Why does "Simple" seem so...Difficult?

[mathmarm]

Hubby and I've been unsatisfied with 3rd grade. The main issue is that it feels "too lite" because it feels like writing is the only skill that is actually being learned this year.  He's using his reading, math and drawing skills, but we feel that he's kind of coasting in those area, instead of being really challenged and actively improving.

We'd like to push him a little more and stretch him, but with everything going on this year, what we have for 3rd grade while not great, it is very sustainable. We plan 1 semester at a time, and were going to change up a few things. However, Hubby and I sat down, looked back and discussed what Jr. is learning in 3rd grade and what skills he's getting from it, we realized that this 3rd grade plan is good, but it's certainly not great.

Because we have a lot of things going on, we're tentatively deciding to not make changes to the 2nd semester because 3rd grade is at least going good. We do feel that he's growing as a writer and writing is an important component of the literacy skill set that we want for our home schooled students.

Hubby and I feel good about leaving things as they are--but we don't feel great about leaving things as they are.

Why does it feel so hard to let things be simple?

 

 

 

 

 

[Dianthus]

What are you doing? 

I guess it depends on your situation. Is your son happy, engaged, bored? Are you teaching other children? Can you afford time to do more? 

[Clemsondana]

I don't understand what 'great' would look like for you.  It seems like everything is going well and learning is happening.  If you just want to add some stretch or challenge but don't want to disrupt everything that is going well, I would just add some challenge work occasionally (challenging word problems from Singapore, any of the assortment of puzzle books from the Critical Thinking Company) or add some self-exploration time with something like snap circuits and Kinex sets or add Friday afternoon science/engineering videos (I just finished the 6 episodes of 'When Big Things Go Wrong' with one of my kids, and during the 2019 shutdown we watched Extinct or Alive) and then talk about what you learned or let kid draw pictures of it in a notebook.  

I'd try to figure out what goal is making you feel uneasy.  Do you feel like your kid isn't learning to deal with challenge?  Kids need to learn that at some point, but not every subject every year.  If the goal is 'know this content by the end of 3rd grade' and you are on track to do that, then all is well.  I've got kids who can do advanced work and I've had to realize that sometimes good enough is indeed good enough.  

[HomeAgain]

It's December break.

This is the time of year when we start getting bored, begin to feel dissatisfied with anything that starts to feel monotonous or predictable.  By February, it becomes unbearable.

I don't have an answer for you.  In our house, I plan a unit study and a vacation around February, something to get us feeling excited again.  By the end of March the spring starts to peek through and encourage us to be more outside, and by the middle of April we feel like we can power through to the end again.

This year's unit is Da Vinci. A little longer than we would take in a usual history study, but tying in art, math, and science for a larger piece.

[Dianthus]

2 hours ago, HomeAgain said:

It's December break.

This is the time of year when we start getting bored, begin to feel dissatisfied with anything that starts to feel monotonous or predictable.  By February, it becomes unbearable.

I don't have an answer for you.  In our house, I plan a unit study and a vacation around February, something to get us feeling excited again.  By the end of March the spring starts to peek through and encourage us to be more outside, and by the middle of April we feel like we can power through to the end again.

This year's unit is Da Vinci. A little longer than we would take in a usual history study, but tying in art, math, and science for a larger piece.

I've never done a unit study. Do you craft this yourself or buy something prepackaged?

[HomeAgain]

2 minutes ago, Spirea said:

I've never done a unit study. Do you craft this yourself or buy something prepackaged?

A little of both.  This time it's homemade, drawing in skills/topics I want to continue working on with him but in a more fun way.  I'll mark off the applicable objectives in our regular work so we skip those lessons.

Moving Beyond The Page has been well loved here when I can't/don't have time to pull something together myself.  I just pick a book I think will be enjoyed and we go through that single guide together.

[Dianthus]

Just now, HomeAgain said:

A little of both.  This time it's homemade, drawing in skills/topics I want to continue working on with him but in a more fun way.  I'll mark off the applicable objectives in our regular work so we skip those lessons.

Moving Beyond The Page has been well loved here when I can't/don't have time to pull something together myself.  I just pick a book I think will be enjoyed and we go through that single guide together.

I thought MBtP was a year long set up. Didn't realize you could do segments. I was interested in Further Up and Further In because Narnia is well loved here. I didn't want to commit to it for a year as it didn't look like it would provide much depth. I think a 1-2 week unit study would be perfect when we need a break from the mundane.

Would you mind sharing your DaVinci study?

[mathmarm]

9 hours ago, Spirea said:

What are you doing? 

I guess it depends on your situation. Is your son happy, engaged, bored? Are you teaching other children? Can you afford time to do more? 

We are hitting the basics. His PreK-2 years were very 3Rs focused and geared towards developing skills. As a result, he is a very good reader and uses reading to learn history and science. He's very strong in math. He's very happy--he has loads of time to play and pursue hobbies.

He does his work with a good attitude. He's a go-along-kind of kid, so he engages easily with his work.

7 hours ago, Clemsondana said:

I don't understand what 'great' would look like for you.  It seems like everything is going well and learning is happening.  If you just want to add some stretch or challenge but don't want to disrupt everything that is going well, I would just add some challenge work occasionally (challenging word problems from Singapore, any of the assortment of puzzle books from the Critical Thinking Company) or add some self-exploration time with something like snap circuits and Kinex sets or add Friday afternoon science/engineering videos (I just finished the 6 episodes of 'When Big Things Go Wrong' with one of my kids, and during the 2019 shutdown we watched Extinct or Alive) and then talk about what you learned or let kid draw pictures of it in a notebook.  

I'd try to figure out what goal is making you feel uneasy.  Do you feel like your kid isn't learning to deal with challenge?  Kids need to learn that at some point, but not every subject every year.  If the goal is 'know this content by the end of 3rd grade' and you are on track to do that, then all is well.  I've got kids who can do advanced work and I've had to realize that sometimes good enough is indeed good enough.  

He loves Snap Circuits and K'Nex. We have so...many...K'Nex. We might do a  big build project in January.
Ultimately, that bolded is what we're working on this semester. Sometimes, Good enough is just....good enough.

 

7 hours ago, HomeAgain said:

It's December break.

This is the time of year when we start getting bored, begin to feel dissatisfied with anything that starts to feel monotonous or predictable.  By February, it becomes unbearable...

Thank you for saying this! It could just be the season too! We're going to keep things as-is for now, and re-evaluate later.

 

Thank you ladies.

[seemesew]

I agree @HomeAgainits December and everything is boring and it seems like nothing is great this time of year 😉

Also 3rd grade is still so young I think we push harder than we need to at that age. Just because a kid can do something doesn't mean they should so just because your son could do harder or better things doesn't mean he should. If its going well then its going well! Maybe just add some interest led studies like mentioned above by doing a unit study to break things up. 

[HomeAgain]

18 hours ago, Spirea said:

I thought MBtP was a year long set up. Didn't realize you could do segments. I was interested in Further Up and Further In because Narnia is well loved here. I didn't want to commit to it for a year as it didn't look like it would provide much depth. I think a 1-2 week unit study would be perfect when we need a break from the mundane.

Would you mind sharing your DaVinci study?

Oh, yeah, we've done units from MBTP for years now.  It's probably a more full study if you include every subject for the unit, but it's fine to do them individually.  I'm considering one for Newton At The Center, since we're using it anyway.

Our Da Vinci study is relaxed and engaging at the same time.  The spines I'm using are:

• The Second Mrs. Giaconda (art, political history, language)
• Leonardo's Machines (science, math)
• Leonardo's Horse (math)
• A foldout biographical timeline

So our goal is to work through Da Vinci's life and understand
1. the teaching/learning method of Renaissance artists and what makes the Mona Lisa so peculiar
2. how Da Vinci's machines were influenced by what was going on in his world
3. regional dialects/languages of Italy and how Latin was still a unifier
4. the mathematics involved: ratios with Leonardo's Horse (redrawing it at two scales), the amount of force needed for machines like his catapult or bows and experimenting with different velocities, how his bridge works like a 3D parabolic arc - and calculating the slope and pattern of each individual strand with it on paper first, then building a model, and hopefully during the spring we'll build a human size one in the backyard.
 

We'll spend about three weeks, and then quickly move through until we get to Shakespeare, where we'll slow down again in April and do a full unit, then top off with a review.

[Frances]

Is he learning an instrument or a foreign language? It sounds like things are going really well with the basics and that he is a happy and engaged learner with lots of time to pursue his hobbies. Maybe just adding something extra would make you feel better about the overall situation.

[Xahm]

I hear you! I have kids who are very capable and can do amazing things, but they are kids and have lots of time. Letting them have their mental space to play and be creative is really important. 

I "benefit" from being stretched thin between 4 kids. If I only had one kid like this, I would be tempted to add more and more to keep myself entertained. If you think that might be part of your antsiness, I would find something you want to study and study that where he can see you. Not only will you be learning, he'll get a wonderful example of life long learning. When I do that sort of thing, my kids become really interested in what I'm learning, too.

[LauraClark]

3rd grade kind of does seem a bit blah with a lot of subjects. With math they are improving their arithmetic skills (compared to 1st where they were just learning and later grades when they have mastered arithmetic and add other things). With reading too-they are improving their reading skills; they aren't just learning like a couple years ago and they aren't to the point where they can just run and read whatever. It is kind of like a "just improving the skills you already learned" kind of year. Can you add in something new? Maybe cursive (although I guess that would be more writing) or typing or computer coding? Maybe learn a language or an instrument?  Can you skip lessons in math if it seems too easy for him (although we're doing that and it's still kind of blah cause all the arithmetic stuff can be pretty similar)?  I'm there with you-I've got my second child in 3rd right now. 

[2_girls_mommy]

On 12/31/2021 at 9:20 PM, Frances said:

Is he learning an instrument or a foreign language? It sounds like things are going really well with the basics and that he is a happy and engaged learner with lots of time to pursue his hobbies. Maybe just adding something extra would make you feel better about the overall situation.

I agree with this.  For us, these extras come in through co-ops and scouting.  It is a new semester at co-op, so after a Christmas break (which for us this year was extra long because of a medical procedure and recovery,) of baking, Christmas books and crafts and movies and Bible studies, etc. which is a whole different kind of learning, but still learning, we move into the change of classes at co-op and back into scouts.  Scout badges and field trips give us all kinds of interesting things to learn about and focus on.  So even if our core classes and books at home aren't changing much it feels new to pick them back up after a break and with the new stuff coming up to look at. 

[2_girls_mommy]

On 1/1/2022 at 12:54 PM, Xahm said:

I hear you! I have kids who are very capable and can do amazing things, but they are kids and have lots of time. Letting them have their mental space to play and be creative is really important. 

I "benefit" from being stretched thin between 4 kids. If I only had one kid like this, I would be tempted to add more and more to keep myself entertained. If you think that might be part of your antsiness, I would find something you want to study and study that where he can see you. Not only will you be learning, he'll get a wonderful example of life long learning. When I do that sort of thing, my kids become really interested in what I'm learning, too.

This is so true for all ages- my senior and my 2nd grader both join into and learn from whatever I am into at the time.  Sometimes we do these things and they just pick up things and enhance what they are doing with me as free time and study breaks.  Sometimes we get so into learning something new that it becomes a class we create and use for school because of our interest! 

[wendyroo]

Sometimes I find the only way to offer my kids sufficient challenge, while also keeping things simple, is to make a big leap and just have faith that they will keep up and fill in any gaps that aren't explicitly taught.

For example, one of our favorite science read alouds, that my kids still refer to to this day, was The Story of Life in 25 Fossils: Tales of Intrepid Fossil Hunters and the Wonders of Evolution. Now that was a tough read aloud - deep, dense, complicated, and full of words I could not pronounce. Based on my experience, I would call it a college-level book. My kids (and I) were fascinated and learned so much...they were 4, 6, 8, and 10 years old at the time.

But, it only worked because I wasn't trying to drag them through "age-appropriate" (or even moderately advanced) science at the same time. I had to have faith that my 6 year old would figure out shadows and ice melting and pushing and pulling forces, and all the other riveting topics in kindergarten science books, just from living in our house and moving through this world and having engaging discussions about college level books.

And as the kids get older, it can be harder to have faith. My 12 year old learns Spanish by reading novels and newspapers, writing comic strips, watching Spanish shows and YouTube videos, and playing online games with his tutor. It looks nothing like a standard Spanish 4 curriculum, and there are some tasks, like filling out a conjugation chart, that I will never ask of him because the results would shatter my confidence; there is always niggling doubt in my head about all the vocab and concepts and drills and conjugations that he is not covering. (Except of course he is learning them, just not in a way I can see or quantify.) But in the big picture, my faith is paying off. He is consuming, interacting with, and producing much more complex, natural, and useful language than I ever did in my 6 years of studying Spanish. He can't tell you the mnemonic for when to use the subjunctive mood (whereas I learned three different ones over my years of study), but unlike me, he actual can and does use the subjunctive mood!

I guess the difference for me boils down to "covering" material versus "learning" things. I have made my peace (to some extent) with finding interesting things for my kids learn from and not worrying (to some extent) about all the things we aren't "covering". So if I found myself describing most subjects as "okay", "lite", "coasting", and lacking challenge, then I would probably choose a couple subjects and make some wild leaps...NOT in addition to what we were currently doing, but as a replacement for the things that don't sound all that inspiring to start with.

Also, I will second or third the previous posters that mentioned languages and instruments if you are not currently doing those. For my kids, Spanish and piano (along with science, history, logic, etc) offer authentic, interesting opportunities to practice and improve their 3R skills.

[mathmarm]

Thank you Ladies for your input! I have decided that it takes tremendous courage as a Homeschooling Parent to stick to your intuition and allow a time in life to (seemingly) be good, instead of great.

When I think of all that he could be doing, but isn't, it's hard to not feel something stir me into making sure he does more. But the more I look at what he's doing, the more I am satisfied by and at peace with how gentle it is.

Hubby has began to say that a "gelling year" is a really good thing for him.

[8filltheheart]

10 hours ago, mathmarm said:

Thank you Ladies for your input! I have decided that it takes tremendous courage as a Homeschooling Parent to stick to your intuition and allow a time in life to (seemingly) be good, instead of great.

When I think of all that he could be doing, but isn't, it's hard to not feel something stir me into making sure he does more. But the more I look at what he's doing, the more I am satisfied by and at peace with how gentle it is.

Hubby has began to say that a "gelling year" is a really good thing for him.

It is way too easy to fall into the trap of thinking that bc they seem to be learning easily that we need to have them do more bc to us it also appears to be simple material.  But, imagine yourself being given something new to learn every day.  What would lead you to be encouraged and positive to face each new lesson?  One that made you feel slightly overwhelmed constantly or one where you experienced success and felt really good about yourself bc you could master the content?

There is a place for challenging our children, but, no, it does not have to be every subject, every lesson, every day.  My youngest is the most globally gifted of all our children.  Some have been "spikier" gifted, but she learns everything easily and is also physically agile and musically inclined.  We let her start violin in hopes of offering her a challenge.  Nope, not really a challenge there, either.  But, she is learning that small details matter and that sometimes racing ahead at the expense of those details really doesn't equal better.  She can memorize any piece in a few days; she can play the notes; but really good technique and dynamics--that takes practice, patience, and attention.  

FWIW, I would say that 90% of our kids academic studies are pleasurable.  I design courses around their interests.  We read books, watch documentaries, talk a lot.  They never touch workbooks.  I don't give tests.  Writing assignments are across subject matter, so not lots of busy work.  (They have never written a book report, ever.)  Writing assignments have very specific learning objectives (what are they studying that I want them to remember the most or learn more about).  They graduate from high school and go on to be highly successful college students/graduates with great careers.  There is absolutely nothing about being frustrated in learning that equates to success.  The bigger picture is the willingness to persevere when things are difficult.  Having self-confidence that they can learn/master content bc they know how learn......that mentality can carry them through adulthood struggles. 

[Dianthus]

@8filltheheart

I like this approach, but I also have to meet state school requirements and provide grades. What is your curriculum? Do you design everything? I think your youngest is around 12? My oldest dd is the same age.

[8filltheheart]

6 hours ago, Spirea said:

@8filltheheart

I like this approach, but I also have to meet state school requirements and provide grades. What is your curriculum? Do you design everything? I think your youngest is around 12? My oldest dd is the same age.

When I have to provide grades, I can and do. I teach to mastery, so in skill areas, we don't progress until mastered.  (All of my kids' transcripts have grades.  In my course descriptions/counselor letter I state that I teach to mastery and I clarify how grades are assigned--typically essays and oral exams.)

My 6th grader is in Foerster's alg 1.  She is taking Russian with a tutor.  Everything else is designed by me.  I would have zero problems identifying my curriculum (book list/syllabus) if I currently lived in a state that required reporting (I have btdt multiple times over the yrs; we have moved a lot and have homeschooled in multiple states.)  My courses aren't haphazard, winging it.  I spend quite a bit of time researching materials and generating a list of materials and general plan.  I don't create day by day plans for the entire yr.  I create about 6-9 weeks' worth of daily plans at a time.  That allows me to pace/supplement/detour in a natural way to fit our flow.  It makes learning enjoyable for all of us, me included.

[seemesew]

On 1/10/2022 at 6:05 AM, 8filltheheart said:

When I have to provide grades, I can and do. I teach to mastery, so in skill areas, we don't progress until mastered.  (All of my kids' transcripts have grades.  In my course descriptions/counselor letter I state that I teach to mastery and I clarify how grades are assigned--typically essays and oral exams.)

My 6th grader is in Foerster's alg 1.  She is taking Russian with a tutor.  Everything else is designed by me.  I would have zero problems identifying my curriculum (book list/syllabus) if I currently lived in a state that required reporting (I have btdt multiple times over the yrs; we have moved a lot and have homeschooled in multiple states.)  My courses aren't haphazard, winging it.  I spend quite a bit of time researching materials and generating a list of materials and general plan.  I don't create day by day plans for the entire yr.  I create about 6-9 weeks' worth of daily plans at a time.  That allows me to pace/supplement/detour in a natural way to fit our flow.  It makes learning enjoyable for all of us, me included.

Off topic: I really love the way you explain how you go about making your own individualized plans! Does your book Homeschooling at the helm go into how you do that more?

[8filltheheart]

Just now, seemesew said:

Off topic: I really love the way you explain how you go about making your own individualized plans! Does your book Homeschooling at the helm go into how you do that more?

Yes, though I have altered how I approach some high school history assignments since I wrote it.

FWIW, I am planning on publishing my history/geography/lit  (integrated) plans this summer that I have been using with my students this yr (10th, 6th, and 5th graders). 

[seemesew]

1 minute ago, 8filltheheart said:

Yes, though I have altered how I approach some high school history assignments since I wrote it.

FWIW, I am planning on publishing my history/geography/lit  (integrated) plans this summer that I have been using with my students this yr (10th, 6th, and 5th graders). 

That will be great to see! I can't wait!

I'll have to check out your book. I've hit a point where I'm wanting to change history/science after 3 years of using a program and want to do more interest led in those areas.

 

[kbutton]

On 12/30/2021 at 9:53 AM, mathmarm said:

  He's using his reading, math and drawing skills, but we feel that he's kind of coasting in those area, instead of being really challenged and actively improving.

Many third graders are still learning to use their skills without finding it frustrating. Letting him enjoy that is a big deal! Some of us have kids that are both advanced/capable and also behind/need help. They are spiky. It's SO NICE when they can use their skills without frustration to learn something. 🙂 

On 12/30/2021 at 9:57 PM, mathmarm said:

 He's very happy--he has loads of time to play and pursue hobbies.

For my kids, this has paid dividends later (they are now teens). Both of mine are actively pursuing a "hobby" as a potential career--one almost certainly, and for the other, it's a very good direction for now even if it doesn't work out. (Older DS is a skilled carpenter and in a vocational program to continue; younger DS is interested in becoming a music therapist--he definitely has the personality for it.) Open-ended play time is a gift to embrace.