(CC) When you disagree with the pastor

[JennyD]

On 6/14/2020 at 7:53 PM, YaelAldrich said:

I'm not a Christian, rather an Orthodox Jew.  But we are now facing a similar issue with the rabbi of our synagogue.  He not only decries the wearing of masks and tells people they shouldn't wear them either but he organized and conducted secret minyans (prayer quorums) throughout our lockdown, which forbade gatherings of 10 or more. He also won't follow physical distancing guidelines nor will let the people supposedly in charge of doing so in the prayer groups from doing so. 

Yael, I am so sorry that you are dealing with this.  This is so, so awful.  I understand all too well that you're not exactly in a world of infinite choices, shul-wise, but I would find this very difficult to get past.  Ever.

Personally, there are certain voices in the Jewish world that I will never again take seriously.  Because the monster came.  It came for us all.  Some people didn't recognize it, because it doesn't have anything to do with intermarriage, or assimilation, or any of those other monsters that we've been warned about for so long. This monster is so tiny that you can't even see it, in fact.  And it said, "So, you say that the preservation of human life takes precedence over everything else?  Well, the price of preserving human life right now is that you have to give up nearly everything that you love, everything that gives your life color and meaning, indefinitely."  And some (most?) Jews said, "Oy, how awful.  All right, we'll try our best."  And some (a few?) Jews said, "That's outrageous!  We can't be expected to do that."

I don't think I believe that this is a divine test, exactly, but it is a test.  It is a test for individuals, for marriages, for institutions.  How do you cope with adversity?  How do you manage in a world of new dangers, incomplete information, and uncertain timelines?  Some are rising to the challenge and some are not.  In the long run, I think there will be many reckonings, small and large, in all sorts of spheres.  But right now I am acutely aware that my children are watching -- and learning from -- me all the time.  

Edited June 17, 2020 by JennyD

[ktgrok]

1 hour ago, Ordinary Shoes said:

 

So getting back to the OP's question - if you want your kids to listen to the pastor then you want them to see the pastor following rules him/herself. That does not mean that we expect the pastor to be perfect. But a very obvious transgression of the rules sends a message to our kids that we all get to pick and choose the rules we want to follow. 

More to that - we ALL have lines that we hold when it comes to choosing a church. Be that particular theological issues around predestination, or abortion, or salvation itself. And we have other issues as well...most of us would not sit and listen to a preacher who they knew say, lied habitually, liked to drive drunk, or beat his wife, or whatever. Not saying mask wearing is in the same level - just pointing out we all have lines we have established regarding if a pastor is fit to influence our kids and lead us. 

There is nothing saying that this can't be one of those issues.