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Need to leave this here, please... :(


BakersDozen
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While I won't make this a JAWM I will say that anyone who gives my "dear, precious mom" or mil any benefit of the doubt is nuts. That being said...

My mom now lives 2 streets up. She's a narcissist, a manipulator, and the most selfish person I've ever known. And she's a con artist - time, possessions, money, she'll take whatever she can get from anyone.

My mil is a mean-spirited, undermining, manipulative woman. She literally corners my older kids and tells them how deprived their childhoods were, how everything is just so bad and they need to get out of the house as quickly as possible. She's a real treat.

Then we have our adopted "grandma" whom we first met in 2004. She has come over almost every week and has taught us to knit/crochet (all of us, boys and me included!). She's traveled with us and attended births that were not c/s. She is everything loving and good and kind. And tonight she told me she has cancer.

Ask me how freaking angry I am. Ask me how freaking unfair it is that the one woman who loves us and is a part of our lives in a beautiful way won't be here soon. But the con artist narcissist and the manipulative mil will be.

I want to scream. I'm already crying. Haven't told the kids yet (but will leave out the part about my mom/mil, I promise).

This woman walks in our door and our home brightens. Everything is set aside and everyone gathers to do a puzzle, drink hot tea, and just enjoy being together. And when she leaves there are smiles and an atmosphere of true happiness. She's just that good of a human being.

I am so sad.

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I'm sorry.  What is her prognosis?  is it that grim?  type of cancer can be a huge difference, as well as the stage.

maybe when she passes - you can move with no forwarding address. 

try to focus on how blessed you have been to have this woman in your life, and more importantly, that your children have had her in their life - many people don't have that.

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I am very sorry.  I hope it is one if tge growing cancers for which one of the new treatments ( or old) works for.  And there are cancers and cancers.  If you don't know which kind, don't assume the worse at all - with new treatments, some previously almost always deadly cancers, like some of the deadly brain tumors, and actually much less deadly now.  And there are some cancers that have always been veryming term cancers where peoole live for ten or twenty years mostly normal lives.

Life isnt fair.  Many hugs to you.

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I am so sorry. I am thankful that your children have had this wonderful “Grandma” in their lives for the time that they have. I agree with previous posters in that current cancer treatments are very promising and some people can add years of quality life, where that was once not possible. 

Hugs to you. 

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I'm so sorry. Life often seems completely unfair and arbitrary. But unless she's told you there is no hope, or that she won't pursue treatment  . . please don't bury her just yet. My DH was diagnosed with stage IV cancer almost four years ago, and a notoriously difficult type to treat. And he's still here. Had he been diagnosed with the same cancer just ten years ago in all likelihood he wouldn't still be around four years later. Things really have changed quickly. 

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I am so sorry for your family & this wonderful lady. It certainly isn't fair.

My dad was wonderful & he's gone while my not-nice mom is still around. DH's mom was sweet from all accounts & died of fast moving cancer not long after I met her. FIL is still around & he's a piece of work. So, God wanted the good ones with him, I guess.

We had adopted "grandparents" here in town who happily attended birthdays, homeschooling events, and loved on my kids. The "grandpa" got cancer & died within a year of diagnosis. "Grandma" moved away to be near her mom. (They were both young.) We feel their loss keenly every week. Many hugs!!

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