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Mom0012

Leadership Books for Women

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Can anyone recommend something like this? My dd is taking on a leadership role that she desperately wants to perform but is struggling with having the other more experienced males in the group take over the second she hesitates as she is implementing new skills. It is making it difficult for her to get the practice she needs in order to become confident in this role. She is being criticized for not being forceful enough. She comes across as very confident in daily life, but does not feel confident in this role yet and being forceful isn’t her nature. She is a sweet, kind, thoughtful, conscientious perfectionist who doesn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings so this is a big struggle for her.

If there is a book that is good that is also offered in Spanish, that would be a bonus.

Are there gender specific leadership classes for women?

ETA: Since there are a lot of INTJs on this board, I thought I’d mention that she is an INTJ. Looking for any kind of advice that’s out there.

One thing she just did was switch to a female mentor. I’m hoping that is going to help her.

Edited by Mom0012
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I just finished reading “Lean In” by Sheryl Sandberg - very good on this topic. 

Edited by PinkTulip
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1 hour ago, PinkTulip said:

I just finished reading “Lean In” by Sheryl Sandberg - very good on this topic. 

Thanks! That’s one I’ve been looking at.

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If her mentor is amenable, or if you know someone else in a professional position who is, perhaps she could role play some basic scenarios.  I see a lot of young women who could benefit from intentionally lowering the register of their voices; avoiding language such as "I'm sorry this is late," in favor of "thank you for your patience," or, "I feel that X" in favor of, "X,"; and not giggling for any reason.  Even uptalking is terribly common among 20-somethings.  Young women, especially, tend to come across as younger and less experienced than they are and can often benefit from another person's perspective on their presentation.

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1 hour ago, plansrme said:

If her mentor is amenable, or if you know someone else in a professional position who is, perhaps she could role play some basic scenarios.  I see a lot of young women who could benefit from intentionally lowering the register of their voices; avoiding language such as "I'm sorry this is late," in favor of "thank you for your patience," or, "I feel that X" in favor of, "X,"; and not giggling for any reason.  Even uptalking is terribly common among 20-somethings.  Young women, especially, tend to come across as younger and less experienced than they are and can often benefit from another person's perspective on their presentation.

This all sounds like good advice, especially the role playing. She actually already intentionally lowers her voice and projects it (which always surprises me when we are out!) from her speech days. I have been working with her for years to avoid unnecessary apologies as well as qualifying language in her emails and she’s gotten really good with that there, but I do wonder if she could be doing that verbally in this position. She isn’t a giggler at all and I don’t think she does the uptalking thing, but I will watch for that to make sure. What she does do is just completely clam up when she is upset or stressed and she can’t do that in this position. She is already feeling more positive with her new mentor and she has given her some ideas to try that will hopefully help, but I thought reading about this might be good too.

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OP I found your thread very interesting, because my DD is constantly being exposed to things in her school,  where Leadership is expected or the goal is to become a Leader. Those skills are needed everywhere. In the Military, they need people who can become Leaders. When I receive an email about a Software Engineering assignment, most of them want people who can lead a team. If your DD can  hone those skills, she will benefit from that.  Good luck to her!  

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