WildflowerMom Posted May 11, 2021 Share Posted May 11, 2021 If you have a loved one with mental illness, did NAMI meetings help? Do you think therapy is a better choice? I am struggling horribly right now. Thanks for any advice. 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted May 11, 2021 Share Posted May 11, 2021 I’ve never been to a nami meeting but therapy was a huge help for me. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pinball Posted May 11, 2021 Share Posted May 11, 2021 I’m really sorry you are going through this. id say both, if you can swing it. But if you only have the emotional energy for one...ask yourself what would help you more? Being able to talk to someone about your specific issue and hopefully get directed, specific advice or help with an action plan (for yourself, not your loved one) or hearing and listening to others who are in similar situations to yours and hearing how they managed, what helped them, etc It is a very difficult situation, and sometimes you only have the energy to do so much, if that makes sense. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pinball Posted May 11, 2021 Share Posted May 11, 2021 This page has a pdf of a very general book that NAMI produced: description: The NAMI Family & Friends companion eBook provides important information about mental health conditions including: conditions and diagnoses, treatment and recovery, crisis planning, resources and more. You can download it for free in multiple languges below: https://www.nami.org/Support-Education/NAMI-Programs/NAMI-Family-Friends 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildflowerMom Posted May 11, 2021 Author Share Posted May 11, 2021 3 hours ago, pinball said: I’m really sorry you are going through this. id say both, if you can swing it. But if you only have the emotional energy for one...ask yourself what would help you more? Being able to talk to someone about your specific issue and hopefully get directed, specific advice or help with an action plan (for yourself, not your loved one) or hearing and listening to others who are in similar situations to yours and hearing how they managed, what helped them, etc It is a very difficult situation, and sometimes you only have the energy to do so much, if that makes sense. That makes a boat-load of sense, especially today. I am in a bad place right now, just drowning. Looking into the ebook suggestion. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Innisfree Posted May 11, 2021 Share Posted May 11, 2021 No advice, but lots of hugs. I hope you find something helpful. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KSera Posted May 11, 2021 Share Posted May 11, 2021 2 minutes ago, WildflowerMom said: That makes a boat-load of sense, especially today. I am in a bad place right now, just drowning. Looking into the ebook suggestion. I’m so sorry. Does your loved one need a higher level of care? Many programs at a higher level of care than outpatient also have a wraparound family support component. (I realize it’s possible that your loved one is already hospitalized, but it does seem like residential and partial hospitalization programs frequently have more of a family component than full on inpatient.) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildflowerMom Posted May 11, 2021 Author Share Posted May 11, 2021 32 minutes ago, KSera said: I’m so sorry. Does your loved one need a higher level of care? Many programs at a higher level of care than outpatient also have a wraparound family support component. (I realize it’s possible that your loved one is already hospitalized, but it does seem like residential and partial hospitalization programs frequently have more of a family component than full on inpatient.) He is in denial right now about how bad it is. Waiting on getting in to see a new psych, which thankfully he is on board with. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildflowerMom Posted May 11, 2021 Author Share Posted May 11, 2021 Does anyone know of an online support group? I am not on FB. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ditto Posted May 11, 2021 Share Posted May 11, 2021 I just want to let you know that I am very sorry for how much you are struggling right now and to offer you lots of hugs and support. PS--I'm not on FB either. I hope that others are able to provide you with online support groups. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pinball Posted May 11, 2021 Share Posted May 11, 2021 43 minutes ago, WildflowerMom said: Does anyone know of an online support group? I am not on FB. Depending on the area, NAMI meetings might still be thru Zoom. they have a number for support 1 800 950 NAMI (6264) https://www.nami.org/help 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildflowerMom Posted May 11, 2021 Author Share Posted May 11, 2021 1 hour ago, Ditto said: I just want to let you know that I am very sorry for how much you are struggling right now and to offer you lots of hugs and support. PS--I'm not on FB either. I hope that others are able to provide you with online support groups. Thank you, D and everyone else. Big hugs to anyone who's dealing with this or who's dealt with it. I actually left the mental health group here for parents because it was bringing back ptsd symptoms. Now... I'm back in the midst of it again. I just want to run away or cry my eyes out, but I'm trying to hold it together. Support and hugs for everyone in the same boat. Love to you all. I really mean that. 💛💛💛 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildflowerMom Posted May 11, 2021 Author Share Posted May 11, 2021 37 minutes ago, pinball said: Depending on the area, NAMI meetings might still be thru Zoom. they have a number for support 1 800 950 NAMI (6264) https://www.nami.org/help Thanks for this. I didn't see that when I was in the site while ago. I'll call today. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ditto Posted May 11, 2021 Share Posted May 11, 2021 4 hours ago, WildflowerMom said: Thanks for this. I didn't see that when I was in the site while ago. I'll call today. I hope they can help you. (((hugs))) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildflowerMom Posted May 11, 2021 Author Share Posted May 11, 2021 28 minutes ago, Ditto said: I hope they can help you. (((hugs))) Ill call tomorrow. Today ended on a rough note. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa Louise Posted May 12, 2021 Share Posted May 12, 2021 I'm so sorry you're struggling. It's do hard. Therapy, if accessible. Support groups don't work well for me but might for you. Therapy, though, is a space where you can really centre your own experiences and challenges. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildflowerMom Posted May 12, 2021 Author Share Posted May 12, 2021 I'll see what I can find this afternoon after I'm back from an appt. I feel a little better today. Went on a crying jag yesterday. Talked to him and ended up crying like I don't know what. Not at all what I wanted to do. I don't want him to avoid telling me things, so I texted him last night to explain that I just broke for a minute and I still want to hear everything and have him be honest with me; I can handle it; yada yada yada. Really hard to carry the burdens of your loved one with mental and physical health issues and also have mental and physical health issues of your own. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pinball Posted May 12, 2021 Share Posted May 12, 2021 I’m so so sorry. It is hard NOT to cry sometimes, despite our best intentions. it sounds like you did good, though, with the texts afterwards 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted May 12, 2021 Share Posted May 12, 2021 I’m so sorry things are so bad right now, wildflower mom. I don’t have any advice for you, but I wanted to send you some hugs. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drama Llama Posted May 12, 2021 Share Posted May 12, 2021 My understanding is that NAMI has two different things for family members. One is the Family to Family class, which is a structured class that teaches people how to navigate supporting their family members with mental illness. In the past, it's been in person, and so there are opportunities to discuss things that are specific to your area, like which ER is best, what words might you use in a 911 call to get them to send someone with specific training, how to navigate Voc Rehab or Medicaid for your particular state. At the class, you'll also meet other people with similar struggles, which can make you feel less alone, but it's not a support group. The other is their Family Support Group, which is like group therapy. I think that if you have time to only do one thing, you need to ask yourself whether you're having the most trouble navigating the system to get help, in which case Family to Family would be best, or whether you're having the most trouble navigating the relationship with your loved one or regulating your own emotional response, in which case therapy makes most sense. If you have time to do both, you can just do that. Then if you decide that therapy is what you need, I'd ask whether you think you'll do better 1:1 or in a group, whether you can afford the co-pay or should go with NAMI since it's free, and which works with your schedule. I'm sorry you're in this situation. 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted May 12, 2021 Share Posted May 12, 2021 4 hours ago, WildflowerMom said: Really hard to carry the burdens of your loved one with mental and physical health issues and also have mental and physical health issues of your own. I feel so bad about what I have put my hubby through. Not abuse or whatever, but significant depression, C-PTSD, anxiety, mood swings, etc. I get so upset that he has had to cope with a marriage to such a broken person. I know he has suffered at times also. He has had his own moments. It sounds like your situation may be just opposite of ours. I do appreciate that we've had some good times, done some amazing things, and have an awesome hope for the future. I lean on those things when times are bad and I know he does also. We've made it through 100% of our tough days for 28 years. We got this. And so do y'all. To answer your original question? I've done hospitalization, intensive outpatient, therapy, medication. I think you do whatever it takes! No shame in any of it. It'll help. Both of you probably need to do individual things (the level of therapies each of you need) and possibly couple's therapy or groups. I know nothing about NAMI groups so I cannot comment on them. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildflowerMom Posted May 12, 2021 Author Share Posted May 12, 2021 1 hour ago, Pamela H in Texas said: I feel so bad about what I have put my hubby through. Not abuse or whatever, but significant depression, C-PTSD, anxiety, mood swings, etc. I get so upset that he has had to cope with a marriage to such a broken person. I know he has suffered at times also. He has had his own moments. It sounds like your situation may be just opposite of ours. I do appreciate that we've had some good times, done some amazing things, and have an awesome hope for the future. I lean on those things when times are bad and I know he does also. We've made it through 100% of our tough days for 28 years. We got this. And so do y'all. To answer your original question? I've done hospitalization, intensive outpatient, therapy, medication. I think you do whatever it takes! No shame in any of it. It'll help. Both of you probably need to do individual things (the level of therapies each of you need) and possibly couple's therapy or groups. I know nothing about NAMI groups so I cannot comment on them. Thank you for this, Pamela. In my case, it's my son, but this is helpful, regardless. I hope you are doing better now! 💛💛💛 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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