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Posted (edited)

I have to make a decision about whether or not I will teach again in the fall, and I have to decide this weekend. I cannot decide. Argghhhh! It's making me sick to my stomach.

[deleted]

Decision made - thanks everyone.

Edited by Noreen Claire
Posted

It sounds like you don't want to do it.  That is the answer.  I think it sounds great to take next year off and enjoy it with your kids.  My kids have been stuck at home this year too.  I want to make up for lost time and go do things and let them have fun. 

  • Like 7
Posted (edited)

I don't think this fall is the year for it. I was tracking with you until I saw the ages of your kids. They're still pretty young for you to be tied up the number of hours it would take to be practical.

I'd tell the boss that Zoom classes was the only only way that it'll work with family obligations. Since that's not an option, you'd have to bow out. It's the commute that's the deal breaker, sounds like.

Edited by fairfarmhand
  • Like 7
Posted (edited)

It sounds like you don't really want to do it and it doesn't work for your family. Please don't do it *just* because your boss is a friend. I know how fun teaching can be, and I know how hard it is not to fall into the obligation trap. The college will manage without you.

If your gut feels iffy, don't. That is, of course,  assuming you can afford it .

Will they be offering any online classes you could pick up? I imagine there would still be an increased demand 

Edited by regentrude
  • Like 6
Posted (edited)

You do already have teaching college on your resume.  
 

Also it sounds like your husband is not in favor.  To me this means it is not a financial sacrifice to him.

 

I think it sounds like a wonderful opportunity and an honor, but something that is not too good to pass up if it doesn’t seem like it will work out on a personal level.  
 

Edit:  to me it sounds like an opportunity that could come your way again in the future, more than something you have got to seize right now.  

Edited by Lecka
  • Like 3
Posted
20 minutes ago, fairfarmhand said:

I don't think this fall is the year for it. I was tracking with you until I saw the ages of your kids. They're still pretty young for you to be tied up the number of hours it would take to be practical.

I'd tell the boss that Zoom classes was the only only way that it'll work with family obligations. Since that's not an option, you'd have to bow out. It's the commute that's the deal breaker, sounds like.

ITA. 

  • Like 1
Posted

I have been in that situation in the past--a commute just about as far.  One of the deciding factors for me was that if you taught at least two classes you qualified for benefits.  Picking up my own health care and retirement contributions substantially increased the total pay I was receiving.   I had DH's support, or it would not have worked.  If he needed help during the evenings that I was working, it was his responsibility to arrange for that.

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Posted
45 minutes ago, Lecka said:

To me this means it is not a financial sacrifice to him.

We aren't desperate for the money. The extra money would be nice, but it's not a deciding factor at the moment.

31 minutes ago, BusyMom5 said:

you are just hesitant to let your friend down. 

I am very. I hate feeling like I let someone down. Even if I haven't really.

30 minutes ago, Bootsie said:

I have been in that situation in the past--a commute just about as far.  One of the deciding factors for me was that if you taught at least two classes you qualified for benefits.  Picking up my own health care and retirement contributions substantially increased the total pay I was receiving.   I had DH's support, or it would not have worked.  If he needed help during the evenings that I was working, it was his responsibility to arrange for that.

I get no extra benefit. The money is per course, no benefits at all.

If DH needed to arrange his own help for soccer practices, he would just take them out of soccer. 😕

  • Like 1
Posted
4 minutes ago, Noreen Claire said:

We aren't desperate for the money. The extra money would be nice, but it's not a deciding factor at the moment.

I am very. I hate feeling like I let someone down. Even if I haven't really.

I get no extra benefit. The money is per course, no benefits at all.

If DH needed to arrange his own help for soccer practices, he would just take them out of soccer. 😕

If the pay is anything like it is around here for per course teaching I would not do it.  Especially if a commute is involved.  I know someone who was offered $2000 to teach a semester course--and was going to have to pay almost $500 for a parking permit on the campus!

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Posted
20 minutes ago, Bootsie said:

If the pay is anything like it is around here for per course teaching I would not do it.  Especially if a commute is involved.  I know someone who was offered $2000 to teach a semester course--and was going to have to pay almost $500 for a parking permit on the campus!

It is $3k per class. Parking is free, but the cost of gas will be $300 for the semester.

Posted
1 hour ago, BusyMom5 said:

I think you already know your decision,  you are just hesitant to let your friend down. 

This was my thought too. It sounds like you don’t really want to from your post, therefore my vote is don’t go back/stay home with your kids. 😊

  • Like 1
Posted

I only have 2 kids, and I could not have managed this well before the teen years. (I started to say I could not have done it, but I suppose I could have if desperate!). It's okay to know your limits. It's okay to not take every opportunity that comes your way. My kids needed a lot of parenting, lol, and I needed a lot of down time, so my working whilst homeschooling was part-time and definitely did not involve commuting. 

 

  • Like 2
Posted

It sounds like the timing isn't right.  I would tell them no, but let them know that you're available to teach online again, if they decide to do that after all.  (I mean, if you want to.)  Who knows, they might discover that they have more pushback than they think they will.  It seems like even before the pandemic, more and more schools had some online courses available.

  • Like 2
Posted
6 hours ago, Noreen Claire said:

...I hate feeling like I let someone down. Even if I haven't really.

 

Meant very gently (and so you can let yourself relax): It sounds like you are misinterpreting the situation -- your friend is most likely wanting to offer you an opportunity, and letting you, as a friend, have first shot at the opportunity. And even if the friend is in real need of a teacher, if you turn this down, your friend will just move on to the next person on the list, and won't even think twice about it. So you are free to say no with a clear conscience and no stress. 😉

  • Like 9
Posted

If your boss is your friend, then they'll understand that you don't want to do it. And honestly, like Lori just said, they'll simply move down to the next person on the list.

And you don't want to do it. You've already made your decision, that much is abundantly clear from your first comment. The best thing you can do for your friend now is make it official as soon as possible.

  • Like 2
Posted

I just want to say that I understand the ambivalence. When we choose one thing, we are often giving up something else. So, I understand that it’s not an easy decision. I had a different career than I might have if I did not choose to homeschool. I had wonderful years with my children. 

  • Like 2
Posted

Thanks, everyone, for your input.

I talked briefly with grandparents and, even if I wanted to, I would not be able to have regular/reliable/happy-to-help childcare lined up in order to teach in the fall. So, I emailed and said that I could teach online if they left that option open, but that I couldn't teach on-campus.

I'm both relieved and disappointed.

I still feel like I've let them (her) down. And I feel bad that my husband will be the only person bringing in income again.

I was raised Irish Catholic - I excel at guilt!

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