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11 minutes ago, LucyStoner said:

 

Here Teaching Assistants are called IAs or paras and they get full benefits in FT roles (FT being 6.5-7 hours a day).  I’m going to bet though that while they are getting benefits in NY and WA, that might not be the case in MS.  

Also, heart has a 4 year degree which in MS qualifies her for regular teaching jobs rather than TA/IA/Para type jobs.  Those come with more pay and benefits and I would look to that route.  My brother has no college and one of the main draws of being a para besides the schedule (he works at his younger child’s school) is that here there are programs to help cover the cost of getting his degree (he wants to be a sped teacher).  

I would need to retake my ACT (score wasn’t high enough for a teacher) or an alternative test plus a Praxis test and log teaching hours for a year but I’d be paid as I accrued the hours as a student or w/e they call you. During that I guess I’d get an emergency certificate. But that’s all assuming I want to pursue a teaching certification at all. 

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11 minutes ago, HeighHo said:

 

Family friendly in this case means that the employee will have work hours that mean the employee can drop off and pick up a child from a nearby school or daycare and not be scheduled to work when school is not in session.  It has nothing to do with the employee's partner. 

A job such as Public Relations Assistant isn't family friendly because it is year round rather than just when school is in session, and it may be 8 hours a day, so childcare would be needed for those children arriving home earlier than quitting time.  That also means some of the family daycares won't be available as they only operate when school is in session.

I meant neither Dh nor I could drop her off. They expected me there for bus duty before 7 am iirc. The school was not close to anything and was like 45 min from my house so too early for me to drop dd off. 

Hypothetically if one of my kids wasn’t in the grades at that school they couldn’t be dropped off at their school that early, either. Here you cannot usually drop kids off before 7:30am?

Edited by heartlikealion
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Ah. 

Well PreK aged children are not allowed to ride the bus here with the exception of the Head Start children that ride the Head Start bus. As a CPST I’m fine with that rule. Children are not mature enough to sit still. I was prepared to drive dd to and from public PreK daily at the nearby school but they canceled the program. 

I believe the local daycare opens around 7 but it could be earlier. The sitter I know, I’m not sure what time she accepts children. One of her customers has work at 7:30 and all the children are from faculty/staff so I bet she doesn’t take kids before 7. Most jobs on campus start between 7:30-8. Dh’s library opens at 7:30 most days of the week. 

Many college students here do not have cars and certainly not cars with car seats for children. I would not send dd in a booster for a few more years. 

 

Edited by heartlikealion
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If you could get some VIPKID gigs, maybe it would help your resume for other things in future and help you to start getting things helpful to you: a MAC (I’d go with MacBook Pro for portability if it can do graphics you need)

and reliable transportation...

If you could get a newsmagazine like job maybe it can be flexible enough that you can get kids to daycare/school    

 

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I think if you could find a job you like, it could be good even if you only broke even on it financially at the start. (Because of daycare etc to do it)  But it could help toward future jobs and getting to do things you would feel happier doing, and getting to be around more people irl.   

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31 minutes ago, Pen said:

I think if you could find a job you like, it could be good even if you only broke even on it financially at the start. (Because of daycare etc to do it)  But it could help toward future jobs and getting to do things you would feel happier doing, and getting to be around more people irl.   

And I think it would be great for you to be around people who value you and aren’t constantly putting you down. I mean yeah there are those in every workplace too, but there are also positive affirming people. 

 

Its hard to remember that you’re worthy when your whole sense of affirmation comes from your husband and children, particularly your dh is not so nice. (Besides, it’s not our kids job to make us feel worthy)

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Dh was going through the bank account and asked me about some things. I said I also had questions (we were both stumped about a check and the image wouldn’t display). He said it might be the cookie dough he ordered. I said what?? He said someone’s kid in Girl Scouts. And he said he also bought a case of popcorn (money due in Nov for that one) from a family we know with kids in Boy Scouts. I’m just beside myself. How can you give me a speech about how we need to support these families when our checking account has six dollars?! He’s not certain the $36 check was cookie dough but he said he bought 2 tubs and figured we would use them over the holidays. I said I do bake over the holidays but I usually buy the case of mix from Sam’s or something (make from scratch or buy a small amount of dough). 

I just can’t. There’s no reasoning with this man. And here I felt torn about sending $5 to a dying friend’s go fund me recently. He doesn’t flinch over what was probably $50 in fundraisers for other people’s kids. 

 

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After ds sees the orthopedic dr and I settle on a bed I may ask my parents for help with that. I would pay them back but may ask them to help me fund the bed so Ds doesn’t have to wait so long. 

Ds doesn’t listen and Dh doesn’t enforce it much so he keeps sleeping on the chair in the living room. I send him to his bed (that’s directly on the floor of his room). Apparently he saw a spider the other night so refused to go back to his room. The appointment got pushed back to later this month through no fault of my own. The office had to move it. And the bed/frame I have in my cart went up in price. I hope they go back down. 

Funny or not so funny story about the campus maintenance stuff — a teacher I know said there’s a hole in her office wall that has gotten bigger and was told there’s a snake in there but maintenance dismissed it and said it won’t hurt her. Now she’s wigging out over every sound she hears. And her old building reportedly has bats. So yeah I guess that helps paint a picture about how maintenance handles things. 

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I’ve flipped out many times over the years lol I know I was pissed o we the kitchen aids. I was like this is *my* gift?? I didn’t even ask for it. You bought this for yourself. And you bought your mom one, too?! 

Yelling never really changed anything, though. On occasion I lost my s#it to make him hear me and it worked but probably only made me look crazy.

When we moved here we had just gotten off SNAP benefits and he was signing up for DISH satellite tv. I was like what?! No!! We do not need that. We need to save. I knew we wouldn’t get the first check immediately, either. It takes time to get moved in, buy things, etc. But he put his foot down and said he deserved/needed the TV for working here in the boonies with no entertainment. After a while the bills went up with DISH and it didn’t always work in bad weather. Our old box (forgot what it’s called but it’s legit and is intended for picking up some free tv) did not ever work here. He eventually canceled DISH. 

My son is getting a bed. End of story. Dh said I should put the old bed back together and buy a topper. I said the bed is old. It needs replaced. I did look at a topper in the store but wasn’t convinced it would help. I could get it as a temporary thing but Ds needs a firmer bed... will a piece of egg crate foam help at all?? It was $11 at the local dollar store. 

Also if we ever move to an apt the twin width will fit better than the queen. 

 

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1 hour ago, heartlikealion said:

Dh was going through the bank account and asked me about some things. I said I also had questions (we were both stumped about a check and the image wouldn’t display). He said it might be the cookie dough he ordered. I said what?? He said someone’s kid in Girl Scouts. And he said he also bought a case of popcorn (money due in Nov for that one) from a family we know with kids in Boy Scouts. I’m just beside myself. How can you give me a speech about how we need to support these families when our checking account has six dollars?! He’s not certain the $36 check was cookie dough but he said he bought 2 tubs and figured we would use them over the holidays. I said I do bake over the holidays but I usually buy the case of mix from Sam’s or something (make from scratch or buy a small amount of dough). 

I just can’t. There’s no reasoning with this man. And here I felt torn about sending $5 to a dying friend’s go fund me recently. He doesn’t flinch over what was probably $50 in fundraisers for other people’s kids. 

 

 

My son IS a Cub Scout and I wince to buy that popcorn from him because it’s so crazy expensive!  A “case” of it could easily be $50-60.  It’s hard to sell because the prices are outrageous.  The cheapest thing are bags of unpopped corn for $10-15.  The popped bags are $15-30 and the bins and sets are $40+  I have told them they need a $5 price point to really sell a lot.  

He’s shitty with money and wants to control the money.  That’s a bad combination.  I’m sorry he’s like this.  

 

 

Edited by LucyStoner
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At my brother’s school employer there is a tacit understanding that when staff has to arrive before allowed student drop off time, they can bring their school age children with them provided the children aren’t distracting them from their work.  My niece has helped my brother set up for AM arrival time.  Or she will just sit and read a book or play on her phone while my brother gets the computer lab humming.  It’s been like that at other schools I’ve been aware of as well.  At the alternative part time school for homeschoolers, students whose parents worked there would often be there before other students were allowed and they could stay on early release days when the teachers had training.   

Edited by LucyStoner
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He said he bought a case of unpopped? Said our kids get popcorn throughout the year from it. I said don’t they sell those individually in your vending machine? He said maybe for like .50 or so each. I brought up the vending machine because I thought if his point was for the kids to enjoy popcorn after hours in his library while watching the tv he could just ration it out by spending a little at the machine or buying at the grocery store. He argues that the family could use help etc. I was like you know what, so could we. (I do like that family but they chose to send 2 of their kids to the Catholic school and they have two FT working adults). Additionally, they chose to put kids in Boy Scouts. 

Dd is a spirited 4 yr old. She would most likely be distracting anywhere lol she’ll be school age next year, though so could maybe go to work with me and do art or something if I was in a school. 

Edited: to clarify I mean coloring sheets or something in the morning 

Edited by heartlikealion
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Oldest ds was a boy scout.  I found it was just easier on the kids to make a flat donation.  I don't buy popcorn because they get something like 30% of the total cost, with a percentage going into their scout accounts and the rest of that 30% to the troop.  (the rest of the money is split between manufacturer and council/national).  I will donate $5 to any kid who comes to my door and $10 to any troop/pack I see selling in front of the grocery store.  Same with girl scouts and any other kids' organizations.

It's a happy compromise between me buying overpriced stuff I don't really need and donating to a cause I want to donate to.

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I think it’s interesting he donated to these families but didn’t get any GS cookies this year from his secretary. He was on a diet I think. I ended up spontaneously buying a couple boxes one day in front of Sam’s club from a troop there iirc. That’s like $8 though not like $20+. Probably being petty here. 

I mowed today and took new pics. I don’t know if the chunk came from left or right side. Looks like the pvc part doesn’t go all the way in either direction. 

I told Ds and Dh I’d take ds on campus to do some one-on-one school today. Now Dh says he is planning on going school at his office today and probably soon (?!). He did not bring this up this morning that I am aware of. So annoying. It matters because I needed him to be with dd. 

I got my dates wrong on the festival. It was Thursday! So no ponies. 

 

685FC4F5-A35E-4818-AD01-EC0FC9918626.jpeg

Edited by heartlikealion
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Maybe you and Ds could do homeschooling on  a busy street corner with a can for donations and a cardboard sign that says something like:

“Help!  Need money for drinking water. Or unopened bottles of good drinking water. Every bit would help! Thank you! 

😉

Edited by Pen
To add a joking 🙃 emoji
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On 10/10/2019 at 3:47 PM, HeighHo said:

 

so rust color means the water is hard -- has lots of iron. 

If you remove the lid of the toilet tank, what does the bottom of the tank look like?

the thing with the dishwasher is  that it uses a lot of water at once...so it stirs up any sediment that has been sitting in the pipes. you have to let the water run if that happens. 

can you tell if the brown water is from the cold supply or the hot supply?

is the brown water only coming from bathroom tub faucet?

a cold water line does not need a fifteen minute flush: https://www.hunker.com/12335314/how-to-flush-water-pipes-in-a-home

 

I'm catching up.

re: the bolded.  it could also be the pipes.  I grew up in an early 60's house where we had that at times.   the water here is soft.

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47 minutes ago, Pen said:

So do you think there’s actually what looks from photo to be a 4x4” hunk size opening in your pvc pipe somewhere with water pouring out of it? 

I don’t know. They just said they broke it and would need to get a new pipe iirc. I didn’t speak directly to the guys. Dh did that night. I thought about putting a safety cone in my yard just for attention to it lol  

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41 minutes ago, heartlikealion said:

I don’t know. They just said they broke it and would need to get a new pipe iirc. I didn’t speak directly to the guys. Dh did that night. I thought about putting a safety cone in my yard just for attention to it lol  

 

Maybe they did, but just left a broken piece of plastic on your grass.

 I find it hard to believe you could have a missing hunk of pipe that big and not be getting either sewage smell if an outgoing sewage carrying pipe or a marsh in your grass or pond of water if an incoming water pipe were spewing out pressurized water from a huge hole 24/7.  Maybe call government water/sanitation department and have them check.  

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8 hours ago, heartlikealion said:

One father’s day? I gifted him a handheld KA mixer lol I can barely lift the stand KA mixer and I found a sale on the KA (only select colors) at Best Buy. He knew it was more for me than him but I think we have both used it. 

This is my favorite post of this thread. Totally a snarky, funny thing to do. I very much approve. 

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26 minutes ago, Pen said:

 

Maybe they did, but just left a broken piece of plastic on your grass.

 I find it hard to believe you could have a missing hunk of pipe that big and not be getting either sewage smell if an outgoing sewage carrying pipe or a marsh in your grass or pond of water if an incoming water pipe were spewing out pressurized water from a huge hole 24/7.  Maybe call government water/sanitation department and have them check.  

Don’t think they came back. I’m usually home during their work hours and they didn’t refill the hole. I know none of this makes sense. I’d ask questions but I’m basically out of touch with the right people and saying something through the grapevine again will apparently rub Dh the wrong way. I mean I could just openly ponder why there’s a hole in my yard in front of ds’ Sunday school teacher tomorrow. Her son is the school president. But I don’t know. 

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Last night I decided to focus on the bedtime routine instead of cramming in school. Kids got to bed at a decent time and everyone bathed. Ds wasn’t eager to get up for church but he does feel like he got adequate sleep for the most part. 

He attended Sunday school and I am doing some one-on-one work with him now. We just went over paragraph construction (mainly review but I don’t know what he learned). Now he’s looking for a pencil for his math in the parish hall lol I only have a pen with me. We might just head home in a minute. At least we had some peace and quiet. 

The religious sister suggestedsimething called mediation that is more counseling than legal?? I said I’m not familiar with that but I have little hope any mediator will help him see a problem. She does not actually know if that’s offered nearby. I told her I feel like there’s not much I can do other than save some money. 

Dd is so attached to both is us. I don’t even think she could handle a separation. She was crying for Dh to come to bed because she wants is both. The cat woke me up at 1:30 am and I had to open the office door that leads to the mud room so she could get to her litter box. Dh was still gaming. He said he would come to bed after doing homework. He fell asleep on the couch and I don’t know if he ever touched his homework. 

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16 hours ago, heartlikealion said:

Don’t think they came back. I’m usually home during their work hours and they didn’t refill the hole. I know none of this makes sense. I’d ask questions but I’m basically out of touch with the right people and saying something through the grapevine again will apparently rub Dh the wrong way. I mean I could just openly ponder why there’s a hole in my yard in front of ds’ Sunday school teacher tomorrow. Her son is the school president. But I don’t know. 

 

If you really think there could actually be a piece of pipe missing from your water line in or out as big as that hunk that’s a serious situation. It would deserve serious action.

 

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The picture is not big enough to really see but it looks like it may have been fixed with the rubber connectors.  Those are fine.  You would need to look and peel back the grass to see.  Otherwise, you would have sewage coming out and into your yard if was not fixed. They probably fixed it and just didn’t cover it back ( not uncommon lately, especially for a maintenance crew who is probably understaffed/has no budget). They should have covered it but since they didn’t you can do it.

Edited by itsheresomewhere
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18 hours ago, heartlikealion said:

Don’t think they came back. I’m usually home during their work hours and they didn’t refill the hole. I know none of this makes sense. I’d ask questions but I’m basically out of touch with the right people and saying something through the grapevine again will apparently rub Dh the wrong way. I mean I could just openly ponder why there’s a hole in my yard in front of ds’ Sunday school teacher tomorrow. Her son is the school president. But I don’t know. 

 

Maybe ask her if she knows anyone who knows anything about plumbing because you don’t know if you have a serious emergency health and sanitation risk situation or not. 

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19 hours ago, heartlikealion said:

Don’t think they came back. I’m usually home during their work hours and they didn’t refill the hole. I know none of this makes sense. I’d ask questions but I’m basically out of touch with the right people and saying something through the grapevine again will apparently rub Dh the wrong way. I mean I could just openly ponder why there’s a hole in my yard in front of ds’ Sunday school teacher tomorrow. Her son is the school president. But I don’t know. 


There is nothing to lose by getting in touch with the right people.  It would be weird to say something through the grapevine before contacting them directly.  And I know, I know, they deal with your dh and not you, but I think your string is being pulled here some.  What you say about them not talking to you makes absolutely no sense whatsoever from a legal standpoint.  Just because the employee is the one who usually deals with things does not mean a spouse, who is living in the home and dealing with all the home issues cannot contact maintenance.  If there was an emergency, what would you do?  Wait for the grapevine to work its magic?

If your email doesn't go through, call.  If your call doesn't go through, walk over there.  But someone is yanking your chain here.

Adding: And if that is their policy and not some malarky being fed to you, you need to get that IN WRITING.

Edited by HomeAgain
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Dh explained the pipe to me better today. He said they had to splint it on either side and then cut a piece of pvc in the middle? So what I’m thinking is nothing is actually leaking but their fix was meant to be temporary. The ground wasn’t saturated over there so that’s good. 

I sent kids to be around 8 and dd is still wide awake next to me. Dh will be home soon and she’ll probably get all wound up again. Gonna try to get her to sleep. I need kids on a good schedule. I reminded Ds to unload the dishwasher earlier. Just gotta keep reminding him and I’ll make a chart. 

Well that video I just watched was informative. Thanks. 

I’d love to take the wiring class they offer at the votech but Dh couldn’t be available consistently to watch kids without complaining he had homework, etc. Always good to learn new things.

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There isn’t a portal for maintenance requests. Dh sends an email. But they plan to add maintenance to the portal. Dh spoke directly to the boss of maintenance the other day (originally about an unrelated matter) and every work request Dh tried to mention was dismissed. “Maintenance is busy with Homecoming approaching” etc. 

So they are aware we’ve got a messed up lock on one door, a flood light and porch light never fixed, etc. 

My new motivation for getting a job is to live somewhere where I don’t worry about maintenance requests being brushed under the rug. 

I want 4 burners that work consistently on my stove, a second bathroom, a bedroom for each child, easier access to medical facilities, etc. We have outgrown this home.

Indeed updated me on a couple job apps. It said 60 people applied for the newspaper job, over 200 for the public broadcasting job, over 500 for a graphic design job... and no info on the mall job. Wow. 

I found another to apply to sometime this weekend. 

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24 minutes ago, heartlikealion said:

There isn’t a portal for maintenance requests. Dh sends an email. But they plan to add maintenance to the portal. Dh spoke directly to the boss of maintenance the other day (originally about an unrelated matter) and every work request Dh tried to mention was dismissed. “Maintenance is busy with Homecoming approaching” etc. 

So they are aware we’ve got a messed up lock on one door, a flood light and porch light never fixed, etc. 

My new motivation for getting a job is to live somewhere where I don’t worry about maintenance requests being brushed under the rug. 

I want 4 burners that work consistently on my stove, a second bathroom, a bedroom for each child, easier access to medical facilities, etc. We have outgrown this home.

Indeed updated me on a couple job apps. It said 60 people applied for the newspaper job, over 200 for the public broadcasting job, over 500 for a graphic design job... and no info on the mall job. Wow. 

I found another to apply to sometime this weekend. 

I've never had a landlord who was great with maintenance.

Can you fix any of that yourself, the lights maybe? The burners on the stove? Even as a renter there was always stuff I had to do myself and pay out of pocket. As a homeowner now of course it is all on me.

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We didn’t put in a request for the stove. It just messes up and when maintenance came here in the past for other things I showed them the stove and they just wiggled it or something and messed up again the same day I think. Dh said we need to take the whole thing apart and clean it better but I’m not sure. The wiring in the house sucks and I wouldn’t be surprised if the electric burner is related. 

We don’t own a ladder tall enough to deal with the flood light and I think the school supplies the bulbs if they fix it. The porch light we were told required something special and it was never dealt with. The man that looked at it passed away (long after looking at it) and his son is now the go-to guy but his son is also the one that said he made repairs on the home we were going to move into across campus and Dh and I have no idea if he really thought he was done or if he was given a modified list. The master bedroom ceiling there was still sagging. That home was not move-in ready. And it was a less safe area so we just stayed where we are. The appeal of the other home was extra bedroom & more bathrooms. But the toilets were low and they said they’d replace and didn’t. It was offered as no problem but not done. 

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1 hour ago, heartlikealion said:

What exactly do I need to buy for the range? I’m not understanding. 

I just want to live somewhere with up-to-date things.... things that would be up to code. I’m sure this home is far from modern codes. 

 

You would go get one of these:

https://www.amazon.ca/Frigidaire-316442301-Element-for-Range/dp/B005B9CUD0

But first I would switch spots with a burner that *does* work, to make sure it’s the problem, before buying a new one.

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I too would like easy housing, but...   

Houses can be very hard!!!  Hassles more than castles.   Still, way better than being out in the rain with none!!!!

We had hot water out of service for almost two weeks.  So nice to have it back!  

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