What new habits or goals did you cultivate successfully this year?

[Ginevra]

I am a person who is committed to always learning and trying to make life better and, to that goal, I spend a good bit of the last month of the year assessing the past year and how well I have done with cultivating new habits or goals, and committing to new ones for the coming year.  So here are habits and goals I improved upon this year and I would like for others to share theirs. 

Early this year, I started setting my alarm for 5:35, instead of rising at about 6:15. (One thing I changed is doing away with our old, cacophonous alarm clock and setting my iPad on a lovely, gentle chime that gradually gets louder.) I used to drag myself out of bed after dh got out of the shower. Now, I am up before him. 

I make the coffee, and I read, sometimes come here or to FB, direct e-mails (that’s another habit; more about this in a minute), I consult my calendar and make To Dos. 

I do 20 minutes of Yoga - that’s new this year - and 15 minutes of meditation, also new. I have inconsistently also done either specific breast cancer exercises or strength training; I would like to organize this better and be consistent with it next year. I have also done sporadic walking daily but I am inconsistent with this, too. 

I no longer watch TV news with dh, which has brought more peace to our marriage. I was afraid of letting go of this ritual, because that was “together” time, which we no longer have, but it was worth letting go of because I simply could not help but get angry if we disagreed about political things. 

We begun a dinner once a month with a compatible couple; we rotate houses and we have a lot in common. Those dinners have greatly enriched our lives. 

The email thing: I talked about this a while ago on here because I’ve been so bad about email management. But I began a new habit. I check email definitely in the morning and definitely before bed and I address every unread. I delete, re-route, star for action or respond directly. Every single one. I don’t let my email get higher than around 30 unreads ever. 

I started going to the movies nearly every week, taking a page out of @Garga‘s book. Sometimes, friends join me, but usually I go alone. I have seen more movies this year, I think, than probably the past fifteen years totaled. 

I have continued to seek out at least one new experience every month (most months, I have several). Sometimes these are big, like going on a trip somewhere, but often they are small, like trying a new food or shopping in a different store. 

I think that’s everything. A lot of my habits this year were attached to waking up and what I would do n that early morning time. 

What about you? 

[Carol in Cal.]

My word of the year was Stewardship, which encompasses relationships with others and with God, and also wise use of time, of capabilities, of possessions, and of finances.  

I've had a tumultuous year for reasons that involve too many other people's privacies to go into in detail, but I would say that having that word of the year has really helped me to make steady progress in the wise stewardship of all of those things, and I am inclined to continue that word of the year into next year.

But since it's going to be 2020, I think I'm going to have to switch to ROAR!  Because how can I not?  LOL  After all it's the start of the roaring twenties!

Edited December 1, 2019 by Carol in Cal.

[Guest]

I do a Word for the year, too and my word this year has been Strength. I know what word I want for 2020, too: Brave. 

I have done the word for several years and I love the way it truly dovetails with my experiences for the year! 

[73349]

This year I used a productivity app to keep myself consistent on whatever small good habits I've felt important to work on, many of them just for a little while at a time.

ETA: I also made a major change in my religious life, including leaving the denomination I've been part of my entire adult life and joining something quite different. I feel really good about where I am now. Amusingly, DH's church and mine have been sort of on opposite ends of the spectrum, but now I am in one that still seems opposite to his but also unlike my previous one. The opposite of the opposite is yet another opposite.

My word for 2020 is envision. I want to align my habits and activities with my vision for life. I'm still working on the details, but will probably erase everything in the app and put in behaviors that reflect this vision.

Edited December 2, 2019 by whitehawk

[Guest]

7 minutes ago, whitehawk said:

This year I used a productivity app to keep myself consistent on whatever small good habits I've felt important to work on, many of them just for a little while at a time.

My word for 2020 is envision. I want to align my habits and activities with my vision for life. I'm still working on the details, but will probably erase everything in the app and put in behaviors that reflect this vision.

Do you mind sharing what app? 

[matrips]

57 minutes ago, Quill said:

I am a person who is committed to always learning and trying to make life better and, to that goal, I spend a good bit of the last month of the year assessing the past year and how well I have done with cultivating new habits or goals, and committing to new ones for the coming year.  So here are habits and goals I improved upon this year and I would like for others to share theirs. 

Early this year, I started setting my alarm for 5:35, instead of rising at about 6:15. (One thing I changed is doing away with our old, cacophonous alarm clock and setting my iPad on a lovely, gentle chime that gradually gets louder.) I used to drag myself out of bed after dh got out of the shower. Now, I am up before him. 

I make the coffee, and I read, sometimes come here or to FB, direct e-mails (that’s another habit; more about this in a minute), I consult my calendar and make To Dos. 

I do 20 minutes of Yoga - that’s new this year - and 15 minutes of meditation, also new. I have inconsistently also done either specific breast cancer exercises or strength training; I would like to organize this better and be consistent with it next year. I have also done sporadic walking daily but I am inconsistent with this, too. 

I no longer watch TV news with dh, which has brought more peace to our marriage. I was afraid of letting go of this ritual, because that was “together” time, which we no longer have, but it was worth letting go of because I simply could not help but get angry if we disagreed about political things. 

We begun a dinner once a month with a compatible couple; we rotate houses and we have a lot in common. Those dinners have greatly enriched our lives. 

The email thing: I talked about this a while ago on here because I’ve been so bad about email management. But I began a new habit. I check email definitely in the morning and definitely before bed and I address every unread. I delete, re-route, star for action or respond directly. Every single one. I don’t let my email get higher than around 30 unreads ever. 

I started going to the movies nearly every week, taking a page out of @Garga‘s book. Sometimes, friends join me, but usually I go alone. I have seen more movies this year, I think, than probably the past fifteen years totaled. 

I have continued to seek out at least one new experience every month (most months, I have several). Sometimes these are big, like going on a trip somewhere, but often they are small, like trying a new food or shopping in a different store. 

I think that’s everything. A lot of my habits this year were attached to waking up and what I would do n that early morning time. 

What about you? 

Wow!  That’s inspiring!

[Annie G]

My biggest accomplishment was being consistent with my journal. It’s a combo of bullet journal and diary and pretty much everything in between. I love that I have pages that document every book I read, every movie we saw, trips we took, house projects, etc.   I can go back and see where I struggled and where I thrived, and hopefully learn from it all. 

But 2019 was rough. Dh and I lived apart for the first six months-,we bought a new house 900 miles away and I moved and began renovations while he stayed behind to sell our old place and finish working. His dad passed away. My dad’s dementia got a lot worse. Oldest dd’s husband lost his ministry job, found another, and moved their family. I moved away from my home of 27 years- starting all over in a new place. A place I dearly love, but it’s hard to start fresh at my age. We’re ‘working’ with dh’s sister to settle his dad’s estate and it’s not going smoothly. And dh retired mid year. So now we’re adjusting to that. It’s been a lot.  A whole lot. 
 

Looking for my word or phrase for next year, and trying to set some goals. Bought my new journal today- my beloved Leuchtturm 1917 has served me well and I look forward to filling another.

Keep sharing the words, the goals...I’m taking it all in and hoping it helps me focus on what I want 2020 to look like.  

[regentrude]

I was not fully successful with my goal of establishing a daily writing practice for both journaling and working on my poetry, but I would say I was successful in establishing a regular (albeit not daily) routine.  And that is OK. 

For me, goals work by setting me on the path in some direction; after a while, actually reaching the goal becomes unimportant, because I am satisfied with moving in that direction. I had that happen multiple times. My goal to publish a book by my 50th birthday was instrumental in setting me to steady working, but became unimportant once I had established a regular writing routine, and the fact that the book wasn't done until closer to 51 did not matter. My goal of doing 100 submissions to literary journals was important to get me in the habit of submitting regularly; I ended up having done only about 60 subs, and am totally fine with it because it was still a big improvement over the 2 from the previous year, LOL, and a big step in getting work out.

I am hesitant to choose my word of the year.  I have done it for several years; this year my word "Friends" took on an unexpected life of its own, almost like a spell whose working we cannot control. It was a disconcerting experience, and I need to put a lot of thought into my new choice.

 

Edited December 2, 2019 by regentrude

[Guest]

4 minutes ago, regentrude said:

I was not fully successful with my goal of establishing a daily writing practice for both journaling and working on my poetry, but I would say I was successful in establishing a regular (albeit not daily) routine.  And that is OK. 

For me, goals work by setting me on the path in some direction; after a while, actually reaching the goal becomes unimportant, because I am satisfied with moving in that direction. I had that happen multiple times. My goal to publish a book by my 50th birthday was instrumental in setting me to steady working, but became unimportant once I had established a regular writing routine, and the fact that the book wasn't done until closer to 51 did not matter. My goal of doing 100 submissions to literary journals was important to get me in the habit of submitting regularly; I ended up having done only about 60 subs, and am totally fine with it because it was still a big improvement over the 2 from the previous year, LOL, and a big step in getting work out.

I am hesitant to choose my word of the year.  I have done it for several years; this year my word "Friends" took on an unexpected life of its own, almost like a spell whose working we cannot control. It was a disconcerting experience, and I need to put a lot of thought into my new choice.

 

I love this. It gives me hope, lol. 

What literary journals do you submit to? 

[regentrude]

9 minutes ago, Quill said:

What literary journals do you submit to? 

Mostly online ones, because I like the accessibility of online publications  - after all, the goal is to be read, and few people purchase print only mags. I mostly choose mags that don't charge a submission fee. Some of my faves this year were Thimble, Nixes Mate, Gyroscope, Bindweed, Blue Nib... Not going to bore you with a full list 🙂  Got 35 poems accepted, very happy with that.

 

 

Edited December 2, 2019 by regentrude

[Guest]

4 minutes ago, regentrude said:

Mostly online ones, because I like the accessibility of online publications  - after all, the goal is to be read, and few people purchase print only mags. I mostly choose mags that don't charge a submission fee. Some of my faves this year were Thimble, Nixes Mate, Gyroscope, Bindweed, Blue Nib... Not going to bore you with a full list 🙂  Got 35 poems accepted, very happy with that.

 

 

That is absolutely awesome! 

[regentrude]

Just now, Quill said:

That is absolutely awesome! 

Thank you. I did have a super productive year, even with only an "almost" daily routine. My second book is coming out in March, just working on the final edits.

[Matryoshka]

Some very inspiring posts!

This last year I had a few goals; some went really well and others, while not totally neglected, may need more focus next year!

The big one was to get fit.  I had been getting fairly regular moderate exercise, but the scale was not moving.  This year I have been working out 5x a week, and now I miss it if I don't get it in.  In January I also made the commitment to shift my diet- I knew what I needed to do, but I wanted to make it a permanent lifestyle change, so that also entailed coming up with new recipes to put into rotation.  That really worked (it helped that my last kid left in Jan, so I didn't have to accommodate her pickiness anymore).  I set a goal to lose 30 lbs, but now I'm actually down 40(!), and at a very healthy BMI from being almost in the obese range (being that close scared me!).

Other goals were to declutter the house and start making more intentional time with friends and spouse.  Made a bit of progress on all of those, but I think they need more focus this coming year.  I need to set things up to be habits or regularly recurring - this is what makes things stick for me.  The problem is finding what actually works to make that happen.  Someone else upthread mentioned meditation - I've been wanting to add that in somehow, but that's another one where I'll have to figure out how to make it part of a routine - and for me, getting up early is not it!  Not a morning person!!  Better goal would be to get to bed at a reasonable time on a regular basis.

I've never had a word for the year, and I'm not sure I'd want one - that seems like a lot of pressure to me, lol!

[73349]

2 hours ago, Quill said:

Do you mind sharing what app? 

Habitica. It's free.

[Soror]

Thank you for the thread, I always love the reflections at the end of the year.

I started to reply to this earlier but had to get supper in the oven. I'm glad I had to wait as I was going to reply I had not established any new habits but that is not entirely true. I reestablished a couple of old habits that had fallen away with all the changes we had (taking on a PT job from home and ds going off to PS among other things). I am now back to walking 10k steps a day (not every single day but definitely most of them and many days it is more). I've also added back in read-alouds to our school day.

Most of our year was getting adjusted to all the changes of the previous year, it has been rough but we finally, firmly in our new groove. Dh is doing well in college and juggling it with his full time+ job. Ds is doing well in school. I've finally adjusted to my work schedule and am no longer a brain dead zombie with my 6 day a week 4:30 wake up.

I continued on with regular exercising and kept on, even when it was challenging. My house is cleaner than it was this time last year and is kept up decently most of the time.

[PeterPan]

This year I've been exploring things that give me pleasure, things that make me feel good, and I've slowly been integrating them into my routines. 

And amen to ditching the news. I did that a few years ago, and it's such a relief. They don't talk about anything very diverse anyway, just politics. If you want to know the news in brief, you can get it on your FB feed or in your email or whatever. 

Edited December 2, 2019 by PeterPan

[Slache]

We moved from Portland to San Antonio and had an immensely difficult year physically, financially and emotionally.

I began using YNAB, a budgeting software that has taught me things I didn't see coming and has been great for our family.

We go to evening service on Sundays. 

That's it. Next year will be better.

[Garga]

My house always feels messy—little piles of papers, drawers stuffed too full, odds and ends gathered on top of the dryer (batteries, hair ties, a pad of paper...junk). When I stand in a room and look around, I get overwhelmed with all that needs to be done. When I try to clean a room, I’m interrupted 40 times and nothing ever gets done. My peace of mind is starting to be overly affected by this and I was getting downright depressed feeling like I was doomed to live in a pile of clutter for the next 6 years until both kids are away at college. 

Two days ago, I realized that instead of looking at the house as a whole or each room as a whole, I could look at it piece-of-furniture by piece-of-furniture.  I honestly don’t expect to clean more than one stick of furniture a day, and then maintain what’s been done.  It’ll take many days, but as long as there’s progress, I don’t care if it takes a solid year.

So, my goal for the next year is to clean my house, one stick of furniture at a time.  I can feel it within me that this is the way for me at this time; that I can maintain things if I can just get rid of the clutter initially.

It’s silly that it took me this long to realize that I don’t have to do it all or nothing, room by room, but at least I did finally realize it.  🙂

 

@Quill (Sounds like you’re enjoying your movie nights!  I just hit the 150 movie mark two weeks ago. !!!)

Edited December 2, 2019 by Garga

[Guest]

1 hour ago, Matryoshka said:

Some very inspiring posts!

This last year I had a few goals; some went really well and others, while not totally neglected, may need more focus next year!

The big one was to get fit.  I had been getting fairly regular moderate exercise, but the scale was not moving.  This year I have been working out 5x a week, and now I miss it if I don't get it in.  In January I also made the commitment to shift my diet- I knew what I needed to do, but I wanted to make it a permanent lifestyle change, so that also entailed coming up with new recipes to put into rotation.  That really worked (it helped that my last kid left in Jan, so I didn't have to accommodate her pickiness anymore).  I set a goal to lose 30 lbs, but now I'm actually down 40(!), and at a very healthy BMI from being almost in the obese range (being that close scared me!).

Other goals were to declutter the house and start making more intentional time with friends and spouse.  Made a bit of progress on all of those, but I think they need more focus this coming year.  I need to set things up to be habits or regularly recurring - this is what makes things stick for me.  The problem is finding what actually works to make that happen.  Someone else upthread mentioned meditation - I've been wanting to add that in somehow, but that's another one where I'll have to figure out how to make it part of a routine - and for me, getting up early is not it!  Not a morning person!!  Better goal would be to get to bed at a reasonable time on a regular basis.

I've never had a word for the year, and I'm not sure I'd want one - that seems like a lot of pressure to me, lol!

About the word of the year: I’m going to get pretty woo-woo here, but seriously, my word for the next year always reveals itself to me. I literally never have put any effort into deciding on a word, the word just “shows up” and says, “Here I am! Your word for next year!” I just “know” it in the same way as I “knew” what name I was going to give my kid. It was like I saw the name and just had that click internally - that’s the baby’s name. Then, when I mentioned the name to dh, he would also seem to click with the name. 

Word of the year, so far, has always been this way, too. I see or hear a word towards the end of the year and I just know that is the word. In a couple of cases, I have even argued internally, like the year my word was “Experience” and I was worried, what if this means a bad experience? But Experience persisted on the screen of my mind and I made that my word. 

I hope your word finds you! 

[PeterPan]

8 minutes ago, Garga said:

So, my goal for the next year is to clean my house, one stick of furniture at a time.

Yes!! Chunking is so huge.

I've been going through rooms this year, one at a time, thinking about what would make me HAPPY in them. So I brought dot to dots into my sunroom and now I know why I'd want to be there. That kind of thing. Preventing clutter is harder and takes energy. Like it's nice to say habits, but for me it's always energy. I have a great intention, then my energy nosedives for a week and I'm like whoa, what happened.

The only thing that has miraculously transformed my clutter life, well two things.

1. a VERY SMALL desk. Seriously. Best thing every. Gets full faster so I have to clean it more often. 

2. spiral notebooks. I write everything, so I end up with tons of paper all over life. I've had to expand the concept to spiral notebooks in the kitchen, spirals at my desk, spirals for conferences, spirals for projects, etc., but you get the idea. Never ever loose paper. I'm trying notebooks (Better Binders) this year, but I'm being more cautious. I'm only trying that for menu planning. Everything else is in a spiral notebook. That way, if it's not in my spiral and it's on my desk, I know it needs to be dealt with and tossed. Bills file or go paperless. But everything else, toss.

[PeterPan]

1 hour ago, Matryoshka said:

  Someone else upthread mentioned meditation - I've been wanting to add that in somehow,

So this isn't *exactly* meditation, but in the mornings I stop, put on my pulse oximeter, and try to feel my heartbeat. It's an act of *mindfulness* and doing that for just a few minutes bumps your EF and self awareness.

[Momto6inIN]

My goals for this year were modest - I wanted to not get fatter after the baby was born and I was nursing and hungry all the time. So far so good on that one! I lost all the baby weight pretty quickly and have kept it from creeping back up again. I'm still about 30 pounds overweight, but I'm not getting worse 🙂

I also started a photography class that I'm doing at my own pace, which makes me feel like I'm learning something instead of succumbing to "mommy brain". I'm not able to keep up with the class schedule as written, but I'm keeping all the assignments and steadily making progress on them as I have time.

I do better with just a few relatively easy achievable goals rather than big ones that I get discouraged from when they are hard to achieve. Laziness? Maybe. Fear of failure? Definitely. But baby steps are what work best for me 🙂

[Murphy101]

In the last 12 months:

I renewed my commitment to continued daily mass attendance.

I lost a lot of weight (210 to 143) to win my HealthyWage and $2200 and got healthier. 
Getting up at 5am 6 days a week and exercising for 30+ minutes 6 days a week and eating Whole30  every day.

I have finally got to do some traveling.  A week in Cozumel with a girlfriend.  A week in Punta Cana with dh. A week in Branson with dh, 10 of 11 kids and my best friends. And recently 10 days in Curacao with best friends.  I basicly started paying myself before bills and learned that travel outside the states is a LOT less expensive than nearly anywhere stateside. 

I started pt college classes for myself. It’s been brutal but I’m hanging in there.  I still have no idea what I’ll be when I grow up.

 

[Carrie12345]

Not so much a habit, but 2019 was a year of reprioritizing for me. I’ve been working really hard to decide where to focus my energy, and how much. I had been all-in with an organization that is dear to me, but it was killing me. It controlled every aspect of my life.  I transitioned to smaller roles, which was EXTREMELY difficult, but I feel so much more balanced now.  I’ve even been able to take on additional roles in another organization without throwing things back out of whack.

We’ve also made progress on the house, our debt, and have strengthened friendships.

I still have a lot of work to do with decluttering and organizing, and I want to do some actual *decorating for once, but those are all things that will always be ongoing. I’m glad for the progress I did make this year.

I want 2020 to be the year of planning and working toward the next chapter.  We’ve been flying by the seat of our pants this whole time. I’ve been raising kids for literally half of my life ,basically all of my adulthood, and just throwing myself into what they need or what I want for them.  I expect to continue doing that, but not to the same degree. We’ll be down to two minors in the next year and a half, which is a big change from 5!  I have a lengthy list of things I hope/dream/wish for for the next 20 years, but it’s time to start narrowing down to some actual goals if I’m ever going to make any of them happen!

[Guest]

44 minutes ago, Carrie12345 said:

Not so much a habit, but 2019 was a year of reprioritizing for me. I’ve been working really hard to decide where to focus my energy, and how much. I had been all-in with an organization that is dear to me, but it was killing me. It controlled every aspect of my life.  I transitioned to smaller roles, which was EXTREMELY difficult, but I feel so much more balanced now.  I’ve even been able to take on additional roles in another organization without throwing things back out of whack.

We’ve also made progress on the house, our debt, and have strengthened friendships.

I still have a lot of work to do with decluttering and organizing, and I want to do some actual *decorating for once, but those are all things that will always be ongoing. I’m glad for the progress I did make this year.

I want 2020 to be the year of planning and working toward the next chapter.  We’ve been flying by the seat of our pants this whole time. I’ve been raising kids for literally half of my life ,basically all of my adulthood, and just throwing myself into what they need or what I want for them.  I expect to continue doing that, but not to the same degree. We’ll be down to two minors in the next year and a half, which is a big change from 5!  I have a lengthy list of things I hope/dream/wish for for the next 20 years, but it’s time to start narrowing down to some actual goals if I’m ever going to make any of them happen!

I really like your last paragraph and feel like I am in a similar place. I only have one minor now, and no homeschoolers, so I feel like there’s much opportunity for the next chapter. But, like you, I know it’s not going to amount to anything if I don’t make some true goals and start the baby steps to arrival. 

[Murphy101]

1 hour ago, Quill said:

I really like your last paragraph and feel like I am in a similar place. I only have one minor now, and no homeschoolers, so I feel like there’s much opportunity for the next chapter. But, like you, I know it’s not going to amount to anything if I don’t make some true goals and start the baby steps to arrival. 

This is me too. I grew tired and jaded of saying “someday”. Someday starts today.

I read something that said a 1% improvement goal is HUGE in a year. And I don’t know why but it was a light bulb moment for me. And that’s held true for me. 1% longer walk each day or even each week. 1% more $ set aside each payday.  I wish someone had illustrated that for me 20 years ago. Though I probably wouldn’t have believed them. Bc youth is really wasted on young people. 😆

[Junie]

2 hours ago, Quill said:

I really like your last paragraph and feel like I am in a similar place. I only have one minor now, and no homeschoolers, so I feel like there’s much opportunity for the next chapter. But, like you, I know it’s not going to amount to anything if I don’t make some true goals and start the baby steps to arrival. 

 

1 hour ago, Murphy101 said:

This is me too. I grew tired and jaded of saying “someday”. Someday starts today.

I read something that said a 1% improvement goal is HUGE in a year. And I don’t know why but it was a light bulb moment for me. And that’s held true for me. 1% longer walk each day or even each week. 1% more $ set aside each payday.  I wish someone had illustrated that for me 20 years ago. Though I probably wouldn’t have believed them. Bc youth is really wasted on young people. 😆

Yes!  Last year (2018) our pastor challenged us to make some true, specific goals.  I wrote down a couple of statements from his sermon that really resonated with me and I made a list last year and again this year. 

"Those who set goals and fail achieve more than those who do not set goals."

"A dream without a goal is a wish."

I, of course, haven't met all of my goals -- not by a longshot -- but I have achieved some things that I can be happy about.

One of the habits that I have started this year is duolingo.  I would like to improve my Spanish (and French) skills, so I started working on duolingo almost every day.  I also started attending a Spanish church service once a week.

Also, I began attending a Tai Chi class.  I have had a hard time finding an instructor that I like, but I finally found one.

 

[Ausmumof3]

In a lot of ways this year has felt like staying still or even going backwards.  Back to having a car loan after two paid off cars.  And a couple of mindsets / thought habits I’d worked to develop don’t seem to be working well any more.

There are a couple of things I’ve stuck with for a bit - not the whole year but a few months.  I’ve followed the lit life podcast and read all the books so far.  This has been excellent for reestablishing a personal reading habit that was slipping.  And for the last couple of months I’ve hit duolingo every day.  I’m almost at level two for all the Italian lessons and finding I can make some sense of news articles etc though far from understanding all of it.  So that’s been fun.

next year I really want to get the read aloud with kids habit going again.  I was really sad when I was tidying books and realised I’d never read most of the golden books to youngest kid and he’s now 7.  We have read books but they’ve been school books not just because books.

 

 

[unsinkable]

On 9/5/2019 at 12:05 PM, unsinkable said:

September always seems like a "new year" because of back-to-school and grade promotion, etc. So I thought I'd update what happened with my Big List:

I didn't do a lot of it. 

BUT: in one aspect, I did a ton. 

I applied to be a volunteer tour guide for an organization in my city. I was accepted, I took a class (which I passed, woo-hoo! LOL) and this tour season I gave almost 10 tours!

So, by doing that, I covered/expanded a few of my weekly goals like: day trips, writing, walking, read & writing about hometown history.

I was so scared of going to the class bc I have really been in a cocoon of just taking care of DD for so long... I was nervous about meeting new people, if I could keep up with the class, if I could act normal (*she has trouble acting normal when she's nervous*/Counting Crows). I texted my one kid and said I think I am going to throw up, I am so scared and he replied:

"Don't worry. They are all going to be history geeks, just like you!" LOL And they were, for the most part.

Because of the class, I did a lot of MORE of some of the goals like: 

Day trip; They weren't really day trips, per se, but I took a bunch of other tours the org offers bc as a volunteer, they are free to me.

Walking: My tour is over a mile so by practicing it and then giving it, I was meeting or exceeding my walking goals

Reading,summarizing hometown history articles: I did so much of this. My tour is about 90 to 105 mins and covers dozens of historical events and locations so I studied a lot for the class plus every tour it seems someone asks me a question that leads me to more research. 

Writing: my goal for my tour is to be succinct and but include lots of info, ha-ha. So I write a lot of the info over and over in different ways so I can see how much I can say the shortest way possible. 

I have wanted to volunteer/do this for years and I am still kind of in shock that I was able to take the class without the bottom falling out of my home life. Because it seems like it is always something! And then for me to have given so many (it seems) tours, when stuff did happen this summer (like sicknesses and unexpected surgery for my family members)...seems even more incredible. It is almost like a dream. Did I really accomplish *THIS*? hahaha

Funny story: For my test tour, my teacher had me give the tour to the FOUNDER of the organization! Everyone has to "pass" by giving their whole formal tour to an experienced tour guide. I thought I was going to pee my pants when she said, "OK, unsinkable, you are with William." Not his real name. ugh ugh ugh.

William doesn't like people to use notes but we are allowed to use them. Most people do. I said, I can use my notes, right. Oh, sure, of course. Well, we get outside and I gave about 15% of the tour. It was William and a couple of my classmates who weren't ready for their tests (you can do the tests when you think you are ready). Then William said, "Unsinkable, you passed. Now put your notes away and just talk to us." oh, noooooooo! my nooooooootes! please, noooooooo!

I couldn't believe he said I had passed without even doing half the tour (which I found out later just isn't done). And then, to give HIM, of all people, my tour from memory. I thought, "By the time we're done, he'll rescind my pass." LOL But I did it, and he didn't rescind my pass. It felt really good. 

So, to sum up...my Ultimate List didn't quite work out the way I thought it would. It worked out even better, in a way that I hadn't even imagined when I made it in the dark days of December.

 

I had posted this update for my 2019 goals in September. 

Since then, I have learned 2 more tours and *wrote* an in-depth tour of one building. The writing of the tour was a surprise. Long story, but it is part of a series, and those of us who signed up to learn the series found out it was to create/write the series after we got there. It was a communication issue, LOL. But I/we could have said no, thanks.

So, now I know 3 tours plus "my" building but I'm not sure when the series w/my building is going to happen. I am also still self-studying this winter to be ready to give another tour in the spring.

I keep.saying this...But I can't believe that I did this. It is like a dream.

I've met some very nice people and I am getting closer/growing friendships with a few. 🙂

I also wrote this in Sept:

"Here is one of those weird connections...on my tour, I quote a famous person who essentially said, *think big; little plans don't have magic the way big ones do.* Now, I didn't know this in Dec, but in hindsight, it is neat."

I think I will probably make another big list for 2020 since the 2019 one turned out so well, if unexpectedly.

[Guest]

I LOVE your update, @unsinkable! What a great adventure! You all are really inspiring me to take my word - “Brave” - next year and really execute some Bravery. 

[Granny_Weatherwax]

A short response - I haven't had any candy or potato chips since July 30. I successfully made it through the fall season without any candy corn!

Yay me!!

[HS Mom in NC]

My focus last year was on self-discipline: regular Bible Study/devotions, prayer, and dietary habits.  This year I want to add to that a focus on work first, then play.  I have more free time now and I've been too self-indulgent instead of keeping it properly ordered and proportionate.

[wintermom]

@Quill You've been busy this past year! Good job identifying and addressing so many issues.

Things I've managed to fit into my new routine without too much pain (that's my form of "cultivating new habits" this past year) 😉

- taking public transportation and dealing with the annoyances without complaining too much

- working at a new job in a completely new field and navigating the experience to the best of my ability

- figuring out what helps my on-going health issues, with a big change being going gluten- and dairy-free. This is a big "new habit" that is easier some days than others. It's going to be brutal in many ways during the Christmas season with all the upcoming parties. I won't be eating much. I'll have to deal with it in a positive way.

- driving around my dh and dc even more that before, at all hours of the day and evening

- HIGHLIGHT: making a big effort to walk with friends as much as possible. This is working out well and it's such a positive part of my life.

[CTVKath]

Thanks for this thread. It never occurred to me to even think about what I've changed this year. I did three things and none of them were planned except the last: (1) quit eating bacon at breakfast, (2) quit reading news about celebrities, and (3) started starting my day with Bible reading and prayer. My 10yo DD is working on hanging up her towel after her bath but we are using a point system for her to help create the habit.

 

[SKL]

I can't say I've made much progress.  As far as personal physical well-being, I started Invisalign and walked somewhat more than last year.  I got back to doing TKD.  Most things are not yet to the point of being "habits" though.

I got a couple of medium-sized home projects done.

In general, I don't feel much better or worse off than last year.

[wintermom]

16 minutes ago, SKL said:

I can't say I've made much progress.  As far as personal physical well-being, I started Invisalign and walked somewhat more than last year.  I got back to doing TKD.  Most things are not yet to the point of being "habits" though.

I got a couple of medium-sized home projects done.

In general, I don't feel much better or worse off than last year.

I think some years are like that. There a life circumstances that make it really hard to be intentional about the things we choose. Sometimes we just have to react to what life throws our way.

Well done getting back into TKD! 

[WendyLady]

The first half of the year, my dh was deployed and I was both in survival mode and in take care of myself mode.  I started a few goals that stuck and a few that didn't...

I started reading scriptures daily in January and have stuck with it, and I am just about to finish the Book of Mormon for the 2nd time this year. With that and a class I am taking, I feel like I am in a really good place spiritually and have grown in my faith this year.  I plan to continue that next year.

I started tracking my spending in January and then set up a budget. This has been a huge blessing as we moved this summer and I stopped working and dd18 headed to college and my dh's paycheck has been a mess ever since - having a plan and a cushion has made a stressful time a little less stressful. We also signed up for a finance class this fall and that has really helped my dh with the transition home - when he was deployed I spent all the money, and it can be hard to transition to sharing finances!  But the little class has helped us both get on the same page and set some finance goals. Yay! I've just been using spreadsheets and a simple tracking app on my phone but I would like to buy YNAB to use. Maybe in January.

I cut out sugar in February and stuck with it through June. I lost about 25 pounds and felt really good and in control of my whole life!  But with the craziness of dh coming home, moving, college, living in a new area, loneliness, etc, I have completely fallen off the wagon and can't quite seem to get back on.  I have regained some of the weight and have felt like a failure this year.  It feels like December is not the best time to start, but it seems crazy to wait...

As we were preparing to move, I started looking in to going to school. It has been a life goal for many years, but has seemed impossible - we move so often, the last place we lived had very limited college programs, costs, things don't transfer, etc. Through the spring I began to research things, and actually started a couple of introductory classes this fall. I have enjoyed having something for me and feel like I can maybe do this! I felt brave to start, but now wonder why I waited so long!

At the same time this fall, I also signed up for a little certificate class and have completed it and will start a part time job based on that in January.  

I feel like I've had a year of growth and am glad that a few of my January goals have stuck through the year.  I am sad that I did not stick with my healthy eating plan, but seeing my other progress makes me feel like I have the strength to try again.  I haven't started to think about goals for next year but have been reading through Gretchen Rubin's book "Better than Before". I like her thoughts on goal setting!

[unsinkable]

33 minutes ago, Thatboyofmine said:

Does anyone have the link to last year’s goal setting post?   

You post in the one I started, bottom of page 1. But I think there was another thread, too, which I haven't found.

 

[KatieJ]

Hubby and I joined a gym just over a year ago. We go three to four times a week. We only miss when we are out of town or sick.

 

[Alicia64]

My New Year's Resolution was to join Toastmasters and begin to give speeches.

I found an awesome group and have stuck w/ it. I'm keeping to it even next year.

Alley

[Laura Corin]

I lost fifteen pounds at the beginning of the year and have kept it off with healthy eating and exercise. In the process I have achieved good blood ratios for the first time in decades.  I finally seem able to concentrate on yoga sessions at home, and have been stressing strength in my routines  To go with this, I've increased my lean protein intake.

I have also standardised my wake up time at 6.40, so that most days I meditate for twenty minutes before work.

I've been reading more and watching much less telly. Husband and I have been learning to enjoy our empty nest, trying out new things, saying yes to opportunities.

[Jaz]

I was able to complete some goals: 

DONE reusable water bottles 

DONE travel with dh more

DONE read 6 Christian books 

Understand the basic flow of World History

DONE make another couple friend 

DONE Konmari 2.0  (donated 51 bags so far, patio furniture, 2 bikes)

Word of the Year: Support

 

I don't know what resource to use to help me understand the flow of history. I'd still like to do that. This year, I tried youtube videos like crash course which I didn't follow through on. Any suggestions?

 

I'm seeing that I didn't do well on my word of the year in regards to my dh. Hmmmm....

 

A change that happened is I realized I need to prepare more for having an empty nest next year. My dh and I volunteer with a homeschool ministry and will be losing that activity which is a huge part of our lives. (It'll be healthier for the group for us to move on this year so other parents will step up). I'll be working but I'm not sure exactly what I'll be doing yet. 

 

Here are some things I've done to help myself with the empty nest process: 

Donated homeschool stuff as we've finished

Bible study with just my dd and me

Read Give Them Wings

Took several months to grieve the negatives including having to work

Joined an empty nesters class at church

Put more into our ministry to end well

Updated my resume

Took a part-time job

Kon-Maried our house

And still working on:

Putting together a photo book of the last 4 years

Praying through The Power of Praying for Your Adult Children

 

My goal is to finish strong and have "things" done so I can move into working. I see that my working friends don't have a lot of extra time so I want as many parenting-based projects, like photo books, completed as possible.

 

[lovinmyboys]

This year was not good on the goals front. We weren’t planning to move, but found out we were moving in March. Dh moved in May and the boys and I moved in July. So, from about March-October I was kind of in a funk. I’m still not happy about the move, but I am out of the funk.

On the bright side, my house is almost perfectly clean and organized. We moved in organized and have been able to maintain it. I have read 25 books this year, which has been my goal for the last few years. I usually end up with 27 or 28, but I am not ready to push to 30.

This next year my main goal is to make this area my community. Also, we put pretty much all of our savings into our down payment for this house. We told ourselves we would cut back and build savings back up. We didn’t do that this year-some of it was unavoidable as moving is expensive in ways we didn’t anticipate.  But next year we really are cutting back and rebuilding our savings. Like everyone else, I am wanting to exercise more too. 
 

One other problem area has been news. I get most of it from twitter before I go to bed. I didn’t realize it was affecting me until recently, but now that I know it is, I really need to drop the habit. I’m thinking about giving myself 10 minutes at lunchtime to look at it. Before bed it just makes me mad before I sleep. I stayed away from news for 10 years completely and it was very good for my mental health. When we went overseas Twitter made me feel connected to home and I haven’t dropped it. I really liked my life better when I didn’t know every terrible thing happening.

Edited December 2, 2019 by lovinmyboys

[Jaybee]

This has been a floundering year for me. I'm disappointed in myself. I have read 42 books so far, but a lot of them were empty calorie books rather than productive growth-producing books. I haven't lost any weight, and it is much needed. I'm not exercising regularly, though I started a few times. And so on. I don't like the lack of discipline I have shown this year. I'm struggling with working, because now that I've been doing it almost two years, I'm just not a fan, lol. When I come home, I'm tired and only want to waste time on the computer or binge-watch something. So I haven't really accomplished much this year. That's not the way I want to live, so this thread is a good wake-up call. I hadn't even thought about it until you asked the question, Quill, and now I'm thinking, "Wow, I need a kick in the pants and some goals!"

[Guest]

3 minutes ago, Jaybee said:

This has been a floundering year for me. I'm disappointed in myself. I have read 42 books so far, but a lot of them were empty calorie books rather than productive growth-producing books. I haven't lost any weight, and it is much needed. I'm not exercising regularly, though I started a few times. And so on. I don't like the lack of discipline I have shown this year. I'm struggling with working, because now that I've been doing it almost two years, I'm just not a fan, lol. When I come home, I'm tired and only want to waste time on the computer or binge-watch something. So I haven't really accomplished much this year. That's not the way I want to live, so this thread is a good wake-up call. I hadn't even thought about it until you asked the question, Quill, and now I'm thinking, "Wow, I need a kick in the pants and some goals!"

I am reading the book Atomic Habits right now (I just started reading it) and one thing I have seen born out this year is that if I can just make a tiny change, it produces fruit over time. When I first started trying to follow through on my yoga goals, I often made excuses; i.e., "Oh, I don't have time to do 20 minutes of yoga now, so I'll just skip it." But I started doing yoga, even if it was only 10 minutes. I think a couple of times, I even did just 5 minutes. 20 minutes seemed like an endless amount of time to "waste" on yoga at first. But once I made the tiny habit of just doing it, even if it's a small amount, it became easier to go 12 minutes, then 15, then 20. Maybe next year I will move on to 30 minutes, even. (Also, once I started using an App - Down Dog - that was recommended here, it also helped a LOT. I get easily bored, but the app prevents that by always being a new routine.) I'm now using the same baby steps approach to add in weights consistently. This morning, I did three arm exercises. That's not monumental. But it's better than zero! So, I am committing to doing just three arm exercises, alternating with just three leg exercises, six days a week. I will aim to move to five each, then maybe seven, in the future, but I am not going to call myself a failure for only doing 3. 3 beats none! So, even if it is just three, I will do it. 

I am also planning to go to work and I know that will impact my morning routine, so I'm sort of preparing for that. I have concluded that it is simply a must that I exercise in the morning, first thing. If I tell myself I will do it in the evening, I lie! I have no energy in the evening and, once dinner is over and we have cleaned up the kitchen, I feel I "deserve" my short window of time to relax. Trying to exercise at that point is like trying to move a mountain. I just cannot make myself! So, knowing this about myself, I make room for this in the morning. 

Not preaching at you; hope it doesn't feel that way. I'm trying to be supportive. 

[Jaybee]

3 minutes ago, Quill said:

Not preaching at you; hope it doesn't feel that way. I'm trying to be supportive. 

Not taken as preaching, you're fine. ❤️ 

[HS Mom in NC]

Oh, I forgot to mention my big fail: inviting each set of neighbors near us over for a meal in my home.  We got swamped with huge gardening projects for our food forest and didn't follow through with new to us neighbors because we were exhausted on weekend evenings, so we just hung out a few times with neighbors we were more familiar with.  So, new to us neighbors get put back on the list for 2020. 

[Garga]

I forgot about my accomplishments this year.  I posted earlier about my cluttered house and how I’m going to clean it one stick of furniture at a time for next year’s goal.  But here are my accomplishments from this year: 

In the last year, I lost 15 pounds by watching calories. I was completely unaware of how much overeating I was doing with my portions and not-so-good choices.  I stopped counting the calories a few months ago and have been able to maintain the weight I’m at because my habits have changed.

I started taking hapkido lessons in April and have progressed slowly but steadily.  I sorta don’t like taking the lessons because of inertia (they start at 8:15 at night and by then I’m TIRED), but I make myself go and once I’m there, I’m glad I got myself there.  It’s slowly dawning on me that I might actually be able to defend myself if I were ever attacked. That’s a good feeling, as I’ve often felt helpless in my life.  I’m still learning and my skills are shaky, but I’m getting there.

Edited December 3, 2019 by Garga

[Pen]

I’m also reading Atomic Habits. Well, listening as audio.  I’ve been through it more than once.

My biggest habit/goal accomplishment of the year was a shift from thinking in terms of goals over to thinking in terms of small habits that will add up toward goals. 

[PeterPan]

3 hours ago, Jaz said:

DONE Konmari 2.0  (donated 51 bags so far, patio furniture, 2 bikes)

You're blowing my mind! Wow!!!