Appetizers

[scrapbookbuzz]

When you're going to someone's house for a gathering (for 6 - 10 people) and they say they'll "provide the appetizers" to you,
What does that look like to you? What do you expect?

Edited December 29, 2019 by scrapbookbuzz

[Janeway]

Don't go hungry. There will be a few little things to snack on. They will probably taste quite good so eat first so you are less likely to be tempted to eat a bunch.

[Annie G]

Here’s how dh interprets ‘appetizers’: eat before we go. 

[Annie G]

2 minutes ago, parent said:

For our circle of friends, that's at least a veggie tray, dips and crackers or bread, meat and cheese, usually so smoked fish or seafood. At least.  If only appetizers, i expect it to be enough to satisfy as a meal but just grazing and chatting, not having to sit down to a meal.

For Christmas, I made a hot artichoke spinach dip, hot garlic mushroom dip and had sliced toasted baguette.  I also had a whole smoked salmon fillet with lemon and crackers, a dish of pickles, a dish of smoked oysters.  My SIL brought a big veggie tray, platter of shrimp, platter of rolled meats and cheese (salami and proscuitto).  I usually do a relish tray  and baked brie but didn't.  This was before a big dinner.  If only appetizers, i would do more.  But i tend to overdo food and like variety.  For new year's eve i do a lot more because it's several hours of only appetizers and desserts.

Are you asking for something you're hosting or attending?  

Your spread sounds fantastic!  We recently went to a gathering where the host had nacho dip and chips, cheese and crackers, some kind of veggie dip with celery and carrots to dip in it,  and  Chex mix.  With one eyebrow dh signaled a perfect ‘I told you eating before we came was a good idea’.  It was from 5-8 and I thought the appetizers might be more substantial because of the timing.  Yours would have totally filled me up, even just having a couple bites of each. I mean, sure, the ones we had would have filled me up but I try to limit the fat in cheese/dips and carbs from stuff like chips. 
 

 

 

[MercyA]

@parent, your appetizer spread sounds amazing! 🤤

[school17777]

Appetizers to me means a snack, not a full meal.

[itsheresomewhere]

Appetizers here can be anything from eat before you go to a smorgasbord of appetizers.  My friend’s spread includes wings, meat tray, veggies and lots of other appetizers.  Yet we went to a party not long ago that was very sparse with appetizers for a crowd ( think a bag of chips and dip). 

[HazelAnne]

I think their comment could mean anything... If you are hosting and they are bringing the appetizers, I’d be tempted to have something extra on hand that you could put out if needed. 
 

[J-rap]

Here, if it's a gathering of appetizers only, it will be enough to feed everyone who is hungry.  It's like a full dinner broken down into small plates, and usually with wine on the side. 🙂 

[happi duck]

I would assume that meant not to expect dinner and there'd be a couple things to snack on.

Op, what happened to spark this question?

[PeterPan]

14 hours ago, scrapbookbuzz said:

When you're going to someone's house for a gathering (for 6 - 10 people) and they say they'll "provide the appetizers" to you,
What does that look like to you? What do you expect?

If they said it exactly that way (the appetizers), then maybe they're expecting you to bring drinks?  You should probably just ask.

[unsinkable]

20 hours ago, happi duck said:

I would assume that meant not to expect dinner and there'd be a couple things to snack on.

Op, what happened to spark this question?

Yes, what happened?

Or are you planning to have an appetizer party?

I know sometimes people have drinks and apps before going to a play or theatre. When my brother visits we might have a drink before we go to a restaurant or other event but not the apps.

[gardenmom5]

first take into consideration the person saying it.

some people, that would be chips and other things they can just rip open.

others would be more substantial. veggie tray, cheeses, finger foods, etc.

I agree, don't go hungry.

[gardenmom5]

On 12/28/2019 at 8:03 PM, parent said:

So I posted in the grossed out and potluck threads about going to someone's filthy house.  They had their family and invited 3 families over for dinner, plus another single guy came.  The families each had at least 3 kids.  Actually, I think ours was the smallest at 3 kids, and everyone else had 4 kids.  They had nachos which is fine and kid friendly.  BUT they had less than i would provide for ONLY MY family.  They had one bag of chips, and 1 small bowl of each topping.  Of course, if I had seen the extent of their filthy house before dinner, I wouldn't have eaten anything.  I've never seen so stingy a spread.  I assumed there was more in the kitchen... but no.  We were baffled by the entire encounter. 

So, I guess after that experience, if it's a first time visit, I would eat something first.

ime: some people are truly clueless at estimating quantities.  if they are such poor housekeepers, I could easily imagine they were utterly clueless about how much food to provide.

[cjzimmer1]

3 hours ago, gardenmom5 said:

ime: some people are truly clueless at estimating quantities.  if they are such poor housekeepers, I could easily imagine they were utterly clueless about how much food to provide.

I also wonder if they just aren't big eaters.  I know several families where they eat like birds.  I spent a week sharing a house/kitchen with one of those families and they ate less all day than one of my younger kids eat for breakfast.  Aka, the kid had a slice of toast for breakfast, 2 pieces of string cheese for lunch, an apple in the afternoon and a hot dog (no bun) for supper.  Kid was 9 years old.  His brother comes to my house frequently and eats like that as well.  Mom ate about 2 ounce of fish and a spoonful of cucumber for lunch.  They just don't eat much.  This mom also brought 2 pounds of taco meat to feed 13 people and was surprised there were no leftovers (she told me she usually makes about 1/4 pound of meat for her family of 4).  My family is on the other side and every eats a lot so all I can do is shake my head at those tiny amounts but it really is all they normally eat.  I could totally see if the family normally doesn't eat much that it seems like "plenty" of food for a party to them.

[scrapbookbuzz]

So...here's what happened, and, thus, why I asked the question. Every Christmas we go over to a certain person's house, as they have room to entertain and we don't really. We both agreed we wanted to do something "different" food-wise, something other than turkey or ham. Initially we had agreed on breakfast for dinner. Then two days before Christmas, said person said they "just wanted to chill" on Christmas, and let's bump our gathering to later in the week. No problem. I was really kind of glad for that myself, actually.

A few days later, person invites us to come over "Friday or Saturday - I'll have the appetizers, you bring the drinks." Again, not a problem.  Except that...
the "appetizers" (for a known quantity of a total of 5 people) was maybe a 12 x 12 serving platter with a few veggies, a few spiced pecans, a dip, and a small portion (think 1 - 2 portions) of charcuterie (salami/pepperoni/cheese).  That's IT. That was this person's idea of "appetizers". For a person who works in and has worked in a type of hospitality field for YEARS and is no stranger to hosting parties, I was really surprised (and disappointed, and HUNGRY) by this. I would have totally brought another couple of appetizers if I knew that was going to be the only food available. 

Anyway, that's why I asked. I was just so stunned by it all.

[scrapbookbuzz]

Found a pic of what was provided. Let's see if I can fivure out how to upload it here...

Did it! And yep, that was all there was for appetizers.

 

[happi duck]

I think that's an adequate platter for "stop by for a drink" and not for "come hang out for the evening". 

With the change in style and date it seems like this person has something hard going on.

[scrapbookbuzz]

No, there is nothing really "hard" going on in said person's life. I know them fairly well and they would tell me. As for "bring drinks", that did not mean alcohol.
We took two bottles of sparkling cider and soda. Next time someone says they will provide appetizers, though, I am going to get clarification! LOL

Thank you all for your input and responses.