Frustrated: Regarding inquiry about university admissions requirements. WWYD?

[pitterpatter]

Yesterday, I filled out a form on my alma mater's website requesting clarification about their admission requirements regarding acceptable coursework. My daughter, who is finishing up 10th grade right now, is strongly considering this university. I had a feeling it was a bit of trap when the form asked for the prospective student's contact info along with the person's info doing the inquiring. So, of course, they totally disregarded my contact info, and e-mailed my daughter. And, of course, they answered none of my very specific questions. They asked my daughter to call them. My daughter is so not calling them. (She doesn't even know what I asked.) And, I have zero desire to call them either...I just want answers via e-mail, hence the reason I used a web form and didn't call them in the first place. This kind of thing is a major pet peeve of mine.

What do I do? I don't want DD to get a black mark next to her name, but she's not calling them. I do need the info, as I am mapping out classes for DD's junior year and don't want to make a mistake. Can I just e-mail the person back via my own e-mail and explain that I was asking as DD's teacher/counselor? So frustrated. I seriously just want to say forget it, she can go somewhere else. That's how badly the e-mail rubbed me. I didn't like the wording at all.

[cintinative]

I have very limited experience but that does seem a bit strange to me.

I like to have things in writing so I can refer to them later. 

Maybe you could send an email saying you are her counselor and you are seeking clarity on the admissions requirements in writing so they can be used for future reference?

I will be curious to see how others advise you as you and I are in very similar spots with our kids' ages. I have definitely reached out to colleges about admissions requirements or specific programs myself on multiple occasions.  

[pitterpatter]

Yes, exactly! I don't have to remember what was said with e-mail. I can view it as many times as needed. (My brain isn't the best these days. Lol.)

The form asked for her high school, so I put "homeschool." Maybe I shouldn't have. I thought it best to be transparent, though. 🤷‍♀️

5 minutes ago, cintinative said:

I like to have things in writing so I can refer to them later. 

Maybe you could send an email saying you are her counselor and you are seeking clarity on the admissions requirements in writing so they can be used for future reference?

 

[kokotg]

I'd go with just e-mailing them back and explaining and asking again. I wouldn't worry that she's not going to call them...some colleges have extremely pushy admissions departments--I find it really off-putting, too, but I guess it must work a lot of the time or they wouldn't keep doing it?

[alisha]

I wonder if it might have been a student worker whose job is to reply to these inquiries from a students perspective (and obviously, they probalby don't have the same manners under their belt as a seasoned, experienced adult). 

I would do as cintinative suggested and email them back explaining the entire situation-that your daughter is x years old and not ready to be interviewing colleges yet, but as her advisor, you need this info to direct her in class planning. 

In fact, since that email address might not get you to the person you need, I would see if there's a staff directory and see if you can find an admissions counselor to email. (Usually, there are emails listed)

And also explain about needing it in writing so you can refer to it as you guide and plan. 

They shouldn't have any problem with that, I think doing a web form sent it to a specific area of the college that isn't used to answering these types of questions, so try another area.

Keep us updated. 🙂 

[pitterpatter]

She's not a student. Her e-mail signature states "Admissions Evaluator," but I found her in a database of salaries online that says "Student Support Specialist I." I looked it up. It's the lowest position on the job hierarchy scale, aside from student workers. The position is literally to answer these types of questions plus various types of data entry. I guess I'll try e-mailing her tomorrow or this weekend when I'm in a better frame of mind. I'll let you know how it goes.

1 hour ago, alisha said:

I wonder if it might have been a student worker whose job is to reply to these inquiries from a students perspective (and obviously, they probalby don't have the same manners under their belt as a seasoned, experienced adult). 

I would do as cintinative suggested and email them back explaining the entire situation-that your daughter is x years old and not ready to be interviewing colleges yet, but as her advisor, you need this info to direct her in class planning. 

In fact, since that email address might not get you to the person you need, I would see if there's a staff directory and see if you can find an admissions counselor to email. (Usually, there are emails listed)

And also explain about needing it in writing so you can refer to it as you guide and plan. 

They shouldn't have any problem with that, I think doing a web form sent it to a specific area of the college that isn't used to answering these types of questions, so try another area.

Keep us updated. 🙂 

[BusyMom5]

You can message me, but generally I just call admissions and ask if there is an admissions councilor that is more familiar with homeschoolers.  Sometimes there will be one that has more experience with homeschoolers.  You shouldn't even have to give your DDs info if you are asking questions as a school councilor- like how classes are classified, what items they will request,  if anything needs verified (usually no).  

Also try to look for the info you are seeking- Google name of school and your topic.  Sometimes Google is better than the college website searches.  

 

[ScoutTN]

I’d call as a counselor and be patient until I got someone who actually knows what he or she is talking about. 
 

Or start over from a different email address, giving zero personal info. 
 

Agree with looking for more info on the internet. Admissions requirements/expectations are on many colleges’ websites. That is pretty standard info.  You could also post on the college forum here - someone may know the answer to your question, esp some who work in college admissions or are counselors helping homeschoolers through the college process.

[regentrude]

I would just call them and ask to speak to the person who can actually answer my question.
Chances are, the person either misunderstood or only knew how to answer routine questions. The low-level admissions evaluator is the one that checks boxes but won't have a deep understanding of the required coursework, let alone homeschool specific questions.
You can of course respond to her email as the counselor and ask for it to be forwarded to the person who can actually answer it, but a  phone call would accomplish that much quicker. At least, you could ask who the best person to contact is and email them directly.

Is the info you need not on the website?

[Sebastian (a lady)]

It is completely appropriate for you to contact colleges in your role as a counselor to ask about admissions requirements and required or preferred documentation for homeschoolers. 

Look at the admissions staff directory for the person who either handles homeschool apps or is the regional rep for your area. If the person you reach out to can't answer, they should know who can.

Also if answers from colleges seem off, ask follow up questions. I had a nonsensical exchange with one rep, until he finally said that he didn't read homeschool apps, was incorrect in his previous 2-3 emails, and would refer me to the rep who read homeschool applications. 

[Reefgazer]

On 5/25/2023 at 9:02 AM, pitterpatter said:

Yesterday, I filled out a form on my alma mater's website requesting clarification about their admission requirements regarding acceptable coursework. My daughter, who is finishing up 10th grade right now, is strongly considering this university. I had a feeling it was a bit of trap when the form asked for the prospective student's contact info along with the person's info doing the inquiring. So, of course, they totally disregarded my contact info, and e-mailed my daughter. And, of course, they answered none of my very specific questions. They asked my daughter to call them. My daughter is so not calling them. (She doesn't even know what I asked.) And, I have zero desire to call them either...I just want answers via e-mail, hence the reason I used a web form and didn't call them in the first place. This kind of thing is a major pet peeve of mine.

What do I do? I don't want DD to get a black mark next to her name, but she's not calling them. I do need the info, as I am mapping out classes for DD's junior year and don't want to make a mistake. Can I just e-mail the person back via my own e-mail and explain that I was asking as DD's teacher/counselor? So frustrated. I seriously just want to say forget it, she can go somewhere else. That's how badly the e-mail rubbed me. I didn't like the wording at all.

Have DD email them back with your questions, explaining that you are her counselor and need these questions answered.  Have her also explain that you both prfer answers in writing in order to refer back to them later.  I also hate when colleges do this; it's shady to by-pass a counselor that way in order to get more info from an inexperienced young adult.

Edited May 30 by Reefgazer

[pitterpatter]

What kind of info do they want? What's the game?

4 hours ago, Reefgazer said:

I also hate when colleges do this; it's shady to by-pass a counselor that way in order to get more info from an inexperienced young adult.

 

[Reefgazer]

On 5/30/2023 at 10:05 PM, pitterpatter said:

What kind of info do they want? What's the game?

 

Nothing specific.  They are trying to get unfiltered, "uncurated" responses that have not been filtered through an adult.

[Farrar]

It's appropriate for you to call and ask things as the homeschooler counselor, but even from school counselors... colleges want to hear from students most often, not the adults who are advocating for them. They don't see them as "inexperienced minors." They want independent young people who advocate for themselves. Not "inexperienced" students who don't even know what the parents are asking.

Different admissions offices will handle this sort of thing differently and some are great at responding to emails while others are better if you call. But generally speaking, I suggest approaching the process by asking yourself every single time if your student can ask instead of you. And also treading gently with admissions because pushy parents is something they simply do not like, even if you're technically in the counselor role.

[EKS]

If I had an actual homeschool counselor question (something about how they wanted the transcript, for example), I called and didn't identify myself.  Otherwise I had my student contact them.

[Aliqout]

I doubt your daughter will get a "black mark" for not responding, but opening a conversation opens the potential for her  is to stand out when it comes time to apply. 

 Universities generally treat their students and perspective students as adults. They have little interst in dealing with parents, or, if it is a selective school, with students who rely on their parents to ask questions and advocate for them.  Selective schools are interested in independent self motivated students interested in taking control of their future. 

As a homeschooling parent it will be an uphill battle for them to see you in a similar role as a high-school counselor, and nor as a parent advocate for your child. 

When asking about for advice on things that have no publicly available written policy, lower level employees will be hesitant to put anything in writing. I would just call the admissions department (or better yet have your daughter call). 

 

Edited June 11 by Aliqout

[KimberlyW]

As the former but fairly recent (left in 2022) director of admissions at a small college in a major collegiate city I just wanted to chime in on the you v. your daughter part:

It certainly wasn't a black mark against anyone when our communications went unanswered but we were often wary of parents who communicated more than their students. We view them as budding adults and so expect them to drive the conversations they are interested in. If they aren't doing that we assume that they either (1) aren't actually interested or (2) lack the independence necessary to be successful in college. Obviously, we don't use that info to make major decisions but it can be a tipping point for applicants on the edge in committee. I would highly suggest your student start trying to communicate with the schools she wants to attend. Bonus: once she starts she'll realize that most everyone who works in admissions is very nice (truthful is another story 😅).

ETA: For advisor/ counselor type questions, just identify that that's the role you're functioning in for your homeschool and most will immediately switch gears and know where to direct your question.

Edited June 12 by KimberlyW
Pushed enter too quickly