Miss first name

[happi duck]

I'm not in or from the south. 

Our church has kids say "Miss first name" or "Mr. first name".  When written down they use "Ms. First name" but still pronounced it "Miss".

This always looks wrong to me.

If you are from a place where "Miss first name" is common, how do you write this down?

 

 

[WildflowerMom]

I use Ms or Mrs.  

[vonfirmath]

13 minutes ago, happi duck said:

I'm not in or from the south. 

Our church has kids say "Miss first name" or "Mr. first name".  When written down they use "Ms. First name" but still pronounced it "Miss".

This always looks wrong to me.

If you are from a place where "Miss first name" is common, how do you write this down?

 

 

"Miss Sarah"

[73349]

We say and write, "Ms. Jane." That way kids (and parents) don't have to keep track of each person's title.

[Spryte]

The kids around here pronounce it “Miss” and write it Ms. It feels a little bit off to me, but as long as everyone’s happy, I’m good.

(Said by the person who royally failed the Red Eye Gravy English test in Linguistics.)

ETA: I just googled and can’t find a copy, but it was a widely used teaching tool about real world communication. Most of us failed due to looking for things like grammar, punctuation, spelling. It was humbling.)

Edited October 26, 2021 by Spryte

[Melissa Louise]

The only place I'm called Miss first name is at school. All my documents say Ms First/Last name. I honestly don't care about the kids not saying Ms but I don't want to be recorded as Miss. 

[Dmmetler]

I'm in the South, and I've been Ms. Donna in writing and Miss Donna in speaking since I was about 14 and helped out in Children's church each Sunday, except for when I taught in public schools, or at the college level. 

[MooCow]

1 hour ago, WildflowerMom said:

I use Ms or Mrs.  

Yup

[PeterPan]

15 minutes ago, Spryte said:

(Said by the person who royally failed the Red Eye Gravy English test in Linguistics.)

Ok, fess up, what is this?

[katilac]

Deep south, and yep, it's mostly written Ms. and said as Miss. 

You have to enunciate a bit more intentionally to say "Ms." 

It doesn't bother me at all. 

[Bambam]

I'm in TX. It is very common for kids to call their friend's moms by Miss First Name unless (from my experience) the speaking kid's mom was raised in the northeast (and then their kids say Mrs. Last Name). The few times I've seen it written, it has been Miss FirstName.  Young adults here often refer to older ladies by Miss First Name too if they have some sort of personal knowledge of each other. I believe it is a sign of respect. I'm in my 50s, all my kids are young adults, and their friends still refer to me as Miss First Name. (At least in my hearing, no clue how they might refer to me when I can't hear them!)

[bibiche]

12 minutes ago, Bambam said:

I'm in TX. It is very common for kids to call their friend's moms by Miss First Name unless (from my experience) the speaking kid's mom was raised in the northeast (and then their kids say Mrs. Last Name). The few times I've seen it written, it has been Miss FirstName.  Young adults here often refer to older ladies by Miss First Name too if they have some sort of personal knowledge of each other. I believe it is a sign of respect. I'm in my 50s, all my kids are young adults, and their friends still refer to me as Miss First Name. (At least in my hearing, no clue how they might refer to me when I can't hear them!)

How do they know what the mothers’ first names are? Do they ask? And do they ask first if said mothers are from the Northeast?

[happi duck]

This is really helpful!  I like being called Miss First name but spelling it Ms. always seemed wrong because as a kid that was "Miz" not "Miss".

 

 

[happi duck]

31 minutes ago, katilac said:

Deep south, and yep, it's mostly written Ms. and said as Miss. 

You have to enunciate a bit more intentionally to say "Ms." 

It doesn't bother me at all. 

This is exactly what gets done at church.  If someone in the deep south agrees I can stop wondering if it's right!

[Spryte]

42 minutes ago, PeterPan said:

Ok, fess up, what is this?

I added this later, in an edit: ETA: I just googled and can’t find a copy, but it was a widely used teaching tool about real world communication. Most of us failed due to looking for things like grammar, punctuation, spelling. It was humbling.) 
 

It was pretty standard in undergrad Linguistics classes a while back, sort of an ice breaker. Most people circled all kinds of grammar errors, etc, and the gist was that none of the parts we circled impacted the communication. Ultimately, there were no “errors.” It was painful—absolutely painful—to read, though! It was a bit freeing in the sense that I forgave myself—and others—lots of little colloquialisms and errors. Sort of like pronouncing Ms “Miss.” I just kind of roll with it, and figure all these little kids around here are just communicating the way everyone around them does. 

I can tend a bit to the grammar police side, IRL, if I let myself, so I try to keep that test in mind. 

 

On a slightly different note: I’ve only had kids in the mid-Atlantic area. They all use Ms (pronounced Miss, here) or Mr First Name. In areas where this is not common, so they just use First Name? (I would like that so much better!)

Oh! Almost forgot, I also occasionally get Ms Kid’s Name’s Mom! 🤣
 

 

Edited October 26, 2021 by Spryte

[katilac]

8 minutes ago, bibiche said:

How do they know what the mothers’ first names are? Do they ask? And do they ask first if said mothers are from the Northeast?

They don't have to ask, that's how you introduce yourself to them (or how others introduce you). 

Hi, Bibiche, I'm Ms. Katilac. I'm glad you came over to play, let me know if you need anything. 

Hey, Bibiche, this is Posey's mom, Ms. Katilac. Say hi before you go play. 

Presumably the moms from the northeast introduce themselves as Mrs. Lastname. I currently can't think of a single person I know who uses the last name, though! I do remember one mom who did when I was a kid. I don't remember if she told us or just introduced herself or what, but all the kids knew it was Ms. Kerri and Ms. Dena and Mrs. Jones, lol. 

 

[MercyA]

The kids in my Sunday School class call me Miss Mercy. I'd never really used that title before, but I like it. 🙂 Mrs. Mercy sounds awkward and I don't care for Ms..

One of the kids wrote my name on our chalkboard the other day and spelled it "Miss." I don't think I've ever seen in written down by adults, but I doubt anyone would spell it Ms., as almost no one uses that title around here. 

Our pastor's older kids call me Mrs. Lastname, but the littlest (who is in my class) calls me Miss Mercy. 🙂 My daughter's friends call me Mrs. Lastname, but that's because that's what they were taught, not because I ever introduced myself that way. I tend to say, "Hi, I'm DD's mom," which I suppose isn't very helpful to them. 😉 

[Bambam]

28 minutes ago, bibiche said:

How do they know what the mothers’ first names are? Do they ask? And do they ask first if said mothers are from the Northeast?

You know, I have no idea how they know the mothers' first names? Maybe from over hearing them? I don't remember anyone asking. My kids were born here, and everyone just called moms by Miss First Name, so they introduced me as their mom, Miss First Name.  When the kids were really young, I was often referred to as Daughter's name Mom (Emily's Mom). 

The mothers from the northeast (only two that I know) are the ones that correct their children not to say Miss First Name but Mrs Last Name. This generally causes all the kids to pause for a second, and then go on about their business.  I've assumed, but never asked, that they feel the Miss First Name is too familiar for a child to address an adult. 

[PeterPan]

41 minutes ago, Spryte said:

It was pretty standard in undergrad Linguistics classes a while back, sort of an ice breaker.

I took linguistics classes at two universities, don't remember doing that. But it sounds interesting. If you find it, do share! 🙂 

Edited October 26, 2021 by PeterPan

[Guest]

It’s a very common practice here to use “Miss First Name” when speaking about teachers, coaches or your parent’s friends. (Mr. First Name as well.) I almost always write women’s titles as Ms., unless it’s definitely a very young lady or a child. So, “Miss Jordyn” for the teenaged babysitter, for example. But “Ms. Valerie” for my mom’s best friend. 

[73349]

In the Northeast, I think only preschool teachers are Miss/Ms. Firstname. Your friend's mom or your piano teacher is Mrs. Lastname or if the families are close (and/or Quaker-influenced), perhaps just Firstname.

Edited October 26, 2021 by Carolina Wren

[Jann in TX]

I teach online-- students from all over USA and some international students too.

I sign my name Jann P*****

Students will call me Ms. Jann, Miss Jann, Mrs P***** and a few would use just 'Jann'.

Personally, I prefer Mrs. P**** (because I'm OLD and taught in PS) but I'm fine with any of the above-- as long as they are respectful.

One thing I'm still not used to is 'Ma'am' -- where I grew up through 4th grade (Bay Area 60-70's) that was a name of DISRESPECT...in Jr High we moved to Oklahoma-- it was a sign of RESPECT (most of the time).  At home we NEVER said 'Yes, Ma'am' or 'Yes, Sir'.... instant grounding!  My older girls were born in Illinois (near Chicago)  They said 'Yes, please' or 'No, thank you' but NEVER 'Ma'am' or 'Sir'...  we moved to Texas when they started school-- boy did it take some time to retrain them!!!

I am teaching my Grandson 'Ma'am' and 'Sir' because we are near several military bases so it is used OFTEN in our community. 

 

[lauraw4321]

Yup, Alabama. Miss First Name. If I wrote it it would be Ms., even though it’s said “Miss” not “Miz”. 
 

Sir / ma’am is less common than when I was a kid. Maybe a lot of transplants have changed that?

[Garga]

What’s weird to me is when adults my age or older call me Miss Garga. 

Where I live, no one does that, but I recently got a job that’s an hour south of here—an hour south of the Mason Dixon line (I live right over the line). And some of the adults there will call me Miss Garga. They are not deferring to me—they’re just showing friendly mutual respect. But it sure does throw me! I’m thinking of picking up on it and using it back at them, to also show friendly mutual respect. When in Rome and all that.

 

[katilac]

56 minutes ago, Garga said:

What’s weird to me is when adults my age or older call me Miss Garga. 

Where I live, no one does that, but I recently got a job that’s an hour south of here—an hour south of the Mason Dixon line (I live right over the line). And some of the adults there will call me Miss Garga. They are not deferring to me—they’re just showing friendly mutual respect. But it sure does throw me! I’m thinking of picking up on it and using it back at them, to also show friendly mutual respect. When in Rome and all that.

 

Super common here! (metro New Orleans)