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What’s the biggest family your kids know?


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A mom at Church is expecting her fourth next month.  This will be *the* biggest family in my children’s social sphere.  (And we are Catholic!)  My husband was one of six, my mom was one of seven, but we have two and two is *so* common in our (urban, HCOL) world.  I know people still have big families, I enjoy reading about your big families here, but my kids don’t see them.  I imagine this varies widely, which is why I ask, what is the biggest family your kids know?  (I’m only counting my children’s peers, obviously they know they have lots of aunts and uncles, but those are grownups, not their generation.)

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7 person van  The van works OK with 2 parents plus 5 kids, then a bigger mode of transport is needed if there are more kids. 

When we were at the splash pad, I forget where you had walked off to, maybe pushing Benny out to the fountains, one of the ladies at the other table asked if we were a daycare group.  But of course, p

I’m just saying having a 7 passenger van didn’t stop us from having sex after baby 5 was born. 😉 Granted we didn’t actually get a 12 passenger van until after baby 7 bc our dodge caravan at the time s

Over the years that has varied and they might not remember some of the large families that they knew when they were little but have lost touch with. . So biggest ever was 12.  They might remember the family of 7 because that was more recent.  They currently know a family of 11 kids but they might not know that they are a family of 11 kids in that they only know the younger 6 because the older 5 are all adults and have been out of the house from before my kids knew them. 

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hmmm, well I am one of 9 so they know that family.  And each of them is going to be 1 of 6 soon.  But in our Catholic home school group there is one other family of 6, multiple families of 5, and my brother is expecting his 6th right when I'm due.  Off the top of my head I'm not sure if there are any ones larger than that but there very well could be

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hmm.I honestly have no idea. I just met a new family at youth group who have 9 children; 2 attend youth group with my youngest. I don't know if he knows them (they are new), and I don't know that even if he did become good friends with them, if he'd realize there are 7 other siblings in the family. 

Aside from that, my sister has 4 kids; another close friend family has 5 (although 2 are adults out of the house). 

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The largest families they know have five or are expecting their fifth, and it's well within the realm of possibility that some of those families will continue past five.

Oh wait, I forgot - one family at church has six at the moment (some are foster kids). So I guess that's the biggest right now.

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We have close friends with 10, but they don't live in our uber high COL area. The biggest local family we know is 5. When we moved from FL to CA, I was amazed how many comments and looks we got about our 4. In FL we were very average.

Thinking about it more, we are tied for the most kids in our church. Almost everyone has 2.

Edited by sassenach
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I have 3 kids, but we know several families with more than that. 

My youngest did gymnastics last year with 4 girls from a family of 11 kids; come to find out, that family attends my in-law's church, so they occasionally hear about them from MIL too. Currently, my middle does TKD. Two of the instructors are brothers who have 7 other siblings, so a family of 9 kids. We're doing an activity with a family of 6 kids this afternoon. 

4-6 kids is really common in the homeschooling world here, so they know lots of families about that size. 7+ is pretty rare. 

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1 minute ago, sassenach said:

We have close friends with 10, but they don't live in our uber high COL area. The biggest local family we know is 5. When we moved from FL to CA, I was amazed how many comments and looks we got about our 4. In FL we were very average.

 

Pretty sure the comments start at three in my zip code...

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3 minutes ago, Arctic Mama said:

Uh... I think it’s us.  I know moms with more kids, but not in day to day life.  We have like two more moms at church with six but since I’m expecting another that makes us the only family with seven, I believe.  One of the older ladies had six or seven, but her youngest is 16 and only two are at home and unmarried anymore. 

Yes, for us you are lol 😁

 

having said that, I am the oldest of 4 kids, I have 4 kids, my brother has 3, my sister has 2 and my other sister is currently pregnant with her second.   My extended family gets together often so they have no issues with large family groups.  

Edited by happysmileylady
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35 minutes ago, Jentrovert said:

They don't know any, very well, who have more than 3. Two is more common.

Same here. My boys know of a couple of families with six kids and one with seven, but they don't know any of those very well. More than three is unusual in our circles.

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We used to live in the same neighborhood as a family that ended up having 13. I don't know how well my kids remember them though. I come from a family of 7 and we have 7.  Another family we are friends with have 8.  We know a lot of families with 5 or 6. In fact, 5 or 6 kids in my circle seems more common than 3 or less. 

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LOL. Our own tops the list at 11. 

Outside of us, I think they “know of” a couple families in the 6-8 kids range. And know well several families with 5 kids. 

I don’t know what happens with kid 5, but it’s unusual for us to meet a family with more than 5 and when we do, it’s usually 7or8.  Once in a very great while it’s 9.  I don’t know any local families with 10 or more kids.

At this point, most people don’t know I have 11 unless they ask me. The oldest 5 are 18 and up, so are busy with their own lives, still living at home or not. So I only have 6 out and about with me regularly.

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My kids only know one family with 3 and the oldest was my DS14’s classmate in kindergarten. Don’t know anyone who has a 3rd child after 2009. When DS13 was in kindergarten, his classmates were only child or have only one sibling. My condo complex’s families has one or two kids as those with three has moved from condo to single family homes or large townhomes.

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1 hour ago, Lawyer&Mom said:

A mom at Church is expecting her fourth next month.  This will be *the* biggest family in my children’s social sphere.  (And we are Catholic!)  My husband was one of six, my mom was one of seven, but we have two and two is *so* common in our (urban, HCOL) world.  I know people still have big families, I enjoy reading about your big families here, but my kids don’t see them.  I imagine this varies widely, which is why I ask, what is the biggest family your kids know?  (I’m only counting my children’s peers, obviously they know they have lots of aunts and uncles, but those are grownups, not their generation.)

 

4.  There is one family in our sphere that has 6 but I don't think either of my kids are aware they have 6 kids.

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Definitely not over 5. Two or three is typical here. Housing in the area is typically newish (at ~35, ours is an "older home") and costly, probably driving larger families to farther-flung locations or discouraging people from having more than fit comfortably in the house. Three is the most in our little neighborhood AFAIK. None of my close friends has more than two.

Nobody in our family has had more than 5 since the 1940s. DH is one of two; his parents are one of three and one of four; his aunts and uncles don't have more than two IIRC (and they're Catholic). I'm one of my mom's five, but that's with three different dads; my parents are one of two and one of four, and none of their siblings has had more than two. One of my cousins has four in a blended family.

 

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I know several people who have upwards of five kids or more - typically because Mom had a kid or two as a teenager or a very young adult, and then had the rest in her late 20s to mid-30s. But afaik my kids only know two families with four kids and a handful with three.

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There is a family at our church/school that has a lot of boys - at least 5, but I think it is more.

We know a number of families (friends/relatives) with 4 kids.  There may be other families we know that have >4 kids, but they don't come to mind immediately.

My parents had 6 kids, and many in their generation had 5+, but I am not counting them when I think of families my kids know.

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In our parish, we have a family with 7 children.  In the past, we have had families with 8 children, but they moved to a lower COL area.  

My only child is grown now, but IIRC, we tended to hang around with smaller families, mostly because when he was young, we were in a different world where most families were 1-2 children.  Our parish now, I would say that most people who are "done" having their children have at least 3, but there are three families with 4 and two with 5.   We have had 11 babies in the past 3 years, more than half of them first children, and most of those born within a year of marriage.   :0). It's zone defense at church. 

 

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Well, a family we are very close to is expecting #9 later this year. And we are fairly close to a couple families from our church with 8. (Is there where I mention all of these families are Catholic?)  Oh wait, a high school babysitter we use is from a family of 9 or 10 I believe and they aren't Catholic.

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Their own, lol! Although we don't think of ourselves as a big family (13 kids) which is strange. We'll see someone with 5,6,7 kids and think, "Wow, they have a lot of kids! Oh, wait..." There is another family in town with 14 and another with 19 (yours/mine/ours kind of thing).

It's kind of nice where we live because no one blinks at families with 6 kids or even 7. So we're not all that strange...well, maybe we get a few, "Wow!!" comments here and there.

I remember being told after #4 that we wouldn't be able to have more children and again after #7. Definitely learned to not take things for granted...

Edited by BakersDozen
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What is bizarre to me — I have 3 kids but they are close in age (a set of twins plus an older brother) and I was asked *all the time* if I ran a home daycare, when they were younger.  *All the time*. At the park, the library, swimming, the grocery store, etc.  *All the time.*

Edited by Lecka
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3 minutes ago, Lecka said:

What is bizarre to me — I have 3 kids but they are close in age (a set of twins plus an older brother) and I was asked *all the time* if I ran a home daycare, when they were younger.  *All the time*. At the park, the library, swimming, the grocery store, etc.  *All the time.*

 

I have four now, but when I had 3 - same as yours with twins and an older brother - I had people ask me if "all" the kids were mine.  Once, I even turned around to see if there were other kids behind me because I couldn't figure out why someone would ask that.  

Biggest family my kids know would be 6-7, but my paternal grandmother had 18 children.  

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8 minutes ago, Lecka said:

What is bizarre to me — I have 3 kids but they are close in age (a set of twins plus an older brother) and I was asked *all the time* if I ran a home daycare, when they were younger.  *All the time*. At the park, the library, swimming, the grocery store, etc.  *All the time.*

When I went out with just my twins and their older brother (13 month age difference) I was asked the same thing. I would laugh, thinking of the kids I didn't have with me. Maybe it's just seeing a bunch (if 3 is a bunch, lol) of littles all together?

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2 hours ago, Murphy101 said:

LOL. Our own tops the list at 11. 

Outside of us, I think they “know of” a couple families in the 6-8 kids range. And know well several families with 5 kids. 

I don’t know what happens with kid 5, but it’s unusual for us to meet a family with more than 5 and when we do, it’s usually 7or8.  Once in a very great while it’s 9.  I don’t know any local families with 10 or more kids.

At this point, most people don’t know I have 11 unless they ask me. The oldest 5 are 18 and up, so are busy with their own lives, still living at home or not. So I only have 6 out and about with me regularly.

7 person van 

The van works OK with 2 parents plus 5 kids, then a bigger mode of transport is needed if there are more kids. 

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On the home daycare — I would make kids share who were hogging trains at the train tables at the library (my kids would be all over the train tables), and I would just nicely direct some random kid ————— and then if that kid was hogging something at another table, I would have parents approach me to see if I was responsible for that kid, to let me know about something going on at another play table.  People would just think that was one of my daycare kids.  

Nope. No home daycare.  Just my own kids and saying something to other kids who tried to take all the trains.  

I always felt like I might need that too if I was busy with one kid and not sure exactly what another one might be getting up to.  

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9 minutes ago, Arctic Mama said:

And I almost never get asked that??? Maybe it’s the area or I just have a dirty look on my face.  

When we were at the splash pad, I forget where you had walked off to, maybe pushing Benny out to the fountains, one of the ladies at the other table asked if we were a daycare group.  But of course, put yours and mine together and there are 9 of them lol.

 

 

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That is so funny!!!!!!!!

I think part of it for me was I usually had two in a stroller and one holding onto the stroller.  I think we looked like a daycare group.

I also had a couple of times I talked to a woman with a twin stroller and it turned out she had one kid plus one kid she was babysitting.  

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23 minutes ago, Arctic Mama said:

Ha!  It must be the look on my face then, nobody ever asks me that, even out with friends?  Maybe I just look really stressed? 😆

Maybe you just look more approachable.

I dunno, I don't think you look particularly stressed or unapproachable or anything.   It was the first time I had ever been asked with my 3, I just figured it was probably just cause with all our kids together, it makes for a pretty large group under age 13.

 

One thing I do get asked all the time is if my girls are twins.  

Edited by happysmileylady
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47 minutes ago, unsinkable said:

7 person van 

The van works OK with 2 parents plus 5 kids, then a bigger mode of transport is needed if there are more kids. 

 

Yep!  It's the 7 person van.

 

We have 7 (#8 in progress).  We are the largest family the kids know by a mile, but we don't get out much.  We're not religious, so no church families or anything.  Our extended family is not big on kids; I've heard that we're ruining the environment, etc. (hah) and SIL says regularly to her one female child, "aren't you glad you don't have brothers?" when our boys are being any sort of loud at all.

The pressure to not have more kids has been strong since number 2 at least.

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