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3 minutes ago, Valley Girl said:

 

You're probably right.

Though I think the innocent party would be totally within his or her rights to rip both the journal writer and both snoopers a new one (to put it not-so-delicately).

The innocent party got it straight with the writer that the journal of lies was a bad idea.  Writer agrees and regrets.  However, innocent party feels the greater wrong was to the snoopers.

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5 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

The innocent party got it straight with the writer that the journal of lies was a bad idea.  Writer agrees and regrets.  However, innocent party feels the greater wrong was to the snoopers.

And I agree.   I personally don't care if the journal was left out.   There is a virtue called self control that should have been exercised by the snooper.  (You might notice that I feel rather strongly about this.)

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Depends on what the journalist intends to do with the work. Because a novelist also writes a bunch of fiction, and that’s a career. A work in progress may use real names of people who inspire a character, to be later replaced with a different name before making a story public. So the wrongness of the writer’s actions is debatable.

The snooper is definitely in the wrong if it is an invasion of a minor’s personal journal, unless that reader is a parent/guardian *AND* the young person is in actual (not imagined) danger and/or at risk of self-harm and/or has possible intent to harm others (ie, if i suspect with good reason my kid is suicidal or the next school shooter, I am definitely reading that journal). But just being the parent to a well adjusted kid with a need to vent on paper doesn’t give you privilege to browse, imo.

To be clear, I feel a bit differently about a journal/diary and the text communications of a young teen just learning to navigate the world of electronic communications. So y’all might think me a hypocrite in that respect, but I call it monitoring a learning curve. 

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20 minutes ago, Jean in Newcastle said:

And I agree.   I personally don't care if the journal was left out.   There is a virtue called self control that should have been exercised by the snooper.  (You might notice that I feel rather strongly about this.)

 

Well my daughter and my friend found my journals from high school and college.  They spent half the night reading them.  Didn't know till the next day when they showed me what I wrote about my husband.  I was fine with it.  I mean, if I don't want them read then I need to burn them.  It is the whole reason I kept them, so my children and grandchildren would know what it was like when I was growing up.   My daughter hasn't left her journal out, but has left out notes and things and yes, I read her texts sometimes.  But we had a rather big incident a year ago.  I don't check as often as I did back then.  

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5 hours ago, Scarlett said:

And also the intended snooper isn't the snooper who actually found it.  And read it.  

Interesting we have almost 100% agreement on this.  We should celebrate.

 

Good grief I feel sorry for the writer who apparently can’t trust a lot of people in his/her immediate world. 

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4 hours ago, Scarlett said:

I agree mostly.  I think the writer thought the lies would be found by snooper, snooper would confront writer, writer would say, 'Ha! Caught ya snooping!' and that would be the end of it.  Unfortunately, the journals were found by ANOTHER snooper and the information was passed on to others who then confronted both the writer and the innocent third party (separately) to try to get to the bottom of it.  Think of the lie something like the writer claims to be having an affair with a siblings spouse.  That serious.  

 

In this case the snooper is definitely in the wrong and the one who exacerbated the problem. 

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Snooper.  

I had a friend in high school that kept a diary specifically for her mom to read.  She hid it in not hard to find places.  A lot of the entries said stuff like "spending the night at MaBelle's house" .  Not.

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I think the snooper did more wrong. The journal writer created an effective trap and I have a hard time finding fault with that. 

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4 minutes ago, sassenach said:

I think the snooper did more wrong. The journal writer created an effective trap and I have a hard time finding fault with that. 

Maybe too effective, the lies were believable enough and horrible enough that several people now have read the lies. Who knows how many of them will never quite believe if it is true or not.  

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Am I the only one who is trying to put the pieces together and figure out who these people are?  😁

I really need to get a life.

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1 hour ago, Scarlett said:

Maybe too effective, the lies were believable enough and horrible enough that several people now have read the lies. Who knows how many of them will never quite believe if it is true or not.  

I think this makes the snooper a gossip, too. 

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3 hours ago, Scarlett said:

Maybe too effective, the lies were believable enough and horrible enough that several people now have read the lies. Who knows how many of them will never quite believe if it is true or not.  

 

They snooped then shared with multiple people?! Wow!

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3 hours ago, Scarlett said:

Maybe too effective, the lies were believable enough and horrible enough that several people now have read the lies. Who knows how many of them will never quite believe if it is true or not.  

 

It sounds like the snooper has a lot of amends to make.

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The snooper is in the wrong.

And I feel really sorry for the journal writer who's trying to live with such messed-up dynamics, and was probably raised that way too. I hope they learn about boundaries and can successfully launch and get away from this mess of Crazy.

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