WWYD? Car Accident...

[Joker]

Ds was dropped off by a friend late tonight. We have a neighbor who has a ds who often parks directly behind our driveway. There is no car in their driveway and it bothers me that he never parks there. I grew up in a big family and we often had to move our cars so it's just weird that he never parks in the actual driveway. I have almost hit his car several times myself. He was not only parked in the street but he was parked in the wrong direction.

Tonight, ds' friend did hit the car. No one would come out of the house so, since it was late, the driver just left a note that an incident happened and left their information. Should we go over in the morning and talk with them or just wait and see what happens? I feel sick at the idea that this could affect this young person negatively when it is something that I, in my 40+ years, have almost done many times. I am now going to start being annoying when it comes to this stuff in my neighborhood. 

[kiwik]

I would just ring my insurance company and get things sorted so I could just hand over the claim number to them to give to their insurance company.  If he left a note firmly under their windscreen or in their letter box they should have got it.   If the weather has been bad and it might have blown away I guess the driver could check they got it 

Edited June 28, 2019 by kiwik

[kiwik]

And did he take photos?

[Joker]

Just now, kiwik said:

And did he take photos?

We took lots of photos.

[Catwoman]

Did you call the police so they could file a report and also ticket the illegally parked car?

[Joker]

1 minute ago, Catwoman said:

Did you call the police so they could file a report and also ticket the illegally parked car?

Friend called their mom and they said to leave just a note. Not what we advised but is what happened. Lights came on in the house and they obviously knew what was happening so we all just took lots of pictures. It all just stinks and I hate it. 

[Catwoman]

1 minute ago, Joker said:

Friend called their mom and they said to leave just a note. Not what we advised but is what happened. Lights came on in the house and they obviously knew what was happening so we all just took lots of pictures. It all just stinks and I hate it. 

 

It’s so weird that they didn’t come out! 

Do you think they were worried because their car was parked illegally?

I’m sorry the friend’s mom didn’t want to get the police involved. 

[Joker]

2 minutes ago, Catwoman said:

 

It’s so weird that they didn’t come out! 

Do you think they were worried because their car was parked illegally?

I’m sorry the friend’s mom didn’t want to get the police involved. 

It is weird. I think the friend's family was just freaked out. i'm going to call the non emergency number tomorrow and if it is for sure illegal here, then I will start calling. I will let the neighbor know I am doing it. It all stinks

[J-rap]

Try not to worry about it too much.  Unfortunately, these things do happen.   I'd probably pop over to the neighbor's house in the morning and talk to them about it, and let them know that you'll file a police report.  But wait -- was there damage done?  I'm assuming so.  Then yes, a police report.  Unless for some odd reason they tell you no.  Perhaps for some reason they don't want the police involved, and you can just let it go.  If they do (which I'd assume!), you can always apologize for your child's friend while at the same time encourage them to park on the other side of the street, or in their driveway!  

The day my dd got her driver's license, she drove to her music lesson by herself and then backed out into a car parked right next to the driveway.  Ugh.  It was a severe lesson, but given everyone had insurance, everything turned out fine, everyone got over it.  It'll be fine.

[Shoeless]

Was your son the driver?  Were any of your cars involved in the accident?  If your insurance policy is not involved in this accident, I would probably drop it and let the two (presumably) insured parties sort it out.  It seems like both parties directly involved in the accident prefer not to involve the police and just handle the problem themselves, so I'm not sure why you'd file a report that no one wants?    

 

[klmama]

You said the neighbors wouldn't come out.  Did someone knock on their door?  If not, you're just assuming they knew that what was happening involved their car and didn't care to come outside.  Even if the car was illegally parked, your dc's friend is still responsible for hitting it.  He should have gone to the door, but at least he left his number.  Hopefully, they can settle this easily.  I don't think you should get involved other than possibly to make sure the neighbors got the note.  

[easypeasy]

That stinks for ds's friend. We, too, have a neighbor who parks right behind our driveway on the street when he could park in his own driveway. I have no idea why he does it and it's annoying as all get-out. But, yet. There he is. Every day. It's not illegal in our neighborhood to park on the street and he's technically in front of his own house, so there's nothing we can do about it. But it does make backing out of our driveway tricky and when we remember, we remind visitors to look for his car when backing out.  Since our kids have friends over, I've just been waiting for the day when one of them is going to smash into his bumper...

[fairfarmhand]

Here if there’s no police report insurance won’t get involved.

[QueenCat]

1 hour ago, happysmileylady said:

I think that unless one of your cars was involved, or your DS was driving, this isn’t your circus.  I do think that someone should have gone to knock on the door last night but that ship has sailed now and the kid did leave his contact information so it’s now between the parties actually involved.  

Now I do have one question....you say this car is usually parked “directly behind” your driveway.   Was the car in any way partially blocking your driveway?   If it was, I think it then that does have you involved and also does probably place the parked car more at fault.  

 

Very valid point. It will make it more complicated for a party to act when it wasn't their car or driver. In fact, this very well might frustrate either party's insurance company, should they become involved. Taking the pics, etc. last night was good but the rest needs to be on the friend and  his parents. 

[PrincessMommy]

my daughter did this once when she was babysitting.  It wasn't a bad hit, but she did dent it.   She left a note and took some pictures (the car was already in bad shape).  She heard back from the car owner several days later, and he was very laid back about the whole thing.   He never even took her insurance or asked for cash or anything.  I think he figured, "What's one more." 

My other daughter, on the other hand, lightly tapped a Mercedes bumper at a stop light.   Barely a scratch on that thing.. .but it cost us $1100 to repair.  

 

[SKL]

Honestly, I would not worry about a little fender bender.  Are you sure it is illegal to park there?  If so, make sure the young driver informs the insurance company of that fact.

My feeling is "that's why we have insurance."  It's a pain and a learning experience.

[Frances]

8 hours ago, MissLemon said:

Was your son the driver?  Were any of your cars involved in the accident?  If your insurance policy is not involved in this accident, I would probably drop it and let the two (presumably) insured parties sort it out.  It seems like both parties directly involved in the accident prefer not to involve the police and just handle the problem themselves, so I'm not sure why you'd file a report that no one wants?    

 

In my state that would be illegal, unless the damage is very minimal.

[sassenach]

9 hours ago, Joker said:

It is weird. I think the friend's family was just freaked out. i'm going to call the non emergency number tomorrow and if it is for sure illegal here, then I will start calling. I will let the neighbor know I am doing it. It all stinks

I don’t think this is your place. The 2 parties actually involved can take it from here. 

This is not a huge deal. Teens get in fender benders (or worse) all the time. Two of my teen drivers have managed to rear end someone/total out their cars and it has not been the end of the world. 

You might actually make it worse for the teen if you report it and the DMV gets notified. 

 

[Joker]

I was never going to report anything. I simply called and asked about parking in the street. Now I know that here it is not legal to do so overnight. I'm going to make sure neighbor is aware of that fact and if they keep parking behind our driveway I will start reporting it. I'm staying out of it other than that.

ETA: When I called I did not discuss the accident. I simply called as a resident asking a general question about the legalities of street parking in our neighborhood.

Edited June 28, 2019 by Joker

[Pen]

3 minutes ago, Joker said:

I was never going to report anything. I simply called and asked about parking in the street. Now I know that here it is not legal to do so overnight. I'm going to make sure neighbor is aware of that fact and if they keep parking behind our driveway I will start reporting it. I'm staying out of it other than that.

ETA: When I called I did not discuss the accident. I simply called as a resident asking a general question about the legalities of street parking in our neighborhood.

 

I think you should also make the teen who backed into the parked car aware of this. 

[Katy]

Well maybe the teen will stop parking there.

One of my neighbors children has severe ASD.  He's often at his home with various teachers and therapists instead of at school, which must be part of his IEP because it changed to this in the past 6 months.  One of the teachers who came over daily used to park at the end of my driveway and smoke before and after going into the house. Sometimes illegally blocking my driveway, sometimes on the other side of the street, always annoying.  One day when he was sitting there smoking away, ignoring the fact that I was trying to back out into the narrow street with my giant Yukon XL,  I backed out and nearly hit him when he was sitting in the car. His eyes nearly bugged out of his head.  He stopped parking there and parked in front of the neighbor's house for a few weeks.  Then he stopped showing up at all.  I think it's safe to say everyone was relieved.  The neighbor boy calmed down dramatically after that guy was replaced.  We're now much more likely to hear him singing than screaming.

[sassenach]

3 hours ago, Joker said:

I was never going to report anything. I simply called and asked about parking in the street. Now I know that here it is not legal to do so overnight. I'm going to make sure neighbor is aware of that fact and if they keep parking behind our driveway I will start reporting it. I'm staying out of it other than that.

ETA: When I called I did not discuss the accident. I simply called as a resident asking a general question about the legalities of street parking in our neighborhood.

Ooh, sorry, I misunderstood!

[SereneHome]

6 hours ago, Joker said:

I was never going to report anything. I simply called and asked about parking in the street. Now I know that here it is not legal to do so overnight. I'm going to make sure neighbor is aware of that fact and if they keep parking behind our driveway I will start reporting it. I'm staying out of it other than that.

ETA: When I called I did not discuss the accident. I simply called as a resident asking a general question about the legalities of street parking in our neighborhood.

I wouldn't even bother reporting it, I would call the towing company and ask them to tow an illegally parked car

Ask me how I know that it can be done.....my BF had to pay $100 one time to get my car out  when I was visiting him over overnight bc one of the neighbors called tow truck

[Joker]

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Edited June 28, 2019 by Joker

[Farrar]

I think it would be fine for you to pass along the information to the poor kid who accidentally hit him that the car was parked illegally and let him and his family decide what to do with that. As it's your neighbor, I wouldn't do it.

This reminds me of a situation when I was working at this small school that was in a church building. Despite us repeatedly pointing out to the church secretary that the kids used the parking lot to play games in during break and lunch, she absolutely insisted on parking her car right in the middle of the lot. It was a giant lot that was basically empty. The teachers always parked around the ring so it would be this huge expanse with one car in the center. Eventually, the inevitable happened. A kid put a football through her passenger window. Sigh. And it was like, yeah, that was bad, but... why did she keep risking it. She could see the kids throwing the football and playing around on skateboards with her car in the way, easily could have been parked a few feet away - in the shade, no less! And yet... Sigh. People are so weird.

[Garga]

Tell the kid who hit the car that the car was parked illegally. 

Do not contact the neighbor tomorrow.

Let the two parties work it out themselves.

[kiwik]

On 6/28/2019 at 4:59 PM, Catwoman said:

Did you call the police so they could file a report and also ticket the illegally parked car?

How is it illegal to park on the side of the road opposite someone's driveway?  I know it is annoying as I have had the same problem but here at least it is legal to park on the side of the road if there are no markings forbidding it.

OK.  It is illegal to park on the street overnight?  Why?  Would it block access to a hospital or something?

Edited June 29, 2019 by kiwik

[Joker]

Neighbors actually drug us into it as we were unloading groceries yesterday. It did not go well. In the end friend was only asked to pay a small amount and neighbor parked his car in the driveway last night. So, that's good and I'm sure the rest will blow over soon enough. 

[Katy]

4 hours ago, kiwik said:

How is it illegal to park on the side of the road opposite someone's driveway?  I know it is annoying as I have had the same problem but here at least it is legal to park on the side of the road if there are no markings forbidding it.

OK.  It is illegal to park on the street overnight?  Why?  Would it block access to a hospital or something?

 

Many neighborhoods and cities restrict street parking. It's a way to keep property values up by limiting the amount of adults who live at any given house.  At least overnight.  It also helps emergency vehicles access homes on narrow streets.

Edited June 29, 2019 by Katy

[alisoncooks]

1 hour ago, Joker said:

Neighbors actually drug us into it as we were unloading groceries yesterday. It did not go well. In the end friend was only asked to pay a small amount and neighbor parked his car in the driveway last night. So, that's good and I'm sure the rest will blow over soon enough. 

That sounds like the best outcome for the young friend. I'm sure the neighbors realized that being parked illegally might limit their recourse with the insurance companies!

[Farrar]

5 hours ago, kiwik said:

How is it illegal to park on the side of the road opposite someone's driveway?  I know it is annoying as I have had the same problem but here at least it is legal to park on the side of the road if there are no markings forbidding it.

OK.  It is illegal to park on the street overnight?  Why?  Would it block access to a hospital or something?

In addition to the whole look of the neighborhood thing mentioned above, it generally means that people can't leave broken cars on the street, which is good for the streets (they often leak oil, for example) and keeps people from using the street as storage. It can also be to stop vagrancy (aka, people sleeping in their cars) or people using the neighborhood to store commercial vehicles - both of which I've seen happen in neighborhoods.

[sassenach]

7 hours ago, kiwik said:

How is it illegal to park on the side of the road opposite someone's driveway?  I know it is annoying as I have had the same problem but here at least it is legal to park on the side of the road if there are no markings forbidding it.

OK.  It is illegal to park on the street overnight?  Why?  Would it block access to a hospital or something?

Some cities have ordinances about street parking. The neighborhood I grew up in was like this and it was a total PIA. At one point we parked a car on our lawn, and that was fine, but on the street would have gotten a ticket. I can tell you which looked trashier!

Our neighborhood now is stacked with street parking, but 99% of us have 1 car garages/driveways, so we'd be up a creek if it didn't. It can look crowded but it's not a big deal to me.

[Wheres Toto]

Around here a lot of towns don't allow overnight parking from November through April so if there's snow, they can plow easier.  Larger towns/cities don't allow it due to street cleaning. 

[Reefgazer]

On ‎6‎/‎28‎/‎2019 at 12:37 AM, Joker said:

Ds was dropped off by a friend late tonight. We have a neighbor who has a ds who often parks directly behind our driveway. There is no car in their driveway and it bothers me that he never parks there. I grew up in a big family and we often had to move our cars so it's just weird that he never parks in the actual driveway. I have almost hit his car several times myself. He was not only parked in the street but he was parked in the wrong direction.

Tonight, ds' friend did hit the car. No one would come out of the house so, since it was late, the driver just left a note that an incident happened and left their information. Should we go over in the morning and talk with them or just wait and see what happens? I feel sick at the idea that this could affect this young person negatively when it is something that I, in my 40+ years, have almost done many times. I am now going to start being annoying when it comes to this stuff in my neighborhood. 

He may have good reasons for not parking in the driveway.  One of our cars can't go in because it bottoms out when leaving/coming in the driveway.  I wouldn't get involved; it's not your accident.

Edited June 30, 2019 by Reefgazer

[Reefgazer]

On ‎6‎/‎28‎/‎2019 at 10:46 AM, Joker said:

I was never going to report anything. I simply called and asked about parking in the street. Now I know that here it is not legal to do so overnight. I'm going to make sure neighbor is aware of that fact and if they keep parking behind our driveway I will start reporting it. I'm staying out of it other than that.

ETA: When I called I did not discuss the accident. I simply called as a resident asking a general question about the legalities of street parking in our neighborhood.

I'm confused.  Is he blocking our driveway, or just directly across the street from our driveway?  Is it illegal to park on your street? 

[kiwik]

9 hours ago, Where's Toto? said:

Around here a lot of towns don't allow overnight parking from November through April so if there's snow, they can plow easier.  Larger towns/cities don't allow it due to street cleaning. 

That makes sense.  So does no parking on narrow streets - usually we have markings for that.  But a lot of houses have no off street parking so there is not really any option.  I know of subdivisions that have covenants but that is not law so the police wouldn't care.  The police here also don't expect to be involved unless there is traffic obstruction, an injury or damage to property other than the car (though not just bumping a fence).

[kiwik]

16 hours ago, sassenach said:

Some cities have ordinances about street parking. The neighborhood I grew up in was like this and it was a total PIA. At one point we parked a car on our lawn, and that was fine, but on the street would have gotten a ticket. I can tell you which looked trashier!

Our neighborhood now is stacked with street parking, but 99% of us have 1 car garages/driveways, so we'd be up a creek if it didn't. It can look crowded but it's not a big deal to me.

Well if you have 4 adults sharing a house you are likely to have 4 cars.  Very few places have off street parking for 4.

[EmilyGF]

44 minutes ago, kiwik said:

That makes sense.  So does no parking on narrow streets - usually we have markings for that.  But a lot of houses have no off street parking so there is not really any option.  I know of subdivisions that have covenants but that is not law so the police wouldn't care.  The police here also don't expect to be involved unless there is traffic obstruction, an injury or damage to property other than the car (though not just bumping a fence).

 

42 minutes ago, kiwik said:

Well if you have 4 adults sharing a house you are likely to have 4 cars.  Very few places have off street parking for 4.

The point is to make this not happen. The city can't really regulate how many adults per house, so the cars act as a proxy.

We lived in a town with no off-street parking that was near a bunch of colleges. I think a big reason they had the rule was to keep grad students and post-docs out.