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How should I feel about this?


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I had an ETR meeting this morning with the school district. My advocate was there, but our SLP never showed. We have been working with this SLP since last May and she fully understood that getting an IEP was our goal and her work with my son was very important to the ETR discussion. 

She never notified me that she couldn't come. She did respond later this morning that she had a medical emergency late last night and meant to email me.  I don't know if the owner of the SLP practice was informed that she would be out. I know that they were consulting about how to address the ETR in the meeting today. 

The district was gracious and allowed us to keep a tentative (overflow) meeting for next Wednesday. I told her she would be able to discuss things then. She replied that she has clients scheduled. She has known about this other meeting (it was actually the original meeting time) for at least a month.  

(So the whole story was the school district put forward 5/22 which we agreed to, and then they said it was the last week of school and could they move it earlier. So since my advocate had an appt this morning we met at 7:15 this a.m. with the understanding that if we needed to run over we would finish the meeting next week on Wed. My SLP knew all of this.)

So, tell me--how should I feel about this?  I am frustrated with my SLP but maybe I am out of line.  I do feel bad that she had a medical issue.  

 

 

Edited by cintinative
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In some industries, there are not clear ways to handle emergency absences except cancellations. DH is in a not flexible job in this way.

I would be upset if the absence was not an emergency, and you were not informed in a timely manner, but it sounds like this was not the case.

It is hard to know if her emergency last night meant lost sleep, and if she had access to her contacts, etc. It’s not at all hard to lose track of stuff when it really hits the fan, and it could be that she was just exhausted. We do our best in emergencies, but it happens. 

I would be frustrated no matter what because it’s the end of the year, and you need this settled. It’s normal to be frustrated even if the situation couldn’t be helped.

 

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Regardless of what her situation was for this mornings meeting, it sounds like she should have been available next week as well, and should not have scheduled clients during the time of the "overflow" meeting.  I would be annoyed about that.   An emergency can't be helped but she knew the other time may also be needed and should have kept that open.

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37 minutes ago, Wheres Toto said:

Regardless of what her situation was for this mornings meeting, it sounds like she should have been available next week as well, and should not have scheduled clients during the time of the "overflow" meeting.  I would be annoyed about that.   An emergency can't be helped but she knew the other time may also be needed and should have kept that open.

I think I didn’t catch this part. That would have me very upset and calling her boss, honestly.

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1 hour ago, kbutton said:

I think I didn’t catch this part. That would have me very upset and calling her boss, honestly.

I just forwarded the email to her boss where she said she could come.  Unfortunately it does sound like she is quite ill and so, in the end, it may not matter if she could cancel clients or not. The owner of the company might be able to sit in for a half hour. It's sort of a mess.  

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I've never had my private SLPs need to come to an ETR or IEP, and I've had some *severely* contested ETR and IEP meetings, with lawyers, the whole nine yards. 

An SLP is a very low powered person in the room. I would get her report and move on. She shouldn't need to be there if her report is clearly written. The school can accept it. 

Are you *sure* you need the SLP data? If you're in Ohio and wanting the autism scholarship, the legal requirements have changed. Is this for something else? I'm just trying to understand a scenario why the SLP is so very, very vital. Usually the psych or the school representative is the most powerful person in the room. 

Problem solve, don't take it personally. To me your SLP sounds like she doesn't want to show up, and it's possible that you've been asking for something that is NOT the norm or that she thinks she should NOT have to do. So frankly, rather than taking it personally, I'd confirm with a lawyer exactly what is necessary. Like I said, in so many years now I've NEVER been compelled to bring my private SLPs in. We still currently use at least 3 and have fights that have CENTERED on reports and data from my private SLPs and STILL they never had to come in. They write the reports, the lawyers on both sides look at them, and it's done. They don't call the private SLPs liars, if that makes sense. Now a private PSYCH I've taken in, but that's because you are taking on the most powerful person in the room. The SLP doesn't have power, only data, at least in my experience.

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37 minutes ago, cintinative said:

I just forwarded the email to her boss where she said she could come.  Unfortunately it does sound like she is quite ill and so, in the end, it may not matter if she could cancel clients or not. The owner of the company might be able to sit in for a half hour. It's sort of a mess.  

I get how stressful this is and that you probably have a lot on the line. Btdt, sigh. I suggest you make certain your advocate is giving you completely correct advice. Maybe move from advocate to lawyer if it's this stressful and unclear. We did pro bono lawyers for a while and finally got the best lawyer we could find in the state. One file review by that top of the line lawyer and everything changed, rays of sunshine. 

It's possible you have no mess. You need data, but I highly doubt they're going to call your SLP a liar if she writes a strong report. I would be trying to figure out why this has not been reduced to facts and data. You bring the facts and data. There is no persuasion, just the facts, the data, the law. 

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15 hours ago, PeterPan said:

There is no persuasion, just the facts, the data, the law. 

Then why do you have a lawyer? People management always involves persuasion if the district doesn’t want to grant an IEP.

If the student needs language work and only language work in the IEP, I don’t understand why an SLP is not the most important person in the room. 

 

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On 5/15/2024 at 7:02 PM, kbutton said:

Then why do you have a lawyer? People management always involves persuasion if the district doesn’t want to grant an IEP.

If the student needs language work and only language work in the IEP, I don’t understand why an SLP is not the most important person in the room.

Lawyers are specialists in the law, and also that arguments can exist over what the facts are. Especially when reducing a matter to facts and data could cost someone money they don't want to spend.

An SLP can be the most important person in the room if the situation revolves around the particular facts and data the SLP has. In the absence of perfect communication or action (OP's situation sounds imperfect at minimum), it is not always clear what the exact sticking point is for a given IEP discussion ahead of time, even for the families of the person possessing the IEP.

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2 hours ago, ieta_cassiopeia said:

Lawyers are specialists in the law, and also that arguments can exist over what the facts are. Especially when reducing a matter to facts and data could cost someone money they don't want to spend.

An SLP can be the most important person in the room if the situation revolves around the particular facts and data the SLP has. In the absence of perfect communication or action (OP's situation sounds imperfect at minimum), it is not always clear what the exact sticking point is for a given IEP discussion ahead of time, even for the families of the person possessing the IEP.

I do understand this, but it’s unclear to me why PeterPan is saying what she is saying about data then.

If it requires an attorney to tell the district to look at the data in a broader light, then it’s not just data and the law anymore.

2e kids face the strict NO of the letter of the law all the time to their detriment.

If I didn’t live in the district I live in, I would need an attorney. 

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