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What are your dreams or plans for retirement?


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We just bought our retirement home in Alabama, and bought one with a view, a wonderful yard, fruit trees, gardening options, and is a great gathering place for the whole family. There is room for our mothers if they live that long. Currently, our daughter, son in law, and two grandsons live in it, and we have a suite. We will come and go from the house for the next five years when dh officially retires.

We intend  on not being there all the time though. We are keeping a small place by Lake Huron here in Michigan for a summer place because Bama is too hot and sweaty for summer. We also will be VanLife camping all over the United States with the house in Alabama as home base. My sister lives in France so we will be making regular excursions to see her and my brother in law.

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I hope to retire by 60 and then will continue to sub teach as I love it...but want more flexibility.

Then I will continue to help my 3 kids who have extra challenges plus the son in law.  I hope to do some traveling.

I also want to be the person who is just available.....to watch kids so a mom can go to the doctor, to bring a meal yo someone, to drive someone to the doctor, to show up and help a friend....basically be the church lady who can just be there when there is a need.

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No retirement dreams here bc we will need to work until we actually cannot. 70+ for sure.

I am 40 years older than my kids. I would like to live long enough to see them launched and maybe meet a grandbaby or two. 

If we had money and could retire, I’d spend most winters in FL, walking on the beach and enjoying sunshine. 

Edited by ScoutTN
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Go to college apparently. 😏I'll probably be mid 50s before I finish. Maybe work until 67, who knows.

I would like to travel a bit more, take a real vacation. I can see having a pretty quiet retirement. I want a fenced back yard for a dog. I want to have friends over and spend long evenings on the porch. I'd like to spend time with ds, study more languages, write a book, and do some hiking/camping.

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I keep thinking about this.  When can I stop having work stress?  I really think a life without anxiety over client stuff would be near paradise.

Of course that probably isn't realistic.  😛

Honestly, my picture of my ideal retirement changes daily.  Sometimes I just want to be home alone, enjoying tea, music, yoga, old movies, and naps.  Other times I want to be out enjoying our national parks, rec center, library programs ....

I can't decide whether I dread being alone, or dread never being alone.

Hopefully my kids will still come around, and I would like to have a reasonable volunteer gig, maybe with kids (but not too stressful).  Would love to visit with family and friends (whoever is still around when that time comes).

The organizer in me envisions me keeping a neat, clean house and well-maintained personal files (health, financial, etc.).  We'll see.

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I always planned to just be available to my four dc and their families for whatever was needed. If local I could help run kids to activities, bring dinner when people are sick, etc. just little helps. If out of town I want to be able to drop everything and go help when needed.

However. I am finding myself less likely to want to surrender myself to family life and needs than I imagined. I was always the sacrificial homeschool mom. I’m getting a little more fiesty in my middle age and I want to do what I want to do when I want to do it. Haha. No grandkids on the horizon yet so maybe I just need a break and I’ll come back around.

Dh wants to travel. I find myself getting little more anxious as I get older. Now with Covid the idea of getting sick/quarantined out of the country makes that less appealing.

I guess we will need to figure it out! We have worked hard and saved and can do something nice if we can decide what that is.

(We are 47 yo so we have a little time to figure it out.)

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I'll be around 60 when the kids are properly launched. I hope by then we've been able to sell the business, thereby paying off our mortgage. My husband can then experience his dream of sitting in front of the TV/internet non stop for the rest of his life, while I plan to travel. Hopefully covid or whatever plague we have going on then will let me do so. 

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I have no imagination for my future plans. I figure I will work till 65 (or 70 if I still have my wits). I have a decent retirement fund, so I should be able to live independently, unless expenses outpace my income in the future.  DD22 and I are super close, so if that continues, I hope to live near them. I would like to start doing art again, and I can't do that in a house full of people. I am recently divorced, and don't plan to get remarried, so I will probably be living on my own, hopefully with a little studio niche. 

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I hope I am still alive and healthy to have time with my family. My mom, my aunt and my grandmother...none of them lived past their 60s. I don't have any dreams beyond that.

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DH retired a couple of years ago (he is 13 years older than I am) with plans that we would travel extensively during my time off--we had a big trip planned for last summer, but then COVID hit, so our plans for travel have been shelved for the time being.  DH retired from his university job, but he is still active professionally and I am not sure that either of us will every fully "retire".  For him retirement is more about picking and choosing the type of work he wants to do (and I think I will be the same).  Much will depend upon where our kids land and the health of some relatives.  

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I hope dh retires by 60 (if not earlier), I'll be 57. We want to travel domestically and internationally. Be able to spend time with children/grandchildren and help here and there. I'd like to explore hobbies more like gardening, cooking, and find new ones- try different things. Continue being active, hopefully with dh. Explore some volunteer options and see where I can fit in and help.

Edited by Soror
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2 hours ago, TexasProud said:

Also, just curious... how is it different than what will you do when the kids are out of the house? For us retirement coincided with the graduation of our last child.

For us, our youngest graduated high school/homeschool when I was 50 and DH 54. He won't retire until he is 62, and I went back into the work place. So since our retirement plans are dependent on not holding down salaried positions that offer very little flexibility, what we do now is not the same as what we will do then despite the fact that we are fairly empty nested. Two boys are going off to grad school in 2022, and youngest ds graduates with his BS in April, 2022. So we will be truly empty nest at that point because none do them will be living around here as employment/grad school options in their respective fields are not available. But, dh won't be retired. My job in community fine arts has been gutted by covid and isn't coming back, so I am working off and on as a gig pianist. I am not sure if I will take on other work or not.

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We’re starting our planning for it even though it’s not coming anytime soon. We’re selling our current house and planning to move to a Chicago suburb. We’ve visited several times and actually have friends nearby. We want to live somewhere that we can walk everywhere and rarely need use of a car. Both dc have talked often of living near Chicago as well (least expensive big city area we all enjoy) for the same reasons we want to be there, so we could all see each other easily. Our biggest concern was how high the taxes are but we’ve decided they’re well worth it after living in the types of places we’ve lived so far. 

Dh has worked from home for years and we’ve already travelled a bunch as it was a priority for us as dc were growing up, so we don’t feel a need to do so much of that later. We just want to live in a place where there is lots to enjoy locally and that is extremely walkable. 

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My biggest dream is to have land and space for several loves of mine—dogs, a greenhouse to tinker around in, and maybe a cat or two.😁

Also a house to go with it to hold my children and any (of their) future spouses and grandchildren.  
 

ideally, someplace beautiful, but I’m not quite sure on location yet in this dream😊

Edited by mmasc
Clarifying that I don’t want future spouses 🤣
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My dream was to run a used bookstore for pocket money😊but now with the world changing so much I don’t know if that is feasible.

we are in our forever house, but it will need some remodeling as we age so we can stay here as long as possible. Our place is big enough that if the world does go crazy, all of our kids can come back and live in the big house or build their own place on the property.

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4 hours ago, TexasProud said:

Also, just curious... how is it different than what will you do when the kids are out of the house? For us retirement coincided with the graduation of our last child.

We were 50 when our son started college full time. Far too young (and too broke) to retire. 

I honestly have no dreams or plans at this point. Loosely, we assume we will quit working, or at least greatly reduce hours/change focus, at some point after 65, but I cannot visualize what our days will look like after that. With both of us working and both kids close to financially independent, we've been able to sock away a decent amount of retirement funding. We just bought a house with a mortgage we can afford on what we will bring in even after we stop working full time, and the plan is to age in place here. So, the logistics are pretty well covered.

I just have no clue what I/we will actually do with our time.

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8 minutes ago, mlktwins said:

Not to be a kill joy, but if anyone has elder care they will be responsible for down the road, the plans/dreams you have now will be changing 😞.

There may be disadvantages to spread-out generations, but they do reduce this issue.  If I retire at 67, my mother will be 106.  She's amazingly strong but the odds are against it.  She is the last of our older relatives for whom we are responsible - Husband and I are both the youngest and had older parents.

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9 minutes ago, Laura Corin said:

There may be disadvantages to spread-out generations, but they do reduce this issue.  If I retire at 67, my mother will be 106.  She's amazingly strong but the odds are against it.  She is the last of our older relatives for whom we are responsible - Husband and I are both the youngest and had older parents.

Yes.  DH is 59 and I am 54.  My dad is the last parent left and he is 86.  And we have twin 16 year olds.

My sister and sister-in-law, who are both single and in their 60's, should be taking very good care of themselves, because I won't have anything left in the tank after this.

Both my in-laws made it to 94.  They had a great, long run :-).

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When I retire I plan on emulating my grandparents. Both were immigrants and worked very hard for everything they had. 

When they retired they had a small house in a beautiful spot. A quiet, dirt paved road so hardly any traffic. He gardened, she knitted or quilted. They would always take a break around 3:00 pm to sit for a few minute in the yard with a glass of wine. They just lived a peaceful, quiet existence. That is  what I want ..... just to live peacefully and quietly.

 

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4 hours ago, mlktwins said:

Not to be a kill joy, but if anyone has elder care they will be responsible for down the road, the plans/dreams you have now will be changing 😞.

We will be super tight financially, but without this responsibility. My mom is 85 now and my DH’s sisters will take care of my MIL.

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4 hours ago, Jenny in Florida said:

We were 50 when our son started college full time. Far too young (and too broke) to retire. 

I honestly have no dreams or plans at this point. Loosely, we assume we will quit working, or at least greatly reduce hours/change focus, at some point after 65, but I cannot visualize what our days will look like after that. With both of us working and both kids close to financially independent, we've been able to sock away a decent amount of retirement funding. We just bought a house with a mortgage we can afford on what we will bring in even after we stop working full time, and the plan is to age in place here. So, the logistics are pretty well covered.

I just have no clue what I/we will actually do with our time.

Yeah, I get that.  We are much older than most parents.  Makes sense.

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5 hours ago, mlktwins said:

Yes.  DH is 59 and I am 54.  My dad is the last parent left and he is 86.  And we have twin 16 year olds.

My sister and sister-in-law, who are both single and in their 60's, should be taking very good care of themselves, because I won't have anything left in the tank after this.

Both my in-laws made it to 94.  They had a great, long run :-).

We already have eldercare. We got it young. Smacked and sandwiched between still raising kids, still homeschooling, and parents who never planned and didn't give a scrap what happened to us or our stress levels. A few weeks ago, Mark and I had an epiphany. Enough is enough. We are going to grind our own health into the ground.

So apart from our multi-generational home which they will eventually be welcome to live in, they now have responsibilities. Hire yardwork and plowing/shoveling/snow blowing done, hire drivers for medical appointments that they won't let us attend anyway so we waste a lot of time in the parking lot on top of the commute and still have no new information, hire a housekeeper once per week. Mother in law went bananas about the cost of drivers. Mark told her to sell her car that she cannot drive, and reminded her that between the proceeds of that and no longer paying for auto insurance and car maintenance, there is plenty. This week she had a driver, and a very nice teen Mennonite girl who was looking for work and was willing to mask, came to wash the kitchen up, clean the bathroom, and bake cookies.

We will do routine house maintenance eat three meals per week with them when on vacation and do that cooking, take them grocery shopping when again, not camping, help with annual taxes and paperwork, and do normal family helps family type things not physical care, nursing care, and endless running running running nor mowing/show blowing for three homes here in Michigan. It was just beginning to really take a toll. Hopefully this will be the wake up call that we can't and won't do everything, and that our siblings can either get on board or get out of the way.

Eldercare would be much easier with them under one roof, and the Alabama house is a much, much better place for that with everything handicap accessible. But mother in law refuses to work with physical and occupational therapy and is rapidly losing mobility so she may end up in a nursing facility soon. Her home is simply not convertible to handicap. So she may end up in a facility here, and then when we move, we will find a facility down there. My mom is beginning to get the idea that she cannot simply expect me to give up my husband, my grandsons, and my health to be 100% devoted to her care. Slowly, but surely, she is thinking about how to make all of this work. Recently she went back to physical therapy to increase her mobility which is a very good thing. That was a relief.

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21 hours ago, Faith-manor said:

We just bought our retirement home in Alabama, and bought one with a view, a wonderful yard, fruit trees, gardening options, and is a great gathering place for the whole family. There is room for our mothers if they live that long. Currently, our daughter, son in law, and two grandsons live in it, and we have a suite. We will come and go from the house for the next five years when dh officially retires.

We intend  on not being there all the time though. We are keeping a small place by Lake Huron here in Michigan for a summer place because Bama is too hot and sweaty for summer. We also will be VanLife camping all over the United States with the house in Alabama as home base. My sister lives in France so we will be making regular excursions to see her and my brother in law.

Welcome to Alabama! 🙂 

Edited by popmom
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Our hope is that dh will retire at 62 or 63. That depends quite a lot on what the market does in the next 10 years. 
 

We’ve been so focused on the financial planning that we haven’t stopped to think about plans once we get there. 

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Dh is 65 and plans to work a few more years if he's able (so far, so good).  I'm 52 and run my own business that I plan to continue running until I don't feel physically able to.   We have 4 years before youngest finishes high school (and I expect her to do a fairly traditional homeschool high school experience with no early college enrollment or anything).   We plan to travel, mostly camping, which is something we've been doing all along.  Covid, of course, put a damper on that the past couple year. 

We are already in our "retirement" home.   We have a small bungalow that is a little crowded with the kids but perfect size for an older couple. We are adding an addition for my mother in the next few months.  We live on a quiet dead end street in a quiet dead end neighborhood but near stores and hospitals and any other needs.  No stairs except one or two at the entry that could easily be replaced by a ramp if necessary.   

So, essentially not that much is going to really change.  

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We are holding those dreams lightly for a variety of reasons. We realized a few years ago that we needed to start really consciously enjoying life now.

My ideal retirement looks like having a beach rental we own that we block a week out of the month for personal use. I’d like to take the occasional trip, but we honestly already live somewhere very beautiful and I love the comfort of my own bed and my own food. I still have a travel list, but that is becoming less important.
 

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A few years ago we drove to Boston and camped in a beautiful campground north of the city. We hiked, went on a whale watch, frequently took the train into the city to go to museums, the ocean or just walk around. If we hadn't had small children with us, we would have enjoyed reading, cooking, leisurely browsing book stores, going on bike rides and seeing plays or concerts. The fact that we were there for three weeks really allowed us to do a lot of things without stress or feeling rushed.

Shortly after the trip, DH and I realized that all of our best trips had followed that same format - a home base somewhere that we settled in for an extended period of time that allowed us to really explore an area: the tourist attractions, outdoor activities, historical sites, libraries, architecture, etc.

When DH retires (which could be as early as when youngest enters college or as late as when she graduates), our plan is to sell the house and most of our possessions and buy an RV or fifth wheel. We want to live a life of much less stuff and much more freedom to explore. We want to meander around farmers' markets and visit observatories to see the stars. We want to spend a month enjoying the beach and then pack up and choose where we want to go next. We want the flexibility of traveling to where ever our children or parents are, and the ability to stay near them during a time when they need us without adding stress to the situation by encroaching on their space too much.

It is almost like we are envisioning a whole string of staycations - lots of different things to see and experience, lots of time to walk and explore and sit by the campfire, but very little packing or catching flights or mountains of clothes and gear to clean and put away upon return - and always being able to sleep in our own bed at night.

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I have several things I would like to do. 
Declutter my house

Make and keep my flower beds.  Our home is 50 years old and has several neglected flower beds. 

Time to help people in my congregation  more. And other volunteer work.  

Cook, if not more, better.

exercise, swim regularly. 

And when and if Dh retires we hope to travel a bit…. nothing fancy because we won’t have a lot of money

Grandkids, if possible.  

 

 

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I am 49 and graduated my youngest from homeschool 3 years ago. I got a job teaching engineering and physics in a Catholic high school and just finished my third year there.  I was just selected as the science department chair.   My middle daughter just got married and she and her husband plan to have a baby ASAP.  My youngest lives with us while finishing school but plans to move out in 6-12 months.

My husband is 55.  He plans to work until he can take full social security at 67.  I don't know what I will do.  I think that I will continue teaching at least until he retires. My children are all currently local to me so I can see them on breaks. I am building an engineering program at my school and am very fulfilled by my job.  If I retire when he does, I will have been teaching for 15 years and I will be eligible for a full pension at 20 years, so woking those last five years might just make sense.  I think that if I am having fun I will.

We plan to spend the next 12 years where we are. We are going to travel on my breaks.  I think that when my husband retires I may work another 5 years. we would spend those years building a home on some land in a nearby state and visiting on weekends.  When I retired we would move there full time.

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