Jump to content

Menu

Would you consider this racist?


Recommended Posts

I was at my chiropractor's office the other day and he was chatting while adjusting my back. We were talking about how hot it has been and he mentioned that he and his wife went down to the local beach for a walk. Then he said "While we were walking we realized we were literally the only white people on the beach! I felt like I was in Jamaica or something!"

We do live in a predominately white area .... only in the last 10 years or so has it started to diversify, so if you grew up in this area (like he has) then you may notice that there is a more diverse population than in the past.

Then I started to think that if he said "While we were walking we realized we were literally the only old couple on the beach. I felt like I was in Cancun on Spring Break!"  Or he could have said "we were the only old people on the beach, everyone there was a family with little kids" and neither one of those statements would have been bad.

I usually try to make some kind of comment if I feel someone is saying something racist, but I didn't want to reprimand him if he was just making an innocent comment.

So what say you?

 

Edited by Home'scool
  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Replies 131
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Posts

I don’t know for sure if it’s racist or not, but I wouldn’t have said it in a million years.  Something about it sounds off to me.  Saying that you felt like you weren’t in America anymore because you

Sure. If you insert the words "retard" or "fat slob" the precise same logic holds.  It will be heard more acutely by some than others; some barely register it at all.   What is different abo

I would listen to *how* he said it, if there was a derogatory undertone.  It doesn't sound like that was his intent.  Thousands of people (of all nationalities) choose Jamaica as a happy place to go f

I would listen to *how* he said it, if there was a derogatory undertone.  It doesn't sound like that was his intent.  Thousands of people (of all nationalities) choose Jamaica as a happy place to go for vacation.  I would take it as an observation, not a racist statement.  If he had said he felt like he was in Ferguson during the riots, or something along those lines, or indicated he felt threatened in any way, or called the people something derogatory, that would be different.

I just got back from a three week road trip through parts of the south and the midwest.  I commented to my dd that I had never been so surrounded by white people.  I am biracial (Hispanic/White) and I live in New Mexico, where the population is very diverse.  It felt strange to see so many white people, and not see any hispanics or native Americans, anywhere.  My comment wasn't racist, just an observation.  

  • Like 17
Link to post
Share on other sites

Since you did not mention his tone, I assume he was just making an observation about what he saw.  I don't think that's racist.  If the tone implied that it was a shame there were so many black people or whatever, then that might be racist.  I said "might," because he also might be sad that white people choose to avoid areas where black people are prevalent, which IMO would be a non-racist feeling.  So it's hard to say from just reading the words.

Noticing skin color is not racist.  Noticing patterns related to skin color is not racist.

  • Like 4
Link to post
Share on other sites

As a person of color, I would be offended.  I had a very similar situation happen to me and it offended me.  I was walking down the boardwalk with basically 10 of my family members and I heard someone murmur, "I feel like we are in China or something."  As an Asian person (not Chinese), I know what that women meant and it wasn't an innocent comment.  So yes, that person was being offensive/racist.  Lumping a whole group of people as being from one island is stupid and offensive.  

  • Like 11
  • Thanks 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

My first thought was that yes, it was a racist comment. But  in reading the entirety of your post I'm not convinced it was. I think stuff like that is all about the intent. Some things really can simply be observational or descriptive, with no other intent or purpose.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

But what is the implication if its racist?

Noticing that the people around you are not the same demographic you usually see is racist?

It's ok to notice it, but you have to pretend you don't and not mention it?

You aren't supposed to notice the demographics of the people in Jamaica?  Or you just aren't supposed to mention it?

I've known people to complain that there are too many of a certain race in a place, or to make it clear from their tone or context that their comment is meant to be taken that way.  But surely noticing a change, and mentioning it, doesn't imply racism.  

I don't think telling people they have to behave as if they don't see what they see is a good policy for a society.

  • Like 12
Link to post
Share on other sites

I think it may be an observation that the person suddenly felt like he stood out in the crowd - a feeling people of any color can have, but which probably doesn't happen very often to this particular chiropractor.  Having had that feeling myself, I can say it's similar to suddenly noticing that you are the only person in jeans where everyone else is in a suit.  Some instinct says "maybe I'm not supposed to be here," but rationally you know that's not so.  I think it's a natural feeling and not related to a feeling of superiority, which is what racism is.

Edited by SKL
  • Like 13
Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, SKL said:

I think it may be an observation that the person suddenly felt like he stood out in the crowd - a feeling people of any color can have, but which probably doesn't happen very often to this particular chiropractor.  Having had that feeling myself, I can say it's similar to suddenly noticing that you are the only person in jeans where everyone else is in a suit.  I think it's a natural feeling and not related to a feeling of superiority, which is what racism is.

 

Yes, this.  I imagine it is not a feeling one gets used to.  

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, Bluegoat said:

But what is the implication if its racist?

Noticing that the people around you are not the same demographic you usually see is racist?

It's ok to notice it, but you have to pretend you don't and not mention it?

You aren't supposed to notice the demographics of the people in Jamaica?  Or you just aren't supposed to mention it?

I've known people to complain that there are too many of a certain race in a place, or to make it clear from their tone or context that their comment is meant to be taken that way.  But surely noticing a change, and mentioning it, doesn't imply racism.  

I don't think telling people they have to behave as if they don't see what they see is a good policy for a society.

Yeah, I know that a lot of people in the majority culture here in the USA say things like this. 

What do you think of a 90 year old man that still calls African Americans by the old offensive word negro?  It's very offensive but some will argue that the old man doesn't mean any ill.  So?  It's still offensive.  If the chiropractor made a remark like, "oh, I noticed the demographics of the area have changed quite a bit.  It's interesting how much it's changed."  This is quite different from saying, " wow!  I felt like I'm in Jamaica!"  

  • Like 7
Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, Suzanne in ABQ said:

 

Yes, this.  I imagine it is not a feeling one gets used to.  

Well yes, I've felt this way for much of my life actually.  The difference in the example given by SKL is that you can't take your skin color off like a pair of jeans.  

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites

I don’t know for sure if it’s racist or not, but I wouldn’t have said it in a million years.  Something about it sounds off to me.  Saying that you felt like you weren’t in America anymore because you see a majority of black people makes it sound like you’d only expect to see white people in America.  It somewhat implies that black people ought not to be here.  

Without tone, the words themselves seem to indicate “when I see a lot of black people I feel like I’m no longer in America because black people can’t also be true Americans.”  

Perhaps I’m reading more into it than was meant, but that’s how the words themselves come across to me.  Tone could have changed it.  I would never say something like that because it’s too close to racism and I’d want to steer clear.

 

(Edited: infer/imply mistake!  Doh!)

Edited by Garga
  • Like 26
  • Thanks 4
Link to post
Share on other sites

I think if it's a comment about the perceived race of others, that a white person could only "get away with" making privately to another white person, it's racist and should go unsaid.

I don't think he meant to be harmful but it would be nice if he wouldn't act like a 3yo on tour. "Wow, look at all the black people! We are the only white people! When I get home, I will tell my friends!"

 

  • Like 11
Link to post
Share on other sites

"Yes, I love that our area is getting so much more diverse! It's so much more representative of all Americans now than it used to be, isn't it great?"

If he meant it in a bad way, he'll take the hint and shut up. If he didn't, he may realize how it came across but you haven't actually accused him of anything.

Edited by Tanaqui
  • Like 8
Link to post
Share on other sites

I'd say that it's "borderline" -- which usually means that I make an agreeable-sounding remark that makes it clear that I consider diversity a good thing.

The reason it's "borderline" to me is the combination of these two negative factors: (a) he noticed the racial demographic of the situation and considered it noteworthy enough to remark on it, and (b) his comment implied that the 'natural' place to find so many black people is someplace where they are the majority population -- like 'that's where they come from' -- implying that "here" is not where they come from, not where they naturally occur or where they belong. In combination with various positive factors, including: (a) It was said as an observation without overt or implicit sense that being among so many black people was 'a bad thing' -- it was not phrased as a complaint, (b) the connotations of Jamaica are generally positive, and it is possible that he was legitimately reminded of an actual experience he had on a vacation there (he did not, for example, say 'Africa' or name a struggling African nation), (c) he doesn't have a track record of similar remarks.

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites

I get the impression this is the first time that he has felt like a minority in his home setting.  If I were to interpret his words generously, I also get the sense that he is rather clumsy in how he expressed that.  It would REALLY matter HOW he said that.  It comes across as being very racist in different tones and settings.  I would hope that I would never say something that insensitive ever. 

While there are parts of the US where I live and fit into the majority culture, there have been many times when I have been in the minority culture. It *is* something that you get used to, and it gives you a lot of empathy for those who have to live with the looks, comments, and judgments every day.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

I would have perceived it, rightly or wrongly, as a “testing the waters” attempt to see how racist he can be without getting called on it. White people saying they don’t feel like they are in America because so many black people are around is well over the line for polite chit-chat IMO. I would put good money on him expecting a “white people bonding” moment where you briefly commiserate on how different things are (unstated implication being not different in a good way) before moving on to other topics. 

 

  • Like 11
Link to post
Share on other sites

Most people notice if they're the only person who looks like them in any given situation.  I don't think most people are thrown by it to the extent that, days later, they bring it up to a random customer in a professional situation. It was a weird thing to do and I'd be afraid of where that conversation could lead if he was encouraged.

  • Like 7
  • Thanks 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
20 minutes ago, Garga said:

I don’t know for sure if it’s racist or not, but I wouldn’t have said it in a million years.  Something about it sounds off to me.  Saying that you felt like you weren’t in America anymore because you see a majority of black people makes it sound like you’d only expect to see white people in America.  It somewhat implies that black people ought not to be here.  

Without tone, the words themselves seem to indicate “when I see a lot of black people I feel like I’m no longer in America because black people can’t also be true Americans.”  

Perhaps I’m reading more into it than was meant, but that’s how the words themselves come across to me.  Tone could have changed it.  I would never say something like that because it’s too close to racism and I’d want to steer clear.

 

(Edited: infer/imply mistake!  Doh!)

It's not that he saw black people and felt like they aren't Americans, it's that he was the ONLY white person there, which is unusual in much of the US.  He did not imply that in a mixed group he does not feel at home.  (Though maybe he does feel that way ... we don't know.)

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites

Dude, he said "It's like Jamaica", aka "Being around so many black people is not the same as being in America". The obvious implication is that black people aren't REAL Americans and that he doesn't feel at home around them.

He may have intended it in a bad way or not, but you can't twist his words to say he didn't mean what they actually say.

  • Like 5
  • Thanks 4
Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, Tanaqui said:

Dude, he said "It's like Jamaica", aka "Being around so many black people is not the same as being in America". The obvious implication is that black people aren't REAL Americans and that he doesn't feel at home around them.

He may have intended it in a bad way or not, but you can't twist his words to say he didn't mean what they actually say.

Still disagree.  What he's saying is that being on a beach where everyone else is black feels like being in a beach resort where most of the people are black.

Nobody in the USA considers black people to not be Americans.  Jamaica was about black people and beaches, not citizenship.

Edited by SKL
  • Like 4
Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

Nobody in the USA considers black people to not be Americans.  Even the founding fathers would not have thought "other country."

 

You are 100% wrong on both those counts! Check out the history of Liberia if you have a chance, would you?

Also, you may think you're clever editing out the word "REAL" like that, but there's a reason I put it in there.

  • Like 6
Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, Tanaqui said:

 

You are 100% wrong on both those counts! Check out the history of Liberia if you have a chance, would you?

Also, you may think you're clever editing out the word "REAL" like that, but there's a reason I put it in there.

We'll have to agree to disagree.  (PS I had edited out the founding father stuff before I saw your reply.)

Edited by SKL
Link to post
Share on other sites
21 minutes ago, KungFuPanda said:

Most people notice if they're the only person who looks like them in any given situation.  I don't think most people are thrown by it to the extent that, days later, they bring it up to a random customer in a professional situation. It was a weird thing to do and I'd be afraid of where that conversation could lead if he was encouraged.

 

Yes, yes, people notice. Who is "most people"? I typically say such things only to people I think would be receptive and understanding RE: my discomfort...even days later. I imagine the chiropractor felt the same. Being uncomfy and in the minority is my norm tho, especially in groups of military officer spouses.

Edited by Sneezyone
  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

I've had black people mention to me that they were the only black person in the room.  It is what it is.

The Jamaica comment could go either way.  If he had something like "the hood," it would be a bit more obvious.

Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, SKL said:

We'll have to agree to disagree.  (PS I had edited out the founding father stuff before I saw your reply.)

 

This is not an "agree to disagree" situation. The facts are against you. Every time some bigot says "Go back where you came from!" that's somebody, an American citizen, who believes that certain other Americans aren't REAL Americans due to their race. Every time they say "Where are you really from?" they mean "People who look like you aren't REAL Americans." And every time you say "This place didn't have my expected ratio of white people, therefore it was like being in a foreign country", they mean "White people are REAL Americans, everybody else isn't."

Fact: There are a nonzero number of people in the USA who think black people aren't Americans.

Heck, you don't have to take my word for it. If you've got a strong stomach you can visit Stormfront and see for yourself.

Edited by Tanaqui
  • Like 11
  • Thanks 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
4 minutes ago, Tanaqui said:

 

This is not an "agree to disagree" situation. The facts are against you. Every time some bigot says "Go back where you came from!" that's somebody, an American citizen, who believes that certain other Americans aren't REAL Americans due to their race. Every time they say "Where are you really from?" they mean "People who look like you aren't REAL Americans." And every time you say "This place didn't have my expected ratio of white people, therefore it was like being in a foreign country", they mean "White people are REAL Americans, everybody else isn't."

The history and attitudes about American-born black people are distinct from those of the "go back where you came from" variety. 

If the chiropractor had been talking about people with Indigenous American looks, and said "I felt like I was in Tijuana," this would be a whole different conversation.

Edited by SKL
Link to post
Share on other sites
6 minutes ago, SKL said:

I've had black people mention to me that they were the only black person in the room.  It is what it is.

The Jamaica comment could go either way.  If he had something like "the hood," it would be a bit more obvious.

 

I agree that it could go either way...if it were said TO ME. I do not necessarily have the same feeling when a white person is speaking to another white person ISO a solidarity/sympathy/commiseration moment.

Edited by Sneezyone
Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, SKL said:

The history and attitudes about American-born black people are distinct from those of the "go back where you came from" variety. 

 

No. They are not. See Muhammed Ali, Kaepernick, Tommie Smith and John Carlos.

  • Like 6
Link to post
Share on other sites
24 minutes ago, Jentrovert said:

I would have taken it to mean that the only other place he personally had experienced being the only white person in a large group of people was in Jamaica. 

Eta: "Place" wasn't the right word here. I mean that the only other time in his life he had that experience was while on vacation in Jamaica. 

 

I definitely agree this is a possible meaning. Which is why my default response to this sort of thing is, "Is that a bad thing?" I have never gotten used to the discomfort of being alone in a group but asking this question usually makes it clear (by their physical reaction or words) whether they define the issue as an internal or external one. For me, personally, that makes all the difference. *I* may be uncomfortable and find the situation remarkable. That doesn't mean there's anything *wrong* with those around me.

Edited by Sneezyone
  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
13 minutes ago, CuriousMomof3 said:


That's how most racism works.  We live in a racist society.  There is a tide of bias that runs through it, and carries us all along.  Some people are intentionally racist, of course, and that is very problematic, but most racism doesn't come from people who mean to be hurtful, it comes from people who have lived in a racist segregated society and think of it as normal and then make decisions that continue things as they are.  

I don't think this man was necessarily "a racist", except in the sense that  some degree of unconscious racism is something that is baked in the soul of most Americans.  But his actions reflect a perception that his experiences are the norm.  If he is going into the voting booth with that perception, or hiring at work with that perception, then it can have negative consequences for people of color, even people of color he might like and treat well as individuals.  

It's not about the fact that he noticed that it was different than his norm.  It's about the fact that his association was with another country.  He didn't say "I went someplace and everyone was black, and I realized 'Oh, this is what a lot of our country is like'".   I live in an area where being the only white person is more common than being in a setting with only white people.  When I go somewhere where I am surrounded by white people, I notice.  But I don't think "Oh, it's like Sweden", because I know that what I am seeing is a part of America.  

I once went skiing in Utah, and stuck on the baby slopes because I had my kids with me.  When I came back, I still had the ski tag.  I was at work, and a black man I did not know came up to me and showed me he had the same tag.  We chatted and we had been at the resort the same week!  He said "I wonder if we crossed paths", but I knew that we hadn't because I had been so aware of the fact that everyone was white that I know I would have noticed him (I still remember seeing a black man at the rental car counter and feeling like "I'm almost home").   I just said "That would depend on how good a skier you are, I had my 5 year old so we stuck to the greens." and he laughed and admitted that he was a more skilled skier and probably didn't ski any of the same slopes.  

 

While I appreciate the anecdote, agree about systemic racism, and have felt similarly many times, I can't afford to be this scrupulous when I talk to people. I would, literally, have no friends. LOL. People often phrase things in less than ideal ways and mean little/no harm. I learned early on to suck in my breath and make my eyes REALLY big and innocent before asking clarifying questions. If I pretend to be really stupid, people either stammer about correcting themselves or shut up and refrain from sharing their racist thoughts with me. In either case, I'm good. That said, the stress of playing these folks like fiddles will probably shave 10 years off my life.

Edited by Sneezyone
Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Garga said:

I don’t know for sure if it’s racist or not, but I wouldn’t have said it in a million years.  Something about it sounds off to me.  Saying that you felt like you weren’t in America anymore because you see a majority of black people makes it sound like you’d only expect to see white people in America.  It somewhat implies that black people ought not to be here.  

Without tone, the words themselves seem to indicate “when I see a lot of black people I feel like I’m no longer in America because black people can’t also be true Americans.”  

Perhaps I’m reading more into it than was meant, but that’s how the words themselves come across to me.  Tone could have changed it.  I would never say something like that because it’s too close to racism and I’d want to steer clear.

 

(Edited: infer/imply mistake!  Doh!)

That’s how it reads to me, too. 

FWIW, I have heard comments like this and they are never said in innocent observer mode. (Not saying he definitely means it negatively, but that has been my experience in other cases.)

A similar comment I heard before, “We went and looked at that college, but I don’t know...there’s a lot of black people there.” 

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
45 minutes ago, CuriousMomof3 said:


Why?  Why do you consider the implication that someone isn't an American, to be less offensive than the implication that they come from a certain neighborhood?  

The idea that some people are "less American" can be incredibly damaging.  Recently an American citizen child was held in custody overnight because someone thought she didn't "look American", or match her passport card.  Adults have been held in detention for months.  So the idea that certain people are "less American" is not a harmless one.  

I'm assuming he didn't put that much thought into it and wasn't thinking about country borders but rather race demographics.  Of course I could be wrong, but living in the USA for 52 years does give me some sense of what words and sayings mean.

I'll agree it wasn't the best choice of words.  But all we know is that he & his wife were the only white people on the beach, he noticed it, and it made him feel odd.  He compared it to another situation he remembered where most people on the beach were black.  Of course that was not necessary for him to do; seems he had some diarrhea of the mouth, but we cannot tell whether the root of it was racism IMO.

Edited by SKL
Link to post
Share on other sites
4 minutes ago, CuriousMomof3 said:


I didn't say I'd have told the man making the comment that he was racist!  I'm answering the question that was asked, which was whether I thought the comment was racist.  I wouldn't have said a word in real life.  

 

I'm, obviously, not saying the guy is a racist either. I'm saying there's not enough info. I tend to give PoC the benefit of the doubt in their social interactions but (honestly speaking) I don't trust white people in America (as a group) to assess situations/statements accurately.

Edited by Sneezyone
  • Like 4
  • Thanks 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, SKL said:

It's not that he saw black people and felt like they aren't Americans, it's that he was the ONLY white person there, which is unusual in much of the US.  He did not imply that in a mixed group he does not feel at home.  (Though maybe he does feel that way ... we don't know.)

 

“It’s not that he saw black people and felt like they aren’t Americans”?  Then why did he say he thought he was in Jamaica?  He flat out said that he thought he was in a foreign country.  

17 minutes ago, CuriousMomof3 said:

It's not about the fact that he noticed that it was different than his norm.  It's about the fact that his association was with another country.  ....  When I go somewhere where I am surrounded by white people, I notice.  But I don't think "Oh, it's like Sweden", because I know that what I am seeing is a part of America.  
 

This

  • Like 7
Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, SKL said:

So far I have not seen anyone say that a comment is racist but the person who said it might not be racist.

I guess that could be a whole other discussion.

 

Context and tone are everything IMO. We don't have much of either.

There are people who found the comment racist. There are also people who said the racism of the speaker couldn't be determined based on a single comment. There is also some overlap between the two and an outlier...me.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
11 minutes ago, SKL said:

So far I have not seen anyone say that a comment is racist but the person who said it might not be racist.

I guess that could be a whole other discussion.

 

We have had this discussion many times before, and by "we" I specifically mean that both you and I have participated in this discussion. You can have some degree of racial bias or unfortunate opinions - both conscious and subconscious - without having any particular animosity towards people of other races.

At this point it should not be necessary to spell that out for you EVERY SINGLE TIME. Even if you refuse to believe that the above is the case, you certainly have ample evidence to know that other people believe it, and to understand that this is the position they're speaking from.

Edited by Tanaqui
  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, Tanaqui said:

 

We have had this discussion many times before, and by "we" I specifically mean that both you and I have participated in this discussion. You can have some degree of racial bias or unfortunate opinions - both conscious and subconscious - without having any particular animosity towards people of other races.

At this point it should not be necessary to spell that out for you EVERY SINGLE TIME. Even if you refuse to believe that the above is the case, you certainly have ample evidence to know that other people believe it, and to understand that this is the position they're speaking from.

That is not what I said.  Anyway, I would rather not continue this with you.  I was reacting to someone else's post.  You and I disagree, I get it.

Link to post
Share on other sites

The question to me is would it be ok to say this statement in front of people of color?  I'm guessing many POC would NOT be ok with this being said.  POC MAY hear stuff like this all the time and I see why they find it grating and would at least consider it a microaggression.  I would be uncomfortable if someone said this to me.  And I present as white.  

In general, I hope people of color would step forward on this thread and let us know their read.  At the end of the day, I don't think Caucasian people get to decide what is and isn't racist.  

I do agree with @CuriousMomof3 on not knowing if the guy is racist.  You  can unintentionally say something considered racist without intending to do so.  

21 minutes ago, StellaM said:

Having said that, the iffy bit of the OP's example was the 'I felt like I was in Jamaica or something'. That's editorialising on top of the observation. Why would a person not say, instead, 'my area is becoming very diverse'. I agree that situating Jamaica as the place brown people naturally are is a bit off. 

To be clear, this is what is problematic.  An observation like "Our area is sure more diverse than it was 10 years ago." is fine.  

 

 

Edited by FuzzyCatz
  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
13 minutes ago, StellaM said:

My kids' dad would not feel this was a microaggression; people of color are not a monolith. Which means, of course, that equally a person of color might consider it a microaggression, and that's their valid experience also. 

 

I wouldn't necessarily identify it as a micro aggression either, hence the clarifying questions. My DH lets a lot of things roll off his back that I would not. I suspect that is because he has been both desensitized and visible in a way that I have not. He was born and raised in an area of the US where this would be the least of your concerns WRT racism. I was not. He is also in an environment where these sorts of issues/concerns are unwelcome topics for discussion. His survival instinct is strong and providing for his family and getting along with everyone is his priority. Behind closed doors, however, we are a lot more alike than not.

Edited by Sneezyone
Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, Tanaqui said:

Dude, he said "It's like Jamaica", aka "Being around so many black people is not the same as being in America". The obvious implication is that black people aren't REAL Americans and that he doesn't feel at home around them.

He may have intended it in a bad way or not, but you can't twist his words to say he didn't mean what they actually say.

 

I think that's not the way someone would normally interpret a comment like that.  There are a heck of a lot of assumptions and logical leaps your've brought in there and placed on this guy.

 

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...