Anyone want to place a bet?

[DawnM]

If you have been following my saga, my weekly calls with my relative (whose child I have as a foster child) have ended in anywhere from 30 seconds to 5 minutes.   Occasionally they last longer.    She can't NOT swear, say inappropriate things, scream, yell, etc....before we have to hang up.

 

So......tonight is another call and in order to psych myself up for it, I need to make jokes.

Take a stab at it......how many seconds or minutes do you think tonight's call will last?

[Indigo Blue]

Sorry you are going through that.

[fraidycat]

2 minutes, 5 seconds.

 

(((DawnM)))

[hjffkj]

42 seconds

[Scarlett]

1 minute 14 seconds.

[Katy]

3 minutes. I think she’ll behave relatively well tonight and then ruin it with an insane social media post. 

[Spryte]

6 minutes ago, Katy said:

3 minutes. I think she’ll behave relatively well tonight and then ruin it with an insane social media post. 

Great minds.  I was thinking she’d try hard tonight and make it to 3 mins 30 seconds, then go out in a blazing glory of swear words.  The insane social media post is like icing on the cake.  Good call.

OP, I totally get dark humor.  Sometimes it’s all that gets you through!

Hug your little one tight, and keep laughing today.  Hang in there!

[Junie]

Maybe you need a Bingo card?

Hugs for you (and especially your little one) and hoping everything goes better tonight.

[fairfarmhand]

You definitely need a bingo card.

2 minutes 53 seconds.

[AmandaVT]

Are we using Price is Right rules here? 

1 min, 36 sec

I'm on team bingo card too. 

*hugs*

[theelfqueen]

Put me down for 1 minute 47 seconds.

[itsheresomewhere]

2 minutes 15 seconds.

 I will add to the list- moments of long pauses. 

Edited April 21, 2021 by itsheresomewhere

[Danae]

Two minutes even.

[alisoncooks]

2 min 37 sec

 

Bingo card suggestions: drops the f-bomb, blames you for something, blames someone else for something, guilt tripping, acts perfectly normal for 30 continuous seconds, mentions $ problems. 

[LinRTX]

2 minutes 27 seconds

[Catwoman]

Will there be prizes? 😉 

(Good luck with the call, Dawn! )

[KungFuPanda]

8 minutes!

 

[DawnM]

Let me start with this;   the very first call we had she started the conversation to her son with, "I miss you so F---ing much"

You know, normal things you say to a 2 year old......🤣

Then she went into crazy town about 6 months in and decided I was using him for child slavery and screamed into the phone, "You beat their *sses!   You hear me?   You beat their *sses!~

There is so so much more, but you know, you get the idea.

[DawnM]

14 minutes ago, Seasider too said:

I think we all would have fun with bingo cards. 

More fun if we can turn it into a drinking game.

[Pam in CT]

1 hour ago, KungFuPanda said:

8 minutes!

 

That's the spirit!!  Hope springs eternal!

 

(( hugs )) Dawn... holding you all in the light.

[Terabith]

5 minuts 42 seconds

[DawnM]

UPDATE:   No phone call tonight.   I just got word.   she broke her phone (again!   She breaks them monthly at least.)

YIPPEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will hold the bets for next Wed night's call.

[Melissa in Australia]

So glad re broken phone

😁

next week  20 seconds

[Catwoman]

2 hours ago, DawnM said:

More fun if we can turn it into a drinking game.

After all you’re going through with her, you deserve a drink! (Or two.... or three...)

I hope she can’t get a new phone for a few weeks, so you get a much-deserved break!

[DawnM]

3 minutes ago, Catwoman said:

After all you’re going through with her, you deserve a drink! (Or two.... or three...)

I hope she can’t get a new phone for a few weeks, so you get a much-deserved break!

8 weeks until trial and then NO MORE CALLS!  8 more calls.   I can do this.   I can do this.

[Catwoman]

Just now, DawnM said:

8 weeks until trial and then NO MORE CALLS!  8 more calls.   I can do this.   I can do this.

Praying for everything to go smoothly with no delays!!!

[DawnM]

18 hours ago, Catwoman said:

Praying for everything to go smoothly with no delays!!!

Thank you.   The child has been removed from the home for TWO SOLID YEARS now.   He is only 3.5 years old.  We love him to bits.

[Catwoman]

1 hour ago, DawnM said:

Thank you.   The child has been removed from the home for TWO SOLID YEARS now.   He is only 3.5 years old.  We love him to bits.

He is very lucky to be in such a loving home. ❤️

[LifeLovePassion]

 

You've got this! Hopefully the next 8 weeks fly by for you!

[DawnM]

18 hours ago, Catwoman said:

He is very lucky to be in such a loving home. ❤️

Well, hopefully he is lucky.....ask him again when he is a teenager! 😜

But we feel very strongly that God just plopped him in our lap, so how could we say no?

[Sdel]

Can I just say that I get it.  My grandson’s mom tells him at every visit some version of he’ll catch COVID and die if he doesn’t wear a mask (he’s 7).  Talking about masking is one thing....scaring him about dying is another thing completely....

[Ottakee]

3 hours ago, DawnM said:

Well, hopefully he is lucky.....ask him again when he is a teenager! 😜

But we feel very strongly that God just plopped him in our lap, so how could we say no?

I remember when you got the call and the whirlwind of the first few weeks.

[DawnM]

1 minute ago, Ottakee said:

I remember when you got the call and the whirlwind of the first few weeks.

You know, it is interesting, I still am so thankful for Covid and the fact that I was able to be home from April-late Aug and then only went in M-Th until just this month.   It was a blessing to have more time with him and bond.

His mother was actually ok for the first few months.   She thought it was temporary.   Once she realized it was becoming long term she flipped out and has accused me of all sorts of things.   She has accused the DSS worker too, and the judge.....it is hard to watch.

[Harriet Vane]

Counting down those eight weeks. Thank God.

I'm on for next week's drinking Bingo game.  I'll say one minute. 

[DawnM]

Ok, so, it actually lasted 4 min. and 22 seconds.   I decided to take it outside so he would be kind of busy playing and it worked.   She didn't say too much until she started yelling, "I am getting a lawyer!   They are keeping you illegally!   I am coming to get you!"   There were a few expletives in there I won't repeat.

7 more calls.

[hjffkj]

1 minute ago, DawnM said:

Ok, so, it actually lasted 4 min. and 22 seconds.   I decided to take it outside so he would be kind of busy playing and it worked.   She didn't say too much until she started yelling, "I am getting a lawyer!   They are keeping you illegally!   I am coming to get you!"   There were a few expletives in there I won't repeat.

7 more calls.

I was way off

[klmama]

7 more calls until trial.  So, what happens then?  Do you think she'll stop calling once her rights are terminated?  Is that part of the legal requirements?  

[DawnM]

6 minutes ago, klmama said:

7 more calls until trial.  So, what happens then?  Do you think she'll stop calling once her rights are terminated?  Is that part of the legal requirements?  

 

These are mandatory calls.   Once she loses her rights, she gets no calls.

[klmama]

That's good.  I wish you all the best as you count down the days.  

[Harriet Vane]

Glad this one is done. 🙂

[LifeLovePassion]

I am going to say 3 minutes 12 seconds next time. 

 

7 more...deep breath...you can do it!

[DawnM]

Ok, drumroll please!.....................................................tonight's call lasted...........

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

63 seconds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Yup, you heard right folks.   She started screaming at her son, "get your damn f***ing hand off the umbrella" as he was trying to open the umbrella on the table.

 

Then she texted me for 3 hours yelling at me, calling me all kinds of names and telling me to get my hand off her son's d*ck.    She is disgusting.

 

6 more calls. 6.

[mommyoffive]

3 minutes ago, DawnM said:

Ok, drumroll please!.....................................................tonight's call lasted...........

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

63 seconds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Yup, you heard right folks.   She started screaming at her son, "get your damn f***ing hand off the umbrella" as he was trying to open the umbrella on the table.

 

Then she texted me for 3 hours yelling at me, calling me all kinds of names and telling me to get my hand off her son's d*ck.    She is disgusting.

 

6 more calls. 6.

Glad it was short!

Wow, she should not be talking to him and you shouldn't have to have contact with her.  I am sorry you  have to deal with her. 

[hjffkj]

9 minutes ago, DawnM said:

Ok, drumroll please!.....................................................tonight's call lasted...........

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

63 seconds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Yup, you heard right folks.   She started screaming at her son, "get your damn f***ing hand off the umbrella" as he was trying to open the umbrella on the table.

 

Then she texted me for 3 hours yelling at me, calling me all kinds of names and telling me to get my hand off her son's d*ck.    She is disgusting.

 

6 more calls. 6.

Closer to my original guess of 42 seconds but not quite there. 

So, glad only a few more calls.

[Ottakee]

Are these calls also monitored by a social worker and/or recorded ?  

[Carrie12345]

11 minutes ago, Ottakee said:

Are these calls also monitored by a social worker and/or recorded ?  

I’ve been wondering about that. I know there’s no consistency between different states, and even between counties. In my relatives’ situation inside the OP’s state, visitation calls had either a therapist or psychologist on the line, not even “just” a caseworker. And the content, while inappropriate, was nowhere near as abusive or disgusting as what this poor child is being subjected to.  This is heartbreaking.

[DawnM]

21 minutes ago, Ottakee said:

Are these calls also monitored by a social worker and/or recorded ?  

they are not recorded but the case worker is on them.   she isn't always paying attention.

[Ottakee]

3 minutes ago, DawnM said:

they are not recorded but the case worker is on them.   she isn't always paying attention.

Ugg can you legally record them?  Even using a second device to do so?   The more documentation the better.   And the worker SHOULD be paying attention..... especially to a visit that lasts only a minute or 2.

[DawnM]

2 minutes ago, Ottakee said:

Ugg can you legally record them?  Even using a second device to do so?   The more documentation the better.   And the worker SHOULD be paying attention..... especially to a visit that lasts only a minute or 2.

I can't figure out how.   They are on FaceTime and I can hit "record screen" but it won't record audio.

 

[DawnM]

As far as the case worker, I really don't want to blame her.   Many of the times, birth mom mumbles to herself or her "invisible friends" so the case worker can't hear.   I have the phone at my ear and then aim it down to the child so I can hear her mumbles/talking to herself even when a person standing right in front of her can't hear what she is saying.   And she talks so erratically and fast that it is hard to catch things.   And she makes no sense when she talks and talks about things from 25 years ago and today all in the same sentence and throws in things that have nothing to do with what she is talking about.   

Last night she was not mumbling, she was speaking clearly to her son, but the case worker had 2 calls to manage at once.   They are overworked and underpaid.   She is actually one of the best.   She writes 40 page documents on the birth mom for court and is very thorough.

Thankfully I have been given permission to hang up for any reason at all and whatever I tell the caseworker she said goes in the report.   

5 more.   Just five more.