Oh vey- teens, s3x, and bc

[Soror]

deleted for privacy

Edited May 19, 2023 by Soror

[YaelAldrich]

You can't show them the odds of a healthy, fertile teenager getting pregnant? Because that is not a low number. Anecdotally, when we tried to get pregnant (starting at age 27),  we succeeded in the first month twice,  the third time in two months, and as a geriatric mother (lol 38 years old) it took six months. 

I would bet you good money she'll be pregnant within six months. And her parents don't care?  

[prairiewindmomma]

“What is your plan for when you become pregnant?” “Are your health care providers aware so that you can get regular STI testing?”

[Farrar]

What's the reasoning for not using bc when she's already active and already admitted to not practicing safer s*x? I don't get it. Is the rhetoric around the evils of bc so strong that people think it's worse than getting pregnant when you don't want to be as a teen?!?

It's like, oh, I'm starving, but I don't really like spaghetti with pesto so I'll pass and just, I dunno, keel over and die instead.

[Katy]

That is so unfair to the poor baby who deserves parents who want him or her. 

[prairiewindmomma]

Good decision making rarely gets people on your caseload, iykwim. Hugs!

[livetoread]

I don't know if this applies, but I grew up in a conservative Christian environment where sex before marriage was wrong, end of story. I knew plenty of couples who didn't use birth control or at least didn't make a commitment to use something that meant going out of your way to get it etc, because that would mean they were planning on having sex which was a sin and also slutty on the part of the girl. If they felt like sex was wrong, but they just got carried away sometimes without planning for it to happen, that was better then saying, "Yep, going to come up with my plan for sinning now." It was a denial that allowed them some semblance of feeling better, and yes, there were pregnancies.

Edited May 17, 2023 by livetoread

[pinball]

18 minutes ago, Katy said:

That is so unfair to the poor baby who deserves parents who want him or her. 

Sometimes teens WANT to get pregnant and WANT their babies and that is why they don’t use BC

 

[teachermom2834]

Well there are some teens that want babies. I know everyone jumped to it being a conservative Christian thing for this girl and her mom to not want birth control but OP didn’t actually say that was the reason. Usually those folks don’t admit to being active. 

What was the reason? 

[Mrs Tiggywinkle Again]

22 minutes ago, pinball said:

Sometimes teens WANT to get pregnant and WANT their babies and that is why they don’t use BC

 

I had a cousin who purposely got pregnant in her teens. Her best friend did as well. It was completely planned as she went off birth control.

Baby daddy is in prison and she’s actually done a great job raising her daughter, but my cousin will be the first person to tell you this was the dumbest decision in the world.

It happens.

[ArteHaus]

Well, good for them. Hormonal birth control is very unhealthy, especially for a teenager who is still developing. I would never put my daughter on birth control, ever. 

Some people may realize that there are natural birth control methods, that are, well, natural, and completely  healthy and harm free to adults and developing teenagers. So, perhaps the mother/daughter are considering this as the best option.

Maybe she wouldn’t mind having a baby. I don’t know how old the young lady is, but the desire to have children is…natural, especially for an older teenager (assuming you aren’t talking about a 13 year old). Babies don’t ruin lives, but I guess that is dependent on one’s perception. 

I have never used birth control, thankfully. After 18 years of marriage, we have only used natural methods, and I have three planned children. So, I think that teenagers could use real sex education, especially a young girl. Learning and tracking one’s ovulation cycle and applying that knowledge, is a lot different than swallowing a synthetic hormone, which teaches no responsibility towards sex or one’s body.

 

 

 

[KungFuPanda]

1 hour ago, ArteHaus said:

Well, good for them. Hormonal birth control is very unhealthy, especially for a teenager who is still developing. I would never put my daughter on birth control, ever. 

Some people may realize that there are natural birth control methods, that are, well, natural, and completely  healthy and harm free to adults and developing teenagers. So, perhaps the mother/daughter are considering this as the best option.

Maybe she wouldn’t mind having a baby. I don’t know how old the young lady is, but the desire to have children is…natural, especially for an older teenager (assuming you aren’t talking about a 13 year old). Babies don’t ruin lives, but I guess that is dependent on one’s perception. 

I have never used birth control, thankfully. After 18 years of marriage, we have only used natural methods, and I have three planned children. So, I think that teenagers could use real sex education, especially a young girl. Learning and tracking one’s ovulation cycle and applying that knowledge, is a lot different than swallowing a synthetic hormone, which teaches no responsibility towards sex or one’s body.

 

 

 

What just happened?!?!

[Frances]

2 hours ago, pinball said:

Sometimes teens WANT to get pregnant and WANT their babies and that is why they don’t use BC

 

Since she’s sporadically using protection, she seems undecided at best about getting pregnant. As an unmarried teen, what seems more important than her desire to be pregnant (if that’s actually the case) is whether she is ready and capable of being a good parent and providing for a baby. And ideally, she’d be in a long term, stable relationship with the father of the baby. Lots of teens have immature desires. It doesn’t mean the adults in their lives shouldn’t help guide them to better, more mature decisions, especially when it may have lifelong consequences for an innocent child.

[Heartstrings]

3 hours ago, Soror said:

I can't with people.

Here people are complaining we have too much sex education yet...

I have a  s3xually active teenage client that doesn't want to do bc and Mom doesn't want her to go on either. 

They don't even use 'protection' every time. 

I guess I'm a damn dirty liberal but this is just stupidity. 

Let's just ignore the problem and hope for the best. Great plan. That always ends so well. 

Start calling her Granny.  She needs to get used to it.  

[Heartstrings]

3 hours ago, Katy said:

That is so unfair to the poor baby who deserves parents who want him or her. 

Lots of people have unexpected babies and things turn out ok.  Unplanned is not the same as unwanted.  You have 9 whole months to get used to the idea.  You can love, treasure, and do a good job raising children that were unplanned.    
 

Signed, a former teen mom who thinks things ended up pretty ok.  That baby is now 21 and pretty awesome.   

 

ETA: I don’t advise it, of course.  But it’s not all doom and gloom and poor outcomes.  

Edited May 18, 2023 by Heartstrings

[Frances]

2 hours ago, ArteHaus said:

I have never used birth control, thankfully. After 18 years of marriage, we have only used natural methods, and I have three planned children. So, I think that teenagers could use real sex education, especially a young girl. Learning and tracking one’s ovulation cycle and applying that knowledge, is a lot different than swallowing a synthetic hormone, which teaches no responsibility towards sex or one’s body.

 

 

 

Taking oral birth control does demonstrate responsibility towards sex and one’s body, even if it isn’t necessarily teaching it.

[Frances]

12 minutes ago, Heartstrings said:

Lots of people have unexpected babies and things turn out ok.  Unplanned is not the same as unwanted.  You have 9 whole months to get used to the idea.  You can love, treasure, and do a good job raising children that were unplanned.    
 

Signed, a former teen mom who thinks things ended up pretty ok.  That baby is now 21 and pretty awesome.   
 

And some teens have unplanned babies and things don’t turn out so good. It sounds like the teen in question is already in a situation where she needs outside intervention in her life, so the odds are already stacked against her. It would seem far better for her to focus on maturing and achieving her own goals before she brings an innocent baby into the world.

[BusyMom5]

Considering that this young person is on the radar of a social worker, I'm assuming other family dysfunction.   I'm sad for this girl and her baby- bc she will have one.  I do not get this at all.  

I know that using hormonal BC isn't ideal,  and I haven't used it in my marriage either- only 1 unplanned pregnancy 😅  But there is a very big difference between a responsible young woman monitoring her cycle, in a stable relationship with a partner who is ready for a child if one should unexpectedly arrive and a young woman who just isn't worrying about it.  NFP takes a lot of dedication and discipline.   

[Katy]

2 hours ago, ArteHaus said:

Well, good for them. Hormonal birth control is very unhealthy, especially for a teenager who is still developing. I would never put my daughter on birth control, ever. 

Some people may realize that there are natural birth control methods, that are, well, natural, and completely  healthy and harm free to adults and developing teenagers. So, perhaps the mother/daughter are considering this as the best option.

Maybe she wouldn’t mind having a baby. I don’t know how old the young lady is, but the desire to have children is…natural, especially for an older teenager (assuming you aren’t talking about a 13 year old). Babies don’t ruin lives, but I guess that is dependent on one’s perception. 

I have never used birth control, thankfully. After 18 years of marriage, we have only used natural methods, and I have three planned children. So, I think that teenagers could use real sex education, especially a young girl. Learning and tracking one’s ovulation cycle and applying that knowledge, is a lot different than swallowing a synthetic hormone, which teaches no responsibility towards sex or one’s body.

What evidence do you have that hormonal birth control is very unhealthy?  Let me guess... you heard it in a class about natural family planning.

I'm really tired of religious propaganda being paraded around as reliable scientific or health information. Treating religious edicts designed to control people as gospel is dangerous and has led to a lot of unnecessary death and suffering.

I'm not saying that anything doesn't have side effects, and I myself have posted here several times over the years that sometimes the pill given not for birth control but for treating things like disabling periods or repeated large burst ovarian cysts can also cause hormonal depression. But the idea that something that has both positive (lowers breast and ovarian cancer rates) and negative (can cause blood clots, especially in older women who smoke) side effects is anything that should be decided by anyone except a woman and her doctor.

This is the kind of false information that is leading some politicians to ban birth control.  Better to keep us all at home, barefoot and pregnant, whether that is what we want or not.  I'm really tired of paternalistic lies trying to control my or anyone else's body. Whether it's for controlling women or lying on TicTok so some moron with NO health education can get more clicks and earn more advertising money peddling completely false information.

[Terabith]

I once talked to a woman who said straight up that she'd rather her teenage daughter (very young, 12 or 13) got pregnant and had a baby than teach her anything about sex. 

[livetoread]

4 hours ago, teachermom2834 said:

I know everyone jumped to it being a conservative Christian thing for this girl and her mom to not want birth control but OP didn’t actually say that was the reason.

I was the only one who mentioned the conservative Christian angle, and I purposefully started by saying I didn't know if it applied or not, so I'm not sure where this is coming from. Just wanted to offer a perspective that may or may not be useful in understanding why some people may not want birth control. 

[Katy]

I knew couples when I was young who got pregnant on purpose because they wanted to get married and their parents didn't approve. Taking birth control and being responsible until they were adults who paid their own way in the world would mean deciding to sin, but accidentally on purpose having sex and getting pregnant, thereby thwarting their parents plans for them wasn't sin at all. It boggles the mind.

[fraidycat]

4 hours ago, KungFuPanda said:

What just happened?!?!

The Holocaust denier has entered the chat is what has happened. Posts by this poster don't require much more than a cursory glance and an eyeroll, IMO. 

[Ting Tang]

I’d have to step in and say pregnancy, (possibly abortion,) and marriage are all situations to avoid in your teen years. You’re probably not allowed to be so direct, but the parent is not doing the right thing. Natural family planning is for old married (or I suppose single but more established) people who are okay with a little error in timing. Just my opinion. 

Edited May 18, 2023 by Ting Tang

[Soror]

On 5/17/2023 at 7:53 PM, BusyMom5 said:

Considering that this young person is on the radar of a social worker, I'm assuming other family dysfunction.   I'm sad for this girl and her baby- bc she will have one.  I do not get this at all.  

I know that using hormonal BC isn't ideal,  and I haven't used it in my marriage either- only 1 unplanned pregnancy 😅  But there is a very big difference between a responsible young woman monitoring her cycle, in a stable relationship with a partner who is ready for a child if one should unexpectedly arrive and a young woman who just isn't worrying about it.  NFP takes a lot of dedication and discipline.   

Exactly. We started using NFP at least 20 yrs ago- since then it has only been NFP- nothing else. I'm not a huge fan of hormonal BC. BUT there is no way in hell I'd recommend that as a viable option to this girl. Nope. Nope. Nope. 

On 5/17/2023 at 7:31 PM, Heartstrings said:

Lots of people have unexpected babies and things turn out ok.  Unplanned is not the same as unwanted.  You have 9 whole months to get used to the idea.  You can love, treasure, and do a good job raising children that were unplanned.    
 

Signed, a former teen mom who thinks things ended up pretty ok.  That baby is now 21 and pretty awesome.   

 

ETA: I don’t advise it, of course.  But it’s not all doom and gloom and poor outcomes.  

Of course, it isn't all doom and gloom but it certainly isn't ideal. The safety net in America is crap as it is and it will make her life that much harder (and she is already in poverty).

On 5/17/2023 at 3:42 PM, YaelAldrich said:

You can't show them the odds of a healthy, fertile teenager getting pregnant? Because that is not a low number. Anecdotally, when we tried to get pregnant (starting at age 27),  we succeeded in the first month twice,  the third time in two months, and as a geriatric mother (lol 38 years old) it took six months. 

I would bet you good money she'll be pregnant within six months. And her parents don't care?  

Good idea- I'm going to leave them with some statistics.

 

 

Edited May 19, 2023 by Soror

[Clarita]

6 hours ago, ArteHaus said:

Maybe she wouldn’t mind having a baby. I don’t know how old the young lady is, but the desire to have children is…natural, especially for an older teenager (assuming you aren’t talking about a 13 year old). Babies don’t ruin lives, but I guess that is dependent on one’s perception. 

I know several women who have had children in their teens. Their lives turned out fine and they were wonderful mothers who raised wonderful children. Also though none of them have ever said "Having a baby at 16 was the best decision of my life!" nor would they ever suggest that for anyone. Every single one of them tell their daughters not to have a baby in their teens.

[sweet2ndchance]

2 hours ago, Soror said:

I straight up asked this girl if she wanted to have a baby and she emphatically said no.

Did you ask in front of her mother? Even if you didn't, if the area is as conservative as you say, she may know that the "right" answer to the question is no at her age. I wouldn't say that just because she says no that she truly means it given her actions.

I would have told an adult the same thing when I was in my late teens but truth was I secretly wanted a baby. At the time, in my very dysfunctional family, it seemed like the only way in my teenage mind to get out of my parent's house and their rules. Silly, I know now but I did say my family was very dysfunctional. I got pregnant at 18, the summer after high school graduation, and had my oldest son at just turned 19. I don't regret it per se but I do wish I knew then what I know now and that I could just walk away from a toxic family against my parent's rules and the society I lived in at the time's expectations. I know now that I had other family elsewhere that would have gladly taken me in and encouraged me that I could make it on my own, with or without a child. My parent's house or married weren't the only valid options as I had been conditioned to believe at the time. Of course there is much more to the story but that's the gist of it.

I just wanted to point out that teens know the "right" answer to these type of questions and may even be able to convincingly give the "right" answer when confronted but I wouldn't trust even an emphatic no if the teen is sexually active and not using protection of some kind. She knows, even if she won't admit it, that it is a possibility and may even want it to "accidentally" happen.

[Carrie12345]

4 hours ago, Clarita said:

I know several women who have had children in their teens. Their lives turned out fine and they were wonderful mothers who raised wonderful children. Also though none of them have ever said "Having a baby at 16 was the best decision of my life!" nor would they ever suggest that for anyone. Every single one of them tell their daughters not to have a baby in their teens.

I sidestepped teen pregnancy and got pregnant at 20 instead, lol. Wonderful life, wonderful children, etc. came with lots of extra hardships and much slower than it could have otherwise. Why would anyone want that for their child/grandchild?!?  
As someone who could support a teen through that, it would be terribly irresponsible for me, with a fully formed frontal lobe, to not advise against it.

[pinball]

10 hours ago, Frances said:

Since she’s sporadically using protection, she seems undecided at best about getting pregnant. As an unmarried teen, what seems more important than her desire to be pregnant (if that’s actually the case) is whether she is ready and capable of being a good parent and providing for a baby. And ideally, she’d be in a long term, stable relationship with the father of the baby. Lots of teens have immature desires. It doesn’t mean the adults in their lives shouldn’t help guide them to better, more mature decisions, especially when it may have lifelong consequences for an innocent child.

Interesting. If only this tactic was applied in all situations involving teens and choices that have lifelong consequences…

[Guest]

14 hours ago, livetoread said:

I don't know if this applies, but I grew up in a conservative Christian environment where sex before marriage was wrong, end of story. I knew plenty of couples who didn't use birth control or at least didn't make a commitment to use something that meant going out of your way to get it etc, because that would mean they were planning on having sex which was a sin and also slutty on the part of the girl. If they felt like sex was wrong, but they just got carried away sometimes without planning for it to happen, that was better then saying, "Yep, going to come up with my plan for sinning now." It was a denial that allowed them some semblance of feeling better, and yes, there were pregnancies.

Yup. My friend who got pg as a teen said exactly this. “I didn’t use bc because then you’re *really* sinning!” I said, “Well…you already ‘really are’…”

That is sad. 

[MercyA]

10 hours ago, Terabith said:

I once talked to a woman who said straight up that she'd rather her teenage daughter (very young, 12 or 13) got pregnant and had a baby than teach her anything about sex. 

Crazy.

My DD had two friends over for a sleepover a few years back. The mom was worried that the girls might talk about s*x and wanted me to listen outside the door to make sure they weren't, because her child (supposedly) didn't know how babies were made. The girls were about 11, maybe, and I know that this particular girl's older sister, at 14, also had not been told anything about sex, even though they had watched their mother give birth. I don't understand what the big secret is. I don't understand why it makes people so uncomfortable. 

The funny part is that the girls in this family were on public school sports teams and had been for years. But she was worried about a sleepover with two girls who had zero interest in talking about s*x (and, honestly, who cares if they did, as long as they had correct info). 

My parents read us a "How Babies Are Made" picture book when we were toddlers. I also loved My Puppy Is Born. Good stuff. 

[MEmama]

13 hours ago, KungFuPanda said:

What just happened?!?!

2023 has entered the chat 🤦‍♀️

[Soror]

On 5/18/2023 at 4:49 AM, Carrie12345 said:

I sidestepped teen pregnancy and got pregnant at 20 instead, lol. Wonderful life, wonderful children, etc. came with lots of extra hardships and much slower than it could have otherwise. Why would anyone want that for their child/grandchild?!?  
As someone who could support a teen through that, it would be terribly irresponsible for me, with a fully formed frontal lobe, to not advise against it.

Yes, having a teen pregnancy does not 100% doom anyone. It doesn't mean all those kids will be unloved or unwanted etc.

But having a teen pregnancy means she is more likely to stay in poverty, more likely to have another kid at a young age, and less likely to further her education. It will make her life even harder and the odds are not in her favor as it is. 

The best option is for her not to have s3x but she is so we have to look at the real-world options.

I can't fathom parents having their heads so far in the sand. Accidents can happen even when you are being careful but when don't educate your children and/or allow bc you are really increasing the odds. Parents should want their kids to have an easier time. They should want their kids to succeed. 

Edited May 19, 2023 by Soror

[73349]

Does she know about the side effects of pregnancy and childbirth??

I would want her to see at least the typical monthly cost of diapers.

Some women are trapped in poverty their whole lives because they had kids sooner than they could afford to. Even one's early 20s are so different from the teens.

[prairiewindmomma]

18 minutes ago, 73349 said:

 

Some women are trapped in poverty their whole lives because they had kids sooner than they could afford to. Even one's early 20s are so different from the teens.

And being in your 30s, with a well established career, sizable savings, and a stable long-standing partnership is even better.

Edited May 18, 2023 by prairiewindmomma

[ArteHaus]

13 hours ago, Katy said:

What evidence do you have that hormonal birth control is very unhealthy?  Let me guess... you heard it in a class about natural family planning.

I'm really tired of religious propaganda being paraded around as reliable scientific or health information. Treating religious edicts designed to control people as gospel is dangerous and has led to a lot of unnecessary death and suffering.

I'm not saying that anything doesn't have side effects, and I myself have posted here several times over the years that sometimes the pill given not for birth control but for treating things like disabling periods or repeated large burst ovarian cysts can also cause hormonal depression. But the idea that something that has both positive (lowers breast and ovarian cancer rates) and negative (can cause blood clots, especially in older women who smoke) side effects is anything that should be decided by anyone except a woman and her doctor.

This is the kind of false information that is leading some politicians to ban birth control.  Better to keep us all at home, barefoot and pregnant, whether that is what we want or not.  I'm really tired of paternalistic lies trying to control my or anyone else's body. Whether it's for controlling women or lying on TicTok so some moron with NO health education can get more clicks and earn more advertising money peddling completely false information.

Well, I am not religious nor do I  belong to any organized religion, nor did I bring morality into the conversation. I would likely find religion more immoral that birth control:)

My point is that hormonal birth control is no good for the body. It is unhealthy.

1. Hormonal birth control acts as an endocrine disruptor. 

2. Hormonal birth control affects the development of bones in women (bone density). This is why is is especially terrible for a young teenager. She hasn’t even finished developing yet.

3. Hormonal birth control is classified as a Class 1 Carcinogen. The sad thing is that the longer a woman takes HBC, her chances of certain cancers increase by 60%. Overall, her chances of developing cancer (breast, colorectal, etc.) increased significantly more than a woman who has never had HBC.

My point is that birth control in this manner is not good at all. I would never allow my child to put this in her body. 

However, there are natural methods of bc that cause NO harm. I am not sure how you could pervert my comment and make it about religious propaganda, lol. I haven’t said anything against the concept of birth control, just that there are healthier ways to approach it. Maybe the mother mentioned in the OP was concerned in the same way.

I have never been to a natural family planning class. So strange that you put that there, I am not sure I understand what that is supposed to mean:) No one has to teach common sense.

Paternalistic? That is so ironic that you say that because it is the woman who is changing the chemistry of her body by using birth control, NOT the man. Natural bc methods are more pro-woman than the synthetic bc that you campaign for, as it does not in any way harm the woman. Don’t you find that ironic?

 

[ArteHaus]

9 hours ago, Clarita said:

I know several women who have had children in their teens. Their lives turned out fine and they were wonderful mothers who raised wonderful children. Also though none of them have ever said "Having a baby at 16 was the best decision of my life!" nor would they ever suggest that for anyone. Every single one of them tell their daughters not to have a baby in their teens.

As do I. I wouldn’t suggest a teen to have a baby with a random teen who won’t support her or marry her. My point, though, is that babies don’t ruin lives. There are worse things that could happen to a person, or a teenager, rather. I just think some people act like it is the worst thing in the world. Of course, there are better moments in life to produce children and in better circumstances. At the end of the day, babies aren’t the life altering nightmares that some people act like they are, even for a teen. 

[MercyA]

@ArteHaus, have you or your spouse posted here under another name in the past?

[Katy]

4 hours ago, ArteHaus said:

Well, I am not religious nor do I  belong to any organized religion, nor did I bring morality into the conversation. I would likely find religion more immoral that birth control:)

My point is that hormonal birth control is no good for the body. It is unhealthy.

1. Hormonal birth control acts as an endocrine disruptor. 

2. Hormonal birth control affects the development of bones in women (bone density). This is why is is especially terrible for a young teenager. She hasn’t even finished developing yet.

3. Hormonal birth control is classified as a Class 1 Carcinogen. The sad thing is that the longer a woman takes HBC, her chances of certain cancers increase by 60%. Overall, her chances of developing cancer (breast, colorectal, etc.) increased significantly more than a woman who has never had HBC.

My point is that birth control in this manner is not good at all. I would never allow my child to put this in her body. 

However, there are natural methods of bc that cause NO harm. I am not sure how you could pervert my comment and make it about religious propaganda, lol. I haven’t said anything against the concept of birth control, just that there are healthier ways to approach it. Maybe the mother mentioned in the OP was concerned in the same way.

I have never been to a natural family planning class. So strange that you put that there, I am not sure I understand what that is supposed to mean:) No one has to teach common sense.

Paternalistic? That is so ironic that you say that because it is the woman who is changing the chemistry of her body by using birth control, NOT the man. Natural bc methods are more pro-woman than the synthetic bc that you campaign for, as it does not in any way harm the woman. Don’t you find that ironic?

 

I’m clearly not going to change your mind, but for anyone finding this thread with Google in the future, everything about this statement is factually untrue. Please don’t get information from people on the internet who pretend to be experts but understand nothing about science. If all else fails, talk to your doctor or one of the OBGYN influencers online. People with actual degrees in medicine or advanced practice nurses.

[Selkie]

26 minutes ago, Katy said:

I’m clearly not going to change your mind, but for anyone finding this thread with Google in the future, everything about this statement is factually untrue. Please don’t get information from people on the internet who pretend to be experts but understand nothing about science. If all else fails, talk to your doctor or one of the OBGYN influencers online. People with actual degrees in medicine or advanced practice nurses.

Don't know about the rest of it, but It is true that birth control pills are classified as a Class 1 carcinogen by the IARC (International Agency for Research on Cancer).

 

[fairfarmhand]

1 hour ago, Selkie said:

Don't know about the rest of it, but It is true that birth control pills are classified as a Class 1 carcinogen by the IARC (International Agency for Research on Cancer).

 

Along with bacon red meat and alcohol.

[Selkie]

2 minutes ago, fairfarmhand said:

Along with bacon red meat and alcohol.

Yes, processed meats (bacon, ham, lunch meat, sausage, hot dogs, pepperoni, corned beef etc.) and alcohol are Class 1 carcinogens, meaning they are carcinogenic to humans. Class 1 includes other carcinogens like tobacco and asbestos (and birth control pills, as mentioned above).

Red meat is classified as a Class 2A carcinogen, meaning it is probably carcinogenic to humans.

[pinball]

2 hours ago, Katy said:

one of the OBGYN influencers online

OMG…this would be funny if it wasn’t so sad

[Melissa Louise]

Yeah, don't get your info from influencers, OBGYN's or not.

Go and see your actual doctor.

Signed, would not agree with ArteHaus with a gun to my head, but yeah, the pill can be problematic for some women.

[Spryte]

I needed more information on this topic (cancer, specifically), and found this: https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/causes-prevention/risk/hormones/oral-contraceptives-fact-sheet which provided some good info, including “…studies have provided consistent evidence that the risks of breast and cervical cancers are increased in women who use oral contraceptives, whereas the risks of endometrial, ovarian, and colorectal cancers are reduced (1–3).” The risks of ovarian cancer seems to go down significantly, 30 - 50% lower risk in women who have ever used hormonal BC, for one (those facts come straight from the linked site).

So it seems that there’s some nuance re: cancer risk, and plenty of reason to speak with one’s personal doctor about these decisions.

However, I’m all for sexually active teens using some effective form of BC, whatever that may be, and I think the benefits outweigh most risks, wrt cancer risk.

Edited May 18, 2023 by Spryte

[Melissa Louise]

7 minutes ago, Spryte said:

I needed more information on this topic, and found this: https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/causes-prevention/risk/hormones/oral-contraceptives-fact-sheet which provided some good info, including “…studies have provided consistent evidence that the risks of breast and cervical cancers are increased in women who use oral contraceptives, whereas the risks of endometrial, ovarian, and colorectal cancers are reduced (1–3).” The risks of ovarian cancer seems to go down significantly, 30 - 50% lower risk in women who have ever used hormonal BC, for one (those facts come straight from the linked site).

So it seems that there’s some nuance, and plenty of reason to speak with one’s personal doctor about these decisions.

However, I’m all for sexually active teens using BC, and I think the benefits outweigh the risks. 

It doesn't outweigh the risks if the pill has a mental health impact, which it does on some girls and women.

There are other forms of BC, of course, and nobody in their right minds thinks that encouraging a teen to be sexually active without protection is ideal.

 

[Spryte]

16 hours ago, Melissa Louise said:

It doesn't outweigh the risks if the pill has a mental health impact, which it does on some girls and women.

There are other forms of BC, of course, and nobody in their right minds thinks that encouraging a teen to be sexually active without protection is ideal.

 

Oh, absolutely. I was thinking specifically of the cancer risk of hormonal BC vs no BC at all as that’s what I understood was being discussed in the moment.

I agree with you on the mental health aspect.

ETA: I edited my post so that it hopefully reflects my thoughts better. 

Edited May 19, 2023 by Spryte

[Sneezyone]

27 minutes ago, Spryte said:

I needed more information on this topic (cancer, specifically), and found this: https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/causes-prevention/risk/hormones/oral-contraceptives-fact-sheet which provided some good info, including “…studies have provided consistent evidence that the risks of breast and cervical cancers are increased in women who use oral contraceptives, whereas the risks of endometrial, ovarian, and colorectal cancers are reduced (1–3).” The risks of ovarian cancer seems to go down significantly, 30 - 50% lower risk in women who have ever used hormonal BC, for one (those facts come straight from the linked site).

So it seems that there’s some nuance re: cancer risk, and plenty of reason to speak with one’s personal doctor about these decisions.

However, I’m all for sexually active teens using some effective form of BC, whatever that may be, and I think the benefits outweigh the risks. 

Which speaks to the experiences of many women, particularly black women, who disproportionately experience inflamatory conditions like endometriosis and other things like Sarcoidosis, Lupus, colorectal cancer, and diabetes...all of which run in our families.

Edited May 18, 2023 by Sneezyone

[SeaConquest]

21 hours ago, Heartstrings said:

Lots of people have unexpected babies and things turn out ok.  Unplanned is not the same as unwanted.  You have 9 whole months to get used to the idea.  You can love, treasure, and do a good job raising children that were unplanned.    
 

Signed, a former teen mom who thinks things ended up pretty ok.  That baby is now 21 and pretty awesome.   

 

ETA: I don’t advise it, of course.  But it’s not all doom and gloom and poor outcomes.  

My cousin had her son when she was 16. I was 14 at the time and remember thinking that my extremely brilliant cousin was throwing her life away. She turned out to be equally amazing a mother as she was student, and her son grew into a beautiful mensch of a man. Her life as a young, single mom was very hard, but through their travails, they have an amazing bond. At 16, I would have had an abortion -- no question -- and my parents would never have been the wiser. And that likely would have been the right choice, looking back on my life. But, as I've grown older, I've come to really admire my cousin's courage. I have no real point with this story re birth control, etc., other than to say that I see you, Heartstrings. ❤️    

[Frances]

8 hours ago, ArteHaus said:

As do I. I wouldn’t suggest a teen to have a baby with a random teen who won’t support her or marry her. My point, though, is that babies don’t ruin lives. There are worse things that could happen to a person, or a teenager, rather. I just think some people act like it is the worst thing in the world. Of course, there are better moments in life to produce children and in better circumstances. At the end of the day, babies aren’t the life altering nightmares that some people act like they are, even for a teen. 

Some babies are born into terrible, life altering, nightmarish scenarios. And that is far likelier to happen when the parents aren’t taking responsibility for their ability to procreate. Let’s think about the poor innocent babies, rather than just focusing on whether or not the teen’s life is ruined. Which is a stupid black and white way to look at it all anyway.