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Grocery shopping is making me resentful and the pandemic is making us weird-JAWM


teachermom2834
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I'm 46 yo and have been married 25 years. In that time I have been the primary grocery shopper/meal planner/etc. For a time this was for a family of six...we are now down to four people living here full time. (dh, ds 18, dd 12, and me). So everyone is old enough to take care of themselves.

Just venting but...

Grocery shopping is making me resentful. I buy food. They eat it. I have to buy food again. There is always both nothing to eat and no where to put the groceries I buy. I grocery shop online. I ask for three days for input on the grocery list and requests. I tell everyone to request meals they can make themselves if I am not cooking for the family. I just picked up $350 worth of groceries and crammed them into my pantry/fridge/freezer. It wasn't easy to make everything fit. Why is that? If my fridge and pantry are that full, how is there nothing to eat? If I bought the wrong food, how come no one can tell me what it is they want? How can there be both nothing to eat and nowhere to put the groceries and no suggestions for what I should be buying differently? I am at the point where I could eat a pb and j sandwich for lunch and dinner for weeks just not to deal with grocery management. 

And on the pandemic is making us weird- dh is working from home full time which is no doubt a big part of the issue. He has become increasingly particular about food. I feel like dh (perhaps all of us) have become alot less flexible since we are home and not flexing to participate in life with other people. Dh has one brand and flavor of yogurt he eats every day at 10:00 am. He did not do this when he was working out of the home. He somehow got through the work day without his 10:00 exact brand/flavor yogurt.  He also would take a sandwich to work or grab lunch out sometimes with co-workers. I know for a fact he would eat wherever co-workers wanted to eat even if it didn't fit his mood. I know that if he went to the work cafeteria and they were out of whatever he usually got he would find something else and go about his day. Yet, here at home, it seems he needs to have a hot meal for lunch (sandwiches not cutting it anymore), and he needs to eat whatever he is craving. There isn't much of just making do with what is available and it is making me crazy.  Now, dh is not being a jerk to me about this. When we don't have what he wants he goes out to the store and gets it. He doesn't blame me. Yet, it is still making me crazy that I spend three days making a grocery order, unload and cram stuff into every crevice of storage, and then he heads back out in search of his missing items. 

They didn't have his yogurt today. So he is out running around town getting his yogurt. I know that shouldn't bug me but there are four other kinds of yogurt in the fridge. LOL. And he is getting Worchestershire sauce because I forgot that and if he has to cook a burger without Worchestershire sauce he might die. Also in search of the exact cheese he needs if he eats a sandwich. I'm telling you- if he was in a restaurant or they had catering at work he would eat a sandwich with whatever cheese it had on it. He is not picky at all out of the house. 

I know everyone being home all the time is a big part of it. And general mid life grouchiness I suppose, 

Did I mention dh is now going to work from home permanently??? 

Anyways- this is just a vent. I'm just so sick of grocery shopping. It feels like such a thankless task and I just never want to get groceries again. So, I realize that is not exactly rational. And my husband is driving me insane. I also realize I shouldn't be mad at him when he goes and gets what he needs. It isn't like he is expecting me to cater to him. 

Ugh. I really want to just go buy myself food and make myself food and let everyone else figure it out. But that really won't work because whatever they bought would annoy me too! And they would spend too much money. And dh would probably have to go out to the store five times to get everything he needs. 

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Sounds like controlling food has become a way of controlling and ordering life when there are lots of changes going on.

Agreeing with Carol in Cal. that a trip to the store makes for a nice outing and change of scenery.

Sorry for all the frustrations OP! 

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I feel your pain. I tried pre-planning meals for a week at a time. That works for DS and me. He will contribute ideas, and then eat what is planned. However, a certain family member will not participate in planning meals. When I do make what is planned, sometimes he will eat it as long as it is ready the exact moment that he wants to eat. If not, he will fix himself something to eat and not eat what I cooked.

I have solved some of my frustration by cooking and planning just for myself and DS. I do feel obligated to feed the kid. Usually there is enough food prepared for everyone, but sometimes there is not.  Everyone is invited to suggest items to purchase, but if someone is happier eating ramen noodles, then I give up worrying about it.

 

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Controlling small things that we can indeed control when the whole world is in turmoil is one way of dealing with anxiety. I am not saying that your DH is like this, but, considering that he is controlling the flavor of his yoghurt and cheese, it seems like it makes him feel better when he does so. If I were you, I would not buy those items any more and let your DH go out and buy them for himself - and while he is at it, hand him a list of the things that he could pick up at the store! Since he is going out anyway, might as well put it to good use! Let him go out if he wants to use the yoghurt as an excuse to do so 😉

 

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There's few safe enjoyments available these days. Food is one of the few things. And while I am sick and tired of cooking yet another meal, eating is the only fun thing in some days.

Sounds like your DH is glad to have a tangible reason to get out of the house. I can totally relate.

Edited by regentrude
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Oh, and another thought: working from home leaves people without a lot of their daily routines, and that feels very destabilizing. It sounds like your DH has found a new routine, the yogurt at 10, to replace a myriad of workday related habits that have been taken away and to give himself a small bit of structure. 

I understand that it's frustrating to you, but perhaps it helps to see where this is coming from?

 

Edited by regentrude
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We have been experiencing similar issues. 

For 25 years we built the family expectation that I was the grocery shopper and cook. That's how we set up our family life all those years ago, and it worked well for many years. Now, not so much. 

With pandemic, people working from home, unemployment, kids home from college trying to keep up with studies and social life - everything is messed up. And as Regentrude says, food may be one of the few safe outlets for enjoyment for a lot of people.  People latch on to things - like a specific yogurt - and it becomes a need.  If I don't have some Dutch-process cocoa to stir into my coffee every morning, the day feels ruined by 9am. Consequently, I make damn sure I do not run out of my cocoa. 

I think the pandemic and resulting change in routines is messing up a lot of people.  We have been going through "there's nothing to eat" when the place is bulging at the seams with food. Because people want what they want, when they want it.  Right now, more than ever. 

 

 

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14 minutes ago, marbel said:

I think the pandemic and resulting change in routines is messing up a lot of people.  We have been going through "there's nothing to eat" when the place is bulging at the seams with food. Because people want what they want, when they want it.  Right now, more than ever. 

Yes, absolutely. I have a full fridge and pantry, but some days I am absolutely sick of my own cooking and do not have the energy to try out recipes. I would love, love, love to have a meal that I don't have to prepare. (And no, there is no decent restaurant in this town to make takeout an option)

Edited by regentrude
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I feel your pain. 

DH is SAHD, and has historically been the grocery shopper and meal planner. 

I have taken on the role of grocery shopper for the last year, because I work outside the home and I have fewer risk factors, so it make sense both in terms of limiting exposure and risk.  And now I am the only one in the home who's immunized, so it's a no brainer that I am the shopper.

But I hate it.  Of course, I buy the wrong thing.  Or can't find the right thing.  Or the right thing isn't available, so I sub something else and it's the wrong thing.   Shopping in person during a pandemic is unpleasant.  And I'm doing this in addition to a more than full time job.  I do not want to hear complaints!!!!

 

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I always feel.like I don't have enough/the right food, even after I've just done a weekly shop and spent a lot on groceries. 

And we're not in a pandemic. Life is normal for me. So that bit of it, yeah, I think it's just a weird thing that happens, especially when you shop online. It takes so much time, but then it's gone so fast!

It's such a relentless task.

I honestly thought it was a me-fail, and not something that happened to others. I have no suggestions, just sympathy for the sheer annoyingness of it. 

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We are ordering more takeout than we ever have in an effort to support our local restaurants and I order grocery delivery online which I find so simple and easy, but I’m still sick of cooking and thinking about food. I’m not sure why that is. 

 

 

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Absolutely agree.  My 4  kids are older now (youngest in college and one comes home for extended periods of time due to working remotely now), and shopping and meal planning are SO SO much easier now with fewer people at home.  I love when the whole family is together, but the stress of feeding and shopping for everyone (and having room in the refrigerator/freezer) is absolutely overwhelming for me.  Two of my sons are always trying to gain mass and are huge eaters and it's just so hard to feed them.  Then there's everyone's different food preferences/diets to deal with.  I just hate it.  And it's so much work making shopping lists, doing all of that shopping (and having to go to multiple stores to find everything), and then all the cooking, prep, clean up...blah.  

Pre-Covid, we discovered all-inclusive vacations - best vacations ever.  I never had to think about food at all.  Everyone was taken care of and happy.  Best vacations ever and worth every penny.  Before that, I hated vacations because the food issue stressed me out so much.  I never want to travel with my family again unless it's an all-inclusive place.  

I eat the same thing every day.  Easy peasy.  No thought required.  

 

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15 minutes ago, Kassia said:

Pre-Covid, we discovered all-inclusive vacations - best vacations ever.  I never had to think about food at all.  Everyone was taken care of and happy.  Best vacations ever and worth every penny.  Before that, I hated vacations because the food issue stressed me out so much.  I never want to travel with my family again unless it's an all-inclusive place.  

 

We went on a cruise to Alaska with my in-laws and I expected to love AK but not the whole cruise thing, especially since my youngest has a tricky food intolerance. Turns out, cruises have so many food options that it was much easier for her to find great food than in a restaurant, and it was a massive relief for me. Aside from being with my in-laws it was the most relaxing vacation I'd had since kiddos!

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I have given up trying to figure out shopping and cooking for everyone.  We've started making shopping at the warehouse grocery store a whole-family event.  We move through each section of the store together, and everyone picks up whatever they want.  I encourage them to buy in bulk, if it's something they already know they like, so we don't run out of it soon.  Once we get the food home, everyone helps put things away, and we each eat whatever we want for supper - leftovers, cereal, canned soup, a frozen pizza, or some other super easy food.  It's so nice not to have to put together a meal for everyone after shopping!  The rest of the time, we may eat meals together, or we may make our own food when it's convenient for us.  No one stresses much about food here anymore, because we all have stuff we want to eat.  I'm still the only one who thinks to put out raw veggies for munching throughout the day, even though others want them, too, but other than that there's no problem.  

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I have been exactly where you are since about late October. Every week I ask what people want (and I make them be specific-don't just say chips if you mean Ruffles wavy Sour Cream and Onion, I'm not a mind reader!). But still, by the next day everyone's acting like there's nothing to eat, or sighing about this or that item that I didn't buy. So frustrating. 

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1 hour ago, Thatboyofmine said:

I need more details on this.... where?  Company?

 

We went with Club Med, but there are so many options!  Cruises and resorts.  You can google all-inclusive vacations and I bet a bunch of results would come up.  What was even better than all the choices, was the quantity of food.  When my sons eat at a restaurant, they are still hungry after.  They are always always hungry.  At an all-inclusive, they could eat as much as they liked.  And drinks were included!  

 

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I get up at 5am every Saturday so that I can be at the grocery store when it opens at 6am.  Then I spend at least an hour in the store, usually have to bag my own groceries at the check-out, and then I drive home and put everything away while my dear family members are still sleeping!  

I can't shop during the day because I would have to take my daughter and she refuses to wear a mask.  And I'm afraid to shop at night after my husband gets home because of creepy people who are often hanging around the store/parking lot.   Early morning is actually the best time for me because there aren't many customers and I'm really tired of people commenting about what I'm buying.  There are more stockers in the aisles than other shoppers when I'm there and thankfully they're very friendly! 

I don't trust other people to do my shopping so the shopping services don't appeal to me.  

And I'm not kidding...this week the store was out of my dh's preferred yogurt and I had to prepare him for the substitute!  

When I was a kid, Saturday was my favorite day of the week...cartoons and maybe even a bowl of sugary Quisp cereal.  But now all I can say is Saturday sucks!  

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I'll just step in to say I'm sick of shopping and food prep so I I agree with you. All of my children are old enough to fend for themselves, so I took a break.  I haven't cooked in days.  I feel so much better.  My kids fended for themselves from the freezer for two days (there is always food to cook), the older teens took turns making dinner for two days, my youngest made plain cupcakes, and they all pooled their money and got a contactless pizza delivery together tonight.  I realized I need to do this more often. It's good for them.

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I so hear you. DH makes runs to get out of the house. And I was just telling him there’s no point in me cooking. Unless it’s takeout no one eats it anyway. 
 

I was considering going on kitchen strike but I’m not sure anyone would notice. Tonight they’re going for Mexican food. 

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I get your frustration, every part of it. I find I go through waves of resentment about all the housework stuff over different periods of time. The fact that it's all me (but why) and that everyone else seems so entitled. You're in a worse situation though with everyone at home all the time.

And the talk about all-inclusive holidays really helped me understand why in the past I loved going on holidays but now it's 'meh'. Because I still have to cook and clean (usually we're staying at someone's holiday house). I spend the whole holiday worrying about cleaning up the place afterwards, and what to cook that won't hurt their appliances. Maybe we can save up to go to one of those places with kids clubs and buffet meals. 

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25 minutes ago, melmichigan said:

I'll just step in to say I'm sick of shopping and food prep so I I agree with you. All of my children are old enough to fend for themselves, so I took a break.  I haven't cooked in days.  I feel so much better.  My kids fended for themselves from the freezer for two days (there is always food to cook), the older teens took turns making dinner for two days, my youngest made plain cupcakes, and they all pooled their money and got a contactless pizza delivery together tonight.  I realized I need to do this more often. It's good for them.

A couple months ago I said I was going on strike but I didn’t stick to it. I really want to make everyone else responsible one night a week at least. My 18 yo, who is a fantastic kid, does like to feign helplessness in the kitchen. I told him I didn’t care what it was. He could make Hot Pockets. If he shopped, put them in the oven, and then cleaned the pan I would be content! Lol. 
 

My 12 yo dd actually does some cooking and is really good about taking care of herself and dh can too. I certainly am not cooking for everyone every night. But I do make sure there are groceries and something for them to cook that is easy and they like. It’s the planning any shopping and discussing what is available or what I am cooking. Just so much fuss over food with everyone here all the time! Grr. 

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@teachermom2834 Can you see if someone else would like to take over meal planning and making the shipping list for a couple of weeks? (Could be two separate people) And let everyone know you also will be splitting cooking duties up? 

For example, the food-is-important-to-me people in our family work together to meal plan evening meals for the following week after looking at the schedule. My two older girls at home pick one meal to cook. DH usually has at least one meal he does all the prep & cooking for.

Lunches are fend-for-yourself here as are most breakfasts. Shopping list is made based on what is needed for the planned meals and what we need for breakfasts or lunches. If it isn't on the list, you are out of luck for the week.

If there is a blank on the supper schedule--of which there were two last week--you get a Mom Surprise. I dump a bunch of stuff from the freezer into the slow cooker or instant pot & you get soup or whatever I throw together from what we have on hand. If you don't want to risk that (see the Food-is-important-to-me people from two paragraphs ago), you plan something ahead of time.

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This is partly why I started the threads about if it’s safe to eat through our covid hoard and asking people where they store their extra food.

I’ve always hated the whole shopping thing, but now that I have a hoard of food to rotate through, it’s just awful. I can spend an hour after a grocery run rotating the old food to the front and putting the new food in the back and stuffing things in the 2 fridges and chest freezer (oh, the chest freezer is a bear sometimes...things slip down to the bottom). 

I calculated everything, and making the grocery list, checking for what we already have on hand, ordering the food online, going to pick it up and putting it away is 5 hours of work.  And when I do the shopping myself instead of ordering it online, it’s 7 hours of work.  And now there’s the extra hour of rotating and stuffing things into the freezer.

And heaven forbid if you want to get out the hamburger patties that are at the very bottom of the stuffed chest freezer. 

 

My family is the same as yours: there’s nothing to eat. Yet everything is overflowing.

 

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I am so sorry.  I'm not dealing with this - my family has been great. When food first became scarce I told them that we had freezers and shelves full of food, so they may not get exactly what they want at any particular time but they would not go hungry.  Our stores are good now and we get carryout to support local business twice a week.  They have actually been a lot of fun to cook for, and even now that things are somewhat back to normal they're appreciative of almost anything cooked and eat DIY leftovers or frozen/packaged stuff without complaint (although they probably would if it went on for days instead of just some lunches).  Spouse does go to the store every few weeks to load up on heavy things for him like energy drinks and soft drinks and he usually brings home some junk food, but it's nothing excessive and he grabs anything that I might need to save me a few more days before I need to go again.

But...mom and MIL have dealt with a lot of this.  They get complaints, their spouses suddenly don't like foods that they've eaten for 20 years but they want the same few foods way too often.  When stores were low on stock, they'd complain because they were out of milk chocolate bars, because they couldn't fill their craving with semisweet chocolate chips.  At one point one grandma got complaints about homemade candy because the chocolate was made using chocolate chips, while the store-bought would have been milk chocolate.  Even pre-pandemic, both found that when their husbands retired husband suddenly needed to go to the grocery store every 5 minutes despite having rarely shopped prior to retirement.  We're not sure if it was boredom, anxiety, control issues...but they were mightily annoyed.  Having basically run their kitchens for 50 years, they can't figure out what is up.  We have a running joke that my family drives me nuts 1000 ways, but at least they are easy to feed, although I have to make shocking amounts of food because I have growing sporty tweens/teens.  I hope this gets better for you - I've got no advice but I think you have plenty of company.  

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I’m wondering if your dh goes bc he wants to get out of the house, too. When my kids were all little, I’d do this. Dh would come home for lunch ( that he’d make on his own—we don’t do family lunch) and I’d meet him at the door and tell him I was running to the grocery store. He’d tell me how we could solve whatever food need without me going. I finally got him to understand I needed to go to the store so I could be alone!  I used to run into town when we stayed at my in-laws in the country whenever anyone needed anything just to have something to do. 

Otherwise, I am bored of cooking, too. In my house, though, dh cooks two nights a week and the kids rotate who cooks on Sunday night. Dh does the shopping. So I am a bit of a baby about it all. 

If I were you ( and admittedly I don’t know your special circumstances) I would eat down whatever is filling your pantry and frig.  I have a decent canned goods/dry goods store in my basement, but we use it all. My frig is packed after shopping, but pretty empty the day before (better now that I feel better picking up a few things later in the week.)

Could you be caring too much what they think?

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20 minutes ago, theelfqueen said:

Having everyone at home for every meal is exhausting .... even when we order out, I have to coordinate everyone's orders. 

Yes, I know I’m feeling a funk when even the takeout order seems complicated. Who has mental space to remember which kid eats tomatoes that week? 

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6 minutes ago, freesia said:

I’m wondering if your dh goes bc he wants to get out of the house, too. When my kids were all little, I’d do this. Dh would come home for lunch ( that he’d make on his own—we don’t do family lunch) and I’d meet him at the door and tell him I was running to the grocery store. He’d tell me how we could solve whatever food need without me going. I finally got him to understand I needed to go to the store so I could be alone!  I used to run into town when we stayed at my in-laws in the country whenever anyone needed anything just to have something to do. 

Otherwise, I am bored of cooking, too. In my house, though, dh cooks two nights a week and the kids rotate who cooks on Sunday night. Dh does the shopping. So I am a bit of a baby about it all. 

If I were you ( and admittedly I don’t know your special circumstances) I would eat down whatever is filling your pantry and frig.  I have a decent canned goods/dry goods store in my basement, but we use it all. My frig is packed after shopping, but pretty empty the day before (better now that I feel better picking up a few things later in the week.)

Could you be caring too much what they think?

I think I'm just grumpy! No one is actually complaining. They are all too nice for that. I think I have always just managed the meals and now I am tired. So they still look to me to let them know what is happening for dinner or what is available for lunch. If I'm not making something I'll tell them what is in the freezer that they can help themselves to, etc. But I'm just tired of it. The pandemic is just making us weird. Dh is getting weird about food and I'm getting weird about grocery shopping. Dh really can't win. I don't want him looking to me to guide his meals but I would get mad at him if he ate something I was planning to use for another meal. So he'll ask...but then I'm mad I'm having to discuss food again! LOL. And in his mind when he runs out to the store to get whatever is missing he is solving the problem himself. He just isn't solving it the way I want it solved, darn it!

One thing we have always done to keep expenses in check is for me to plan meals carefully and use up leftovers and we only get takeout or eat out for a special occasion. So it really is every single meal that is being managed and on a budget. I think this has made it harder and having some room in the budget to grab takeout a couple times a week or to let some leftovers go unused without feeling guilty for wasting food would help tremendously. We could do that. It would be money well spent at this point I think. 

My poor family really doesn't know why they are annoying me so much. It's just that I'm grumpy enough that them needing to eat anyting at all is pretty annoying!! LOL. We really need to get out of the house and change things up a little. 

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53 minutes ago, Garga said:

This is partly why I started the threads about if it’s safe to eat through our covid hoard and asking people where they store their extra food.

I’ve always hated the whole shopping thing, but now that I have a hoard of food to rotate through, it’s just awful. I can spend an hour after a grocery run rotating the old food to the front and putting the new food in the back and stuffing things in the 2 fridges and chest freezer (oh, the chest freezer is a bear sometimes...things slip down to the bottom). 

I calculated everything, and making the grocery list, checking for what we already have on hand, ordering the food online, going to pick it up and putting it away is 5 hours of work.  And when I do the shopping myself instead of ordering it online, it’s 7 hours of work.  And now there’s the extra hour of rotating and stuffing things into the freezer.

And heaven forbid if you want to get out the hamburger patties that are at the very bottom of the stuffed chest freezer. 

 

My family is the same as yours: there’s nothing to eat. Yet everything is overflowing.

 

We only have our kitchen fridge/freezer.  Thanks for making this point.  I always think we should get more, but it does take more time to take care of then.  I hadn't thought of that.  Can you go shopping only 2 times a month?  

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5 minutes ago, mommyoffive said:

We only have our kitchen fridge/freezer.  Thanks for making this point.  I always think we should get more, but it does take more time to take care of then.  I hadn't thought of that.  Can you go shopping only 2 times a month?  

This is when I go 2 times a month.  If I went weekly, then the time would probably be shorter.  But...then I’d have to shop every week!!  NOooooo!

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11 minutes ago, teachermom2834 said:

I think I'm just grumpy! No one is actually complaining. They are all too nice for that. I think I have always just managed the meals and now I am tired. So they still look to me to let them know what is happening for dinner or what is available for lunch. If I'm not making something I'll tell them what is in the freezer that they can help themselves to, etc. But I'm just tired of it. The pandemic is just making us weird. Dh is getting weird about food and I'm getting weird about grocery shopping. Dh really can't win. I don't want him looking to me to guide his meals but I would get mad at him if he ate something I was planning to use for another meal. So he'll ask...but then I'm mad I'm having to discuss food again! LOL. And in his mind when he runs out to the store to get whatever is missing he is solving the problem himself. He just isn't solving it the way I want it solved, darn it!

One thing we have always done to keep expenses in check is for me to plan meals carefully and use up leftovers and we only get takeout or eat out for a special occasion. So it really is every single meal that is being managed and on a budget. I think this has made it harder and having some room in the budget to grab takeout a couple times a week or to let some leftovers go unused without feeling guilty for wasting food would help tremendously. We could do that. It would be money well spent at this point I think. 

My poor family really doesn't know why they are annoying me so much. It's just that I'm grumpy enough that them needing to eat anyting at all is pretty annoying!! LOL. We really need to get out of the house and change things up a little. 

I “liked” this comment with the laughing emoji because there’s just so much truth in it and it made me laugh. I’m doing a lot of the same things you are, and my dh has been merrily heading out to the grocery store on his own, which somehow raises my hackles.

We’re getting a little weird right alongside you.

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Count me as another who’s sick of food prep and grocery buying. And really just food in general. But also, am I the only weird one who’s wondering what this coveted yogurt is? 😁


also, @marbel tell me more about this cocoa habit of yours—what kind exactly? What do you do with it—spoonful in black coffee? 
 

My burning questions are making me think I’m probably bored with food as well 😂

Edited by mmasc
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17 minutes ago, teachermom2834 said:

I think I'm just grumpy! No one is actually complaining. They are all too nice for that. I think I have always just managed the meals and now I am tired. So they still look to me to let them know what is happening for dinner or what is available for lunch. If I'm not making something I'll tell them what is in the freezer that they can help themselves to, etc. But I'm just tired of it. The pandemic is just making us weird. Dh is getting weird about food and I'm getting weird about grocery shopping. Dh really can't win. I don't want him looking to me to guide his meals but I would get mad at him if he ate something I was planning to use for another meal. So he'll ask...but then I'm mad I'm having to discuss food again! LOL. And in his mind when he runs out to the store to get whatever is missing he is solving the problem himself. He just isn't solving it the way I want it solved, darn it!

One thing we have always done to keep expenses in check is for me to plan meals carefully and use up leftovers and we only get takeout or eat out for a special occasion. So it really is every single meal that is being managed and on a budget. I think this has made it harder and having some room in the budget to grab takeout a couple times a week or to let some leftovers go unused without feeling guilty for wasting food would help tremendously. We could do that. It would be money well spent at this point I think. 

My poor family really doesn't know why they are annoying me so much. It's just that I'm grumpy enough that them needing to eat anyting at all is pretty annoying!! LOL. We really need to get out of the house and change things up a little. 

😂 yeah, I get grumpy like that, too!

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2 minutes ago, mmasc said:

Count me as another who’s sick of food prep and grocery buying. And really hair food in general. But also, am I the only weird one who’s wondering what this coveted yogurt is? 😁


also, @marbel tell me more about this cocoa habit of yours—what kind exactly? What do you do with it—spoonful in black coffee? 
 

My burning questions are making me think I’m probably bored with food as well 😂

I’ve been thinking about this chocolate in coffee since I read it. I want to hear, too. Maybe I need a weird pandemic food preference to liven things up here. “Math cancelled! We are out of cocoa and I have to go get some now!”

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28 minutes ago, teachermom2834 said:

I think I'm just grumpy! No one is actually complaining. They are all too nice for that. I think I have always just managed the meals and now I am tired. So they still look to me to let them know what is happening for dinner or what is available for lunch. If I'm not making something I'll tell them what is in the freezer that they can help themselves to, etc. But I'm just tired of it. The pandemic is just making us weird. Dh is getting weird about food and I'm getting weird about grocery shopping. Dh really can't win. I don't want him looking to me to guide his meals but I would get mad at him if he ate something I was planning to use for another meal. So he'll ask...but then I'm mad I'm having to discuss food again! LOL. And in his mind when he runs out to the store to get whatever is missing he is solving the problem himself. He just isn't solving it the way I want it solved, darn it!

One thing we have always done to keep expenses in check is for me to plan meals carefully and use up leftovers and we only get takeout or eat out for a special occasion. So it really is every single meal that is being managed and on a budget. I think this has made it harder and having some room in the budget to grab takeout a couple times a week or to let some leftovers go unused without feeling guilty for wasting food would help tremendously. We could do that. It would be money well spent at this point I think. 

My poor family really doesn't know why they are annoying me so much. It's just that I'm grumpy enough that them needing to eat anyting at all is pretty annoying!! LOL. We really need to get out of the house and change things up a little. 

It is beyond annoying that you can't just feed people once a week, and then take the next 6 days off from thinking about it. 

I remember this one day when my kids are little and I was clearly high on oxytocin and thinking about how privileged I was, and how fulfilling it was to make them vegetable soup. 

Since the oxytocin wore off, I've been grumpy too! 

But seriously, where are the 21st C food pills. Feast Sunday, good pills in the week would be MUCH better.

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18 minutes ago, mmasc said:

Count me as another who’s sick of food prep and grocery buying. And really just food in general. But also, am I the only weird one who’s wondering what this coveted yogurt is? 😁


 

Oikos Triple Zero Strawberry Greek yogurt. He successfully secured four servings today so that plus the one in there will get us through the week. Next weekend will again be yogurt quest. 

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1 minute ago, teachermom2834 said:

Oikos Triple Zero Strawberry Greek yogurt. He successfully secured four servings today so that plus the one in there will get us through the week. Next weekend will again be yogurt quest. 

Well, at least this week is secured 😂

also, I haven’t had that yogurt and it’ll probably be in my cart next week just because 😆

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1 minute ago, mmasc said:

Well, at least this week is secured 😂

also, I haven’t had that yogurt and it’ll probably be in my cart next week just because 😆

As long as you don’t live in my town and take my dh’s yogurt! 😆 

Really I don’t think there is anything special about this yogurt other than it is what he is used to. Sometimes I’ll want a yogurt but I don’t want to eat it and generate a yogurt crisis. He would NEVER tell me I can’t eat the yogurt. I just don’t want him crossing state lines looking for his yogurt. So I buy a different kind for myself although I’d be perfectly content to eat his. 
 

Like I said. We’re getting weird. 

 

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Also a contributing factor to getting weird is that we have so much time on our hands. We used to be so busy all weekend all the time with kid stuff. Between the kids growing up and the pandemic we really have nothing else we need to be doing. So we really have so few demands on our time, a yogurt quest really is possible. So I guess the spare time is contributing to making us weird. 

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8 hours ago, teachermom2834 said:

Hmm...if it is a reason to get out of the house and not that he will not be able to function with the wrong cheese it is way less annoying!

If it’s Tillamook cojack or Stoneybrook yogurt, I’m forced to side with him... This is likely why DH and I co-shop; we’re picky and whiney.

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8 hours ago, teachermom2834 said:

Hmm...if it is a reason to get out of the house and not that he will not be able to function with the wrong cheese it is way less annoying!

I guess grocery shopping annoyances are more tolerable for me as my husband is the only one not picky about food. DS16 only likes Trader Joe’s brie. He won’t complain if it’s sold out but he won’t eat Costco brie. I have had “stockpiles” of our picky eaters favorites for years.

Ever since shelter in place started, my husband would ask if I need to do grocery runs almost daily. He does enjoy grocery shopping but he is not picky about food so we go buy groceries together else there would be food wastage. 

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4 hours ago, teachermom2834 said:

Oikos Triple Zero Strawberry Greek yogurt. He successfully secured four servings today so that plus the one in there will get us through the week. Next weekend will again be yogurt quest. 

This is dh's yogurt, too.  We buy it at Costco, two cases at a time. ETA: I think the case has a few different flavors in it.  It was on sale when we were there last Tuesday. 

Edited by klmama
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13 hours ago, regentrude said:

Yes, absolutely. I have a full fridge and pantry, but some days I am absolutely sick of my own cooking and do not have the energy to try out recipes. I would love, love, love to have a meal that I don't have to prepare. (And no, there is no decent restaurant in this town to make takeout an option)

Husband is about to order from an excellent Afghan//Guyanese restaurant that send meals by courier nationwide for reheating at home.  We `normally don't go out often, as we'd rather eat really good food rarely than mediocre food often (and we are both decent home cooks) so this is the equivalent of our occasional restaurant splurge.  We haven't eaten out in more six months - we ate in a gastro-pub garden between the surges last summer.

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11 hours ago, mmasc said:

Count me as another who’s sick of food prep and grocery buying. And really just food in general. But also, am I the only weird one who’s wondering what this coveted yogurt is? 😁


also, @marbel tell me more about this cocoa habit of yours—what kind exactly? What do you do with it—spoonful in black coffee? 
 

My burning questions are making me think I’m probably bored with food as well 😂

So the cocoa thing is simple. I mix about, I don't know, 2 teaspoons unsweetened dark cocoa (just Hershey's special dark, nothing fancy 'cause I'm both cheap and broke) and a little half and half into a small amount of hot coffee in a cup, stir madly with a fork to disperse the cocoa, then add more coffee to fill the cup. Some sludge settles at the bottom over time so if I don't drink the cup quickly, I have to stir again. (Or drink it out of my Contigo which I can seal and shake, but I don't like using that at home.) 

With the cocoa, I don't feel the need to add any sweetener and I use less half and half. It adds a richness to the coffee-drinking experience that makes it more interesting than drinking what is basically hot flavored water.  (Similarly, I prefer Indian chai, with honey and milk, to "regular" plain tea.)

I don't understand how hot cocoa mixes, such as Swiss miss, disperse so well and don't settle into sludge. I am missing an emulsifier I guess. Maybe sometime I'll look into it more, but my method works OK for me for now. And it's not completely true that my day is ruined if there is no cocoa but it does make the day better. Oh, and natural cocoa, the healthier stuff, doesn't do it for me.

 

 

Edited by marbel
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I'm not the food person here, but all the extra time at home has given some people way too much opportunity to overdo food stuff.  One adult here buys the food (orders delivery), and another is basically the food police, trying to make sure everyone eats the way she thinks they should eat.  I'm the third adult, and I mostly hide from all of it except where it creates conflict with my kids (which is kinda often kuz my eldest usually hates food).

We have way too many fights over things my parents would never have even discussed when I was 14.

So yeah, I really need people to go back to work.

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