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Babysitter wwyd


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2 hours ago, Mrs Tiggywinkle said:

I’ve only talked to her through text and it’s been brief. It is kind of weird.  I don’t expect her to babysit again, which is okay.  My MIL will keep the kids the two nights DH and I work and if I want overtime I’ll find someone else.

It is kind of bizarre the more I think about it, because J has always been very very reliable.

I have no clue about the availability of pharmacy jobs in my area. We aren’t very big and she’s disinclined to move away.  Personally I think she loves to travel and has the money to, and a normal job would interfere with that. I also love to travel and do things with my kids, so I’ve settled into the fact that I’d rather earn less money and have a freer schedule to do things with my kids, so I get it.

Hospital pharmacy jobs can result in some pretty sweet schedules with lots of time off, but it is pretty difficult to get one if you didn’t pursue it from the get go. There’s no issue going the other direction from hospital to retail though.

I can understand your concern with a previously reliable person now only communicating through brief texts, even though she is an adult.

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So…she has completely ghosted me and my mom, who was coordinating her shifts taking care of my grandmother. I texted her sister since I know they have a good relationship and all I got is that “J has not been herself since vacation.”  

I think I’m just going to have to let it go.  I don’t ever loan money to people, but she’s been so reliable for the last year with my grandma and the last few months with me I didn’t mind sending her an advance.

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34 minutes ago, Mrs Tiggywinkle said:

So…she has completely ghosted me and my mom, who was coordinating her shifts taking care of my grandmother. I texted her sister since I know they have a good relationship and all I got is that “J has not been herself since vacation.”  

I think I’m just going to have to let it go.  I don’t ever loan money to people, but she’s been so reliable for the last year with my grandma and the last few months with me I didn’t mind sending her an advance.

That doesn't sound good. Hopefully, she will soon "find herself" again. 

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Glad you reached out, and hopefully with time she will be back to herself, and maybe you guys will be able to reconnect (you know, on a family level). 

lt’s a disappointment that your grandmother has lost her helper and you your babysitter, though!  
 


 

I have to agree with a PP, I wondered about a vacation assault, too.  Yikes.  Probably shouldn’t make wild guesses though, just accept what they tell you re: what’s going on with J, and move on.

Edited by Spryte
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6 minutes ago, Spryte said:

Glad you reached out, and hopefully with time she will be back to herself, and maybe you guys will be able to reconnect (you know, on a family level). 

lt’s a disappointment that your grandmother has lost her helper and you your babysitter, though!  
 


 

I have to agree with a PP, I wondered about a vacation assault, too.  Yikes.  Probably shouldn’t make wild guesses though, just accept what they tell you re: what’s going on with J, and move on.

I totally agree with you about making wild guesses- but when someone suddenly has a big change in behavior, what is the right thing to do?  My bestie lost her 13 year old grandson and after the fact several people said they noticed a big change in him, but nobody reached out. I never know when or how to reach out, since I’m super introverted and would probably NEVER respond to someone trying to help me.  
 

OP, I’m sorry for mentioning it. I’ll delete if you like. 

Edited by Annie G
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54 minutes ago, Annie G said:

I totally agree with you about making wild guesses- but when someone suddenly has a big change in behavior, what is the right thing to do?  My bestie lost her 13 year old grandson and after the fact several people said they noticed a big change in him, but nobody reached out. I never know when or how to reach out, since I’m super introverted and would probably NEVER respond to someone trying to help me.  
 

OP, I’m sorry for mentioning it. I’ll delete if you like. 

Oh, I’m so sorry, what a tragic loss.  That is heartbreaking. 

On the speculation part … I should clarify that I really didn’t mean that OP shouldn’t reach out … and hope it didn’t come across that way.   I was advocating for reaching out to her family earlier in the thread, to be sure she’s ok, based on the sudden change (my oldest is bipolar, and it sounded like his behavior when heading into a depressive phase). I meant more that I, a random internet stranger, should not speculate wildly that J was assaulted while on vacation.  I’m all for reaching out, though, when we are concerned about someone. And in OP’s case, this is a family member, which makes it even more appropriate, I would think, just to be sure she’s safe.

This thread has made me think about our helpers that we have hired for my mom.  They are with us twice weekly, and if they suddenly ghosted … I would be terribly worried, and would want to check to be sure they are safe, no pressure about coming to work.  It was interesting to read that not everyone would do that.  I need to think more about this.
 

Edited by Spryte
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