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I admit I have a few types of people I am envious of, but right now, I am the most envious of those who do not have trouble sleeping.  I am a super light sleeper, can't sleep well often, and I am super envious of those who can sleep with noises happening, movement of a spouse or people in the room, basically anyone who is a great sleeper and can sleep wherever/whenever.

How about you?  What are your envies?

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I envy people who can wake up bright and early, prioritize well, do all their work without a million distractions, and then have time for guilt-free personal time before drifting to sleep at a reasonable hour.

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I envy people who are high or normal energy. I have always been a very low energy person and, even when hormones and thyroid are doing great, need more sleep and downtime than average. I could accomplish so much more with an extra 3 hours of productive time each day. 

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I envy people who can focus on their work/hobby/current task without being interrupted over and over and over and over. 

Bonus envy if their non-existent interruptions do not have a periodic "Oh, I'm sorry, am I interrupting you?"

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1 hour ago, SKL said:

I envy people who can wake up bright and early, prioritize well, do all their work without a million distractions, and then have time for guilt-free personal time before drifting to sleep at a reasonable hour.

Oh man, this is me.  Added with the sleeping ability - I swear it must be a super power.   

Writing this after having had a terrible night of sleep and only wanted to be a blob in front of the TV today.   It's almost 3 and, so far, I've done 15 min of Yoga and gone out to lunch with my dad.  I'm killin' it today.  😉 

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I envy parents who can send their kids out into the world with minimal anxiety. I’ve heard people say, “Oh, it’s so great when you send your kids off to college because you don’t have to lay awake and worry about what they’re doing and how late they’ll be out.” And I wonder - how do you do that? Because I’m still worrying, people!! This parenting-of-young-adults thing is kicking my butt!

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I envy my own younger self who had high energy and who could never gain enough weight no matter how much I ate that doctors put me on special diets for weight gain. I was so physically active that it was hard to get enough calories in. But now, I struggle with losing even 5 pounds and insomnia makes me gain more and I am on a diet to lose weight as exercising is becoming hard. 

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I am also envious those whose entire head space isn't wrapped in up food. You would have thought those of us lucky enough to live in a world (personal - not at large) where hunger isn't an issue could have evolved past thoughts focused on when to eat, what to eat, how much to eat. I have eaten so why am I still thinking about food?

I'm also extremely envious of those who live near their grandchildren.

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42 minutes ago, Selkie said:

I envy parents who can send their kids out into the world with minimal anxiety. I’ve heard people say, “Oh, it’s so great when you send your kids off to college because you don’t have to lay awake and worry about what they’re doing and how late they’ll be out.” And I wonder - how do you do that? Because I’m still worrying, people!! This parenting-of-young-adults thing is kicking my butt!

 

ME TOO!  And a student of mine just lost her 22 year old sister in a boating accident yesterday, which just raises my anxiety level even more.

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I’m envious of people who like kids, not just their own.  Oddly enough, the hardest part of homeschooling so far for me has been the willingness to deal with other people’s kids.  I don’t want to teach/watch/talk to/invite/spend time with kids, unless they are my own, but sometimes I have to.  And it’s harder than it should be.

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53 minutes ago, StellaM said:

I envy people whose kids don't struggle with mental illness, and people who own their own beautiful home. So much of what brings me down is related to my kids' struggles and housing issues. Mostly I am just envious of those people for their ability to make good decisions that led to their 'luck'.

Kids mental health is a huge deal for sure.... it sometimes I feel shallow for caring about my home. Living in a fixer upper for the last 7 years has really affected me. So I get it. 

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I relate to everything about anxiety and young adult kids but my big one is: 

I envy adults with moms.  It is almost exactly 25 years and I miss her so much. 

Dh visited his mom in another state recently and I felt like I could die of jealousy.

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10 minutes ago, happi duck said:

I relate to everything about anxiety and young adult kids but my big one is: 

I envy adults with moms.  It is almost exactly 25 years and I miss her so much. 

Dh visited his mom in another state recently and I felt like I could die of jealousy.

YES! Mines been gone 8 years and I so wish she was stull here.

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I envy people with even, organized focus. Mine is all over the place. Sometimes I'm hardcore on. Other times I struggle to get anything done at all.

But also the moms who can speak softly and kindly all the time. I am just so blunt. I know it's not always good for my kids.

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I am a super light sleeper. I take hours to fall asleep. I wake up repeatedly. I also have a weight problem. I just gain weight. I hate hate hate it when people smugly say it is as easy as watching your food intake vs your exercise. It is not. I have had where I was on a 500 calorie a day diet and worked out 4 hrs a day, as in, serious work out, and still gained. So no, it is not about food intake vs outtake. I also have lung problems and I envy people without. And people who have these big families and plenty of people to spend time with on holidays and such.

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9 hours ago, Æthelthryth the Texan said:

I envy those Moms that can always speak calmly and softly to their kids no matter what the kids are doing. 

The question is, how do those kids turn out?

I'm actually serious.  We have created a world, at least in certain communities, that doesn't push back when kids are being annoying, weird, or worse.  What effects does that have long term?

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Close families where everyone is supportive and gets along and enjoys spending time together. My extended family is small and even when we get together for holidays it is short. Like people will drive two hours just to eat dinner and rush off. I’d like to think my kids will be different as adults but I’m not sure. 

Definitely the stuff about struggling with weight. of course I would love to be able to stay slim but I am also envious of larger ladies who don’t let it bring them down and who can just accept that they are bigger.

 

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I envy religious people, who have a built-in community when they move to a new place, a ritual social gathering they can participate in weekly with communal singing, and a sense of place in the universe that is hard to replicate with secular groups.

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29 minutes ago, EKS said:

The question is, how do those kids turn out?

I'm actually serious.  We have created a world, at least in certain communities, that doesn't push back when kids are being annoying, weird, or worse.  What effects does that have long term?

One of my dh’s bosses has a wife with a voice that is like gentle rain all the time.  So soothing but at the same time she does actually parent their 3 small children (1, 3 and 5).  I would like to be a fly on the wall to see if she ever yells.  

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14 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

One of my dh’s bosses has a wife with a voice that is like gentle rain all the time.  So soothing but at the same time she does actually parent their 3 small children (1, 3 and 5).  I would like to be a fly on the wall to see if she ever yells.  

I have a family member like this.  It is amazing.  Her kids have turned out fine.  I don't know if they yell at their kids or not. I don't see them much anymore.  

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Gosh, I have a long list.  

Like others have mentioned, I envy people who do not have children with mental illness.

I envy adults who do not struggle with mental illness.

I envy people who feel accepted and valued by their family of origin.

I envy people who are glass half-full types ... who can see the positive in any situation rather than obsess about everything that could go wrong because experience has told that Murphy's law is true.  

I envy people who have the energy and self-discipline to get halfway through their to-do list without an imposed outside structure.

I envy people who have the mental energy and fortitude to declutter and get rid of things.  I feel guilty about all the stuff we have that we don't need or have room for, but I just can't find the energy to deal with.

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What an interesting question...

I "envy" people that can learn and retain languages easily.  My parents immigrated when I was a baby, and I no longer use the language of my birth.  It makes me sad.  I've also learned more than a few languages over the years and .... have forgotten them all.   I stink at languages.

 

 

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1 hour ago, EKS said:

The question is, how do those kids turn out?

I'm actually serious.  We have created a world, at least in certain communities, that doesn't push back when kids are being annoying, weird, or worse.  What effects does that have long term?

When I seconded it, I was definitely not picturing parents who have no boundaries or pushback. Rather, parents who can do it without ever yelling, losing their cool, nagging, pushing way too hard... I know some really strict (and some not so strict parents but who still have clear boundaries) who just never break their calm parent persona. I’m not constantly yelling or nagging or anything. But I do go too far and do those things sometimes and have to pull myself back.

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At this time every year I find myself fighting really ugly envy toward those who have parents/grandparents, etc. who gift them money. Not a loan, no strings attached. Just a gift of funds for home school curriculum, extracurricular activities, etc. Seems most of my friends have someone in their life who offers to pay for one activity for each kid each year. Another gets $500/kid for school stuff from her parents. Another not only gets money but a month-long vacation at her parent's place in Idaho (gorgeous estate) each summer. Her kids play while she relaxes and plans for the coming school year.

I also envy those friends (ironically, the same ones with the wealthy family members) who have family involved in their lives in a healthy way.

Yeah, I envy those people big time.

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15 hours ago, DawnM said:

I admit I have a few types of people I am envious of, but right now, I am the most envious of those who do not have trouble sleeping.  I am a super light sleeper, can't sleep well often, and I am super envious of those who can sleep with noises happening, movement of a spouse or people in the room, basically anyone who is a great sleeper and can sleep wherever/whenever.

How about you?  What are your envies?

Actually, I am with you on this one. I am such a light sleeper and I have trouble falling asleep. Some nights I feel like I forget how to fall asleep and I lay there for hours and hours with my brain thinking about everything all at one time. No matter what time I fall asleep, I wake with the sun in the morning. So frustrating.

So, yeah, I envy those who can sleep and especially those who can sleep in.

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6 hours ago, solascriptura said:

What an interesting question...

I "envy" people that can learn and retain languages easily.  My parents immigrated when I was a baby, and I no longer use the language of my birth.  It makes me sad.  I've also learned more than a few languages over the years and .... have forgotten them all.   I stink at languages.

 

 

 

I know the wording was a bit off, and maybe I should have said, "What do you wish you had/could be like" but I just went for the envy word! 😁

And as far as languages, I have a friend who is so gifted at learning languages that he can literally meet anyone in the world, even if they don't speak any English, and can have enough grasp of their language within an hour that he can have semi-conversations with them.  Give him a week or two and he can have some real conversations.  He is absolutely amazing.  I have never met anyone like him.  

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Oh, and get this (sleep issues related).  

Yesterday I spent a lot of time on the phone making doctors appointments for me and the 3 kids, trying to get us all to the dentist, eye doc, and physicals, and one to therapy before I have to go back to school.  I made multiple days' worth of appointments, etc.....and I had me down for 8am eye doc today (Thur).

I got some news last night that had me up thinking and thinking and thinking until after midnight.   

I got up at 6 to shower and get ready.

Just remembered they called me yesterday to change it to the same day/time as my kids and said they could squeeze us all in, so I didn't have to get up early at all this am!

ARGH!  

But now youngest has a dental appt at 9:30 so I can't go back to bed, and besides, my mind is racing.

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14 hours ago, fairfarmhand said:

I envy people who don’t have mentally ill family members. 

On a lighter note, I envy People who   Can stay slim easily.

 

Right there with you on both, although I know people have far deeper mental illness issues in their family than I do.  

And slim?  Sigh, I just hope to get down into the "overweight" category right now.

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So many bits and pieces of what others have mentioned!  But mostly, I envy the people who can juggle responsibilities well. I can do things well, but I drop other, equally important things to do so.  I envy people with solid emotional support systems. And I envy people who can find the sweet spot between being “friends” with their kids and being a hard@ss. I tend to veer hard!

I also envy people with excellent health care benefits and those who purchased their homes after the real estate bust!

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I know one of those never-yellers. She's amazing. She has more than twice the number of children that I have, and darn it if they aren't all lovely and mild mannered too! They are very strict in many ways but seem to enforce their boundaries with kind, measured voices and coaxing discussions. The children - some adults now - are all helpful, so kind, great playmates with every other child. Oh, but don't assume they are all doormats with no personality! No way, they - parents and kids - have strong opinions and love a good meaty discussion, they are just so loving about it all.

I am, in contrast, an absolute ogress...

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I envy people who are naturally organised and able to live productive lives 😄

I'm allergic to busy. More than 1 or 2 things a day and I need a lie down! My sister in law and best friend are like that, they're up at 6am with a skip in their step and have accomplished 6 impossible things before breakfast. I need a lie down after reading their 'what did you do today' texts 😄

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My youngest is almost 17 and I've never yelled at her.  I think I've only yelled at one of my four kids and I deeply regret it.  He's an Aspie and I didn't know it until he was a teen and I let him get to me at times when I should have remained calm.  People (including my own kids) have always commented on how patient I am with my own kids and others (when my kids were in ps I volunteered in the classrooms a lot).  I don't notice it because it's just who I am but it's been mentioned to me many times.  

 

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1 minute ago, Kassia said:

My youngest is almost 17 and I've never yelled at her.  I think I've only yelled at one of my four kids and I deeply regret it.  He's an Aspie and I didn't know it until he was a teen and I let him get to me at times when I should have remained calm.  People (including my own kids) have always commented on how patient I am with my own kids and others (when my kids were in ps I volunteered in the classrooms a lot).  I don't notice it because it's just who I am but it's been mentioned to me many times.  

 


I have had to apologize to my Aspie over and over again.  I didn't know he was an Aspie and I would get so mad at him, and it was horrible now that I look back.  

I remember once I told him he had to sit in the living room, on the sofa, until he apologized to me for being a pain (and he had been!) and he sat there for 8 hours!   I would go in and ask if he was ready to apologize and he would cross his arms and look away.  I did let him read and draw (and eat and use the bathroom) but he refused to say he was sorry.

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I'm envious of those who can maintain a good weight w/o enduring significant, constant hunger.

I'm envious of people who aren't zapped by socializing. A lunch or dinner out with a friend is great, but wipes me out so much I need 24 hours or more to recover. The recovery time makes me shy away from socializing, and that's not good.

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Sitting in the dentist office waiting room with a mom speaking softly.  Unfortunately it isn’t working.  The child in whining and whining.  it Has been going on for 30+ minutes.  Poor mom is breastfeeding baby and trying to get other child to not whine and act out.

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1 hour ago, Shellydon said:

Envious of those that can lose weight. 

 

Definitely!  When I was within a semi normal weight range I never touched certain foods and I was hungry a LOT!  I can’t seem to do that anymore.

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