Son wants to go to college early

[Janeway]

My second son wants to go to college early. His first choice interest is Air Force Academy so I am thinking that won't happen. And if he shoots for other places, he will leave for that college before he finds out if he is able to go to AFA.  This son is not my most academically able offspring. But he also is very social and does not have the struggles his older brother has. When I ask him why, he says he has grown out of this town. His friends are all graduating or moving to pro programs (ballet).  

He is not old for his grade. He only turned 16 at the beginning of summer. If he were to graduate high school (he can easily have enough credits, and we have used a private distance learning program for him), he would be graduating around his 17th birthday. I think he is socially mature, but not academically.  Then again, I might not be the best judge of this. He is working hard, studying for his SAT in early October. 

Any suggestions to what he could do next year, that is different from this year, that could fulfill his desire to move on in life without him having to be graduated? I was thinking he could do dual enrollment for college. I was trying to think of anything that could be more interesting. He would particularly like to go abroad. FYI, we are not wealthy, so ideas like give him a ton of money and send him abroad will not work out.

Edited September 17, 2020 by Janeway

[teachermom2834]

My boys have all felt ready to fly the nest by end of junior year. We have filled that need by doing almost exclusively dual enrollment at the local university. The oldest was very busy with a sport but the second two had jobs. The combination of de on a college campus and working outside the home got us through. 
 

It isn’t the easiest time in my house. I’ll be honest.

[MamaSprout]

We undid a grade skip for dd when she was in 8th/9th grade because of chronic illness. The year she was 9th by age grade she really caught her stride and we let her start dual enrollment. Her friends are also all going to be graduated and gone at least a year before she will. She really wants to graduate at just-turned-17, as well.

What we did was set some benchmarks for what early graduation could look like: SAT/ PSAT score, specific classes that are non-negotiable, and a specific GPA. We went this route because of the field she wants to go into and the merit aid she would need. We've left her at her age grade and would have her apply to schools as an 11th grader. She has plenty of credits, as well. She will be 17 her entire freshman year if she does go away, and we have toured some schools with that in mind.

So, if you son has a goal beyond being "anywhere but here", consider setting some benchmarks for how that would work to graduate a year early. He might surprise you.

[regentrude]

My DD went to college at 17, but by then she had 32 DE college credits at a four year university under her belt.

I would strongly encourage you to have your DS do some DE before jumping into college full time. It will give him a better idea what to expect and also hone those skills that are so important for college success like following a syllabus, managing a schedule of assignments, navigating the LMS, communicating with professors, becoming familiar with the opportunities for academic assistance. I would not consider early college for a student who did not have this experience as a highschooler.

Edited September 17, 2020 by regentrude

[maize]

Have him apply for NSLI-Y--most who apply don't make it but it is worth trying!

https://www.nsliforyouth.org/

[Frances]

There are several different exchange programs for high school students who want to go abroad. He could start researching and applying. Here’s one that several students I know did.

https://www.rotary.org/en/our-programs/youth-exchanges

 

 

[daijobu]

Not to be a Debbie Downer, but I'm not optimistic that colleges will reopen for in person classes next year.  If he flies the coop, it may not be to a campus dorm.  

[Lanny]

I believe the Ballet might be a "plus" for him with AFA.  That to me would imply that his physical conditioning is very good, and, also, possibly that he is a very good "team worker".

And from a very quick glance I took some months ago, the service academies didn't seem to have ACT/SAT scores that are extremely high. They seem to place more priority on Sports, Leadership, Teamwork, etc.

Good luck to your DS!

[SanDiegoMom]

My daughter was ready to move out by summer of 10th grade.  She researched early entrance colleges, (too expensive) and dreamed and ended up just leaving at the usual time.  She definitely felt bored and ready but she wasn't actually ready.  

I would find new pursuits or try dual enrollment to eke out the time.  That's just based on our experience, however. 

[katilac]

On 9/17/2020 at 10:22 AM, teachermom2834 said:

My boys have all felt ready to fly the nest by end of junior year. We have filled that need by doing almost exclusively dual enrollment at the local university. The oldest was very busy with a sport but the second two had jobs. The combination of de on a college campus and working outside the home got us through. 
 

It isn’t the easiest time in my house. I’ll be honest.

Same. We did DE at a local university as well, and it seems like people often aren't aware that's an option and not just community college. Our CC isn't stellar for academics, plus my kids felt it was too small and high school-y (they would have seen half the homeschool group there, lol). Junior year was actually harder, bc we started research and college visits early and, by senior year, they felt like they were moving forward and at least had their ticket to the world.  

23 hours ago, regentrude said:

I would strongly encourage you to have your DS do some DE before jumping into college full time. It will give him a better idea what to expect and also hone those skills that are so important for college success like following a syllabus, managing a schedule of assignments, navigating the LMS, communicating with professors, becoming familiar with the opportunities for academic assistance. I would not consider early college for a student who did not have this experience as a highschooler.

Agree 100%. 

OP, being 17 is not an issue for AFA, but he will be competing against students with a stronger transcript and an extra year to show leadership. Being younger than usual isn't taken into consideration in competitive situations like this, their application is looked at like any other.  So, if he applies early, he may not have all of the years of recommended courses. Has he looked at that list? 

AFA definitely looks at extracurriculars, and I think ballet would be a great and unusual one. Is he continuing with it? If not, all the more reason to not graduate a year early, bc it will be hard to replace. If he is done, he might consider something like teaching dance to at-risk youth (beginning levels possible with Zoom even if not in person). Most competitive institutions like to see continuity of interest. 

If he wants to go abroad next year, can he work for the money this year? That would be two interesting things to expand his world. 

If he can't go abroad, does he have friends or family in another part of the country who would be open to a sustained visit? 

Help him brainstorm, but don't just hand him a lovely list of ideas. If he's ready to be off at college in a year, he should also be ready to investigate alternatives. 

A certain level of angst and restlessness is very typical of the age. 

 

[teachermom2834]

6 minutes ago, katilac said:

 

A certain level of angst and restlessness is very typical of the age. 

 

Agreed! My young adult men kind of drove me nuts their senior years (just starting the year with #3 and it is the same thing). Most kids around here don't leave home so I think they sometimes thought something was wrong with them that they were so restless. I would tell them that it was normal developmentally to feel that way and that I remember feeling that way myself. 

None of my three would have been better served by an early launch, though. I know it can be right for some kids but probably not most. 

[EKS]

On 9/17/2020 at 11:15 AM, Janeway said:

I was thinking he could do dual enrollment for college.

I think that this would be a good compromise as long as you are sure he will be able to do well.  You don't want to saddle him with a bunch of poor CC grades when he is just starting out in college.