SpecialClassical Posted January 19, 2021 Posted January 19, 2021 Do your families interact on FB if they don’t have a relationship otherwise? My sweet, narrow minded mother-in-law posted an inaccurate, opinionated meme today. I wanted to correct it, but I save my battles, usually for racial issues, and do so privately. So I let it go as I do most of her posts. She just doesn’t think things through. My not-so-sweet opinionated mom rarely posts on FB, but has started getting a bit more active lately. You see where this is going. My mom answered with a snippy comment and then M-I-L had a friend that answered my mom with a snide comment. They all live in the same small town area. I’m so glad we moved away. Lol We have a family gathering coming up. Earlier this year we were sent an article to read that strongly insinuated we couldn’t be faithful Christians if we didn’t vote for Candidate X. Fun times, people. Fun times. 9 Quote
fairfarmhand Posted January 19, 2021 Posted January 19, 2021 I am not on fb. That said, I know I have relatives who have hidden other relatives on fb. 1 Quote
SpecialClassical Posted January 19, 2021 Author Posted January 19, 2021 7 minutes ago, fairfarmhand said: I am not on fb. That said, I know I have relatives who have hidden other relatives on fb. My kids have hidden my MIL! 3 Quote
fairfarmhand Posted January 19, 2021 Posted January 19, 2021 Just now, SpecialClassical said: My kids have hidden my MIL! My dd has hidden my dad. I have a relative who has hidden her own mother. 1 1 Quote
BakersDozen Posted January 19, 2021 Posted January 19, 2021 (edited) 26 minutes ago, SpecialClassical said: Do your families interact on FB if they don’t have a relationship otherwise? Nope. I'm not friends with my mom, mil, my siblings, my dh's siblings, or our young adult dc on FB. Not only are we not friends, I've blocked all of them. Which is fine...I/we all prefer it that way. If my mom and mil were "connected" on FB in any way they'd be banned right quick, I'm sure. Yikes. I don't welcome drama into my life any more than absolutely need be; having family as friends on FB would not be good. Edited January 19, 2021 by BakersDozen 1 Quote
Shoeless Posted January 19, 2021 Posted January 19, 2021 (edited) My MIL and dad used to be fb friends, but MIL unfriended him because I-dont-know. It's for the best, because they are both kind of wild-cards, and I would rather they not team up and make plans together, (they did once, and it was not great for me). I blocked my uncle because he is forever posting hateful, racist, sexist, fake news garbage. I also blocked my mother's husband. He's awful for different reasons. Oh, I forgot: MIL and SIL unfriended me. SIL also unfriended DH, (her brother). We have no idea why. Edited January 20, 2021 by MissLemon 1 Quote
Katy Posted January 19, 2021 Posted January 19, 2021 I unfriended my MIL and block every 3rd party meme source my FIL shares. 3 Quote
SpecialClassical Posted January 20, 2021 Author Posted January 20, 2021 1 minute ago, BakersDozen said: Nope. I'm not friends with my mom, mil, my siblings, my dh's siblings, or our young adult dc on FB. Not only are we not friends, I've blocked all of them. Which is fine...I/we all prefer it that way. If my mom and mil were "connected" on FB in any way they'd be banned right quick, I'm sure. Yikes. I don't welcome drama into my life any more than absolutely need be; having family as friends on FB would not be good. You can bet I’m seeing the wisdom in that, particularly with the extended family. Quote
Shoeless Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 3 minutes ago, SpecialClassical said: You can bet I’m seeing the wisdom in that, particularly with the extended family. If I had it to do over again, I would have 2 fb accounts: one for family only, and one for friends, with zero overlap. 3 1 Quote
Gobblygook Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 (edited) I have hidden a large portion of my extended family on FB over the past year due to beliefs that Covid is fake and rabid political beliefs. I’m really not sure how to interact with these people IRL once I actually see them. Edited January 20, 2021 by Gobblygook 1 Quote
SpecialClassical Posted January 20, 2021 Author Posted January 20, 2021 16 minutes ago, Gobblygook said: I have hidden a large portion of my extended family on FB over the past year due to beliefs that Covid is fake and rabid political beliefs. I’m really not sure how to interact with these people IRL once I actually see them. My people act so different in real life in general. I worry, but usually they tone down their rhetoric in person. Quote
1234 Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 Dh has unfriended my mom and we both unfriended one of his sisters. I have come to seriously hate social media. My Twitter and Instagram are under fake names so I have no family on them. FB is the only one and I would be much happier with it if I could unfriend my own mom but I know it with hurt her. 1 Quote
Carrie12345 Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 My aunt blocked me because I had posted about my grandmother’s death A WEEK after the fact, after I made sure it was okay with my mother. And the obituary had been published. But I didn’t check with her first. Whatever, lady. Quote
gardenmom5 Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 my condolences. I did have some contact with my mother's missouri relatives. (the pettiness got to me.) I was very glad my grandparents moved away (due to the war, and lots of jobs at boeing.) 1 Quote
alisoncooks Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 I've hidden tons of family on FB. My grandfather, MIL. Actually, I've hidden most of DH's extended family, lol. No one has time for that nonsense. 4 Quote
PeterPan Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 Unfollow them. Or take a FB break for 6 months. Or "snooze" them for 3 months. I went through and unfollowed scads of people a few years ago. Haven't missed them. I populate my FB with things that are actually interesting, lol. Then with COVID I started checking it just once a week, and that's even better! 2 Quote
Spryte Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 No FB here, no drama. That is a can I won’t open. I would hide those people, snooze them, whatever you call it. Life is too short for drama. Can you take a break from FB? 1 Quote
SpecialClassical Posted January 20, 2021 Author Posted January 20, 2021 1 hour ago, Joker2 said: Dh has unfriended my mom and we both unfriended one of his sisters. I have come to seriously hate social media. My Twitter and Instagram are under fake names so I have no family on them. FB is the only one and I would be much happier with it if I could unfriend my own mom but I know it with hurt her. Yes, when I was on Twitter I used a fake name do I wouldn’t have to deal with the drama. Quote
SpecialClassical Posted January 20, 2021 Author Posted January 20, 2021 20 minutes ago, Spryte said: No FB here, no drama. That is a can I won’t open. I would hide those people, snooze them, whatever you call it. Life is too short for drama. Can you take a break from FB? I’ve tried, but people do events and group messages that I need to see. Plus, I need to be aware of what my adult friends and family are posting so I can have a heads up with what my teens are seeing, especially my child with FASD. Right now I’m taking a break from posting anything except local lost dogs, food bank days, etc. That helps. 😊 3 Quote
Spryte Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 Just now, SpecialClassical said: I’ve tried, but people do events and group messages that I need to see. Plus, I need to be aware of what my adult friends and family are posting so I can have a heads up with what my teens are seeing, especially my child with FASD. Right now I’m taking a break from posting anything except local lost dogs, food bank days, etc. That helps. 😊 Yeh, I can see how you are stuck. I’m so sorry - it must be stressful! I hope you can set it up so you don’t see the stressful parts. No one needs that! 1 1 Quote
SpecialClassical Posted January 20, 2021 Author Posted January 20, 2021 40 minutes ago, PeterPan said: Unfollow them. Or take a FB break for 6 months. Or "snooze" them for 3 months. I went through and unfollowed scads of people a few years ago. Haven't missed them. I populate my FB with things that are actually interesting, lol. Then with COVID I started checking it just once a week, and that's even better! Snoozing is the best! I was wondering where my one conspiracy friend went and was impressed that she stopped posting so much, and then I remembered I snoozed her. Haha! 3 Quote
SpecialClassical Posted January 20, 2021 Author Posted January 20, 2021 1 hour ago, Carrie12345 said: My aunt blocked me because I had posted about my grandmother’s death A WEEK after the fact, after I made sure it was okay with my mother. And the obituary had been published. But I didn’t check with her first. Whatever, lady. Wow, that’s nuts. My MIL used to post before the people involved in the event did and didn’t ask. We forgave her and moved on. Your aunt needs a chill pill. Quote
ksr5377 Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 I have unfollowed everyone I am friends with on FB and am only using it as a way to see group events. 1 Quote
SpecialClassical Posted January 20, 2021 Author Posted January 20, 2021 Just now, ksr5377 said: I have unfollowed everyone I am friends with on FB and am only using it as a way to see group events. So if you unfollow them do you get notifications if you are tagged for an event or a pic? Quote
PeterPan Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 15 minutes ago, SpecialClassical said: So if you unfollow them do you get notifications if you are tagged for an event or a pic? Yes. You aren't *blocking* them, only unfollowing them for your feed. 2 Quote
ksr5377 Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 1 hour ago, SpecialClassical said: So if you unfollow them do you get notifications if you are tagged for an event or a pic? Yes I do. It also allows me to go to their pages and see all their posts if I'm in the mood. So if I think I can eye-roll at a few of my cousins posts in order to see pics of their kids etc. I go ahead. And the best part is, they don't even know it! They can still see everything I post, which is a family picture a few times a year and a generic ask for people to buy popcorn from my son's scout troop once a year. People I'm close to just know that I don't really communicate through FB. If something really noteworthy is posted by extended family my sisters usually clue me in. 4 Quote
elegantlion Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 I tend to snooze members of my extended family on a regular basis. After 30 days they pop back up and, yup, in a few days they're back to posting things that make me roll my eyes. I did see one person start to talk differently about Covid after they caught it. So they're not so bad anymore. 2 Quote
easypeasy Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 5 hours ago, SpecialClassical said: Snoozing is the best! I was wondering where my one conspiracy friend went and was impressed that she stopped posting so much, and then I remembered I snoozed her. Haha! Ha! Same! My kids hid almost all extended family members almost as soon as they joined fb. The crazy aunts and conspiracy-theory cousins would post THE weirdest stuff to their posts, but once they were hidden, the posts stopped (because they'd have to visit their actual page to see their posts, and they'll never bother doing that). During COVID, I thought it might be nice to reach out to some other extended family members I'd ignored when I first joined fb (I keep my friends list purposefully tiny, but was feeling magnanimous and yearning for family). Well, I popped into their public timelines and immediately knew it was a baaaad idea. So, I backed away slowly. lol Right now, I'm just SO THANKFUL that my MIL and my mom never linked together on fb (neither of them have accounts). I cannot even begin to imagine the real life stress that would have caused. omg. I'm sorry, OP. 😳🥴 2 Quote
vonfirmath Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 14 hours ago, fairfarmhand said: I am not on fb. That said, I know I have relatives who have hidden other relatives on fb. I love the "hide for 30 days" aspect of Facebook. I've done that to my cousin twice over the course of the pandemic/;election cycle. We "agree" on many things. But he's so abrasive on the stuff we don't that sometimes I just don't want to deal with it. Quote
alisoncooks Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 I love the "snooze for 30 days", but then I forget I did it and suddenly (30 days later) my feed will be flooded with things I missed. I'm always like "whoa!!! What's going on?!?" Then I send them all back to time out. 1 Quote
HS Mom in NC Posted January 20, 2021 Posted January 20, 2021 My parents and in-laws aren't on FB. I have very extended relatives I haven't met in person on social media and they don't interact much beyond a comment or two here and there. I have no problem unfriending or unfollowing extended relatives (and I have a boatload of them on social media) or other FB friends. I'm not inclined to babysit adults, so I'm not prone to wanting to correct every error I see on the internet. Now I do occasionally post a directly contrary view to a person's posts or on my own wall, but I do it with no expectation whatsoever it will persuade anyone or that others will pile on agreeing with me or that it will go unresponded to by the opposition. I allow contrary posts on my FB page as long as they're not personally attacking anyone. I have no expectation people will be polite or civil either, so there's no pearl clutching on my part. In other words, I'm realistic and don't need to be agreed with. I'm able to emotionally detach from it. I'm capable of scrolling past posts if they would degrade my emotional well being. That's why I don't get upset about social media. It is what it is. People can opt in or opt out. Quote
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