Daycares and allergies?

[Carrie12345]

This is probably just a vent. I’m not sure there’s actually much to be done.

My nephew has a somewhat odd food allergy. He reacts even if he just stops by a home in which the food was there relatively recently. Well, my sister had to pick him up and do an urgent care trip because someone in his daycare had that food. Daycare says it’s that kid’s favorite snack and they can’t make a rule just for one kid. (But they’ll decline a rule for 1 kid’s 1 snack?)

What in the world is a parent supposed to do??!?!  
I almost wish I could share the picture my sister sent of her 4yo’s swollen face and red, puffy eyes. 😞 

[Tap]

I guess it depends on what the food is. If is is a common allergen, like peanuts then I would say it is reasonable to ask for a restriction. Prepackaged foods list it on the allergen label. People are generally aware (but obviously not everyone).

If it is something like citrus allergy, then that would be almost impossible for the daycare to monitor in all premade foods and definably impossible to detect in homemade food. While they could maybe ask parents to not bring the item, it would be very difficult to monitor and enforce. 

I had two kids with food allergies. I understand the issue well....but it isn't realistic to expect the daycare to police lunches for obscure allergens. I had private care for my son who had multiple allergens. My other daughter had common ones, and that was much easier for the daycare to enforce. 

[Junie]

I think food allergies are covered under the ADA.  However, I believe that only "reasonable" accommodations are required.  So, for instance, I have a wheat allergy.  Having an entire business go wheat free would not be considered a reasonable accommodation, and so therefore they would not be required to eliminate it.

ETA:  Sorry that your nephew had such a bad reaction.  I hope that he's feeling better!

Edited October 24, 2022 by Junie

[Carrie12345]

3 minutes ago, Tap said:

I guess it depends on what the food is. If is is a common allergen, like peanuts then I would say it is reasonable to ask for a restriction. Prepackaged foods list it on the allergen label. People are generally aware (but obviously not everyone).

If it is something like citrus allergy, then that would be almost impossible for the daycare to monitor in all premade foods and definably impossible to detect in homemade food. While they could maybe ask parents to not bring the item, it would be very difficult to monitor and enforce. 

I had two kids with food allergies. I understand the issue well....but it isn't realistic to expect the daycare to police lunches for obscure allergens. I had private care for my son who had multiple allergens. My other daughter had common ones, and that was much easier for the daycare to enforce. 

I don’t want to influence anyone’s judgment yet.

It’s not a super common allergy, and it *can be found in weirdly random foods, but there’s one primary culprit that it’s always (or nearly always) in, and seems to have the greatest/worst airborne influence. This snack isn’t a traditional snack in the way of granola bars or fruit snacks, but it has been gaining some normalcy over the past few years.

So, basically, there’s no super need to check labels on what other kids are eating, so long as he doesn’t eat it, but this one obvious food being in the vicinity requires medical attention. 

[Tap]

12 minutes ago, Carrie12345 said:

I don’t want to influence anyone’s judgment yet.

It’s not a super common allergy, and it *can be found in weirdly random foods, but there’s one primary culprit that it’s always (or nearly always) in, and seems to have the greatest/worst airborne influence. This snack isn’t a traditional snack in the way of granola bars or fruit snacks, but it has been gaining some normalcy over the past few years.

So, basically, there’s no super need to check labels on what other kids are eating, so long as he doesn’t eat it, but this one obvious food being in the vicinity requires medical attention. 

I would ask the daycare to have a conversation with the one child it affects. Maybe the family will be able to accommodate this request easily. Otherwise, maybe the allergic child can be asked to eat in a room away from the other kids if that item is being eaten on that day. I don't know if that would help in this case to. If nothing else, it would minimize his exposure. 

[Clarita]

12 minutes ago, Carrie12345 said:

It’s not a super common allergy, and it *can be found in weirdly random foods, but there’s one primary culprit that it’s always (or nearly always) in, and seems to have the greatest/worst airborne influence. This snack isn’t a traditional snack in the way of granola bars or fruit snacks, but it has been gaining some normalcy over the past few years.

The thing is it may not be a big deal for someone to make sure this allergen isn't around, but if the daycare says they will make sure this allergen isn't around it does become a big deal (liability) for them. The only maybe reasonable request they may be able to accommodate is to separate the child with allergy during snack time?

So like nut allergy is common so some daycares will guarantee that it's not there and then they send notes home all nine yards no one is allowed to bring nuts into the establishment type stuff. 

[Junie]

So now I'm imagining that it's something kind of obscure, like kale chips or something.  I don't know what the answer is.  If I were the daycare provider, I would explain the situation to the other child's parents and see if they are willing to accommodate by not bringing the food.  If they are not, then I would move the child with an allergy to another class.  Those seem like reasonable accommodations to me.

[City Mouse]

An airborn food allergy is going to be very, very hard to manage in a daycare center. it is one thing to have a “peanut free table” or something like that, but I don’t see how they can guarantee that any allergy won’t ever cross through the door. I don’t think it is reasonable to expect that every family of every child in every classroom not ever bring the offending item. What if some forgets? I know of more than one family who chose to homeschool their kids due to sever food allergies.

[HomeAgain]

I am a little disturbed that the daycare is not alerting the parents that there is this allergy in their child's classroom.  I would be mortified if I knew I was putting another kid at risk unknowingly and would be furious with the institution that kept me from knowing while making the other child suffer.

The apathy and lack of common sense here is astounding.  Putting it terms they understand, that it is a liability due to the fact that the staff knows and turns a blind eye, may help create an action plan to minimize exposure.

ETA: this is a documentation issue.  Your sister needs to write up a document that details the incident, the daycare's plan going forward (nothing), and a statement that spells out the exact issue. She needs to bring a copy of it with her to the daycare and sign/date it, and have it put in her kid's file while taking a picture of it on the director's desk in order to time stamp it.  She needs to be very sweet about it, with a "this needs to be written down so we have your response on file."

She needs to lay it out bare, so there is no question of the liability moving forward and getting the daycare to cover medical bills for the next time.

Edited October 24, 2022 by HomeAgain

[Carrie12345]

I appreciate all the input, and I’m going to pass on all the suggestions!

Here it is - hummus. 
The kid has never not blown up from a whiff of hummus. (The allergy is specifically sesame.)

Believe me, if my sister could stay home with her kids, she would. It’s not an option. 

[HomeAgain]

3 minutes ago, Carrie12345 said:

I appreciate all the input, and I’m going to pass on all the suggestions!

Here it is - hummus. 
The kid has never not blown up from a whiff of hummus. (The allergy is specifically sesame.)

Believe me, if my sister could stay home with her kids, she would. It’s not an option. 

I am astounded.  They do make hummus without tahini!  It can be made at home without it, too! 

I am so angry for your sister.

[Terabith]

I can see how this would be an issue for things that have trace amounts of sesame.  It’s not super well labeled on everything. But certainly parents could be asked not to send things they know have sesame in them, like hummus!!!  As a parent, I would want to do my best not to send something a child is allergic to. 

[lmrich]

Sesame will be hard for him. Does he react to sesame seeds on baked goods? 

And why wouldn't the  daycare just ask for folks to be accommodating? I get  it is  hard to  police it, but you can ask. 

Hope you nephew is feeling better.

[lmrich]

2 minutes ago, Terabith said:

I can see how this would be an issue for things that have trace amounts of sesame.  It’s not super well labeled on everything. But certainly parents could be asked not to send things they know have sesame in them, like hummus!!!  As a parent, I would want to do my best not to send something a child is allergic to. 

I wonder how many people know that sesame   is even in hummus? 

[vonfirmath]

1 hour ago, lmrich said:

I wonder how many people know that sesame   is even in hummus? 

This is the problem we ended up with a dairy allergy. People would avoid giving her milk and sometimes cheese. But not even think about the many things that have milk as part of it. Such as yogurt. (Even Goldfish! Thankfully hers was a sensitivity not anaphylactic!)

 

[Miss Tick]

I don't think the knee jerk reaction should be to separate the kid with the allergy at snack time, but rather the one kid whose day is not complete without that particular snack. That way the child's hands and face can be washed before s/he re-enters the general population area. I mean it sounds like hummus is the problem food at this time in nephew's life.

Edited October 24, 2022 by Miss Tick
misused an apostrophe

[Spryte]

Sesame. Oh dear. 

I’m going to be frank — if kid is not anaphylactic now, it’s quite likely anaphylactic reactions are in the future if exposure isn’t limited now. This can get serious, and fast. Does child have an epipen? Future reactions cannot be predicted based on past reactions, and are likely going to get worse. I know a lot of sesame allergic kids, and all started more mild but eventually became anaphylactic.

Sesame is not really an obscure allergy. It’s considered Top 9. In fact, starting very soon it will be included in mandatory ingredient labeling — we are one of the families that lobbied hard and put a lot of sweat into getting that changed. My sesame allergic kid learned a lot about lobbying, as a matter of fact. Sesame is a serious PITA allergy, as we have to contact every single company about “natural flavorings” etc, and getting this on labels clearly is a huge deal. 

I hope there is a board certified allergist on board who can explain that the best chance a kid has of outgrowing an allergy is to avoid the allergen completely, even in tiny amounts, so that the body “forgets” to mount an immune response in the future when it encounters it again. Total avoidance now can save a lifetime of vigilance and potential danger. It’s worth it.

That being the goal, allergist can write a letter to the daycare. Sesame allergy can be life threatening. This is covered by the ADA. Kids are entitled to safe spaces, and one kid’s preferred snack does NOT trump another kid’s right to — frankly — breathe.

I’m astounded that a daycare is acting this way. I would be horrified, and looking for a daycare that would better care for my kid’s safety — now and in future (because of the on-going exposure issue).

I hope they can work something out, and that there is a good resolution to this soon. Or that nephew is soon in a daycare that is keeping him safe. 

Edited October 24, 2022 by Spryte

[Spryte]

Oh, also want to encourage nephew’s parents to join FARE. https://www.foodallergy.org/

 

Info on sesame allergy: 

https://www.foodallergy.org/living-food-allergies/food-allergy-essentials/common-allergens/sesame

Edited October 24, 2022 by Spryte

[Boymama5]

I guess what I don’t understand is that the child had a major reaction to the food item yet the daycare won’t do anything about it?  I can understand in the case of my children where it’s only a reaction due to ingestion, but clearly there is a problem. If I were the other parent I’d gladly not send the item with my child if I knew it was an issue.  If hummus is the main issue I don’t see asking the child to stop bringing it seeing there has been a documented problem with it. 

[Starr]

It's hard with the extra sensitive allergies. Ideally he needs to be in a place that will accommodate his medical needs. Do they have an epipen and know when to use it? Other meds the doctor wants given? There isn't always time for mom to get there. I'm so sorry they are going through this. Hopefully the other family won't mind making a change.

 

[almondbutterandjelly]

Find a different daycare. There are daycares that do take food allergies seriously.

[kbutton]

 

15 hours ago, Junie said:

So now I'm imagining that it's something kind of obscure, like kale chips or something.  I don't know what the answer is.  If I were the daycare provider, I would explain the situation to the other child's parents and see if they are willing to accommodate by not bringing the food.  If they are not, then I would move the child with an allergy to another class.  Those seem like reasonable accommodations to me.

I agree.

And I don't think sesame allergy is rare. I am glad to hear that labelling is going to be catching up to that fact soon.

3 hours ago, Miss Tick said:

I don't think the knee jerk reaction should be to separate the kid with the allergy at snack time, but rather the one kid who's day is not complete without that particular snack. That way the child's hands and face can be washed before s/he re-enters the general population area. I mean it sounds like hummus is the problem food at this time in nephew's life.

I agree. Maybe also having that kid brush teeth, etc.

I have a kid that finds it difficult to gain weight; he's not picky, but a lot of the high calorie foods that work for him are allergenic, and he has oral motor issues that make it difficult for him to eat foods that are hard to chew in the allotted time for lunch. If I couldn't find a substitute food that worked, then I would seek out accommodations for my kid to be able to eat someplace and in some way that would not make the other kid sick. 

I would want to know what was up in a way that the issue could be solved sensibly and safely, not in a kneejerk way. 

[Terabith]

I mean, has the day care even told other parents that there’s a kid with a sesame allergy?  It sounds like they’re assuming the parents/ kids will fight for the kid’s right to hummus, but we don’t know if that’s even true.  I sent my kids with the same food pretty much every day, because I simplify my life by having set menus for breakfast and lunch, but I would of course change it if I knew there was an allergy.  

[Spryte]

27 minutes ago, Terabith said:

I mean, has the day care even told other parents that there’s a kid with a sesame allergy?  It sounds like they’re assuming the parents/ kids will fight for the kid’s right to hummus, but we don’t know if that’s even true.  I sent my kids with the same food pretty much every day, because I simplify my life by having set menus for breakfast and lunch, but I would of course change it if I knew there was an allergy.  

Yes, I think most people would happily send a different snack with their kid if they knew another child was very allergic.

There are plenty of ways the daycare can make this work so that no kid gets sick. It’s a bit trickier since OP’s nephew seems to be reacting to airborne particles. (Just going off OP, I don’t really know — that part does make it harder, though.) What’s shocking is that the daycare doesn’t seem to want to do anything at all. That’s … odd.

Getting an action plan from the child’s allergist, and an epipen, would probably go a long way toward getting the daycare on board. If those things are not in place already.

FWIW, we make sesame-free hummus all the time at home. But it’s not as convenient as buying it, so I get that it’s a hassle. Allergies are a pain.

[happi duck]

If she's truly stuck with this daycare provider I hope she can get an EpiPen and very clear instructions to leave with the daycare along with a sample letter to send to other families.  Maybe fear of administering the EpiPen would get them to actually send the letter and try to actually care for the kids they're paid to care for.

[purpleowl]

I'm trying to think of why they might feel unable to ask the other family to change the snack, and the only thing I can come up with is that perhaps that child has his own food issues. But it seems like even if the other child has ARFID, or if the other child also has food allergies that limit his options, they could still have him do the snack in another room like others have said, washing hands/face and brushing teeth when he's done. 

Wait a minute, though - has this happened multiple times? If this kid always brings this snack...? If the kid does NOT always bring it, then clearly he can bring something else! If the kid has brought it before without your nephew reacting, then they must have been able to keep him away from the allergen in the past. 

I would probably be looking for a new daycare if this one is acting all "nothing we can do!" in this situation. I would not feel like I could trust them to keep my child safe. 🙁

[DeainUSA]

That's so scary!  I would be concerned that they are so unconcerned!

[almondbutterandjelly]

Not to beat a dead horse, but she really needs to find a different daycare.  My dd has multiple food allergies, a couple anaphylactic.  There are people who don't get it, who won't get it, and who can't get it.  This daycare sounds like that place.

There are also places that are wonderful and do get it.  Not that there will never be a mistake there, but at least you can feel better about it.  They are conscientious about hand washing and what food is allowed in the classroom and epipen training and all that.  She needs to find a daycare like that.  

[City Mouse]

My concern would be that even if the daycare does request that other children don’t bring hummus, what happens when a child brings a granola bar with sesame seeds in it, or a muffin, left over Chinese food? How can they keep the facility safe to such a severe airborne allergy without inspecting every bit of food that is brought into the building? From a parent perspective, even if the day care did all the thing everyone has mentioned, would that be safe enough for my child?

On the other hand, my kids attended a child care center that provided all of the food each day. In a facility like that, it would be much easier for the facility to know that it was safe for the child with airborne allergy.