Ann.without.an.e Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 (edited) He was hit with sudden extreme back pain. To the point where he left work and then decided it wasn’t safe to drive home. I had to meet him at a gas station and ask a random fed ex driver to help move him from his car to mine so that I could get him to the ER because he couldn’t support his own weight. This is a kiddo who has a super high pain tolerance and I’ve seen him in some painful situations but never like this (he had less pain with a ruptured appendix). It took 11 hours to be seen. They were worried about a spinal cord injury since he had such extreme pain and also tingling in both legs. Turns out he broke a bone in his spine. I haven’t slept in over 24 hours so please excuse my hodge podge of random thoughts and questions… He’s in his career field already. He recently put in a two week notice at his job and has just over a week left before his new job starts. He was really excited about his new job. How will this work? Can they just change their mind and say “nevermind we’ve decided not to hire you”? Since it sounds like he won’t be able to work for 2 months? The ER system is so broken and I would never want to be an ER nurse or doctor. Bless their hearts. But being stuck here is awful too. I know you know what I mean and I don’t need to give details. Getting a 21 year old guy to lay low will probably be harder than getting a toddler to sit still 😭 ETA: I mean right now he’s flat on his back but I know before he is healed he will push it and say “it’ll be fine”. That’s what this sex, age, species does 🤦🏻♀️ From what I understand they are planning a back brace and pain meds. They are mostly worried about pain since it is a super painful injury. How does he stay on these without becoming dependent? That always worries me. This kid has been through so much. It kills my mama heart to see him face another obstacle. He got terribly sick when he was 10 and was eventually diagnosed with very aggressive Crohn’s disease. It’s been a hard road. Less than two years ago his appendix ruptured and we were in the hospital for over 2 weeks because his intestines shut down and wouldn’t start working again. We truly weren’t sure he would make it through that one. A few months ago he had to go through a liver biopsy and was diagnosed with a rare autoimmune liver disease that gives him 10 years average life expectancy from diagnosis unless he gets a transplant. On top of a lot of other things, my mama heart is just tired y’all. Like Exhausted. I think this is all of my random, tired thoughts thank you ❤️ Edited July 7, 2022 by Ann.without.an.e 60 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klmama Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 (((Ann))) Praying for your ds and for you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I talk to the trees Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 (edited) I have no real words to help, but know that I (and I am certain, many others here) am sending gentle hugs from one mama heart to another! Edited July 7, 2022 by I talk to the trees *sigh* Autocorrect strikes again! 4 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Tiggywinkle Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 (edited) What did he break? I broke 2 of the transverse processes in my back in 2014 and was able to work a physically demanding job in a few weeks. It hurt but I couldn’t afford to be off work. I’d make sure he gets seen by an orthopedist or neurologist(I saw neuro) for follow up. Also I’d be very concerned if there is a break with no trauma, unless it’s something like a compression fracture. It depends on your state, but I suspect a job offer can be withdrawn if the start date changes significantly. Edited July 7, 2022 by Mrs Tiggywinkle 4 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScoutTN Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 Oh no! Praying for your Ds and you! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ann.without.an.e Posted July 7, 2022 Author Share Posted July 7, 2022 (edited) 4 minutes ago, Mrs Tiggywinkle said: What did he break? I broke 2 of the transverse processes in my back in 2014 and was able to work a physically demanding job in a few weeks. It hurt but I couldn’t afford to be off work. I’d make sure he gets seen by an orthopedist or neurologist(I saw neuro) for follow up. Also I’d be very concerned if there is a break with no trauma, unless it’s something like a compression fracture. It depends on your state, but I suspect a job offer can be withdrawn if the start date changes significantly. There was an injury, it just wasn’t followed by pain at the time so he thought he was ok. He has an elevated bed and Sunday morning he was half asleep and put his foot on the ottoman to get down and didn’t realize his foot was on the edge. The ottoman flipped and he fell but his lower back landed right across the bottom wooden piece of the ottoman. He didn’t even think to tell me until on the way to the ER. Edited July 7, 2022 by Ann.without.an.e 12 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katy Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I’m so sorry. Dependence is probably going to happen; dependence happens to everyone on those drugs for a long period of time. It only means he’ll develop an increased tolerance. Addiction is what you need to be concerned about; that is a psychological dependence rather than a physical one. Whether that happens is partially genetic and appears to partially be social. In other words, keep him engaged, both in person and online if need be. In the US there is no job protection for a job he hasn’t started yet. If they like him they may save it anyway or invite him to re-apply when he is able to work. Spinal injuries are tricky and you really need a surgeon to evaluate to guess potential to heal. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheReader Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I have no idea on the job situation, but big hugs & prayers to you/your DS. I'm so sorry he's going through all of this. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 That is terrible. I am so so sad. I am hopeful they will save his job. What kind of job is the new job? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmrich Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 So sorry and will be praying for you both. For the job worries - encourage him to be honest and transparent with the new employer. There will most likely be lots of training and learning company policies the first week or two - which can be done remotely. And with the job market now, he should be fine. Don't borrow trouble and worry about that. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I'm so sorry. Try and slow down a bit and worry about jobs later. I would look into his health insurance and be sure he's covered between jobs. I do pray he heals well and quickly. It's so hard when things don't go right for our kids. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I'm sorry. I hope he is able to get his pain under control soon so he can get off the strong stuff ASAP. Big hugs. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kassia Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I'm so sorry about all of it. The pain, the worry, the stress...what an awful situation. I hope he gets some relief soon and can wean off the meds safely. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wintermom Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 So sorry for you ds. Hugs and prayers for you all. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stephanier.1765 Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I am so sorry! I would be worried about everything you listed as well. Does he live with you? If not, can he afford to live on his own while between jobs. I'm hoping he already does live with you guys because that would make everything easier all around for care and expense. My mama heart hurts for him too. It's so hard to see your child in pain regardless of their age. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KSera Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I’m so sorry, that sounds terrible. For the pain, has he talked to the doctor about prescribing something different to take after the initial 2-3 days? I believe some studies have shown NSAIDS to provide as much pain relief without the addiction risk of opioids. There’s also Tramadol, which is an opioid but has a lower addiction risk profile. Or Toradol for short term use, which is a heavy duty NSAID (I had it once in the hospital when I declined morphine, and the toradol was amazingly effective for me). We watched an extended family member become addicted after a workers comp back injury, and have been exceedingly careful about them ever since. I hope they can find a good way to keep him comfortable while he heals that hopefully doesn’t rely on opioids for very long. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cintinative Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I am so very sorry. Prayers for you all. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kanin Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 Oh my gosh. That is awful. I can't imagine being in the ER for 18 hours! I hope you both can rest now that you know what the problem is. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 53 minutes ago, stephanier.1765 said: I am so sorry! I would be worried about everything you listed as well. Does he live with you? If not, can he afford to live on his own while between jobs. I'm hoping he already does live with you guys because that would make everything easier all around for care and expense. My mama heart hurts for him too. It's so hard to see your child in pain regardless of their age. Pretty sure this son still lives with @Ann.without.an.e. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scholastica Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I don't know the answer to the employment question, but I will be praying for both you and your son, Ann. I'm so sorry. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommyoffive Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I am so sorry. Your poor son. He has been through so much. Sending lots of gentle good thoughts his way. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildflowerMom Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I am so sorry. I have no btdt advice, just prayers and virtual hugs. 💛💛💛 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kbutton Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 1 hour ago, KSera said: I’m so sorry, that sounds terrible. For the pain, has he talked to the doctor about prescribing something different to take after the initial 2-3 days? I believe some studies have shown NSAIDS to provide as much pain relief without the addiction risk of opioids. I just had a child go through major back surgery (spine fused from the top of his thoracic spine to the last vertebra above his tailbone), and while it's a bit different, this is what we learned about pain and orthopedic stuff. IF he is allowed to be on NSAIDS (some orthopedic doctors do not want that for some types of healing!), then he can use an NSAID along with tylenol. I believe it's the NSAID plus tylenol that is considered as effective as opioids, not just one or the other. Usually the heavy duty stuff is just for a few days, and if it's for more like 10 days to 2 weeks, you should create a weaning schedule (sometimes half doses or stretching between doses). If he can use an NSAID, honestly, he will probably be fine within a few days unless the time between injury and the ER really messed up his muscles and such. But even then, the muscle pain will probably not be something the opioids will fix. They might Rx a muscle relaxer along with it that can help with muscle spasms/pain. Not all types of pain are responsive to the same meds, so be sure he can identify different types of pain--muscle spasms hurt like heck but will be better served by a muscle relaxer and ice or heat (also some kinds of mild stretching, if allowed--my son had really mild exercises to do post-surgery and once we were told he could do them as often as wanted, not just what is written on the sheet, they were incredibly effective). If he's relatively immobile, that can lead to slower bowel function, which can give him gas pain that radiates to his chest and back. Opioids cause constipation, which can do the same or be painful just from constipation. It's a lot of types of potential pain at once, and not knowing that the opioids only help with one type of pain makes it harder to get control of the pain. I'd get him on colace and miralax and keep some gas ex handy. They might be willing to prescribe something like Celebrex if they are not wanting him to use regular NSAIDs. It is an NSAID, but it's a different pathway than ibuprofen, etc. He really needs to be seen by a top-notch orthopedist or a neurologist ASAP to be sure things are okay. They will also get him set up with PT and such, if needed. I know a kid who had a serious spinal injury, including a crushed vertebra, and he recovered really well, but he had surgery. Your son is sort of bypassing that (so far), and I think it's really important that you get a consult with a surgeon who can get him set up with the right kind of recovery. Even if he doesn't require surgery, the surgeon would likely get him PT or at least recovery exercises to do at home, etc. 8 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kbutton Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 Also, IDK if your son's autoimmune stuff increases his risk of blood clots, but keep that in mind with chest pain, shortness of breath, etc. https://health.clevelandclinic.org/blood-clot-warning-signs/ My son had PEs after his surgery, and his pain symptoms presented as feeling like he was so hungry it hurt (he had other classic signs--it was pretty textbook). You don't need to have a DVT to get a PE, and PEs can develop after the DVT--like the next day, etc. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soror Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I'm sorry. That is horrible. I hope you all get home soon and Ds gets relief. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I'm so sorry to hear this, Ann! I don't know anything about the job-related stuff, but I will pray that everything works out for your son, and that he recovers quickly and can still keep his new job! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 I can’t take opioids. At all. I have been through three surgeries (one last week) using only Tylenol and ibuprofen combined for recovery pain. I know back pain is it’s own animal. Dh has a double fusion in lower back and a double fusion in his neck. He has also had massive reconstructive surgery on his knee after an accident, many small surgeries on that knee and finally a total knee replacement. He has needed strong drugs for sure. He is on blood thinners now and can’t take NSAIDs. He hates opioids. He usually only takes them for the first week and then starts weaning off. They make him nauseous and angry. So be on the lookout for that. If your son isn’t going to need surgery that is good. It means it is probably ‘only’ a crack and it will heal. Probably quickly since he is young. Hopefully he does not smoke as that impedes healing. I feel really bad for him with the new job situation…..but this will pass. If I were him I would explain he had an accident and will need a bit to heal….no need to tell them several weeks passed between accident and ER visit! Lol 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matryoshka Posted July 7, 2022 Share Posted July 7, 2022 About pain relief... 2 of my kids have had spinal surgery (cut into spine, messed about with spinal cord, 6" scar) - they both swore by, of all things, IcyHot patches, the kind you stick to your back. And not even the ones with lidocaine, just the regular menthol ones. The big ones. That gave them more relief than anything. I think they did get opiods as well, but they didn't take them for long, and they used the patches for extra relief and after. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ausmumof3 Posted July 8, 2022 Share Posted July 8, 2022 I’m so sorry. I hope he makes a full recovery and is able to keep his job. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forget-Me-Not Posted July 8, 2022 Share Posted July 8, 2022 I’d probably let the new job know ASAP and make it clear that he very much wants the job and is excited. The more notice you give, the better chance they have to make arrangements to cover it and hold it if they are willing. Is this a field where he could do something sitting or light duty for part of his recovery? Re pain: opioids have their place. I recently injured my low back and nothing touched it but opioids (and I was the one asking for Toradol instead of narcotics after my surgeries). Hopefully he can use them to get over the worst part of the pain and graduate to NSAIDS within a few days or a week. I was prescribed diclofenac (one of a few Rx NSAIDs) which helped more than ibuprofen or naproxen and got me through the gap between narcotics and OTC NSAIDS. Hope he recovers fast! 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ann.without.an.e Posted July 8, 2022 Author Share Posted July 8, 2022 On 7/7/2022 at 9:29 AM, Scarlett said: That is terrible. I am so so sad. I am hopeful they will save his job. What kind of job is the new job? He is a mechanic and both jobs are mechanic jobs. On 7/7/2022 at 9:48 AM, Starr said: I'm so sorry. Try and slow down a bit and worry about jobs later. I would look into his health insurance and be sure he's covered between jobs. I do pray he heals well and quickly. It's so hard when things don't go right for our kids. He is still on our insurance, thankfully. 23 hours ago, stephanier.1765 said: I am so sorry! I would be worried about everything you listed as well. Does he live with you? If not, can he afford to live on his own while between jobs. I'm hoping he already does live with you guys because that would make everything easier all around for care and expense. My mama heart hurts for him too. It's so hard to see your child in pain regardless of their age. He lives with us, yes. So thankful he has not moved out yet. 22 hours ago, kbutton said: I just had a child go through major back surgery (spine fused from the top of his thoracic spine to the last vertebra above his tailbone), and while it's a bit different, this is what we learned about pain and orthopedic stuff. IF he is allowed to be on NSAIDS (some orthopedic doctors do not want that for some types of healing!), then he can use an NSAID along with tylenol. I believe it's the NSAID plus tylenol that is considered as effective as opioids, not just one or the other. Usually the heavy duty stuff is just for a few days, and if it's for more like 10 days to 2 weeks, you should create a weaning schedule (sometimes half doses or stretching between doses). If he can use an NSAID, honestly, he will probably be fine within a few days unless the time between injury and the ER really messed up his muscles and such. But even then, the muscle pain will probably not be something the opioids will fix. They might Rx a muscle relaxer along with it that can help with muscle spasms/pain. Not all types of pain are responsive to the same meds, so be sure he can identify different types of pain--muscle spasms hurt like heck but will be better served by a muscle relaxer and ice or heat (also some kinds of mild stretching, if allowed--my son had really mild exercises to do post-surgery and once we were told he could do them as often as wanted, not just what is written on the sheet, they were incredibly effective). If he's relatively immobile, that can lead to slower bowel function, which can give him gas pain that radiates to his chest and back. Opioids cause constipation, which can do the same or be painful just from constipation. It's a lot of types of potential pain at once, and not knowing that the opioids only help with one type of pain makes it harder to get control of the pain. I'd get him on colace and miralax and keep some gas ex handy. They might be willing to prescribe something like Celebrex if they are not wanting him to use regular NSAIDs. It is an NSAID, but it's a different pathway than ibuprofen, etc. He really needs to be seen by a top-notch orthopedist or a neurologist ASAP to be sure things are okay. They will also get him set up with PT and such, if needed. I know a kid who had a serious spinal injury, including a crushed vertebra, and he recovered really well, but he had surgery. Your son is sort of bypassing that (so far), and I think it's really important that you get a consult with a surgeon who can get him set up with the right kind of recovery. Even if he doesn't require surgery, the surgeon would likely get him PT or at least recovery exercises to do at home, etc. Wow, I am sorry y'all had to go through that. Yes, it is the muscle spasms that are causing so much pain. When we were discharged they asked him and he said he would rather have something for the spasms rather than Percocet or oxycodone. They prescribed Valium and the labels on that are pretty scary. ugh. He has follow ups with neurology. Should he also see orthopedic before he is cleared by neurology? 20 hours ago, Scarlett said: I can’t take opioids. At all. I have been through three surgeries (one last week) using only Tylenol and ibuprofen combined for recovery pain. I know back pain is it’s own animal. Dh has a double fusion in lower back and a double fusion in his neck. He has also had massive reconstructive surgery on his knee after an accident, many small surgeries on that knee and finally a total knee replacement. He has needed strong drugs for sure. He is on blood thinners now and can’t take NSAIDs. He hates opioids. He usually only takes them for the first week and then starts weaning off. They make him nauseous and angry. So be on the lookout for that. If your son isn’t going to need surgery that is good. It means it is probably ‘only’ a crack and it will heal. Probably quickly since he is young. Hopefully he does not smoke as that impedes healing. I feel really bad for him with the new job situation…..but this will pass. If I were him I would explain he had an accident and will need a bit to heal….no need to tell them several weeks passed between accident and ER visit! Lol He is currently just taking the combo of 600 mg ibuprofen and and 2 Tylenol. Yes, hopefully he heals quickly. I can't take opioids either. Makes me feel super weird, not in a good way. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kbutton Posted July 8, 2022 Share Posted July 8, 2022 1 minute ago, Ann.without.an.e said: Wow, I am sorry y'all had to go through that. Yes, it is the muscle spasms that are causing so much pain. When we were discharged they asked him and he said he would rather have something for the spasms rather than Percocet or oxycodone. They prescribed Valium and the labels on that are pretty scary. ugh. He has follow ups with neurology. Should he also see orthopedic before he is cleared by neurology? His surgery actually had excellent outcomes for his spine, but it would've been nice to cut out all the GI trouble! A lot of people with the same surgery have a lot more surgical pain and spasming than he did. Valium should help him in the short term, but it is kind of scary like opioids. He could wean off of that to robaxin--it's a muscle relaxer that is not as scary. Magnesium is also really good for muscle spasms, but I would want some robaxin as well. I think seeing neurology is fine. Both specialties look at spine stuff. I would ask at follow-up what kinds of exercises are safe and might help with spasming. That's the number one thing that took care of my son's spasming. He did things like small shoulder circles and shoulder shrugs. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kassia Posted July 8, 2022 Share Posted July 8, 2022 Thanks for the update @Ann.without.an.e I've been thinking about your ds and you too. Glad he's home and on your insurance at least. Hope he gets some relief from the spasms. Must be so awful for him to experience that kind of pain and for you to witness it. 😞 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matryoshka Posted July 8, 2022 Share Posted July 8, 2022 41 minutes ago, kbutton said: His surgery actually had excellent outcomes for his spine, but it would've been nice to cut out all the GI trouble! A lot of people with the same surgery have a lot more surgical pain and spasming than he did. Valium should help him in the short term, but it is kind of scary like opioids. He could wean off of that to robaxin--it's a muscle relaxer that is not as scary. Magnesium is also really good for muscle spasms, but I would want some robaxin as well. I think seeing neurology is fine. Both specialties look at spine stuff. I would ask at follow-up what kinds of exercises are safe and might help with spasming. That's the number one thing that took care of my son's spasming. He did things like small shoulder circles and shoulder shrugs. I think one if mine had spasms too... I think I have vague memories of them having had muscle relaxants in the mix for a bit? I can ask. Have you tried adding the Icy Hot patches? Can't hurt to try... 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kbutton Posted July 8, 2022 Share Posted July 8, 2022 1 hour ago, Matryoshka said: I think one if mine had spasms too... I think I have vague memories of them having had muscle relaxants in the mix for a bit? I can ask. Have you tried adding the Icy Hot patches? Can't hurt to try... If you are asking me and not the OP, my kiddo is doing well. He gets a little tired and stiff, but he rarely has spasms or pain now. He was off of the muscle relaxers by about a week and half post-surgery. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ann.without.an.e Posted July 8, 2022 Author Share Posted July 8, 2022 Magnesium is a good idea @kbutton and I picked up the icy hot patches today at the pharmacy. @Matryoshka he has the lidocaine patch on right now so he can try the Icy hot patch when it’s time to change. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted July 8, 2022 Share Posted July 8, 2022 1 hour ago, Ann.without.an.e said: Magnesium is a good idea @kbutton and I picked up the icy hot patches today at the pharmacy. @Matryoshka he has the lidocaine patch on right now so he can try the Icy hot patch when it’s time to change. I find that magnesium is downright amazing with relaxing muscle tension. I hope it helps. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom_to3 Posted July 8, 2022 Share Posted July 8, 2022 Oh, no advice, but this all sounds so horrible!! Poor kid (I know he's 21, but he's still your baby...). Good that there is no spinal cord injury. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ann.without.an.e Posted July 8, 2022 Author Share Posted July 8, 2022 I think his job may be ok? The manager there just replied that it’s ok and not to worry and he’ll inform whoever needs to be informed. I hope that means they’ll hold the position for him but he didn’t say it directly. 20 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 9, 2022 Share Posted July 9, 2022 16 hours ago, Ann.without.an.e said: I think his job may be ok? The manager there just replied that it’s ok and not to worry and he’ll inform whoever needs to be informed. I hope that means they’ll hold the position for him but he didn’t say it directly. My guess is they will hold it for him. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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