hjffkj Posted April 27, 2021 Share Posted April 27, 2021 I just wanted to start a thread about those little things that you do for your spouse or they do for you that are just little things that screams "I love you and I'm thinking of you" during the chaos of your lives. I don't know why. A little bit of feeling really appreciated right now and wanting to just have a feel good thread but also I'm sure I could get some more ideas. I think the once dh and I do for each other is most often, specifically during the pandemic has been bringing home a coffee every now and then when we had to be out for something else. Anyone care to share 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kareni Posted April 27, 2021 Share Posted April 27, 2021 My husband packs lunch once a week. I've been enclosing a short note and a piece of chocolate to brighten his day. When he used to travel on business, I'd include what we came to call sock notes, a note hidden inside each pair of socks, so that he'd find a note each morning. Regards, Kareni 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kassia Posted April 27, 2021 Share Posted April 27, 2021 DH does so many things for me each day that I can't even list them all. He treats me like a princess from the time he gets up until he goes to bed at night and I don't deserve it, but I sure do appreciate it. I do things for him too, but not nearly as much as he does for me. @Karenilove the sock notes! 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hjffkj Posted April 27, 2021 Author Share Posted April 27, 2021 15 minutes ago, Kassia said: DH does so many things for me each day that I can't even list them all. He treats me like a princess from the time he gets up until he goes to bed at night and I don't deserve it, but I sure do appreciate it. I do things for him too, but not nearly as much as he does for me. @Karenilove the sock notes! This is how my dh treats me. He does so many things for me and yet somehow still surprises me with new little things regularly. I also do things for him but it certainly seems uneven from my perspective. He doesn't see that though😀 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted April 27, 2021 Share Posted April 27, 2021 18 minutes ago, Kassia said: DH does so many things for me each day that I can't even list them all. He treats me like a princess from the time he gets up until he goes to bed at night and I don't deserve it, but I sure do appreciate it. I do things for him too, but not nearly as much as he does for me. @Karenilove the sock notes! Me too. I try to think of things to do for him but I feel inadequate compared to what all he does for me. I make the coffee every morning..,,(well I set it to be made every morning) and I take him coffee in bed. Almost 100% of the time. If I am cleaning the kitchen he runs me out when I get to the pots and pans and he does those. If I make myself a travel mug and forget to take it with me he brings it to my office on his way to work. This morning he brought me a baggie full of some yummy kettle corn we bought over the weekend. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted April 27, 2021 Share Posted April 27, 2021 11 minutes ago, hjffkj said: This is how my dh treats me. He does so many things for me and yet somehow still surprises me with new little things regularly. I also do things for him but it certainly seems uneven from my perspective. He doesn't see that though😀 Ha we were texting the same thing at the same time. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hjffkj Posted April 27, 2021 Author Share Posted April 27, 2021 One thing I've started to do on Mondays when I'm sitting at my dd's dance school and I know he has come downstairs for lunch, time we usually spend outside playing with the kids, I'll just send him a loving text. nothing to start a convo because I'd rather him spend his lunch break with the kids that are at home but something to let him know I'm thinking of him. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amethyst Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 We give each other attention. Tea in the morning before work for half an hour, talking with each other. And then tea time again after dinner, just us, sipping and talking. It’s huge and so glad we have always done this. Real talk, every day. Also, touch. Frequent touch. Random touches. This is really one of my husband’s love languages. A hug, a pat on the shoulder, a playful swat on his rear, sitting right up next to him on the sofa...this all relays a sense of physical intimacy. It’s not always a prelude to something even more physical, but it connects us. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hjffkj Posted April 28, 2021 Author Share Posted April 28, 2021 25 minutes ago, Amethyst said: We give each other attention. Tea in the morning before work for half an hour, talking with each other. And then tea time again after dinner, just us, sipping and talking. It’s huge and so glad we have always done this. Real talk, every day. Also, touch. Frequent touch. Random touches. This is really one of my husband’s love languages. A hug, a pat on the shoulder, a playful swat on his rear, sitting right up next to him on the sofa...this all relays a sense of physical intimacy. It’s not always a prelude to something even more physical, but it connects us. touch is a HUGE thing in our marriage. Exactly how you describe it too. Also random glances. Like if we are in a group of people and I'm talking to a few and he's on the other side of the room talking to other people we'll shoot a quick loving look at one another and then just continue being present in our individual convos. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 We do a lot of touch too. It is very important to dh especially I think. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaybee Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 Dh is better at this than I am. Although I did make a pitcher of iced tea for dinner. 😄 He often fills the car's gas tank when he drives it, even if it isn't real low yet. He gives me a call from work in the middle of the afternoon lots of days. We started going out to lunch on Wednesdays. We are always sharing with each other the things we have read or listened to; that connection on the intellectual level brings us closer and makes our relationship stay fresh and interesting. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kassia Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 We are all so fortunate to have such wonderful husbands! ❤️ This is why I never want or expect anything from DH on holidays. I feel like what he does for me every day of the year is better than any gift he could give me. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 Dh retired almost two years ago and once he did he realized how much I do every day. He paid attention to tasks I do and has taken some over without me asking. so now every morning he gets up way earlier than I do and puts his earbuds in and works while listening to a podcast. Every day he empties the dishwasher, washes up any dishes we dirtied after the kitchen was cleaned from dinner, sweeps the downstairs, washes and refills my water bottle, and a few other tasks. I get to sleep a little later and wake up to a house that is cleaner than when I went to bed. It’s the little things- he folds the lap quilt I use every evening, and puts my current book at the table so I can read during breakfast...that show me that he’s paying attention to things that can make my day a little nicer. 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hjffkj Posted April 28, 2021 Author Share Posted April 28, 2021 9 minutes ago, Annie G said: Dh retired almost two years ago and once he did he realized how much I do every day. He paid attention to tasks I do and has taken some over without me asking. so now every morning he gets up way earlier than I do and puts his earbuds in and works while listening to a podcast. Every day he empties the dishwasher, washes up any dishes we dirtied after the kitchen was cleaned from dinner, sweeps the downstairs, washes and refills my water bottle, and a few other tasks. I get to sleep a little later and wake up to a house that is cleaner than when I went to bed. It’s the little things- he folds the lap quilt I use every evening, and puts my current book at the table so I can read during breakfast...that show me that he’s paying attention to things that can make my day a little nicer. This made me smile so much. thank you for sharing this. Years ago when dh realized just how much I did for our family while he was at work long hours he decided to start waking up half an hour earlier to make a hot breakfast every morning for the family. While many of our family tasks go through seasons of who focuses on it, him making breakfast hasn't changed other than the fact that now I'm able to sneak downstairs early some days to make him breakfast. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mathnerd Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 DH and I don't eat the same kind of foods and he does not cook and never goes out to eat these days due to the pandemic. So, I cook mostly the stuff he likes to eat every day. I also try to make use of gourmet ingredients and make the dishes as fancy as possible to simulate how a fancy restaurant might make and plate it. He also loves his coffee and I make it twice a day for him. He sure appreciates it because he talks a lot on the phone with his other friends who work from home and who are getting tired of cooking every meal for themselves. In return, he has started folding the laundry every day which is a task that I hate. He also started getting involved in pushing my teen to wake up in the morning and to go to bed in the night which are long and drawn out rituals in my house. So, I have two unpleasant tasks out of my way! 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 I left my phone at my dr's office, and I didn't realize it until I got home. I was exhausted. Dh went to my dr's for me, to get it. 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El... Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 I was working outside on an impulsive project yesterday, and Dh came outside to remind me to put on sunscreen. 🙂 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kbutton Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 DH keeps the vehicles gassed as much as he can manage, and if things are low, and he can't, he makes sure I know. I HATE getting gas. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 Funny, after I posted that I most always take Dh coffee, this morning he brings it to me. He brought his computer home last night and was working until 11 and now back at it at 6:15 this morning. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 My SO makes dinner almost every night. This semester I've had classes than run until 5:15 on four nights. He times dinner so its ready when I'm done with class. If any of you remember those discussions we've had about things you hate, one of mine is cooking, so I'm thrilled. He often makes me more coffee before he leaves for work- I'm working at home. He gets my morning coffee refills because we generally have a chat time before we get ready for the day. I buy him little things like I bought him a DVD this week of a movie he'd remembered from childhood. I often buy him books too. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soror Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 Dh sends me some thinking of you/love you text nearly every morning. I pack his lunch for him, even though he is home and perfectly capable of doing this on his own. When he is home on the weekends he will volunteer and insist on running errands even though he is stupid busy because he knows I hate errands. Dh will randomly buy me chocolate when he is in the store for something else. Dh is always randomly telling me he loves me. I am much more an acts of service person and will do things around the house for him to make his life easier. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stephanier.1765 Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 After all the health drama I experienced last month, my DH has taken over the scooping of the litter boxes daily. That's a huge thing for him because even when he needed to do it whenever I was unavailable, he would only do a half-way job and not even do that every day. His usual thing is to grab me a vegan treat whenever he comes across one but this one is even better. It's a commitment and it's one that is meant to help prevent me from having another bad episode. We don't know if litter box cleaning has any negative effects but he's not taking any chances. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted April 28, 2021 Share Posted April 28, 2021 Today my act of love for my dh was listening to him (while he was driving to work and I was at my desk at work ) rant about masks and people not wearing them and people not getting vaccinated. He heard something on NPR that was either incorrect or he heard it wrong.....but he thought the CDC had revised their guidelines and what he was saying did not make sense. But I just listened. And when he ran out of steam I said, 'well, I have the CDC newest guidelines from yesterday pulled up right now. I will read over it and we can talk about it later.' That seemed to help him calm down. Then I told him we just have to do the best we can and we can't control others. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheReader Posted April 29, 2021 Share Posted April 29, 2021 On 4/27/2021 at 5:18 PM, Kareni said: My husband packs lunch once a week. I've been enclosing a short note and a piece of chocolate to brighten his day. When he used to travel on business, I'd include what we came to call sock notes, a note hidden inside each pair of socks, so that he'd find a note each morning. Regards, Kareni I did the same with the sock notes when my DH was traveling; I should hide some in his socks next time I fold the laundry. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheReader Posted April 29, 2021 Share Posted April 29, 2021 We're another uneven couple here, where my DH is amazing, and I don't think I come close, but he's happy. He packs my lunch for me on the days I go teach at the co-op (with extras to share with my kiddos that need stuff, and a chocolate for me). He makes the coffee every morning (but I pour/fix our cups of coffee the way we each like it). If he's going to be gone in the morning, he'll get it all set up and leave a note that says "just push start." Like others in this thread, now that he's working from home and sees all the things, he's taken on more of the load. He's here and able to do so, I'm out of the house more than him these days, and so he cooks dinner many nights, runs DS to co-op once/week (I teach and have to be there at 8:00, DS doesn't have class until 10:30, and while he could come with me and be in Study Hall, DH is able to run him up at 10:30 instead). We have regular time together, sitting and talking, watching TV shows (and talking during/after) together "just us", etc., but it's those little things I guess that really say "gosh, I love you, and this isn't just routine or habit or because I have to." I try and do things like that for him, too, but he's just so much better at it than me. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hjffkj Posted April 29, 2021 Author Share Posted April 29, 2021 another thing he'll do is draw me a bath that evening if I've mentioned that I'm having muscle aches. He knows that more likely than not I'm not going to take the time for myself unless everything else on my to do list is done. So, he just draws the bath and usually handles whatever I'm currently doing so I'll go soak in the tub 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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