insurance. I'm going to the police today to get more info.

Praying that it all works out. I'm so nervous. Mom is on a super low fixed income. I'm sure she has the most bare-bones insurance possible for money reasons. Ugh. Guess who is getting good car insurance from her daughter from now on??

[Scarlett]

Oh that will slow things down since she did not get the at fault party’s insurance info. The police report should have that info though. Let’s hope it is good insurance and she won’t even have to  worry about filing with her own insurance. 

[Kanin]

Making some progress. We got the police report which states that the other driver was at fault. Mom has gotten calls from her insurance, and the other driver's insurance (both auto and medical people called).

Now we need to send her car title to the other driver's insurance company. She doesn't even have it because she just bought the car two weeks ago. Hoping the DMV can give it to us. 

Mom seems more mobile today. She is going to want to go home and be on her own soon, I'm sure (she lives alone). 

[Scarlett]

30 minutes ago, Kanin said:

Making some progress. We got the police report which states that the other driver was at fault. Mom has gotten calls from her insurance, and the other driver's insurance (both auto and medical people called).

Now we need to send her car title to the other driver's insurance company. She doesn't even have it because she just bought the car two weeks ago. Hoping the DMV can give it to us. 

Mom seems more mobile today. She is going to want to go home and be on her own soon, I'm sure (she lives alone). 

Your moms  property settlement should include the sales tax she paid for they new vehicle. 

[Kanin]

12 hours ago, Scarlett said:

Your moms  property settlement should include the sales tax she paid for they new vehicle. 

Good call!!

[Kanin]

Well guys, I realized that I haven't spent this much time with my mother in a long, long time. Like... since I lived at home. Listening to her is like listening to my own thoughts spoken out loud. Every little thought or emotion is just said out loud. Wow! I'm not sure if I need to be more expressive or if she needs to put a cork in it 😅

Edited Tuesday at 07:13 PM by Kanin

[TexasProud]

Glad you are able to be with her. Praying all of the paperwork with all of this stuff goes well and that her recovery goes smoothly!

[Kanin]

1 hour ago, TexasProud said:

Glad you are able to be with her. Praying all of the paperwork with all of this stuff goes well and that her recovery goes smoothly!

Thank you so much!! The insurance companies are fast. Her insurance and the other driver's insurance have both called multiple times over the past few days. DH and I have coached her to say that she'll think about an offer they make. I hope it goes well, too.