nm

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[prairiewindmomma]

If you've all (you and your husband) have been vaccinated (and grandfather should be too at this point, right?), then I would feel confident interacting with everyone. 

 

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[prairiewindmomma]

Yeah, I think so.

And, in reality, that is what I think things are going to look like at the end of this summer. Dh's work is planning to return to in-building stuff. If I'm looking at the trajectory in our state correctly, dh and I will likely both be vaccinated, and the kids won't be.  He'll be going to work, masked, and coming home to us. We are planning on having him change his clothes and shower (clothes going straight into the washer so I don't have to handle them) and then we aren't going to mask around each other in our house. It also looks like ds who is a university student will be in the same boat--headed out to in person classes while the youngers (who are high risk in their own right) will continue to be unvaccinated.

We will continue to keep our vitamin D up, practice good hygiene, and otherwise be practical and responsible people.  If someone becomes symptomatic, they'll be isolated in our homes with a HEPA filter. But dh needs to earn money, ds needs to finish his degree so he can go earn money, and this is the reality we're in.

 

 

 

[KungFuPanda]

I think of all the people involved, you, GFIL, and SIL's househould, you have the least amount of say in the matter.  You've done all you can.  Whether or not the other parties move in and out of your space is really up to them.  I don't think any reasonable person would expect you to ban GFIL from your house.  

[ktgrok]

Also, given what I think is your husband's job, and my knowledge of Covid in people in that job....they were not being cautious. At all. As in, entire departments with not a mask in sight. They were not catching it as part of their job, but in interacting with coworkers. Riding in cars with them, eating with them, etc, unmasked. So as soon as one got it, it ran through the workforce like wildfire. So I think that sense of invincibility really does play into the high rates.  Not saying there isn't increased risk in that the ones they interact with won't be masking - but yeah.....him taking precautions may make him less likely to get it than the average person in his job. 

Edited February 25, 2021 by ktgrok

[prairiewindmomma]

16 minutes ago, ktgrok said:

Also, given what I think is your husband's job, and my knowledge of Covid in people in that job....they were not being cautious. At all. As in, entire departments with not a mask in sight. They were not catching it as part of their job, but in interacting with coworkers. Riding in cars with them, eating with them, etc, unmasked. So as soon as one got it, it ran through the workforce like wildfire. So I think that sense of invincibility really does play into the high rates.  Not saying there isn't increased risk in that the ones they interact with won't be masking - but yeah.....him taking precautions may make him less likely to get it than the average person in his job. 

This has not been the experience locally, fwiw.  They are wearing N95s here, and socially distancing when they can.  Even when they had to be deployed of sorts with firefighting crews to manage evacuations and were camping away from home, they limited groups and interactions so that exposure was limited.

Frankly, ktgrok, when I look at your local news stories (I have family near you), I am straight up horrified. FL has not been a paragon of social distancing, masking, or otherwise taking precautions.  When a member of the public saw someone in that category of position unmasked at a rural coffee shop in my state, it went viral and an investigation was opened. (We have state masking mandates.)

[Katy]

I’d have him shower when he gets home and then forget about it. Low risk. 

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[ktgrok]

10 minutes ago, prairiewindmomma said:

This has not been the experience locally, fwiw.  They are wearing N95s here, and socially distancing when they can.  Even when they had to be deployed of sorts with firefighting crews to manage evacuations and were camping away from home, they limited groups and interactions so that exposure was limited.

Frankly, ktgrok, when I look at your local news stories (I have family near you), I am straight up horrified. FL has not been a paragon of social distancing, masking, or otherwise taking precautions.  When a member of the public saw someone in that category of position unmasked at a rural coffee shop in my state, it went viral and an investigation was opened. (We have state masking mandates.)

I'm not sure if I'm upset to have my state's sucky behavior verified (as in, I'm not crazy, it is dumb behavior) or gratified that not everywhere is like this. Both, maybe?

Oh, and we have a county wide mask mandate....and yeah, never seen someone in that position wearing a mask yet in public. 

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[ktgrok]

Just now, BaseballandHockey said:

I'm sorry this has been your experience, but it also feels a little like victim blaming.  That you're making an assumption that if something goes wrong it will be his fault.  

I don't really want to continue to speculate about his work here though, just because I want to protect his privacy on this matter. 

Oh, no, that wasn't what I meant at all! I meant that I'd worry less than statistics would indicate, since your husband is so careful. But even then, I do get he is at higher risk, no matter how many precautions he takes, since he can't control the behavior of others. I'm sorry that came out that way. I can delete it. 

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[catz]

Just now, BaseballandHockey said:

I make him shower anyway.  He got exposed to lots of gross stuff before covid.  The kids and I aren't going to take precautions from him in our house.  

But I guess my question is, if he was your brother or BIL, would you let him in your house?  Would you let him around your kids?  The decision to let him around my own kids is easy.  I feel like that decision is harder.  

If I were vaxed, yes.  If I were not vaxed, probably not honestly.  But I would probably allow spaced outdoor get togethers as the weather improves if everyone was healthy.  

Didn't Fauci say new  recommendations are coming  soon for those who are vaccinated?  I think the science on this will evolve pretty quickly.  Hopefully things keep looking positive.  

[Katy]

I’m letting my mother and grandmother (who isolate) come without masks when they are fully vaccinated. My FIL doesn’t isolate at all and I’ll let him come with a mask after being vaccinated. One of my children is high risk. 
 

I’d leave it up to SIL and not worry at all. 

[dsmith]

It sounds like you are seeing these people now? Are all of you staying home otherwise except when you get together? Just trying to determine current risk levels I guess... We don't see anyone unmasked that doesn't live with us. None of us are vaccinated as of yet. We are very, very careful - most of our shopping is done online with delivery or curbside pickup, and we do occasional trips to Walgreens or our local vegetable market when they aren't busy. My sil has issues with us not letting her into the house and requiring masks, distancing, etc. but her and her family go to the gym, eat out, travel, visit friends often unmasked and no distancing. We are a multigenerational household with most of us in the high risk group. My mother-in-law will most likely be vaccinated first and I know my sil will be pushing for her to come to their house unmasked, but that will not be happening until all of us are vaccinated. Once all of us here are vaccinated we will let them in the house unmasked. They are willing to take that risk for themselves, so their choice. I would feel more comfortable if they were also be vaccinated when that time comes because the vaccine isn't a perfect guarantee, but the rest of the family is ok with the risk. I'm not in fear of being in that 5%, just a bit wary I guess.

[AmandaVT]

I would feel fine mingling with a vaccinated person if I were not vaccinated. Vermont, which has been very cautious through the whole pandemic, just gave guidance that vaccinated people can visit w/ one non vaccinated person at a time, without masking/distancing. And travel restrictions between states were just lifted for vaccinated people. 

From what I can see, recent data is showing that transmission rates are also cut with vaccinations. https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/can-a-vaccinated-person-still-spread-the-coronavirus/2021/02/24/4c360814-76f8-11eb-9489-8f7dacd51e75_story.html

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[AmandaVT]

5 minutes ago, BaseballandHockey said:

Why one person?  Are they not making an exception for the same household?  

 

Read it wrong - one household at a time! 

[Loowit]

I would not feel comfortable with it, but I tend to be overly cautious.  Until there is hard data saying that vaccinated people do not spread the virus, I will go with the assumption that they can.  My DH and DS are both high risk, but not allowed to be vaccinated.  In our state you have to have two co-morbidities to be in any of the currently revealed phases.  We are still in the future to-be-determined phase.

I think ultimately we have to make the choices we are comfortable with using the information available to us.  Sadly sometimes this means not seeing loved ones, or having to make choices of which ones we can see.  My ILs wanted to get together with us after they are done with their vaccinations in a month, but we aren't going to be comfortable with that.  We will meet up outside while masked and distanced, but not inside unmasked.

[wathe]

7 hours ago, BaseballandHockey said:

One question we have is whether we'll continue to see them.  If we do, does leaving DH home make sense?  Or do we assume that if he's contagious, the kids and I are too?  There's also the question of whether we take precautions like masks, distancing, and outdoors with them.

 

I don't think leaving DH at home makes sense.  I think it makes more sense to treat the family as a unit.  If he's a transmission risk to your SiL, then he's also transmission risk to your kids (even higher risk to your kids because of time and proximity), who then become a transmission risk to SIL.  If he's not a transmission risk, then neither are the kids. 

I do masks, distancing and outdoors with everyone outside my nuclear family, and we treat our whole nuclear family as a unit with respect to risk of exposing others.  If I'm a transmission risk, then the kids and DH will be most likely to get it from me, and therefore they are a risk to others - maybe even more of a risk than I am, because their transmission risk is almost certainly higher than mine.

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[ktgrok]

3 minutes ago, BaseballandHockey said:

Thanks,

Do you have a feel for how much vaccination reduces the likelihood of you being a transmission risk?

I believe early numbers are around 70%. 

[wathe]

30 minutes ago, BaseballandHockey said:

Thanks,

Do you have a feel for how much vaccination reduces the likelihood of you being a transmission risk?

My feeling is quite a lot, and I speculate the data are going to show something like 90% risk reduction.  Nursing home resident covid numbers here have plummeting since vaxed a month ago. 

Either way, I think it makes the most sense to treat the family as a unit.

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[wathe]

20 minutes ago, BaseballandHockey said:

What about the idea of having my GFIL and FIL  visit us while living with her?  They'll be vaccinated.   

I can see my SIL being worried about the remaining 10% risk.  I feel like adding even 10% of DH's job would still be way higher than now when the only place anyone in that family goes is to her OB. 

But if my GFIL comes then it's 10% of 10% that he'll take it back?  So 1%?  and if it's both then 2%

Or is my math really bad?

It's hard because we just don't know.

I don't think that a straight probability*probability works, because if DH transmits to the kids, their transmission risk kids->GFIL is relatively much higher than DH->GFIL transmission.  It's probably a low risk situation either way.  I'd still be masking, outdoors and distancing - but that's me - for us these are easy things that we can do to lower our risk even more. 

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[wathe]

12 minutes ago, BaseballandHockey said:

I'm not getting this part.

I don't understand, if the only place the kids can get covid is from DH, how they'd be more likely to be contagious than DH.

 

They'd be less likely to catch it from DH, I agree (because his transmission risk is lower).  But if they catch it, then their transmission risk to others is baseline, not reduced.   They will amplify the virus and shed just as much virus, no matter who they've caught it from.   And you might not know they've got it until they've already passed it on.

Edited February 26, 2021 by wathe

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey

[wathe]

 

Our province tried an Iron Ring strategy around nursing homes, back when Pfizer was the only vaccine we had, and it couldn't be transported to nursing homes.  The idea was to vaccinate all the staff, to form and IRON RING of vaccinated people to keep the virus out and away from the vulnerable residents.  It didn't work.  The virus snuck in, and once in, it spread like wildfire.

I think, that while there are obvious differences between your home and a nursing home, the principle still applies - relying on a vaccinated person to keep the virus away from unvaccinated people can only go so far, and if the virus sneaks in, you'll have spread among unvaccinated family members and might not realize it until it's too late.

Edited February 26, 2021 by wathe

[Drama Llama]

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Edited May 8, 2021 by BaseballandHockey