klmama Posted January 1, 2020 Posted January 1, 2020 How do you go about making lasting changes to your thought process and behaviors? I know a couple of people who have changed from being pessimistic and irritable to being pleasant and optimistic. They just "decided" to be different, and so they were. I'm glad that worked for them, but I'd like a bit more of a "how-to" path, KWIM? If you've improved your thought process and behaviors, what made success attainable for you? Quote
Pen Posted January 1, 2020 Posted January 1, 2020 Try Happiness is a Choice - book by Barry Neil Kaufman for an explanation of a way it can be done... and or Atomic Habits to help for appproach to any changes Quote
MercyA Posted January 1, 2020 Posted January 1, 2020 I recommend You Are Not Your Brain by Jeffrey Schwartz. 1 Quote
J-rap Posted January 1, 2020 Posted January 1, 2020 2 hours ago, MercyA said: I recommend You Are Not Your Brain by Jeffrey Schwartz. I haven't read that one by Jeffrey Schwartz, but I've read another one of his: The Mind and the Brain, which is also very good. 1 Quote
Pawz4me Posted January 1, 2020 Posted January 1, 2020 A very casual and slow study of secular Buddhism and stoicism has done wonders for me. 2 Quote
Momto6inIN Posted January 1, 2020 Posted January 1, 2020 Telling Yourself the Truth by William Backus (I think that's his name) is written from a definite Christian perspective, so that might not be what you're looking for. But it's all about how to identify the false/negative self talk we all engage in and replace it with true thoughts. One of the top 5 life changing books I've read! Quote
PeachyDoodle Posted January 1, 2020 Posted January 1, 2020 (edited) Mindfulness meditation and breathwork have been instrumental for me. I needed a lot of practice recognizing my thoughts before I could do anything to challenge them. Ultimately I have learned that I do not have to accept a thought/feeling just because it enters my head. They will pass on by if I let them. But it's definitely a practice! Edited January 1, 2020 by PeachyDoodle 4 Quote
BeachGal Posted January 1, 2020 Posted January 1, 2020 Martin Seligman’s book Learned Optimism explains how to figure out you’re pessimistic patterns, why pessimism can be unhealthy and what you can do to recognize and change it. It’s a few decades old but he might have something more recently written. Keeping a gratitude journal has been shown to help. 1 Quote
73349 Posted January 1, 2020 Posted January 1, 2020 The Complaint-Free World method is to catch yourself every time you say something negative and switch a bracelet from one wrist to another. Eventually, you should develop the habit of correcting your thought. I also have found prayer beads useful for setting my intentions for the day. 1 Quote
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