Jump to content

Menu

I am so angry!!


math teacher
 Share

Recommended Posts

I'm a first grade teacher, and today was Professional Development. It was on Zoom, and the afternoon session was a different Zoom session. I started trying to get online about 5 minutes before time to start and the computer message read "Class has not started-page refreshes every 5 seconds" or something like that. I watched the page refresh and finally decided to try a new tab. This time I was able to get in and get Zoom going. When it started up, I heard a teacher singing the first part of "The Wheels on the Bus". Then the instructor started in on me about being late, and that I would have to sing the first few bars of any song I chose. I went through my reasons for being 3 minutes late, but he would have none of it. I told him I wasn't a singer, he offered to sing with me, told me the other lady had to sing and I did too. I finally caved and sung the opening bars of "Hallelujah." 

I feel violated, but am I overreacting?

  • Sad 13
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am not a teacher, but due to Covid have participated in and facilitated more zoom meetings this past year than I ever care to again.  Unfortunately, this seems to be a sad reality of our current situation.  So many people are losing their common civility and professionalism.  It. is. ridiculous.

Edited by Excelsior! Academy
  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sorry the instructor did that.  That makes me mad for you!  First, he should have listened to you when you were explaining what happened.  Second, I don't believe in pressuring people to perform on the spot...he should have given people warning/prep time.  What a snot.

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

If the session has a post session review you leave that in the feedback. It was manipulative and unprofessional. If there is no review form, then forward your comments to the person's supervisor. You'll probably get an apology and he'll get a lesson.

I've been doing some other professional development webinars (from companies) and they're mixed, with some decidedly less than professional. 

  • Like 9
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, happysmileylady said:

I will say........I have been in teaching workshops and so on, where singing or otherwise performing/roleplaying is part of the workshop.  I don't think it's like completely bizarre to have someone who teaches 6 and 7 yr olds singing.  

Doing it as "punishment" for being 3 minutes late is dumb.  But it's not like Kindy and 1st grade teachers don't sing with students often.  

If they choose to.  It is not a job requirement.

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, happysmileylady said:

I will say........I have been in teaching workshops and so on, where singing or otherwise performing/roleplaying is part of the workshop.  I don't think it's like completely bizarre to have someone who teaches 6 and 7 yr olds singing.  

Doing it as "punishment" for being 3 minutes late is dumb.  But it's not like Kindy and 1st grade teachers don't sing with students often.  

I do sing in class-I even dance along with Jack Hartmann. But being made to do it with my peers listening as punishment was over the line.

  • Like 9
  • Sad 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

13 minutes ago, Amethyst said:

Wow. Someone tried to treat you like a first grader! Very embarrassing and uncalled for! Unprofessional. I’d be upset too. 

this is exactly what I thought when I read this!  So unprofessional.  And I don't think anyone should be forced to sing if they don't want to.  I'd be really upset and angry.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, happysmileylady said:

If participating in a workshop is a job requirement (and they so very much are for teachers.....especially on professional development days) and singing/role playing/performinging are part of said work shop......that would translate to a job requirement, no?

It's not required for teachers to teach their kids using song.  Certainly teachers could get through an entire career spanning decades and never sing anything ever (not even the star spangled banner or the school fight song or the Christmas play song, etc etc.)   But......it would be incredibly difficult.  

Singing should not have been a requirement of the workshop. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, Junie said:

You are not overreacting.  I am so sorry that this happened to you.

When I told my dh about what happened to you, he said that he hopes that there is an instructor evaluation at the end of the course.

There is, and I haven't filled it out yet because I didn't want to write something I would regret. I will probably go to the website tomorrow and fill it out. Thanks to you and your dh for understanding.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I would have reacted in a strong manner.

Either I would have flatly refused, and laughed him off if he insisted, or I would have sung an entire Cole Porter song.  Probably Begin the Beguine.  It’s long.  Both would have been interpreted as a protest.  Correctly.

Seriously, that is unbelievably unprofessional and stupid.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

No, you are not overreacting.

His publicly shamed you after you made every effort to meet the requirements AND he refused to listen to your side of the story. In front of your peers, meaning he was also trying to diminish your professional stature with co-workers.

He has serious anger management and control issues. IMHO.

I'd do a hell of a lot more than end-of-course eval. I'd send him a letter and cc whomever. But, I'm feisty at times.

Edited by Happy2BaMom
  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Punishment for being late?  What a waste of time!  How unkind!  That shouldn't be done to any student of any age. 

Stuff like that makes me angry because for some students they'd love the chance to have the spotlight and for some students just the threat of it happening to them could cause deep anxiety.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

OP, I read that you were asked to sing as a punishment for being late.  AKA publicly shamed.  Shaming of a subordinate by a person in power is harassment  (Your instructor is in a position of power here).  It's absolutely inappropriate.  This needs to be dealt with, in writing. 

If the instructor uses shaming tactics on other teachers like this, imagine what he does to children!

If there is an issue with chronic tardiness (which it doesn't sound like there is here), then the appropriate place and time to deal with that is  at a perfomance review, privately.  Not by by publicly shaming!

 

  • Like 8
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree you are right to be angry.

I disagree with the variety of previous posters that this should be thought of as 'treating you like a child' -- no one should treat children like that. If you felt humilliated, imagine how little children experience this kind of thing. It shouldn't happen to anyone of any age.

  • Like 9
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, happysmileylady said:

That's completely dumb.  It's not like you were that late, and it's not like all the tech issues going on are not well known a million times over.  I mean, there are commercials that are totally based on the tech issues going on.

 

Having said that....All they asked you to do was sing a song a little bit of a song.  Dumb....but not worth a kerfluffle over to me.  

I can’t sing in tune to save my life.  I would have been super embarrassed.  I thought we were passed the era of shaming people for dumb stuff

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, happysmileylady said:

That's completely dumb.  It's not like you were that late, and it's not like all the tech issues going on are not well known a million times over.  I mean, there are commercials that are totally based on the tech issues going on.

 

Having said that....All they asked you to do was sing a song a little bit of a song.  Dumb....but not worth a kerfluffle over to me.  

I think that view might depend on singing ability. I really can’t sing in tune at all. While I would not have felt violated, I simply would not have done it.

Hopefully the OP got to do an evaluation of the trainer.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

53 minutes ago, bolt. said:

I agree you are right to be angry.

I disagree with the variety of previous posters that this should be thought of as 'treating you like a child' -- no one should treat children like that. If you felt humilliated, imagine how little children experience this kind of thing. It shouldn't happen to anyone of any age.

I agree 💯

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree that no one should treat children this way either. But we all know it's common to. And in my professional life as a teacher, I was treated like a child or a student by numerous fellow teachers in situations like this. I think some educators find it very hard to figure out how to draw a line between how to work with their peers and how to work with kids. And many of them don't treat kids appropriately either.

  • Like 4
  • Sad 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 hours ago, stephanier.1765 said:

I can't sing a note and would have been horrified to have been forced to do that. It's also horribly unprofessional.

otot - singing off key would be painful to his ears, and rightly deserved.  (my husband and his sister made up a song when they were growing up to make people scream from the fingernails on the chalkboard effect it produced.  It's something worth having available for such times.)

he's acting like a child - very unprofessional.

I also don't think it's worth getting that upset over.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 hours ago, Amethyst said:

Wow. Someone tried to treat you like a first grader! Very embarrassing and uncalled for! Unprofessional. I’d be upset too. 

This is exactly what I was thinking when I read it. Next time perhaps: I apologize for having had some technical issues. I hope this did not delay the meeting. I choose not to participate in the singing. Thank you. May we proceed now?"

I wonder how long they would argue with you. How utterly childish.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm sorry, yes that's stupid. 

While I probably wouldn't have thought of it in the moment, I agree picking a song to express your displeasure at being asked to sing would be fun. 

My top 5:

AC/DC's Highway to Hell 

This is one of my favorites, FYI - liberal use of the F word - I've no more F****s to give. It's a catchy little diddy. 

The Clash's- Should I stay or should I go

Tears for Fears - Mad World - it's so 2020. 

and finally, always a crowd favorite - Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody - you could have inspired a sing-a-long. 

 

None appropriate for first grade, but neither is shaming someone because they're 3 minutes late.  

 

 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I would leave a negative evaluation (in neutral terms that don't identify yourself) such as It isn't professional to shame an adult for a tech issue, especially in front of coworkers. If the instructor is this unprofessional in the beginning of a course I have serious doubts about all the material.  If it is abusive to use shaming in disciplining a child, what is it to do this to a peer?  Does this person even have a teaching license?  It sounds like his class needs supervision, possibly with questioning prior pupils.

 

Then I would go straight to whoever you go to (Principal, District HR), and fill out a formal harassment complaint.  That is what this is, and I really do question if a person with such poor judgment should have anything to do with the field of child education.

 

Disclosure: I had a math teacher in high school that would pull this kind of crap, and my mother didn't believe me until family night, when she tried to pull the same sort of crap on my mother for asking a very innocent question that should have had a very straightforward answer.  My mom complained first to the principal, then to the school board, but she was protected by the union and the shortage of math teachers.  Until 2 years later when she put the daughter of one of the school board members in tears in front of an entire class.  She "retired early" in the middle of the semester under threat of formal complaints of child abuse and losing her license if she didn't retire.   So I probably have a stronger opinion about this sort of bullying than most, but that doesn't change my opinion that someone like this should be on a disciplinary track and not instructing other adults.

Edited by Katy
  • Like 7
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ugh. I'd be angry. Even more so because I would've been flustered and compliant in the moment...but stew about it later. 

In a perfect world, I would've gone all Pink Floyd on that instructor:

{We don't need no education
We don't need no thought control
No dark sarcasm in the classroom
Teachers leave them kids alone
Hey, teachers, leave them kids alone
All in all it's just another brick in the wall
All in all you're just another brick in the wall}

  • Like 7
  • Thanks 1
  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I used to work in a school district admin department and sometimes attended professional development sessions for teachers. This is reminding me of the overzealous director of elementary education. He would stop presentations halfway through to make everyone get up and exercise. I felt so bad for the teachers who were older, out of shape, or otherwise couldn't get up and exercise. Such an ableist thing to do, and I imagine humiliating for some people. I'm sure he thought he was modeling best practices--and maybe that is appropriate in some elementary classes, but it was just generally bad. (he was a generally self-centered man, and if he could do it, everyone should be able to. And he parked in the yellow lines next to handicapped parking spots, which always made me mad). 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't even like having my camera on, much less having to perform!  I don't mind asking questions or presenting if I need to, but being put on the spot, NOPE!  Not even sure I could have thought of a song, although Baby Shark might have been my choice! 😂

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think this unprofessional behavior is a real problem in public education professional development.  It is, hands down, why I left my job as a public high school teacher.

I can at least commiserate with you.  

I once had to sit through a team of administrators performing a rap for the teachers because they thought it might be cute.  I had a pile of real work awaiting me in my classroom.  This was a very long morning...

On another occasion, I  was publicly reprimanded  (it’s been 20 years, and I’m still not over it) for grading papers instead of building with a LEGO set while the administrators ran around the cafeteria screaming at us to hurry and get our shelter built because there was a monsoon coming!  This was supposed to teach teamwork🤷‍♀️.  I was sent to the principal’s office-literally-for grading papers instead 🤣 .  I also happened to be the varsity cheer coach, and focused on teamwork every day.  Teamwork is the reason that none of my cheerleaders were injured in stunts. We didn’t need the LEGOs.

Good Times.  Hang in there.  

  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Katy said:

I would leave a negative evaluation (in neutral terms that don't identify yourself) such as It isn't professional to shame an adult for a tech issue, especially in front of coworkers. If the instructor is this unprofessional in the beginning of a course I have serious doubts about all the material.  If it is abusive to use shaming in disciplining a child, what is it to do this to a peer?  Does this person even have a teaching license?  It sounds like his class needs supervision, possibly with questioning prior pupils.

 

Then I would go straight to whoever you go to (Principal, District HR), and fill out a formal harassment complaint.  That is what this is, and I really do question if a person with such poor judgment should have anything to do with the field of child education.

 

Disclosure: I had a math teacher in high school that would pull this kind of crap, and my mother didn't believe me until family night, when she tried to pull the same sort of crap on my mother for asking a very innocent question that should have had a very straightforward answer.  My mom complained first to the principal, then to the school board, but she was protected by the union and the shortage of math teachers.  Until 2 years later when she put the daughter of one of the school board members in tears in front of an entire class.  She "retired early" in the middle of the semester under threat of formal complaints of child abuse and losing her license if she didn't retire.   So I probably have a stronger opinion about this sort of bullying than most, but that doesn't change my opinion that someone like this should be on a disciplinary track and not instructing other adults.

2dd had a math teacher that moved to the high school from the middle school.  2dd would spend two - three hours on math every night.  (not counting all her other classes.) I finally called the teacher and asked how much homework she thought was reasonable.  She told me if my dd was spending that much time, she was in the wrong math class and needed to be in an easier one.  . . . . . . 

1) 2dd had the highest grade in the class.

2) by the first week of November, - the teacher had taken an "emergency" leave of absence.  (next we heard, she was back teaching middle school.)

They had a revolving door of substitutes for months before they finally got a permanent teacher.   And yeah - it frequently does take angering a school board member - or the superintendent.   

Maybe it's something about math teachers. 1dd had one that was on his "seventh" career! (he say's excitedly at parent night)  He was 35ish at the time.  I was slow to complain  - I waited until Nov.  Apparently there was quite the line ahead of me.  But - math teacher shortage . . . .  1dd generally kept her mouth shut and her head down.  Wrote down the assignment written on the board, went home and read the textbook and did the problems.  She fully ignored him.  ESPECIALLY the day he asked her how he could be a better teacher!  She'd seen how he treated students who made a comment about his teaching style - no matter how accurate they were, or how warranted it was as he was out of line in how he treated students.  He well may have crossed the line into abusive. 

  • Sad 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

21 hours ago, Math teacher said:

 Then the instructor started in on me about being late, and that I would have to sing the first few bars of any song I chose. 

Any song? Those are dangerous instructions. They would have been mighty surprised had you launched into the song that's been topping the Billboard Hot 100 for weeks now 😂

I would have been furious, and not nearly as good of a sport. Absolutely I would mention it as a strong negative on the evaluation, with a strong emphasis on wasting time and being highly unprofessional. 

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 9/29/2020 at 12:32 PM, Math teacher said:

I'm a first grade teacher, and today was Professional Development. It was on Zoom, and the afternoon session was a different Zoom session. I started trying to get online about 5 minutes before time to start and the computer message read "Class has not started-page refreshes every 5 seconds" or something like that. I watched the page refresh and finally decided to try a new tab. This time I was able to get in and get Zoom going. When it started up, I heard a teacher singing the first part of "The Wheels on the Bus". Then the instructor started in on me about being late, and that I would have to sing the first few bars of any song I chose. I went through my reasons for being 3 minutes late, but he would have none of it. I told him I wasn't a singer, he offered to sing with me, told me the other lady had to sing and I did too. I finally caved and sung the opening bars of "Hallelujah." 

I feel violated, but am I overreacting?

No you are not over-reacting.  Would you humiliate a child that way?  I know it has been done often in the past and still is in many cases but that does not make it right.  You did not agree to any such thing in advance I am sure so it was totally out of order.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 9/30/2020 at 12:11 AM, soror said:

I would have been livid too. Grace should be considered considering the known technical issues w/ online meetings. I wouldn't force a child to sing like that either, ridiculous. I hate being put on the spot.

It is very common.  The sad thing many of us may have learnt to sing okay if we had been encouraged and taught rather than just being told how awful we were.

I would have been tempted to sing "the red flag" or 'ballad of Lucy Jordan" though.  

Edited by kiwik
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

The other thing, as a music specialist, is what message does this send about music as a school subject? That singing is embarrassing and humiliating and punishing? What if teachers take this strategy to their classrooms? Trust me, there is no young child who doesn't think they can sing-they learn they can't from the responses of others (and a big part of what I try to teach is that everyone can make music and music is for everyone). 

 

 

  • Like 4
  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...