Experienced Kinship Caregivers (through the system)

[Carrie12345]

We have a relative who’s had rotating open cases for years, never with removal, as far as I know. In that time, I’ve contacted caseworkers twice; once to be certain dh and I were known relatives in the file and once to inform of a relative’s move. Dh has also been in contact once over the years, again to be sure that our contact info was known and to offer any needed info.  Obviously they’ve never been able to give us any detailed information on any case.

Today, I called again because we had heard that the kids were removed. I was able to find out that they were not, but that there has been “contact” with them. However, this time the person I spoke to took ALL of our information, including that which would obviously be used to run background and criminal checks. She also ran me briefly through the steps that would occur if the kids were to be removed.  That has definitely never happened on my calls before!

I’m left wondering whether or not I should be reading anything into that. It isn’t as if they were seeking US out. I called them. They did have our contact information (or should have) if needed. They weren’t to the point of actively looking for relatives. And yet, they’ve never before wanted our more personal and household information.  It felt like next level stuff, but am I making too much of it?

I was encouraged to contact the parent, which was also a surprising first. I haven’t heard back, and my expectations there are low.

I know I’m going to make myself bonkers either way, but I’m still wondering what others might be thinking in this situation.

 

[Pam in CT]

((hugs)).  

No experience or insight to offer; just grateful on behalf of those kids that you and your husband are offstage but attentive, caring about and pulling for them.

[Carrie12345]

6 hours ago, Pam in CT said:

((hugs)).  

No experience or insight to offer; just grateful on behalf of those kids that you and your husband are offstage but attentive, caring about and pulling for them.

Well, thanks! It’s messy and stressful due to all the issues that, you know, cause the actual issue, but they’re innocent and vulnerable kids no different than the ones I’ve made. They’ve just been born into incredibly unfair circumstances.  To be honest, we have had to build a bit of an emotional wall after so many years of will they/won’t they, which is why the difference this time has me wondering if I should be getting both extra concerned and extra hopeful.  It gets harder and harder to recover from each case that closes with the bare minimum change.

(Which isn’t to poo-poo keeping families intact. I fully support that with real change.)

[Ottakee]

As a fire foster parent it sounds like they might be closer to a removal this time.  That said, nothing is ever for sure in foster care.