Justine Bateman's aging face

[Soror]

https://time.com/5953951/justine-batemans-aging-face-and-why-she-doesnt-think-it-needs-fixing/?utm_source=twitter&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=social-share-article&utm_term=ideas_its-not-just-you&fbclid=IwAR1OSNInSvfkxjxP_HYsl3pnAuLKQ9m02_v70sGXDn_hm5mwMdvfjmlXGVc

https://people.com/style/justine-bateman-on-why-she-will-not-get-plastic-surgery/

https://www.vanityfair.com/style/2021/04/justine-bateman-doesnt-want-you-to-call-her-new-book-brave

Have you seen this?

I have to admit I was taken aback by the amount of aging she had but love the message.

I was just complaining to dh about how there is such a double standard. When men age they look distinguished and handsome, signs of aging in women are to my hidden and avoided at all costs.

ETA- It occurred to me my title might be offputting or send the wrong message- I just copied the first part of the title of the first article I read.

Edited April 15, 2021 by Soror

[Penelope]

I think she looks like a normal woman in her 50’s. Maybe with a little more sun damage than others have. 
The photo in the black T-shirt seems to use the most unflattering lighting or angle, or something, trying to highlight the wrinkles. 
 

I like the message a lot, but also, no one would probably have any idea who she is anymore if it weren’t for these books she wrote, and her putting herself out there with her messaging about normal aging.

Isn’t this similar to what Jamie Lee Curtis tried to do? Except that she was saying it after already having procedures.

[ktgrok]

Good for her! I HATE constnatly seeing ads telling me I need to fix my face/skin! Yes, it is older No crap. 

[Hyacinth]

This statement resonates with me:

"However, Bateman argues that even when we think we’re buying more time with cosmetic procedures, it’s an illusion, a Ponzi scheme in which age always wins."

I admit to being more open to Botox treatments in my 50s than I was in my 30s or 40s. (But of course! I didn't look "old" back then!) 

But I do wonder . . . to what end? Do women who start down that road for, say, professional purposes, give it up when they retire?

Is the goal always to look younger than you actually are? Even if that "look" is obviously chemically produced?

Just rambling here . . .

 

[Spy Car]

I'm one who strongly embraces the idea of aging gracefully.

For example, I love it when beautiful women allow their hair to go silver, as cultural heroes of mine like Joan Baez and Emmylou Harris have done. Much preferable to my taste than covering it with dye. Perhaps that's a minority position, but one I embrace entirely. Botox? no.

But, unfortunately, that's not what's going on with Justine. I met her multiple times when we were both young, post-Family Ties but not that many years later, as we had a mutual friend in common.

The problem was--and I presume still is--that she smoked like a fiend.

The term "chain smoker" has never been more applicable to anyone I've encountered. Even decades ago I could see the smoking was taking a toll. 

So while I embrace the idea of "aging naturally," that's not the path that she has followed in my estimation. She has unfortunately damaged herself due to an addiction that has consequences. It isn't nature that has carved the lines in her face, but toxic cigarette smoke.

Forgive my honesty.

Bill

 

Edited April 15, 2021 by Spy Car

[marbel]

I hadn't seen it, and had forgotten who Justine Bateman is.  I would rather see women aging naturally than turning themselves into cartoon figures with duck lips and other hazards of anti-aging efforts.  Google Carla Bruni and look at her before and after photos. She was truly beautiful and I think would have aged beautifully; now I think she looks terrible. 

[hippymamato3]

I think she's beautiful. Age and wrinkles -  they tell a story. There's beauty in each of those stories.

[ktgrok]

Also, the idea that women submit to real PAIN to look younger just blows me away. And for what? Half the time the difference after all these peels and abrasions is barely noticable. 

[Penelope]

4 minutes ago, Spy Car said:

I'm one who strongly embraces the idea of aging gracefully.

For example, I love it when beautiful women allow their hair to go silver, as cultural heroes of mine like Joan Baez and Emmylou Harris have done. Much preferable to my taste than covering it with dye. Perhaps that's a minority position, but one I embrace entirely. Botox? no.

But, unfortunately, that's not what's going on with Justine. I met her multiple times when we were both young, post-Family Ties but not that many years later, as we had a mutual friend in common.

The problem was--and I presume still is--that she smoked like a fiend.

The term "chain smoker" has never been more applicable to anyone I've encountered. Even decades ago I could see the smoking was taking a toll. 

So while I embrace the idea of "aging naturally," that's not the path that she has followed in my estimation. She has unfortunately damaged herself due to an addiction that has consequences. It isn't nature that has carved the lines in her face, but toxic cigarette smoke.

Forgive my honesty.

Bill

 

That does explain a lot. I was thinking she was probably a sun worshiper, but smoking will do it, too, maybe worse,

[MEmama]

She is stunning. Honesty, strength and vulnerability will do that to a woman. 🙂 

We need more women speaking out to help normalise aging. Good for her. 👍
 

 

[Soror]

 

9 minutes ago, Spy Car said:

I'm one who strongly embraces the idea of aging gracefully.

For example, I love it when beautiful women allow their hair to go silver, as cultural heroes of mine like Joan Baez and Emmylou Harris have done. Much preferable to my taste than covering it with dye. Perhaps that's a minority position, but one I embrace entirely. Botox? no.

But, unfortunately, that's not what's going on with Justine. I met her multiple times when we were both young, post-Family Ties but not that many years later, as we had a mutual friend in common.

The problem was--and I presume still is--that she smoked like a fiend.

The term "chain smoker" has never been more applicable to anyone I've encountered. Even decades ago I could see the smoking was taking a toll. 

So while I embrace the idea of "aging naturally," that's not the path that she has followed in my estimation. She has unfortunately damaged herself due to an addiction that has consequences. It isn't nature that has carved the lines in her face, but toxic cigarette smoke.

Forgive my honesty.

Bill

 

Thankfully for me my husband is of the same mind. He was just telling me how good a mutual female friend's naturally graying hair looks. He has a strong dislike for the look of women with much make-up, hair dye, cosmetic procedures etc.

She looks more aged than others I know that age and older but knowing that she was a smoker explains it. She is also very thing, weight tends to fill out a lot of those wrinkles.

[Soror]

2 minutes ago, Seasider too said:

So much more than cosmetics and procedures go into healthy skin that ages well! Smoking definitely ages one faster, both skin and teeth. Some eating disorders and other medical conditions do the same. 
 

I am all for quality moisturizers to help preserve my skin - it’s the body’s largest organ and barrier to infection! But not for vanity purposes. A youthful look has a lot do do with healthy lifestyle habits and a peaceful life. 

Very true. I wish I was more militant about sunscreen when I was younger. I am very glad that I didn't get nearly as into as tanning as many in my area. 

[Soror]

12 minutes ago, MEmama said:

She is stunning. Honesty, strength and vulnerability will do that to a woman. 🙂 

We need more women speaking out to help normalise aging. Good for her. 👍
 

 

Yes we do. There are so many voices in our culture pushing things further and further it will take many more to change anything.

[Katy]

We accept male aging more because everyone looks more masculine as they age. Men wear it better.  Though to be fair, quite a bit of aging is genetic. There was a guy I want to high school with at my last class reunion and I wouldn’t have recognized him out of that context. He looked at least 25 years older than the rest of us. 

[Garga]

1 hour ago, Spy Car said:

I'm one who strongly embraces the idea of aging gracefully.

For example, I love it when beautiful women allow their hair to go silver, as cultural heroes of mine like Joan Baez and Emmylou Harris have done. Much preferable to my taste than covering it with dye. Perhaps that's a minority position, but one I embrace entirely. Botox? no.

But, unfortunately, that's not what's going on with Justine. I met her multiple times when we were both young, post-Family Ties but not that many years later, as we had a mutual friend in common.

The problem was--and I presume still is--that she smoked like a fiend.

The term "chain smoker" has never been more applicable to anyone I've encountered. Even decades ago I could see the smoking was taking a toll. 

So while I embrace the idea of "aging naturally," that's not the path that she has followed in my estimation. She has unfortunately damaged herself due to an addiction that has consequences. It isn't nature that has carved the lines in her face, but toxic cigarette smoke.

Forgive my honesty.

Bill

 

Ok, that explains a lot. To me, in the picture with the black shirt she looks waaaaaaay older than 55. I have friends who are 55 (I’m 48 myself) and they do not look like that at all. She looks more like my MIL who is in her 70s, honestly. And the lighting in that picture seems too harsh. I think she looks really bad for a 55-year old in that first picture and not just because she’s not using botox. She looks like she’s had a rough life in that one. And the jet-black eye liner on the bottom of the eye doesn’t help.

However, the picture with the green feather boa looks closer to what I would expect a 55-year old to look like, especially one who smokes. I don’t think she looks bad at all in the 2nd picture. Very normal looking 55 year old. The lighting is softer than in the first picture. It helps not to have a blazing spotlight right on her face. 

Edited April 15, 2021 by Garga

[elegantlion]

Oh, yeah, smoking would do that. 

I notice she is 55, if you look at her brother, Jason Bateman, he's starting to get some of the same kind of wrinkling, laugh lines, but less extreme - maybe he doesn't smoke. He's 52, I think?

I'm nearly 54 and I've always had good skin, but I'm starting to notice some aging that is annoying.

I also agree, the lighting in the black tee photo is lighted to show more wrinkles. 

[pinball]

55 minutes ago, Spy Car said:

I'm one who strongly embraces the idea of aging gracefully.

For example, I love it when beautiful women allow their hair to go silver, as cultural heroes of mine like Joan Baez and Emmylou Harris have done. Much preferable to my taste than covering it with dye. Perhaps that's a minority position, but one I embrace entirely. Botox? no.

But, unfortunately, that's not what's going on with Justine. I met her multiple times when we were both young, post-Family Ties but not that many years later, as we had a mutual friend in common.

The problem was--and I presume still is--that she smoked like a fiend.

The term "chain smoker" has never been more applicable to anyone I've encountered. Even decades ago I could see the smoking was taking a toll. 

So while I embrace the idea of "aging naturally," that's not the path that she has followed in my estimation. She has unfortunately damaged herself due to an addiction that has consequences. It isn't nature that has carved the lines in her face, but toxic cigarette smoke.

Forgive my honesty.

Bill

 

charming

/end sarcasm

[Sneezyone]

13 minutes ago, Garga said:

Ok, that explains a lot. To me, in the picture with the black shirt she looks waaaaaaay older than 55. I have friends who are 55 (I’m 48 myself) and they do not look like that at all. She looks more like my MIL who is in her 70s, honestly. And the lighting in that picture seems too harsh. I think she looks really bad for a 55-year old in that first picture and not just because she’s not using botox. She looks like she’s had a rough life in that one. And the jet-black eye liner on the bottom of the eye doesn’t help.

However, the picture with the green feather boa looks closer to what I would expect a 55-year old to look like, especially one who smokes. I don’t think she looks bad at all in the 2nd picture. Very normal looking 55 year old. The lighting is softer than in the first picture. It helps not to have a blazing spotlight right on your face. 

This was the same thought I had. Also agree that after a certain age, extra weight helps, both for men and women.

[catz]

I mean looking at her, I would have guess smoker and/or 80's sun worshipper.  But she looks fine to me.  Smoking is an addiction for many people and some women have additional motivation continue it because it keeps them lean.  But really, so what?  I've never  smoked in my life, but we all have flaws right? 

I also think as a society, we are so used to seeing airbrushed and heavily edited photos of women in the media.    At least she's real.  

[SounderChick]

I agree she looks like a smoker or sun worshipper but so what that is part of her story.  I am only in my 30's and so frustrated with how much things like anti aging treatments dominant conversations with groups of women.  I watch them throw money away on creams and treatments that don't do anything. They stress and worry.  Beautiful amazing accomplished women who have so much more to offer this world than flawless skin.  

[AbcdeDooDah]

Smoking explains a lot. She has also aged like the vegans I know. I wonder if she is. 

I have a Grand Canyon in between my eyebrows. Botox was tempting at first until talking to my friends whose faces don't move. No, thanks.

[Carrie12345]

My own issue is less about wanting people to think I’m young and more about being in a little bit of denial about my chronological age.  Lately, if I flex my fingers back and notice the faint crepe in my skin, my brain is like, whoa, who’s hand is that?!  It isn’t familiar yet. I don’t immediately recognize it as me. I don’t feel like I’m ready to change yet.

Is normalizing aging important? Absolutely. Do I want someone to peg me as 10 years younger? Not especially. But I am having some inside emotions about aging that I’m gradually dealing with, but it’s a slow process. If I occasionally put on some “young” make up while I’m coming to grips, that’s just me in my awkward stage. 😉 

[MEmama]

25 minutes ago, Ordinary Shoes said:

I agree that we need to normalize aging. It's nice to see a woman who looks like her age. 

However, I dye my hair (have since I was about 22 - I got my first gray hairs in high school) and recently had BOTOX. I have always looked younger than I am (as long as I dye my hair) and I suppose that I like that. I have good genes. My mother always looked about 10 years younger than she is too. I wish I had been more careful about sunscreen when I was younger because now I've got sunspots that I can't get rid of. 

We shame women both ways. On one hand, we shame women for looking "old." But then we shame women for trying to look younger too. I've been lectured many times about why I should let my hair go gray naturally. I really don't want to do that and it's my hair, so what difference does it make to them? It's not like if I went gray naturally that I would look my age (50). The gray hair would make me look older than I am. 

My DH and I are the same age and he has gray hair and my hair is dyed. People often assume that he's DD's grandfather. 

 

Yes, I think there is a big difference between wanting to look our best, and trying to look not-our-age. 
 

I dye my hair, I use sunscreen and moisturiser every day, I wear flattering makeup, I do my nails and I try to look generally put together. Those things help me look and *feel* my best. I do them for me, even when I’m home alone. I do not do them to look younger than my 48 years, though I do, nor to impress anyone else.
 

I feel the same about going grey right now—it wouldn’t match how I feel and wouldn’t look right on me right now. Sure I might not  get carded anymore, but I’d still look young, just with grey hair. Some day I’ll want to go natural and when I do I’ll be comfortable with it and do so without regret. Why is it anyone else’s concern? 

[Acadie]

2 hours ago, Garga said:

And the jet-black eye liner on the bottom of the eye doesn’t help.

I'm not one for commenting on women's appearances, normally, and I don't know a whole lot about makeup, but I totally agree that heavy black eye liner on lower lids draws the eye downward and exaggerates the appearance of aging. There are lots of makeup techniques for upper lids that visually lift the eye.

If a makeup artist was involved, it's as if they were trying to maximize the mature look. 

Edited April 15, 2021 by Acadie

[MercyA]

2 hours ago, pinball said:

charming

/end sarcasm

Dude, what the heck? 

I love it when @Spy Car weighs in on these kind of threads. 

My husband loves my grays and would prefer me not to dye my hair, but I like it better dyed, so I do. For now. I don't plan on ever having short hair, though, even when it is gray. 🙂 

Edited April 15, 2021 by MercyA

[catz]

Just now, MercyA said:

Dude, what the heck? 

I love it when @Spy Car weighs in on these kind of threads. 

My husband loves my grays and would prefer me not to dye my hair, but I like it better dyed, so I do. For now. 🙂 

Well to be fair, I often agree with Spy but I did kind of read that response as aging gracefully is cool as long as you have good genetics and live a crystal clean life.  

And I absolutely agree no one should get flack for whatever they choose to do with their graying hair, etc.  I try to make healthy choices, I do use moisturizer and sunscreen. I have not had makeup on my face since before covid to be honest.  I am 50 and i just really do not care at all what people think at this point.  I have some garbage genetics when it comes to aging well and it is what it is. So I can kind of relate to her look as a 50 year old.  I lead a much cleaner existence than my parents ever did too.  My husband though hit the genetics jackpot that way and he is 8 years older than me.  

[Miss Tick]

2 hours ago, Sneezyone said:

after a certain age, extra weight helps,

Glad to hear that I am just "working ahead" in this area! 😄

[Melissa Louise]

Unsurprisingly, I also think it's tacky for blokes to gossip about a woman's aging looks.  

~

Women age. Especially in our 50's and onwards. Some age more visibly than others - often down to luck of the (genetic/environmental) draw. It's a problem that this is seen as something that needs fixing or disguising, lest the aging woman offend some notion of acceptable, presentable 'womanhood'. 

(Just as offensive, imo, for men to give women 'permission' to age, because they find it attractive. It's nothing to do with you and what you like/don't like! Women don't need to be reassured of their sexual attractiveness to men in order to decide whether or not to spend their resources on 'fighting' aging)

Personally, I think it's best to focus on preserving function as we age - that's where I'm spending my time/money. Not on flipping Botox. 

 

 

[lmrich]

Smoking, sun damage and being incredible thin will make your face look older

If I can weigh in, (pun intended) a little fullness in the face hides wrinkles, too. At least that is what I tell myself... 

 

[Sneezyone]

1 minute ago, SusanC said:

Glad to hear that I am just "working ahead" in this area! 😄

Same!! 🤣

It’s never occurred to me or anyone I know to use dermal fillers. Must be the extra meat on the bones.☺️

[Spy Car]

3 minutes ago, MercyA said:

Dude, what the heck? 

I love it when @Spy Car weighs in on these kind of threads. 

My husband loves my grays and would prefer me not to dye my hair, but I like it better dyed, so I do. For now. I don't plan on ever having short hair, though, even when it is gray. 🙂 

My late mother-in-law was a very lovely woman and had (for my taste) the most perfect sort of silver hair one could hope for, rich color and streaked with natural highlights. I loved it and frequently complimented her, which I think she appreciated immensely as she wasn't immune to the pressures people feel to look young. She's always ask, "you don't think it makes me look old?" Not to me, I'd always reply, I think it looks perfect and really enhances your beauty (which was true).

I've always been a guy you has looked young for my age. Can't complain, but one reaches a time when a little gravitas is not unwelcome. I've fixed that problem. At the start of "lockdown" I decided I grow a beard. Never really had one--not for long anyway, always seemed disappointing. Not sure what change this time, but dang!

This "yeard" is positively patriarchal looking. Not sure if it is more like Charlton Heston as Moses or "the big guy" with Adam on the Sistine chapel, but what a difference! Instead of looking a decade younger than my years, I think I look 10 years older, so a gain of +20. I love it.

My son who already has to contend with a having a dad old enough to be his grandfather sometimes says, "Dad, you you now that beard makes you really look old?" I always break out in a huge smile and say, "I know! Don't you love it!?"

In any case, better than a 2-pack a day habit, I suppose?

Bill

[Indigo Blue]

Someone mentioned the vegans they know aren’t aging well. I’ve never heard this. Is there anything to this? If so, why would that be? 

Ive been almost a vegan my whole life because I don’t like meat. I don’t look my age at all. I look much younger. I do take very good care of my skin very consistently, though. 

I’m not alarmed by hearing this. Just surprised and wondering what would make vegans more wrinkly. 

 

 

 

[Spy Car]

15 minutes ago, FuzzyCatz said:

Well to be fair, I often agree with Spy but I did kind of read that response as aging gracefully is cool as long as you have good genetics and live a crystal clean life.  

 

That's rather a stretch.

Bill

 

[fairfarmhand]

As someone whose hair is thin, I color it. It looks so much fuller and better with some color in it. If I had a nice head of hair, I would have no shame about going gray, but I do need to look like I have SOME hair. That's the major reason that I color it. Because it looks limp and scraggly without some dye .

[Melissa Louise]

So gross, in a thread about women and aging, one man has to make it about himself. I am totally not surprised but dude, butt out. Start your own thread about the wonder of being a young looking man with a beard who graciously provides beautiful women with encouragement to have (no doubt expensively maintained) silver locks. 

 

[MercyA]

1 minute ago, Melissa Louise said:

So gross, in a thread about women and aging, one man has to make it about himself. I am totally not surprised but dude, butt out. Start your own thread about the wonder of being a young looking man with a beard who graciously provides beautiful women with encouragement to have (no doubt expensively maintained) silver locks. 

You know I love you, but I didn't read it this way at all. 

[Indigo Blue]

Well, deleting what I just said. I meant it to be funny, but I don’t want to be misunderstood.

[Spy Car]

3 minutes ago, Melissa Louise said:

So gross, in a thread about women and aging, one man has to make it about himself. I am totally not surprised but dude, butt out. Start your own thread about the wonder of being a young looking man with a beard who graciously provides beautiful women with encouragement to have (no doubt expensively maintained) silver locks. 

 

Wrong about the expensively maintained silver locks. She went natural in part due to financial pressures she had as a result of her husband (my father-in-law) being ill. You are wrong about that and wrong about the rest.

Bill

[bookbard]

5 minutes ago, Sneezyone said:

Must be the extra meat on the bones.

Yeah, they're starting to say that it's healthier for women to be a bit overweight as you get older (therefore not overweight, right? They mean they need to change the 'what is healthy' bmi stuff for older women). In fact, being underweight was (by itself) a higher risk of stuff like strokes and heart attacks than being obese (but obesity came with co-morbidities that upped the risk factor).

https://journals.lww.com/md-journal/Fulltext/2017/12010/Underweight__another_risk_factor_for.32.aspx

 

[Melissa Louise]

23 hours ago, MercyA said:

You know I love you, but I didn't read it this way at all. 

Better in a PM.

 

Edited April 16, 2021 by Melissa Louise

[Spy Car]

1 minute ago, Ordinary Shoes said:

I kind of see her point. I know that @Spy Car is trying to be nice here but his post could be interpreted as offensive. 

 

That's the wonder of the internet, there is literally nothing that can't cause offense if one is determined enough to divine ill intent.

Bill

 

[Spy Car]

Just now, Melissa Louise said:

Bill has a history on these boards of compliment- bombing female posters who coo over him, and of being rude, condescending and downright sexist to women who don't. He was removed from the Politics group at one stage for this behaviour.  You can respond to him how you wish. 

He doesn't need defending, he's a big boy, full of male and socio-economic privilege. And yeah, I 100% think it's gross for him to gossip about Bateman, and even grosser to talk about women as he does. 

When he sticks to dog threads, it's tolerable. When he wants to play at having valuable input on wen and aging, it's not.

Just my opinion, of course.

Having been harrassed in the past by Bill for the crime of not agreeing with him, I don't/won't engage with him directly, but seriously...dudes who think they can judge an aging woman? Not my fave kind of dude. 

 

A bunch of malarkey.

Bill

[Melissa Louise]

Back to Bateman...

Sun is what damages white skin. White skin in high UV environments will age fairly quickly, even with sunscreens. Throw in menopause and yes, it doesn't surprise me a 55 year old Bateman looks older than pre-menopausal women with other skin tones, living in less extreme environments. 

It's only a problem where it is negatively correlated with competency or likeability. 

To.me, that's what we should be focused on with regard to aging - age-based discrimination. 

[MercyA]

Yikes.

Okay, call me unenlightened, but I LIKE hearing what men think about these kinds of things. 😬

I'm not touching the rest of it with a ten-foot-pole. Both of you have always been kind to me and I consider you friends. 

[Spy Car]

3 minutes ago, Melissa Louise said:

Back to Bateman...

Sun is what damages white skin. White skin in high UV environments will age fairly quickly, even with sunscreens. Throw in menopause and yes, it doesn't surprise me a 55 year old Bateman looks older than pre-menopausal women with other skin tones, living in less extreme environments. 

It's only a problem where it is negatively correlated with competency or likeability. 

To.me, that's what we should be focused on with regard to aging - age-based discrimination. 

She had significant skin damage in her mid-twenties and it was directly due to her very heavy smoking habit. 

Los Angeles isn't an extreme environment. Trust me, I live there.

Your join date says December 2, 2020. I guess this it isn't the first screen name or account you've used on this forum, eh?

Bill

 

[Spy Car]

1 minute ago, Ordinary Shoes said:

I don't mind hearing about what a man has to say about these kinds of things but it's a bit...condescending? if it's phrased as if a man is "allowing" it. 

Also, his wording was inappropriate, e.g. "beautiful women." 

And like I wrote above, men say they like the "natural" look without acknowledging that what they like is not actually "natural." 

This is all problematic and the response to being called out about it should not be to suggest that people are looking for offense but to think about why it's problematic. 

 

LOL. Who said anything about "allowing" anything?

I happen to like silver/gray hair and and not so fond of frozen foreheads or plumped up lips. Shoot me for having an opinion. 

Bill

[Melissa Louise]

Just now, Ordinary Shoes said:

I don't mind hearing about what a man has to say about these kinds of things but it's a bit...condescending? if it's phrased as if a man is "allowing" it. 

Also, his wording was inappropriate, e.g. "beautiful women." 

And like I wrote above, men say they like the "natural" look without acknowledging that what they like is not actually "natural." 

This is all problematic and the response to being called out about it should not be to suggest that people are looking for offense but to think about why it's problematic. 

 

The type is silver admired is often quite expensive and time consuming to maintain. I know and like the look, but it isn't 'natural' for many women. Often involves toners, judicious highlights, special shampoos, regular $ cuts and blow outs..it's a long way from just being an older woman who has let her hair grow out grey or white.  There's a lot of genetic luck + money behind who we hold up as models of graciously aging women. 

All women are entitled to visibly age the way their bodies age, and to be no less respected for it. Even 'ugly' or poor women. Even women whose aging, like Bateman's, isn't the soft lens kind. 

 

 

 

 

[Katy]

1 hour ago, Ordinary Shoes said:

I agree that we need to normalize aging. It's nice to see a woman who looks like her age. 

However, I dye my hair (have since I was about 22 - I got my first gray hairs in high school) and recently had BOTOX. I have always looked younger than I am (as long as I dye my hair) and I suppose that I like that. I have good genes. My mother always looked about 10 years younger than she is too. I wish I had been more careful about sunscreen when I was younger because now I've got sunspots that I can't get rid of. 

We shame women both ways. On one hand, we shame women for looking "o

Shhhh.... if you’re pale there are cheap electric “mole remover” pens on Amazon that let you burn them off like a dermatologist. Don’t go at it as aggressively as Dr Pimple Popper though, better to do it 2-3 times than scar yourself. Coat with neosporin, stay out of the sun, and sunblock religiously afterwards or you might get a scar or hyperpigmentation. There are dozens of YouTube videos. Don’t use them if you have dark skin or get keloid scars, and do it when you won’t be in public for at least a week to give it time to heal.

30 minutes ago, Indigo Blue said:

Someone mentioned the vegans they know aren’t aging well. I’ve never heard this. Is there anything to this? If so, why would that be? 

Ive been almost a vegan my whole life because I don’t like meat. I don’t look my age at all. I look much younger. I do take very good care of my skin very consistently, though. 

I’m not alarmed by hearing this. Just surprised and wondering what would make vegans more wrinkly. 

Some vegans I know that look terrible only eat junk food. Oreos & energy drinks may be vegan but not healthy. Others are sickly looking, pale, anxious, and have B vitamin deficiencies because they never supplement. Others were sick before they went vegan. 

[Spy Car]

Just now, Melissa Louise said:

The type is silver admired is often quite expensive and time consuming to maintain. I know and like the look, but it isn't 'natural' for many women. Often involves toners, judicious highlights, special shampoos, regular $ cuts and blow outs..it's a long way from just being an older woman who has let her hair grow out grey or white.  There's a lot of genetic luck + money behind who we hold up as models of graciously aging women. 

All women are entitled to visibly age the way their bodies age, and to be no less respected for it. Even 'ugly' or poor women. Even women whose aging, like Bateman's, isn't the soft lens kind. 

 

 

 

 

As I already said, my mother-in-law allowed herself to go silver as an economy  move in a moment when my in-laws were experiencing some financial hardship. In the luck of the draw she looked more beautiful not spending the money and dying her hair thans she did previously.

But why not double down on the insults? 

Bill

[Spy Car]

@Melissa Louise OK.  Now i'm clued into who you are 

You haven't changed a bit.

Should out shout out your name using my best Marlon Brando impersonation?

Bill