S/o Autism rates increasing and adults never diagnosed

[vmsurbat1]

16 hours ago, Murphy101 said:

What I would love is for the labels to be thrown away and for schools to be set up with the premise that everyone is bleeping screwed up in some way or another and will need some kind of help to navigate academics and society.

Instead we have this donkey butt backwards system of presuming everyone is some mythological normal and the only way anyone gets any help of any kind is if they are far enough off to qualify for a label.  Then they get to add the label to crap they need help with.

THIS ^^^ a 1000 times!

With all the analyzing and labeling, it seems the fact that we are dealing with human beings (and not Diagnoses X, Y, Z) has been lost--the humanity of the person truncated.  Who is this mythical "Normal" person????  Who gets to define "Normal"???? 

I read a memoir not too long ago, young woman growing up in the early 60's (same time frame as me) and as she shared her schooling years, I was amazed that her behavior (high, high energy, needy, large and loud and demanding) was pretty much treated as "Oh, she's got energy to burn" and her wonderful school teacher *let her do just that*--extra playground time was what she needed and got.....  Not a diagnosis with drugs to make sure she sat in her seat like all the other kids.....

I have a son on the spectrum and it is not something we ever let be known widely.  I appreciated knowing that he was, in fact, different (not "abnormal") as it helped me to parent him better.  With love, understanding,  and teaching, he continued to grow and mature like all my other children.  No, not at the same rate, or in the same way, but in his way.  I'm not convinced (in his case, which is the only one I'm talking about) that his "condition" is a handicap.  It is just part of who he is.  This son of mine has opened up the world to me in a quite wonderful way and reflects God in ways that I do not.  Given the freedom to be himself, he has far exceeded what some told us he could accomplish--now at age 27, he is university graduate, gainfully employed, making friends in the way he wants to, enjoying life--just like all my other kids.....

Edited April 15, 2019 by vmsurbat1

[Garga]

A sweet update on my dad.  

So, he has this cancer and realized he had no one who would care. My mother said it was the saddest thing she’d ever heard him say, when he realized there was no one to tell about the cancer that would care.  

So my mom started contacting his 6 siblings and giving them tons of updates (they all live far away).  I just got off the phone with her and she said that his siblings, except for one hermit-type of sibling, have been calling nonstop for the past few weeks to talk to him and see if he is ok. This is after 47 years of virtual silence.  And today, they got news that the hermit one who didn’t want to talk, does now and asked for his number so she could call.

My father’s brother ended his last conversation to my mother with, “Tell John that I love him so much.” 

It made my heart warm that they are expressing so much love and care to him.  

[Garga]

6 hours ago, Medicmom2.0 said:

I’m 37.  I am convinced that today, if I was a child and evaluated, I would be diagnosed on the spectrum.  I don’t want to start talking about my childhood, because it was painful, but if my parents had known about autism and the signs in girls and, most unlikely of all, been willing to get me evaluated, it would/could have been so different.

As it was my quirks and lack of social awareness annoyed them greatly.  Adults were always calling my mom to complain about something I had said or done, things I didn’t understand at all. Almost invariably the situation would turn into physical and verbal abuse because she always just took their word and I didn’t understand enough to explain. I rehearsed conversations ahead of time and often just quoted books or movies, but now I know it came across as mouthy.  I thought I was being friendly or funny. I also was extremely blunt. I remember being maybe 13? And miserable in the kids choir my mom stuck us in.  The choir director asked me what was wrong and I very calmly told her I hated singing, hated choir, and didn’t want to be there.  Long story short she kicked me out and once again I was in trouble and didn’t understand at all. She asked and I answered truthfully.  I could not handle change or transitions at  all, and my parents just thought I was being difficult. I also could not(and still struggle with) knowing when someone was actually my friend.  That still comes into play a lot as an adult and has resulted in some very painful situations.  I don’t read people well and I don’t understand their intentions.

I spent many years wondering what was wrong with me.  The truth, most likely, is that I’m on the spectrum. As are my son, my sister, and probably my dad and two cousins.

I am so glad there’s a lot more education and awareness now.  I don’t really think there is more autism; I think we just describe it better and use the word autism now.  

 

Liking this wasn’t enough. I’ll give you a virtual hug as well.  🦕  and this dinosaur because he’s cool and I couldn’t find the hug emoji.. 

[kbutton]

I found this today and thought it might be relevant to the discussion: https://autismpastor.com/?p=2520   "The Real Reason You Don't Believe I'm Autistic"

[Rosie_0801]

44 minutes ago, kbutton said:

I found this today and thought it might be relevant to the discussion: https://autismpastor.com/?p=2520   "The Real Reason You Don't Believe I'm Autistic"

 

Stereotypes are the first step on the path to understanding.