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How do you cope with a snoring spouse?


mommyoffive
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5 minutes ago, KungFuPanda said:

Wait!  They do sleep studies at home? Why didn't I understand this???

Yes! We were actually in crisis. It sounds silly to people who are like “just kick him” or “poke him” or wear earplugs. But snoring was seriously tearing us apart. In well rested hindsight it sounds extreme but he was exhausted and I was exhausted. Every night was a battle and the anxiety would start hours before bedtime. I finally demanded he have a sleep study. So he calls his doctor and comes home with this apparatus he has to wear and record his sleep. Much to my frustration he proceeded to not snore the night he was wearing it. I was so mad thinking it would show he was fine and there would be no relief. But they looked at the recording and were like “oh yeah. You need a cpap. You have a life threatening level of sleep apnea.” And that was after a “good night” where he hardly snored. Oy. We are on the other side of it now but that was a bad time.

It seems not having to go somewhere to be monitored should help people reluctant to have it done. I imagine I wouldn’t sleep a wink if I had to go somewhere for it. 

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11 hours ago, ktgrok said:

Sleep apnea is tied to heart attacks, etc. It's really important he get checked. 

Otherwise, start kicking him to the couch, if he refuses? Maybe that will convince him

I was sleeping on a pull out couch or a mattress slid under the kids' bed when not in use. 

This is how I convinced dh to get a sleep study done. I had been the one to move so as not to disturb his sleep, but once I started kicking him out of bed and it was inconvenient for him, he got it done.

However, I can't get him to try a CPAP. He says it's noisy and uncomfortable and I won't sleep well if he uses it. He lost some weight, so that helps a bit, and he frequently sleeps in a recliner, which also helps some. But I don't believe they should replace the CPAP.

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15 minutes ago, wilrunner said:

This is how I convinced dh to get a sleep study done. I had been the one to move so as not to disturb his sleep, but once I started kicking him out of bed and it was inconvenient for him, he got it done.

However, I can't get him to try a CPAP. He says it's noisy and uncomfortable and I won't sleep well if he uses it. He lost some weight, so that helps a bit, and he frequently sleeps in a recliner, which also helps some. But I don't believe they should replace the CPAP.

The new CPAPS are whisper quiet.  The static-y “I’m on” sound from my baby monitor is louder than the new CPAP.  A fan is way louder.  They have lots of different face mask options.  

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13 hours ago, teachermom2834 said:

I imagine I wouldn’t sleep a wink if I had to go somewhere for it. 

The first night I spent at the sleep center (about 5 years ago), they weren't able to get enough info to set the machine parameters, so had me come back a second time. I could not sleep. I ended up fuming at the lady who was monitoring me because she was scolding me for not sleeping ("If you don't sleep soon, you might have to come back because they can't get the information they need.") . I told her, "I can't sleep. That's why I'm here!" To her (too late) credit, she did become sympathetic and apologetic before I left.

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3 hours ago, mommyoffive said:

I was going to ask the same question.  I had no idea that snoring was always a sign of sleep apnea.  

Not "always," but there is a significant correlation between snoring and sleep apnea.

Having sleep apnea is a health risk if left untreated and sleep deprivation is very bad for both partners in a relationship.

Best to get it checked out.

Bill

 

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Thanks for this thread.  It has renewed my encouragement to dh to get a sleep study.  It makes me sad that he's so embarrassed that he won't bring it up to the doctor.  I've been asking him for *years*.

I've quoted this thread to him a few times already!

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On 5/11/2021 at 10:08 AM, Spy Car said:

Have the spouse checked by a sleep doctor for potential (not unlikely) sleep apnea.

A partner with sleep apnea who uses a CPAP machine (or variants) will no longer snore and everyone will get more sleep.

Something to rule out IMO.

Bill

 

 

Agreed. This is what solved our issue.

Before that... I'd roll him over when he snored until he was in a position with no snore long enough for me to fall asleep

ETA: He was reluctant to do the sleep study but his oxygen levels were so low when he finally did it they didn't even complete the first night but started fitting him with a CPAP right away.  His FIRST night with the CPAP was so good he became a immediate believer.

 

Edited by vonfirmath
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On 5/11/2021 at 11:31 AM, ktgrok said:

Pretty sure that is what he has. What happens is he wakes up sort of in the wee hours, thinks it is time to get up, takes it off, decides he will get up in "just a minute" then falls back asleep. Generally if he starts snoring I'll hear and tell him to put it back on. 

DH told his regular doctor, who gave him a referral to a sleep study place, who talked to his insurance and arranged for home sleep study. 

I really really sleep better by myself....but DH takes it so personally. But he likes to cuddle and touch me during the night and that wakes me up and I hate it. My idea of "cuddling" is to be back to back, with a few inches of back or butt touching, or I'm on my back and my arm is barely touching his back or arm. That's it. The way a dog might lay down next to you, touching you, but not ON you or wrapped around you or petting you. His idea is more wound together, stroking and snuggling. I'm like, that's fine for "adult time" but this is sleepy time - stop touching me!

I would love to have a house with those old his and hers adjoining  bedrooms!

This is how my husband and I sleep. I've always felt a bit guilty about it because my parents slept all cuddled together but we just don't.

 

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Separate rooms...even on separate floors of the house.  Earplugs didn't help much, plus the most effective ones were uncomfortable. White noise machine only annoyed Mr. Snores. Also, I need to get up and pee at least once a night, yet doing so would wake Mr. Snores, who also has insomnia and would, when woke, be awake for HOURS.  I'd lie in bed, needing to go pee, waiting to be sure HE was in a deep sleep before I tried to carefully get out of bed.   Same if I needed to roll over or change position - odds are it would wake him up. Many nights I'd take my pillow and go downstairs and sleep semi-upright in a living room chair, which was still better than dealing with a insomniac snorer.  Once a kid moved out I nabbed her bedroom.  Both my sets of grandparents has separate bedrooms when I was small - now I know why!

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17 hours ago, elroisees said:

His sense of humor returned! Before, he was so depressed he was talking to our pastor about it, but two weeks after he started sleeping well, his perspective on life was drastically improved. 

Yes, this! When I don't sleep well, I feel so down. Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually depressed, and then I remember that I haven't been sleeping well. All is better once I finally sleep. Dealing with poor sleep all the time would be so terrible, and I feel for anyone going through it. 

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At this point in my life, I wake myself up snoring!  LOL  My first husband snored soooo bad but back then I could and did sleep through anything.  I remember one time we were camping and he fell asleep at the campside....I was already in the camper.  I woke up to his brothers yelling, 'Get up and go get in bed with Scarlett!'  His snoring was driving them insane.

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1 hour ago, JFSinIL said:

Separate rooms...even on separate floors of the house.  Earplugs didn't help much, plus the most effective ones were uncomfortable. White noise machine only annoyed Mr. Snores. Also, I need to get up and pee at least once a night, yet doing so would wake Mr. Snores, who also has insomnia and would, when woke, be awake for HOURS.  I'd lie in bed, needing to go pee, waiting to be sure HE was in a deep sleep before I tried to carefully get out of bed.   Same if I needed to roll over or change position - odds are it would wake him up. Many nights I'd take my pillow and go downstairs and sleep semi-upright in a living room chair, which was still better than dealing with a insomniac snorer.  Once a kid moved out I nabbed her bedroom.  Both my sets of grandparents has separate bedrooms when I was small - now I know why!

Yes! I will soon have an empty bedroom in my house. I cant wait! I finally discovered ear plugs that work so snoring is not a huge problem anymore. He decided to start shaking the bed all night long with his restless legs.  Separate bedrooms can be positive fora relationship.

 

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25 minutes ago, AbcdeDooDah said:

Yes! I will soon have an empty bedroom in my house. I cant wait! I finally discovered ear plugs that work so snoring is not a huge problem anymore. He decided to start shaking the bed all night long with his restless legs.  Separate bedrooms can be positive fora relationship.

 

OMG I'm cruising all the "can't sleep" and mattress threads because of dh's restless-leg-bed-shaking! I was starting to think I was the only one with the problem.  Thank you for mentioning it! 

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6 hours ago, Scarlett said:

I am curious if anyone has ever had a sleep study done where a Cpap was not recommended?

 

Not quite the same, but when I had my sleep study done, the options were for CPAP, a dental appliance, or surgery. I chose the dental appliance. It really didn't help because my main problem is insomnia, not sleep apnea. 

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Ducking in to say that I was able to buy a travel CPAP online, without any medical exams.

I use it when my dh and I need to sleep in the same room.
Totally agreeing with the concept that "I can't snore that loudly" . . . and yet it was terrible for him.
I'm grateful we were able to find a good solution.

ETA:  Another reason I could hardly believe I snored was that I didn't have any of the usual snoring traits.

 

Edited by Beth S
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Short-ish answer: I finally insisted he go for a sleep study. As I suspected he was dx'd with sleep apnea and given a CPAP. He hated it and chose to go on a diet instead. Since he lost a significant amount of weight his snoring stopped. I realize this is not an option for everyone since not everyone's snoring is caused by a weight issue.

Longer answer: Of course he would fall asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow and start snoring shortly after, leaving me unable to sleep. I put up with it for over 10 years before finally telling him I was done. He could get a sleep study or sleep in another room in the house. Until then I didn't get enough sleep (add a baby-toddler with as yet undiagnosed ADHD and I REALLY didn't get enough sleep). I would get up and do things until I was so tired even his snoring wouldn't keep me awake. I tried wearing ear buds and listening to quiet music. I tried various types of ear plugs, none of which were powerful enough to overcome the sound of snoring. I put my pillow over my head in imitation of a cartoon character trying to block out sound with a pillow. I jabbed him in the side with my elbow, in the head with my hand, kicked at his legs and feet. Woke him up and told him to roll over (it was worse when he was on his back). He would just start snoring again after a few minutes.

I don't recommend doing my longer answer stuff. Suggest strongly he see a doctor. Most of the time snoring can be treated, whether it's allergy/sinus related, sleep apnea related, or some other medical issue. 

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I have restless legs, DH has terrible sleep apnea.  He has had 2 surgeries (but NOT the one that was recommended both times!!!)  He has a brand new c-pap sitting in the box by his bed.  I doubt he will ever use it.

I sleep upstairs in my own room.  I really really miss sleeping in same bed as DH-- but I'm a MUCH better person when I get sleep!   I do keep my clothes and such in the master-- I think it would totally crush DH if I completely moved out.  I've had my own room for the past 20 years.

Last weekend DH and I got away to the beach-- we had a 1 bed condo.  DH slept on a pull out.  I still needed a white noise (fan) and I felt sorry for any neighbors-- he is that loud!

FIL snored so loudly that his wife lost 90% of her hearing!  She refused to sleep on couch or in one of their many available guest rooms... She has since passed and he has remarried.  His current wife insisted on a c-pap (other wife tried for YEARS but failed).  FIL now uses it faithfully and is a firm believer (better sleep, better memory...).  He nags DH for me.  He also has some heart issues that the Dr said was linked to the apnea...

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1 hour ago, Scarlett said:

Glad to hear this. I half suspected it was a big scam.lol

My husband could tell the difference with the sleep he got with the first night with the CPAP.

He was always the one of us who woke up with every kid sound. I was too deep a sleeper. Now we know it was partly because he was too light of a sleeper. He's a much deeper sleeper with the CPAP and does NOT wake up with every sound anymore.

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1 hour ago, Scarlett said:

Glad to hear this. I half suspected it was a big scam.lol

It may be a scam for some, but if mine was a scam, it was one that sure has made a positive difference for me. Of course, I wish I didn't have to sleep with the machine. The mask still bugs me. But the sleep is wonderful.

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On 5/11/2021 at 11:11 AM, mommyoffive said:

No sleep study done.  Not sure how successful I would be in convincing that to be done. 

I could not get my husband to do a sleep study. But, if you can, do convince him. Apnea really does affect health dramatically. 

I was diagnosed with moderate sleep apnea 15? years ago and fitted with a mouth device from a sleep medicine dentist. It fixed my apnea in a follow up study. Eventually it broke and my sleep medicine dentist had retired. I began using Snore Rx, which works just as well for me I believe. 

Finally my husband agreed to wear a snore rx mouth piece himself. (I got to the point where I was no longer willing to sleep together). It has made a huge difference in his (and my) sleep--in both snoring and restful sleep (no more tossing around, light sleep--he's just still). 

 

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10 hours ago, Scarlett said:

Glad to hear this. I half suspected it was a big scam.lol

I think it is more that anyone desperate enough to do a sleep study likely has really bad symptoms. So it makes sense almost all would have apna. Snoring and obstructive apnea are caused by the same things usually, so if you have snoring badly enough to seek medical care, you probably have apnea too. 

9 hours ago, vonfirmath said:

My husband could tell the difference with the sleep he got with the first night with the CPAP.

He was always the one of us who woke up with every kid sound. I was too deep a sleeper. Now we know it was partly because he was too light of a sleeper. He's a much deeper sleeper with the CPAP and does NOT wake up with every sound anymore.

Yes, after a few nights DH said, "this is like cheating - is this how people without apnea feel all the time?!"

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On 5/12/2021 at 5:18 PM, Twigs said:

Not quite the same, but when I had my sleep study done, the options were for CPAP, a dental appliance, or surgery. I chose the dental appliance. It really didn't help because my main problem is insomnia, not sleep apnea. 

So when a sleep study is done,do you take your sleeping pill or not take it,I have severe insomnia,I take Ambien× 5 yrs,it's not working anymore and he says there is nothing stronger.sorry that was like 2 questions.

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6 hours ago, Layla said:

So when a sleep study is done,do you take your sleeping pill or not take it,I have severe insomnia,I take Ambien× 5 yrs,it's not working anymore and he says there is nothing stronger.sorry that was like 2 questions.

I would ask the sleep doctor for the correct answer.

Since I knew my problem was I don't fall asleep, I did not take my sleeping pill. That night, it was 3 hours before my apnea showed up.

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On 5/12/2021 at 4:18 PM, Scarlett said:

I am curious if anyone has ever had a sleep study done where a Cpap was not recommended?

 

Yes, me.  I snored, had a sleep study at home, did not have apnea.  Turns out I had a severely deviated septum.  Getting that repaired was a huge game changer for me across the board.  Better sleep, no longer a mouth breather, seasonal allergies dropped from maybe a 5-6 in severity to a 0-1.  And sinus infections dropped from 2-3 a year requiring abx to 0 since surgery a few years ago.  

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24 minutes ago, Monica_in_Switzerland said:

Yes, me.  I snored, had a sleep study at home, did not have apnea.  Turns out I had a severely deviated septum.  Getting that repaired was a huge game changer for me across the board.  Better sleep, no longer a mouth breather, seasonal allergies dropped from maybe a 5-6 in severity to a 0-1.  And sinus infections dropped from 2-3 a year requiring abx to 0 since surgery a few years ago.  

This is interesting....I just finished up a ct scan and a couple of visits with ent doc.  I have a deviated septum and I snore and I am a mouth breather main reason I went to see the ent doc was because of constant sinus issues.  We have decided against surgery for now, but I am going to keep this in mind.

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On 5/12/2021 at 6:24 PM, Scarlett said:

Glad to hear this. I half suspected it was a big scam.lol

Sleep studies, even less advanced home studies that don't capture brain waves, are definitely not a "scam."

I think you would be amazed at the amount of data that even a basic CPAP machine is able to capture on a breath by breath basis. Not everyone who snores has sleep apnea, there are other causes, but there is a strong correlation.

If it is not sleep apnea, it is good to know as it helps isolate what's causing the issue.

Bill

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1 hour ago, Monica_in_Switzerland said:

Yes, me.  I snored, had a sleep study at home, did not have apnea.  Turns out I had a severely deviated septum.  Getting that repaired was a huge game changer for me across the board.  Better sleep, no longer a mouth breather, seasonal allergies dropped from maybe a 5-6 in severity to a 0-1.  And sinus infections dropped from 2-3 a year requiring abx to 0 since surgery a few years ago.  

This could be the case here.  

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On 5/12/2021 at 10:06 AM, stephanier.1765 said:

We sleep in different rooms at different ends of the house. He won't do a sleep study nor bring the problem up with his doctor. I have even been known to sleep in the bathtub when on vacation because that's how bad the snoring situation is.

 

On 5/12/2021 at 11:53 AM, happi duck said:

Thanks for this thread.  It has renewed my encouragement to dh to get a sleep study.  It makes me sad that he's so embarrassed that he won't bring it up to the doctor.  I've been asking him for *years*.

I've quoted this thread to him a few times already!

I called and made DH's doctor appointment for him and went in with him. He was not adverse to going, but I was afraid he would downplay it - which he did a bit. So, I did most of the talking about what *I* experience and observe when he is asleep. Doc picked up the phone and had his front staff refer him to the sleep clinic while we were still in the room.
 

DH gets his at home sleep study equipment on the 25th.

On 5/12/2021 at 8:28 PM, vonfirmath said:

My husband could tell the difference with the sleep he got with the first night with the CPAP.

He was always the one of us who woke up with every kid sound. I was too deep a sleeper. Now we know it was partly because he was too light of a sleeper. He's a much deeper sleeper with the CPAP and does NOT wake up with every sound anymore.

This is us. I'm too deep, he's too light and is very sleep deprived because of it.  

It's bad that I hope he does have apnea, but if it's not that and a CPAP won't help him, I might just cry because then what? What else could the solution be? 
(I'm not asking you.)

DH and I were discussing a couple days ago that we have never hoped for a health problem to be true before. But he is hoping for a diagnosis of apnea too, because, at least it gets us on a path of treatment for his sleep deprivation.

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9 minutes ago, fraidycat said:

 

I called and made DH's doctor appointment for him and went in with him. He was not adverse to going, but I was afraid he would downplay it - which he did a bit. So, I did most of the talking about what *I* experience and observe when he is asleep. Doc picked up the phone and had his front staff refer him to the sleep clinic while we were still in the room.
 

DH gets his at home sleep study equipment on the 25th.

This is us. I'm too deep, he's too light and is very sleep deprived because of it.  

It's bad that I hope he does have apnea, but if it's not that and a CPAP won't help him, I might just cry because then what? What else could the solution be? 
(I'm not asking you.)

DH and I were discussing a couple days ago that we have never hoped for a health problem to be true before. But he is hoping for a diagnosis of apnea too, because, at least it gets us on a path of treatment for his sleep deprivation.

Wishing you the best.

If it is sleep apnea and your husband is prescribed a CPAP that is set up "wide open" (4/20) and the sleep doctor is not going to actively monitor his data to titrate the best settings (which is typically not the care most people get), do consider directing him to the "Apnea Board" forum I mentioned earlier where he could get free support to maximize his comfort and therapy.

Finding the right mask is one of the other major issues for success. Most DMEs have a window where one can swap out masks, so be aware of time constraints.  

Good on you for being pro-active!

Bill

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9 minutes ago, Spy Car said:

Wishing you the best.

If it is sleep apnea and your husband is prescribed a CPAP that is set up "wide open" (4/20) and the sleep doctor is not going to actively monitor his data to titrate the best settings (which is typically not the care most people get), do consider directing him to the "Apnea Board" forum I mentioned earlier where he could get free support to maximize his comfort and therapy.

Finding the right mask is one of the other major issues for success. Most DMEs have a window where one can swap out masks, so be aware of time constraints.  

Good on you for being pro-active!

Bill

Thank you for the tips. I did mention that you had recommended the Apnea Board for help with settings just yesterday so he is aware that there may be some adjustment period if (when 🤞🏼) he gets a CPAP.

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Just now, fraidycat said:

Thank you for the tips. I did mention that you had recommended the Apnea Board for help with settings just yesterday so he is aware that there may be some adjustment period if (when 🤞🏼) he gets a CPAP.

Great!

Also, if your husband has simple obstructive apnea and you have a choice of machines (you should) most people prefer the ResMed AirSense 10 AutoSet machine over the competing Philips DreamStation devices. Some DMEs push one choice for their own economic benefit. The Autoset allows both "auto" modes and fixed pressures. These are the ones one wants. All brands have models that lack features. Don't get stuck with sub-optimal device. DMEs can be sketchy.

Also make sure a device--if prescribed-- comes with an internal SD card, or purchase a small capacity SD card yourself to capture the machine data. One needs to capture data to make sound tweeks to the machine settings. Not trying to get ahead of ourselves here, but I'll forget otherwise.

Bill

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On 5/12/2021 at 7:18 AM, Scarlett said:

I am curious if anyone has ever had a sleep study done where a Cpap was not recommended?

 

DH did sleep study, did not have sleep apnea. I don't remember if anything was actually recommended, it was more, "Nope, not sleep apnea.✌️

I sleep on the couch now, lol. 

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My husband's snoring varies depending from very light to really heavy if he had a late night snack or whether he had Jim Beam or Glenfiddich. Surprisingly I just realized the more expensive scotch doesn't cause him to snore as much as the Jim Beam.  🙃   I just nudge him and tell him to move over on his side and then we both go back to sleep.  He walks 10 to 20K a day depending on how much time he has during the day.  I snore a bit myself depending on allergies so we just deal with it.    Neither of us feels the need to do a sleep study.  On occasion I have ended up on the couch for a couple hours when the side nudge didn't work. 

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2 hours ago, Spy Car said:

Great!

Also, if your husband has simple obstructive apnea and you have a choice of machines (you should) most people prefer the ResMed AirSense 10 AutoSet machine over the competing Philips DreamStation devices. Some DMEs push one choice for their own economic benefit. The Autoset allows both "auto" modes and fixed pressures. These are the ones one wants. All brands have models that lack features. Don't get stuck with sub-optimal device. DMEs can be sketchy.

Also make sure a device--if prescribed-- comes with an internal SD card, or purchase a small capacity SD card yourself to capture the machine data. One needs to capture data to make sound tweeks to the machine settings. Not trying to get ahead of ourselves here, but I'll forget otherwise.

Bill

I didn't have a choice of machines, but I also didn't really know what all to ask. I have the Philips. After I was assigned the machine, they referred me to a pulmonologist who managed the settings, etc. At first mine was a range that went too high, and I had the weird mouth puffing up and too full, etc. He then adjusted it to go from 7 to 12. Most of the time I land an average of 9 or a little over. The pulmonologist monitored me every few months after the initial visits; the machine has an SD card that records a lot of information on it, and you just take the card with you to the appointment, and they download the info. Then we moved, and I don't have a pulmonologist here. Every morning I check the info, and it is pretty steady unless I take a med or have a cold or something. If I were to start having issues again, I would find a pulmonologist here, but I see no need to unless that happens. I can find the medical supplies that need to be replaced on Amazon without a prescription (and they cost me less than they did with my former insurance, as well as being able to put them on our HSA). One day, my machine will die, and I will have to do something then. Until then, I'm fine as is. But the initial appointments were helpful.

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8 minutes ago, Jaybee said:

I didn't have a choice of machines, but I also didn't really know what all to ask. I have the Philips. After I was assigned the machine, they referred me to a pulmonologist who managed the settings, etc. At first mine was a range that went too high, and I had the weird mouth puffing up and too full, etc. He then adjusted it to go from 7 to 12. Most of the time I land an average of 9 or a little over. The pulmonologist monitored me every few months after the initial visits; the machine has an SD card that records a lot of information on it, and you just take the card with you to the appointment, and they download the info. Then we moved, and I don't have a pulmonologist here. Every morning I check the info, and it is pretty steady unless I take a med or have a cold or something. If I were to start having issues again, I would find a pulmonologist here, but I see no need to unless that happens. I can find the medical supplies that need to be replaced on Amazon without a prescription (and they cost me less than they did with my former insurance, as well as being able to put them on our HSA). One day, my machine will die, and I will have to do something then. Until then, I'm fine as is. But the initial appointments were helpful.

If you have (or had) a physician who monitored your data (from the SD card) you are (were) very fortunate. Most people don't seem to get that.

At best, most sleep clinics/sleep doctors look at the minimal compliance data that sent to them wirelessly that tracks whether a patient uses the device (or not) and if apneas are within an "acceptable" range and custom titrations are rare.

Machines on full auto can cause patient discomfort and less than optimal therapy (as with your original settings) and it never gets fixed. Part of why so many people seem to quit, IMO. I believe the failure rate of people sticking with CPAP is about 50%.

Bill

 

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14 minutes ago, Spy Car said:

If you have (or had) a physician who monitored your data (from the SD card) you are (were) very fortunate. Most people don't seem to get that.

At best, most sleep clinics/sleep doctors look at the minimal compliance data that sent to them wirelessly that tracks whether a patient uses the device (or not) and if apneas are within an "acceptable" range and custom titrations are rare.

Machines on full auto can cause patient discomfort and less than optimal therapy (as with your original settings) and it never gets fixed. Part of why so many people seem to quit, IMO. I believe the failure rate of people sticking with CPAP is about 50%.

Bill

 

Wow. I think my insurance wouldn't pay for the equipment if I were not under a pulmonologist. (I have different insurance now, so I don't remember the details.) And yes, full auto would have had me gulping and sputtering and miserable.

ETA: Now, if I were not having trouble but my machine wore out, I could do the settings myself because I know the range that is working well for me. But I think it is important to have some help at the first.

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Just now, Jaybee said:

Wow. I think my insurance wouldn't pay for the equipment if I were not under a pulmonologist. (I have different insurance now, so I don't remember the details.) And yes, full auto would have had me gulping and sputtering and miserable.

The insurance will require some sort of specialist to prescribe the devices. They also require reviews of "compliance" data to make sure patients meet a minimum of usage (or they will cut off supplies and deny new machines). But very many people get machines set to "full auto" and that's it. Therefore many people feel miserable with their Cpap machines, don't realize that's not the way is should be, and quit.

Which is why people formed the Apnea Board. There are expert-users there who are excellent at analyzing the data and tweaking the settings to help get people treatment that's both comfortable for them and effective. It is an amazing resource for CPAP users. Full auto is almost never the optimal setting from a patient's perspective.

Bill

 

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I will also comment as to another reason a lot of people probably don't want a CPAP machine. Okay, so this is pretty personal, and from a woman's perspective. I felt a bit humiliated. If it were not for my cousin's encouragement from the very beginning, I probably wouldn't have stuck with it. I was embarrassed to be wearing that mask with hose when we went to bed, because it made me feel so ugly, unattractive, and unfeminine--and breathing like a quiet Darth Vader (on the other side if it, of course, is how lovely snoring is, if I didn't have the machine). There is insecurity anyway, due to weight, so this was/is one more thing. That was no small thing to overcome, and is still probably the thing that evokes the strongest feelings from me. It doesn't seem to bother dh, but it does bother me. From the man's perspective, I don't know what those insecurities would entail besides the bother of getting used to it, but I would imagine there are some similar type feelings that go on.

But to sleep...ah, it feels sooo good! So I keep using it.

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