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Why is it considered “stalking” if a person looks at board member’s profile page?


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Just now, Not_a_Number said:

This is the thread that doesn't end, 

It goes on and on, my friend, 

Some people started posting there, 

Not knowing what it was, 

And then they had to post there forever just because... 

Nope.  That's Ignore This Thread on the Education Board.  (We even have our own theme song to this tune. . . )

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2 hours ago, hjffkj said:

What you describe has two components. 1. They were indeed stalking you. Not criminally, but the widely accepted innocent internet stalking that is being discussed here by everyone but the OP, whether they agree it is healthy/ok or not. 2. They were trolling you during the process of stalking you.

 

To the posters who have actual experience with being stalked by someone with criminal intent, I'm sorry that happened and I hear you when you say the other definition is hurtful to you. I will think about your comments further in relation to my feelings about the word. Thank you for having a respectful discussion about the issue. Also, I remember that thread about the word crazy and as a person who struggles greatly with mental illness still couldn't find a reason to be upset by the word, but I don't use it as often anymore.

Much like your experience with the word crazy, as someone who has also had an IRL stalker and it was quite scary, I don't feel "minimized" by the tongue-in-cheek use of the word, either online or off. 🤷🏻‍♀️ But, I try to respect that other people experience and process their trauma differently, so will try to remember not to use the word stalking in a joking manner. 

From now on, my voluptuous digits will have me creeping profiles. Apologies in advance. 

Edited by fraidycat
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4 minutes ago, Jean in Newcastle said:

Nope.  That's Ignore This Thread on the Education Board.  (We even have our own theme song to this tune. . . )

I posted in that thread way back in the first few pages. I logged out of WTM for a very long time and was surprised to see it still going when I came back. Some of you have got stamina!

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12 minutes ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

The bigger question in my mind is ...

who actually pays attention to who visits their profile? It has never occurred to me to track who views my profile.

I have way more important things to do with my time 🤣

I don't normally ever look at my profile. I mean--why would I? I know what's there.

But I confess-- once this thread started I had to go see who'd visited. And I'm guessing some of y'all did the same thing. 😉 

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17 minutes ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

The bigger question in my mind is ...

who actually pays attention to who visits their profile? It has never occurred to me to track who views my profile.

I have way more important things to do with my time 🤣

The only time I notice is when I click on mine by accident.

Or I'm there trying to figure out (yet again) how to update my signature. 

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2 minutes ago, MissLemon said:

None of y'all have visited my profile in a week. 

Now I am offended.  Am I not stalk-worthy? *sulk*sigh* 😉

Just got nosy. I even clicked on something. I rapidly scrolled through your past posts. I hope you feel appropriately impacted by my curiousity. 

(I still maintain there's nothing much to see on anyone's profile!)

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But, don't you have to visit someone's profile page in order to PM them? 

Anyway, I am always clicking on "find content" of the profiles of so many old posters looking for their curriculum recommendations from years past (some of them are no longer actively participating on the WTM boards.)

Funnily enough, I seem to have read a lot of books in my youth where the characters angrily "stalked away" ... 

Edited by mathnerd
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1 minute ago, mathnerd said:

But, don't you have to visit someone's profile page in order to PM them? 

Anyway, I am always clicking on "find content" of the profiles of so many old posters looking for their curriculum recommendations from years past (some of them are no longer actively participating on the WTM boards.)

Funnily enough, I seem to have read a lot of books in my youth where the characters angrily "stalked away" ... 

No, I can PM by going to the three bars at the top of the page, and then clicking on the envelope icon. 

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I use the profile feature. Sometimes I miss a major post about something that obviously happened based on a current post, usually with illness or kids or something like that where it helps to understand the background. Sometimes I seem to see a trend in someones posting and it's much more efficient to click and look back and see if that trend is making sense. Especially in the really long posts on covid, it's useful to find past studies we've talked about when you know who posted it but have no idea when that was. It's much easier than paging back 30-40, and sometimes more like 100+pages to find something I think I remember.  

In more than a decade I've never really thought about who's looking at my profile.  It's public. After all the uproar, I realize I have mine blocked, so I have no idea who's visiting my profile, and I'm okay with that. You're all off the hook. 😉

Edited by melmichigan
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On 9/21/2021 at 11:50 AM, pinball said:

It doesn’t seem like a joke if people are apologizing and claiming not be a stalker.

Nevertheless

On 9/21/2021 at 3:57 PM, Bootsie said:

So what culture thinks and teaches that stalking is funny and a joke?  Anyone I know who has experienced serious stalking does not belong to a culture that thinks it is funny.   I think there have been cultures that have been taught that things are funny, and people laugh at, that are underlying racist, that the person laughing thinks they are laughing because it is funny in their culture and would not consider themselves racist.  

When I heare someone joke about stalking, it is not that I think they are accusing anyone of a serious crime--the issue is that I think they are taking something that is extremely serious and joking about it.  It isn't the accusation that some of us find troubling it is the trivilization of stalking that we have trouble with. 

Nobody is laughing at anyone experiencing a scary, dangerous person following them around intending harm or intimidation.  The trouble is that words will take on colloquial definitions.  A given word can have wildly different definitions that are loosely related.  In the case of “stalking” Webster’s dictionary will have different definitions than Urban dictionary. 

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