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We keep inadvertently waking each other up during the night, and so we're wondering if a king-sized bed would help.  If you have one, what do you like/dislike about it?  Features we should look for or should avoid?   

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My DH is 6'5" so a King bed is a must for me. My only regret is not getting a California King for the extra length. If movement is the issue tho, upgrading your mattress to something latex or something with a center line (two twins, side by side) might help.

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I’ve only ever had a queen,so I can’t speak from the other side. I don’t think the relatively small increase in space would help us very much.   A better mattress, otoh, might.
Our greatest improvement was deciding years ago to have our own dang blankets. I am the toss-and-turner, and I mangle blankets not only from the tossing and turning, but from finding just the right burrito style, which can vary from night to night... or hour to hour.

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We had a king. DH is a big guy and it really gave us our own space. However, I just switched to a hospital bed (because it raises and lowers the entire bed) and he has a twin xl beside me. It depends why you don’t sleep well. If the reason is because of the other’s movements, then two beds will resolve that. 😉 

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I've been researching mattresses like a crazy lady for weeks. We're planning on upsizing from queen to king ASAP (FWIW, it's a 16" difference). 

Depending on how you're waking each other up (flailing arms vs motion from tossing and turning) you may need a mattress highly rated for motion isolation. 

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We’ve always had a king & recently switched to a split king—two xl twin mattresses. The regular king gave us plenty of room width-wise. And the split king is even better because having separate mattresses means we don’t feel the other person moving around on their side of the bed. Highly recommended if you can afford it.

Regarding bedding if you’re curious...we have twin xl bottom & top sheets & blankets on each mattress, but still share the one king-size bedspread.

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We had a queen size bed for 35 years and switched to king.  So glad we did.  It will require a start up cost of not only new bed and frame but sheets/linens to accommodate that increase in size.  I didn't think a king would make much difference.  IT DOES!  Now if you get a cheap mattress you'll probably still be rolling on the high seas kwim?  🙂   Spend the money for a good mattress, boxspring and frame.  DH and I don't notice the other's movements.  I did buy bigger pillows for our bed.  Don't have a headboard yet.  Will get one but it's not a priority as we're having house exterior painted and other projects that require money.  We're planning to move this calendar year too!

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We have a King Tempurpedic.  It wasn't cheap - $4000 included mattress, box spring, mattress pad in 2012.  Dh wanted it for his back.  I am a light sleeper and neither of us are awakened by the tossing and turning of the other now.  It helps dh's back.  The only negative is that it is heavy so if you want to just lift it to sweep under the bed, it takes 2 people.  We hired help for the heavy stuff when we moved.

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You asked for features.   Well, you'll have to plan a trip to a mattress store and experiment the beds.  Not sure about the co19 thing and how that works.  We bought our mattress this time last year before the pandemic hit so we were "testing" out the mattress sets in the store.  I'm "assuming" these stores have protocol in place for that, but I don't know. 

I was absolutely set on Beautyrest Black series.  We went to the store and eyeballed one that was marked down.  THEN "it" happened. I overheard a customer who had just walked in and she carried on about another manufacturer/brand. The store  had one of those on display too.  

The Beautyrest hit all the bells and whistles.  It has an AWESOME cooling feature in the event you're near menopause LOL!

But, we tried that other brand (other customer) and it was fantastic!  We ended up buying a Kingsdown Chardonnay which is firm.  

Decide if you want innerspring, foam or "purple".  We didn't care for Purple and dh didn't want memory foam.  Kingsdown is manufactured in our home state of NC but I bought it because it was made well, there was attention to detail and it was very comfortable.

It's personal preference.  What interests dh and I may be different for you and your dh so that's why anyone will tell you to -

gather opinions
test out at store
research reviews

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I've had a king bed for years.  (different types of mattresses - my favorite has been latex foam.)  Love it.  when little kids would climb in bed with us - they'd lay crossways . . . one of us would get feet the other would get a head.

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3 hours ago, alisoncooks said:

 

Depending on how you're waking each other up (flailing arms vs motion from tossing and turning) you may need a mattress highly rated for motion isolation. 

Alison is right but I have to add a caveat. Mattresses like memory foam that are meant to absorb movement so it doesn’t transfer lack responsiveness to springiness. When we were reading online, it was mentioned occasionally that these same mattresses inhibit ... um... springiness that is useful to making tea. Just a consideration. 
😂 

We ended up going with the Saatva air model that is like Sleep Number but it is made of organic cotton and latex and was less expensive. That said, as they are saying Covid is slowing them down, the production of the mattresses has not yet begun (3-4 weeks later) so I have no IRL experience. 

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We love our Cal King.  We picked out the mattress by ordering one that was the same as at a place we stayed for a week that we had liked.  When it arrived I was shocked at the depth of it.  New, good mattresses are far thicker than the old standard sizes.  We got a Bucky board instead of a box spring so that it wouldn’t be too tall to get into without jumping or a step.  

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My husband is 6'4 and neither of us is small, but we have found that we don't sleep any better in a king than a queen.  We have a queen, but have often vacationed in places where the bedroom has a king.  We did find that getting a Purple mattress was a game changer, though.  We may hear the other one get up, but we don't feel the bed move so we're more likely to sleep through it.  

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1 hour ago, BlsdMama said:

Alison is right but I have to add a caveat. Mattresses like memory foam that are meant to absorb movement so it doesn’t transfer lack responsiveness to springiness. When we were reading online, it was mentioned occasionally that these same mattresses inhibit ... um... springiness that is useful to making tea. Just a consideration. 
😂

We ended up going with the Saatva air model that is like Sleep Number but it is made of organic cotton and latex and was less expensive. That said, as they are saying Covid is slowing them down, the production of the mattresses has not yet begun (3-4 weeks later) so I have no IRL experience. 

Yes! Funny enough, many of the mattress review sites rate mattresses on whether or not they inhibit the "motion of the ocean." 😉  Also, I initially thought I wanted a memory foam to reduce disturbances from DH, but after reading looooots of reviews, I'm leaning toward a hybrid. One, because we're heavier and it's recommended. But, two, I tend to change my sleep position throughout the night, and memory foam may make it difficult to turn or flip (feeling stuck in the mud, they say). Many people actually need some spring to shift positions comfortably. 

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We bought a king and a mattress with really good motion isolation when my kids were babies, but it has held up and has absolutely helped us sleep better. Dh isn't that big a guy, but it's still nice to have space and not feel the tossing and turning - for both of us.

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We briefly thought about a king size when we finally bought a real headboard/bed frame in 2019 after 28 years of marriage. We stayed with queen but have a good mattress. Since the bedroom is now also my office where I work 6.5 hours a day, I'm glad I have the extra space, which is the main reason we stayed with a queen. Maybe we would have decided differently if we had a huge bedroom and wanted to use up extra space. We're also pretty average in size.

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We have always had a king-sized bed.  What we have now is actually two twin-XL Tempurpedic.  At first we used two twin bottom sheets--now we just use a king bottom sheet over the two twins.  It was nice when the kids were younger that there was room for them to crawl in and watch a movie or spend a lazy Saturday morning (that was an advantage to us, for some people it might be a disadvantage).  The main thing I would consider is whether your bedroom size will accommodate a king.  

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We bought a king sized mattress when we had our first child, since we coslept.  It's kind of awesome, since even now I wind up with a teenager in my bed a couple times a week.  Queens are definitely too small for three adult sized people and at least one cat, but the king works okay for that.  (It is, however, too small when BOTH kids try to get in our bed now.)

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I posted this in another post -- so I plagiarized myself:

Seventeen years ago we needed a new mattress and I'm too embarrassed to tell you how much we spent (clearly we had no idea how expensive my boys, Lambo and Ferrari, would be).

Barely a night goes by that I don't give thanks that we went way outside of our budget and bought the best sleeping experience. We've returned home from hotels happy to be back to our mattress b/c it feels better than a nice hotel's mattress.

We went from a queen to a Cal King -- with a pillow top which, I think, is what absorbs all the movement from each person. So you won't feel each other rolling around.

Downside to Cal King that I didn't know about:

Comforters, sheets, mattress pads and so on are expensive because they're for a much bigger bed. (I get around it now by just having a super cozy bed. She's no super model, but I love my comfy bed. (I had to give up on buying pricey comforters and bed skirts and mattress pads etc.)

Of course, I have a mattress pad, but it's seen better days. It should be replaced. We also get Cal King sheets from Costco and we don't have a zillion pairs of sheets -- we have two. (I wash my sheets every Sunday.)

Also if you like a beautiful four-poster bed or a headboard. . . that will be serious money too.

The other downside is that if you guys like to cuddle. . . it's really easy to get out of the cuddle-habit when there is all that luxurious space.

Another downside -- when you move to a new town the movers will glare at you when they move the Cal King. You might have to tip them extra. And taking it upstairs is a bear.

We don't spend on cars or jewelry or clothes. But we spent a ton on our Cal King -- and 17 years later we still think it was worth it.

HTH,

Wendy

 

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On 1/8/2021 at 2:48 AM, klmama said:

We keep inadvertently waking each other up during the night, and so we're wondering if a king-sized bed would help.  If you have one, what do you like/dislike about it?  Features we should look for or should avoid?   

Yes!  A king size bed is such a huge difference from a queen.  It’s like having your own bed. And you truly have your own space, without feeling like you’re bumping into dh.  When we stay in hotels, I am reminded all over again how much I love our king 🙂. We actually went and tested mattresses together (it was advice given to us).  We laid on the mattresses in the store, pretending to sleep, roll over etc to see if we could feel the other persons movement or if it would make us sink in the middle or something.  I know you’re not supposed to keep a mattress this long, but it’s been 20 years and I still love it 🙂

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For years we had a queen sleep number.  I *loved* it and couldn't feel any movement when DH moved around.  DH kept his side super soft and eventually grew to hate the thing.....but refused to adjust the firmness.

When FIL passed we inherited the king sized bed and bought a new mattress for it (cause we had no idea how old the ILs mattress was)  We got a traditional mattress with a large memory foam topper.  The size difference was amazingly awesome.  

But I didn't like the mattress when we bought it and I still don't.  If I could justify the expense of replacing with a king sleep number I would.  But I can't justify that after overspending on the mattress I have that we only bought like 3 yrs ago.  So, I think the mattress can really make as much of a difference as the size of the bed.  

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On 1/8/2021 at 7:23 AM, guilfordlake said:

We’ve always had a king & recently switched to a split king—two xl twin mattresses. The regular king gave us plenty of room width-wise. And the split king is even better because having separate mattresses means we don’t feel the other person moving around on their side of the bed. Highly recommended if you can afford it.

Regarding bedding if you’re curious...we have twin xl bottom & top sheets & blankets on each mattress, but still share the one king-size bedspread.

For people who have the 2 twins some questions.

Do you have anything that keeps the 2 twins together?  Do they move? 

Do you have a king box spring or 2 twin box springs? 

I haven't priced twins, but it seems like that is cheaper? 

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We’ve talked about upgrading to a king but never have. We’ve had a full size bed the entire 24 years we’ve been together.🙃 We did recently get a foam mattress topper because we were waking each other up with movement and it fixed our problem.

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On 1/10/2021 at 8:40 PM, mommyoffive said:

For people who have the 2 twins some questions.

Do you have anything that keeps the 2 twins together?  Do they move? 

Do you have a king box spring or 2 twin box springs? 

I haven't priced twins, but it seems like that is cheaper? 

It might depend on the manufacturer. We have a Tempurpedic adjustable bed so it's two twin xl bases and two twin xl mattresses. It came with two straps to keep them together, but the guy who set the beds up said they usually only use the straps when the beds are on hardwood floors. He didn't put the straps on ours (we have carpet) and the beds haven't budged. In fact, I tried to push them back against the wall (he left a gap between the head of the bed and the wall) and I couldn't do it. I had to lift the bases to move them.

While they are technically 2 twin mattresses, they sell them as a king-sized bed, so it's still priced as a king. I guess you could buy two twins...I don't know if it would be cheaper that way.

Edited by guilfordlake
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Only king for us!  First was a waveless water mattress.  It had a chamber down inside with baffled pillows of water/spongy stuff.  It was a lot like our more recent mattress, a Tempurpedic type, I think maybe Soma?  Anyway, the best thing about both of our mattresses is that they did.not.move!  When either person gets into or out of bed, if they are careful with the covers, the other person cannot feel it at all.  Really wonderful feature, and sometimes we have a hard time sleeping in a hotel on a normal spring mattress because of the movement.  

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2 hours ago, Familia said:

@guilfordlake, is there a noticeable gap or ridge between the two mattresses?  Or does a mattress pad keep you from feeling the seperation?

We use 2 twin mattress pads so I don't know what it would be like if you used a king-sized one, though you certainly could. You will feel it when you're in bed if you move that direction, but you won't see it when the bed is made if you use a king comforter or quilt.

And if you have adjustable beds like we do, and you each raise your side to a different incline, you'll feel that if you roll over to that side of the bed.

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The best part of a king bed for us has been the fact that we each have our own mattress. DH likes very firm and I like medium to soft. With a king bed, we were able to get two XL twin mattresses instead of one king mattress. We also don’t feel each other move around. I’m glad we made this decision a few years ago. 

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2 hours ago, Familia said:

@guilfordlake, is there a noticeable gap or ridge between the two mattresses?  Or does a mattress pad keep you from feeling the seperation?

We have a foam connector piece between the two mattresses and a king size mattress pad over the whole thing. It’s a little noticeable, but it isn’t annoying at all. 

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35 minutes ago, TechWife said:

We have a foam connector piece between the two mattresses and a king size mattress pad over the whole thing. It’s a little noticeable, but it isn’t annoying at all. 

Do you know where you got that, or what it is called? 

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On 1/10/2021 at 9:40 PM, mommyoffive said:

For people who have the 2 twins some questions.

Do you have anything that keeps the 2 twins together?  Do they move? 

Do you have a king box spring or 2 twin box springs? 

I haven't priced twins, but it seems like that is cheaper? 

No - they do not move. The bed frame keeps them in place.

We have one king box spring.

I don't know - we didn't price a king size mattress.

Remember these are Extra Long Twin mattresses, not regular twin mattresses.

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2 minutes ago, mommyoffive said:

Do you know where you got that, or what it is called? 

It's called a bed bridge. I am pretty sure that this is the one we have:

https://smile.amazon.com/Ruili-Converter-Fastener-Connector-Included-Non-Slip/dp/B0828RT794/ref=sr_1_19?crid=5F7C25M2I20F&dchild=1&keywords=king+bed+bridge&qid=1610563316&sprefix=king+bed+bridg%2Caps%2C158&sr=8-19

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2 minutes ago, TechWife said:

No - they do not move. The bed frame keeps them in place.

We have one king box spring.

I don't know - we didn't price a king size mattress.

Remember these are Extra Long Twin mattresses, not regular twin mattresses.

Do you have to get Extra Long Twin Mattresses?   It sounds like a regular twin mattresses don't have the length. 

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40 minutes ago, TechWife said:

We have a foam connector piece between the two mattresses and a king size mattress pad over the whole thing. It’s a little noticeable, but it isn’t annoying at all. 

Yup, this is what we should have done. I sleep completely differently from dh and his side is a terrible swoop while mine is almost like new.

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1 minute ago, mommyoffive said:

Do you have to get Extra Long Twin Mattresses?   It sounds like a regular twin mattresses don't have the length. 

Yes, two twin XL = king. One twin XL=prince.

Edited by PeterPan
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14 minutes ago, mommyoffive said:

Do you have to get Extra Long Twin Mattresses?   It sounds like a regular twin mattresses don't have the length. 

Yes, you do. That is the only thing you have to get that size though. Everything else is king size - the mattress cover and the sheets fit over both with no problem.

 

Edited by TechWife
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