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[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[GracieJane]

No advice, but this is very cute. 🙂

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[Tanaqui]

Even when you're exclusively dating somebody it's not cheating to simply have friends of the same gender/sex as the person you're dating, or to text them, or to watch movies with them.

[Terabith]

My ninth grader says the watching a movie together sounds like it was probably a date.  That watching movies isn't necessarily a date, but that this sounded date like.  She says that the expectation is only "dating" one person at a time, but that it's also considered super rude for anyone you're dating to try to tell you you can't be friends with anyone else, regardless of gender.  

So casual texting would probably be okay, but "date texting" wouldn't be?

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[Terabith]

7 minutes ago, BaseballandHockey said:

I am reasonably certain that my kid has no idea how to tell if he was casually texting or date texting. 

His cousin suggested that they have a group text so they could all chat together but he didn’t actually make note of anyone’s phone number because he figured he’d be too shy to use them, so he doesn’t have girl3 or girl4’s number.  

Honestly, I wouldn't either.  This is partially why I married the first man I dated.  Simpler that way.  

But probably not the right strategy to use at 13.  

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[Katy]

Super cute. I’m not sure the etiquette either.

[easypeasy]

2 hours ago, GracieJane said:

No advice, but this is very cute. 🙂

So cute.

My kids in middle school talked/texted/SnapChatted with boys and girls alike around that age. Even if they were flirtier with some than with others. But, they really weren't interested in dating anyone, so it never became much of an issue. Plus there was lots more face-to-face talking time available, so their whole relationship wasn't based on texting (ugh, pandemic!). That's a whole other level of confusing. I feel for your son! lol

I LOVE that he's wondering about doing the right thing, though, and talking to you about it!! ♥ What a fine young man he's going to grow up to be! ♥

[GoodGrief3]

It’s fine.  🙂 

[Carrie12345]

Very cute.

I think there’s a lot of variation by area and individually, even outside of COVID, when it comes to this stuff. In my experience and my kids’ you only “date” one person at a time, but that requires two people knowing they’re dating, lol.

FWIW, my hs Senior has an exclusive relationship, but she communicates with other people all the time. In her scenario, everyone knows she’s dating someone.

I’d say he’s doing nothing wrong while he figures out his “status”. However, people’s feelings can sometimes get hurt even when nobody’s doing anything wrong. His or others’.

[SKL]

I think as long as neither girl considers their thing exclusive, he is free to interact casually with all other girls.

It might be wise for him to make sure both girls know where he stands on this.  For example, casually mentioning the other girl in conversation....

My daughter had something similar going on around age 12.  She was open with both boys about it.  Both of the boys eventually went on to have other "girlfriends" but remain good friends.

[Soror]

For my daughter 13 it isn't assumed you are 'exclusive' unless it is said and from what I've seen that wouldn't be expected after a few chats and movie watching. They call this stage "talking" and it can go on awhile before they decide to officially go out.