I need more car advice ASAP

[Janeway]

We had already gone out previously and looked at minivans. We need to be able to fit 5 kids plus us in the minivan. An SUV won't work and sometimes, I drive my dad places so I haul his walker and all his stuff with us. The minivan has the space for it. 

 

The closest minivan to fitting our family size, that truly fits multiple car seats as well as teenagers, is the Honda Odyssey. But, it does not really. You see, I have my 7 yr old, who is small for her age and in a car seat and will be for a while, in a school as well as 17 yr old. I pick them up from a car line. I have my 3 yr old with me and my 9 yr old who home schools and I usually am picking up one other high schooler when there.  IF I install 2 car seats in the middle row of the Odyssey, no one can access the far back seat. No car seat will fit in the middle of the middle row. And frankly, neither will a teenager. The seat belt is tricky and I cannot see trying to expect my 9 yr old to do it daily. It comes down from the ceiling and almost seems as if it might cross over the person in the outboard seat. 

 

I just do not see how the seat configuration would work. If we HAD to make it work, it would involve removing daughter's car seat (hers is a high back booster so would not have to be installed) every time we get in and out with a third child. This would be a ton of work. My husband went with me and saw this and said he cannot see dealing with this. He is thinking it would be better for us to pay the $4000 to repair my current car (power steering and replace rack and pinion assembly and a few other things, I can list them if anyone wants to know the details) and try to make it work another few years while kids are still in car seats. I am thinking he is right. But I really wanted to run it by people here as there are many wise people and I know someone will have something very helpful to say. Thank you so much!!

 

Also..I must add...we already looked at all the other minivans out there. Only thing we did not look at is minivans as old as our current one. Our current one is 2010 Toyota Sienna with 200K miles.

[cjzimmer1]

19 minutes ago, Janeway said:

 

The closest minivan to fitting our family size, that truly fits multiple car seats as well as teenagers, is the Honda Odyssey. But, it does not really. You see, I have my 7 yr old, who is small for her age and in a car seat and will be for a while, in a school as well as 17 yr old. I pick them up from a car line. I have my 3 yr old with me and my 9 yr old who home schools and I usually am picking up one other high schooler when there.  IF I install 2 car seats in the middle row of the Odyssey, no one can access the far back seat. No car seat will fit in the middle of the middle row. And frankly, neither will a teenager. The seat belt is tricky and I cannot see trying to expect my 9 yr old to do it daily. It comes down from the ceiling and almost seems as if it might cross over the person in the outboard seat. 

I just do not see how the seat configuration would work. If we HAD to make it work, it would involve removing daughter's car seat (hers is a high back booster so would not have to be installed) every time we get in and out with a third child. This would be a ton of work. My husband went with me and saw this and said he cannot see dealing with this. He is thinking it would be better for us to pay the $4000 to repair my current car (power steering and replace rack and pinion assembly and a few other things, I can list them if anyone wants to know the details) and try to make it work another few years while kids are still in car seats. I am thinking he is right. But I really wanted to run it by people here as there are many wise people and I know someone will have something very helpful to say. Thank you so much!!

Also..I must add...we already looked at all the other minivans out there. Only thing we did not look at is minivans as old as our current one. Our current one is 2010 Toyota Sienna with 200K miles.

I have a 2014 Honda Odyssey, I know they change things from time to time but usually it is for the better.  I have a Graco Nautilus (not a small seat by any means) and it fits just fine in the middle seat in the middle row.  The two outer seat have to be in the outboard position, the "big" seats have an adjustment to allow them to move closer to the center or closer to the door but in the closer to the door position they can be moved forward and back to access the third row with the car seat installed.  

So put youngest in middle seat, middle row and booster in back row.

I have 6 kids (one who is 6' 3") and have had 3 in car seats/boosters in this van.  You might have to try a different car seat for youngest if your's truly doesn't work but you absolutely can make the Odyssey work with those car seat parameters. 

 

Edit to add: Oh the seat adjustments I'm referring to were added in 2012 so you would be looking at that model year or newer.

Edited March 11, 2019 by cjzimmer1
more information

[Janeway]

1 minute ago, cjzimmer1 said:

I have a 2014 Honda Odyssey, I know they change things from time to time but usually it is for the better.  I have a Graco Nautilus (not a small seat by any means) and it fits just fine in the middle seat in the middle row.  The two outer seat have to be in the outboard position, the "big" seats have an adjustment to allow them to move closer to the center or closer to the door but in the closer to the door position they can be moved forward and back to access the third row with the car seat installed.  

So put youngest in middle seat, middle row and booster in back row.

I have 6 kids (one who is 6' 3") and have had 3 in car seats/boosters in this van.  You might have to try a different car seat for youngest if your's truly doesn't work but you absolutely can make the Odyssey work with those car seat parameters. 

So I was thinking of looking at the one generation old Odyssey...that was the one thing I have not been able to explore yet as none have been in stock at the dealerships where I have been (which might be a good sign). I found one about an hour away so maybe I should make a trip out there.

[school17777]

I’m on my second Odyssey.  Why is the middle seatbelt a problem?  It comes from the ceiling, but once you buckle it in the bottom, it’s just like a regular seatbelt until you undo it, which you probably won’t do on a regular basis.

We recently had all of my adult kids, two adult boyfriends, and our youngest- all fit fine.  The middle seat in the new van is bigger than it was in my 2006.

 

 

Edited March 11, 2019 by school17777

[Lucy the Valiant]

In my Odyssey, the middle seat of the middle row (8th seat / jump seat sort of thing) comes out, rather easily . . . so teenagers definitely can get in, and go to the back row. 

Would that work? 

So you'd arrive at school with 3yo in 5-point (or whatever / big seat) behind you, say, and the 9yo sitting wherever, and you pick up 17yo (who can ride shotgun), 7yo (who could climb to back row in her seat), and another teen, who could sit next to the 3yo. Right? 

 

[Janeway]

1 minute ago, Lucy the Valiant said:

In my Odyssey, the middle seat of the middle row (8th seat / jump seat sort of thing) comes out, rather easily . . . so teenagers definitely can get in, and go to the back row. 

Would that work? 

So you'd arrive at school with 3yo in 5-point (or whatever / big seat) behind you, say, and the 9yo sitting wherever, and you pick up 17yo (who can ride shotgun), 7yo (who could climb to back row in her seat), and another teen, who could sit next to the 3yo. Right? 

 

7 yr old needs help fastening her in to her car seat as does the 3 yr old. So they need to be in the middle.

[Lucy the Valiant]

1 minute ago, Janeway said:

7 yr old needs help fastening her in to her car seat as does the 3 yr old. So they need to be in the middle.

So they could each ride behind a front seat, and you'd still have 4 seats available for 3 kids, right? Even with the middle seat out?

(I drive an older Odyssey with 8 people in it all the time - I love that van!)

[ktgrok]

2 minutes ago, Janeway said:

7 yr old needs help fastening her in to her car seat as does the 3 yr old. So they need to be in the middle.

Would 7 year old agree to use a 5pt seat instead of a booster? It's so much easier to buckle on their own. My 6 yr old is still in a 5pt partly for that reason - he is in the back seat of the van and would need help buckling if I put him in a booster. He can do the 5pt himself. 

[Janeway]

1 minute ago, Ktgrok said:

Would 7 year old agree to use a 5pt seat instead of a booster? It's so much easier to buckle on their own. My 6 yr old is still in a 5pt partly for that reason - he is in the back seat of the van and would need help buckling if I put him in a booster. He can do the 5pt himself. 

She wears a dress or skirt to school so she has gone to a high back booster. 

[EmseB]

My 2012 Odyssey's middle middle seat fits any size carseat in it. We currently own a NextFit and a Pria85 and both fit. My kid in a booster fits. In fact, that's why we picked the 8-passenger Odyssey over the Sienna.

The middle middle seat can be removed or the outboard seats folds down for loading the third row. Or if you only need to hold two in the third row, you can fold the single seat down and let people climb in through the back.

Edited March 11, 2019 by EmseB

[Scarlett]

Is your 17 year old. It going to be driving soon? Because once that happens everything changes.  

Edited March 12, 2019 by Scarlett

[Janeway]

55 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

Is your 17 year old. It going to be driving soon? Because once that happens everything changes.  

No. He has ASD and found learning to drive to be too much for him.

[Storygirl]

6 hours ago, Janeway said:

7 yr old needs help fastening her in to her car seat as does the 3 yr old. So they need to be in the middle.

I have an Odyssey, but I'm tired, so I'm having a hard time picturing your description. So I may be missing details

However, I had four children in car seats at the same time for quite awhile, so I had to have two in the third row and two in the middle row, and we made it work. I think you could make it work to have a car seat or two in the back row. I don't think it's a dealbreaker. I've done it (though I had a Sienna at that time, not the Odyssey).

Now,  when we were in that situation, I did have to stoop and wiggle to the back row to fasten them in, until they were able to do it themselves, and I didn't like it. But I could do it, and I did, for years.

You have older children in the car with you, so why could they not help the younger ones fasten? And the times that they are not in the car, you could help them (which is a pain, but it would not be all of the time).

You could get your current van fixed. But that's a lot of money to put in an old vehicle. I replaced my Sienna when it was approaching 200,000 miles and over ten years old, because I drove my kids around a ton, and I had more confidence in a newer vehicle. I did not want to end up stranded on a highway with four children.

So I vote for replacing the van and figuring out how to make the car seats work.

Edited March 12, 2019 by Storygirl

[Janeway]

9 hours ago, Storygirl said:

I have an Odyssey, but I'm tired, so I'm having a hard time picturing your description. So I may be missing details

However, I had four children in car seats at the same time for quite awhile, so I had to have two in the third row and two in the middle row, and we made it work. I think you could make it work to have a car seat or two in the back row. I don't think it's a dealbreaker. I've done it (though I had a Sienna at that time, not the Odyssey).

Now,  when we were in that situation, I did have to stoop and wiggle to the back row to fasten them in, until they were able to do it themselves, and I didn't like it. But I could do it, and I did, for years.

You have older children in the car with you, so why could they not help the younger ones fasten? And the times that they are not in the car, you could help them (which is a pain, but it would not be all of the time).

You could get your current van fixed. But that's a lot of money to put in an old vehicle. I replaced my Sienna when it was approaching 200,000 miles and over ten years old, because I drove my kids around a ton, and I had more confidence in a newer vehicle. I did not want to end up stranded on a highway with four children.

So I vote for replacing the van and figuring out how to make the car seats work.

My worry was being able to put a car seat in the middle of the middle seats. Two of the car seats must be in the middle row while people can still climb to the back. Right now, 3 yr old is by the door behind driver and 7 yr old is in middle and then when I go through the car line, she gets in her car seat (not needing to climb over 3 yr old) and she can actually fasten her own high back booster in.  In the Odyssey, in the newest version, the way the middle seat is, it seems no car seat would fit in it. But people here have said the outboard seats would scoot out so I could fit the car seat in the middle. Only last question would be, I do not think daughter could fasten her own car seat with the way the seat belt is in the middle of the newest Odyssey. However, I am going to go back to the dealership today and have her see if she could do it and also, maybe drive to a further away dealership and see if an older Odyssey would fit our needs better..have a middle seat that would be easier for her to fasten and such.

 

The younger kids have asked to be in the way back before.  I have a hard time climbing in the back due to smashing my knee a few years ago and having surgery on it. And we only have the older kids with us some times so they would only be able to help when they are with us. It would be difficult to install and re-install the car seats each time we get in and out based on who is going in the car.

Edited March 12, 2019 by Janeway

[Storygirl]

7 minutes ago, Janeway said:

My worry was being able to put a car seat in the middle of the middle seats. Two of the car seats must be in the middle row while people can still climb to the back. Right now, 3 yr old is by the door behind driver and 7 yr old is in middle and then when I go through the car line, she gets in her car seat (not needing to climb over 3 yr old) and she can actually fasten her own high back booster in.  In the Odyssey, in the newest version, the way the middle seat is, it seems no car seat would fit in it. But people here have said the outboard seats would scoot out so I could fit the car seat in the middle. Only last question would be, I do not think daughter could fasten her own car seat with the way the seat belt is in the middle of the newest Odyssey. However, I am going to go back to the dealership today and have her see if she could do it and also, maybe drive to a further away dealership and see if an older Odyssey would fit our needs better..have a middle seat that would be easier for her to fasten and such.

This is where I wonder if you could change things around. Why couldn't the three year old sit in the rear? Then you would have one car seat in the rear and one in the middle.

Or put the seven year old in the high back booster in the rear seat.

Or put them both back there and leave the forward seats for the older kids.

I don't know. Perhaps there are reasons that these configurations won't work. My point is just that you might be able to switch things around more than you think, in order to make it work.

Edited March 12, 2019 by Storygirl

[cjzimmer1]

Agreeing with Storygirl, does 7 year old have to be in the middle row? Does she need help with the seatbelt?  If not put her in the back.  When you pick her up she just scoots the middle row seat forward and hops in the back.  I can see wanting to keep the 3 year old in the middle but you would still have  choices of positions.  Personally I like the youngest in the middle of the middle because then you can get to the back from both sides (and they can't mess with the doors/windows) but it's still pretty to easy to reach them from the outside or up front.  

[mmasc]

I know you said suvs are out, but I’m wondering why. Just out of curiosity. Because it almost seems like an suv with middle row captain chairs could work for you. Your 3 and 7 yo could be in those, 9 yo in back, 17 yo in front, or the back. Other teenager you pick up could be in back too. With captain’s chairs, the back row riders can walk through the middle to access the back and you can still have your two youngest in the middle where you prefer them to be. 

[Suzanne in ABQ]

I would just take out the middle middle jump seat.  It doesn't sound like you need it.  Put both carseats in the two middle seats for 3yo and 7yo. Without the 8th seat in the middle, there is easy access to the back row for the 9yo and occasional teenager.  17yo can sit in front seat, or in the back if dh is with you.  Extra teenager can sit in back.

You could slide the middle passenger seat into the middle position.   This gives easier access to the back row, but wouldn't work if the 3yo and 7yo tend to fuss with each other.  

On the rare occasions that you need that 8th seat, it is easy to install, and you'd need to move the 7yo's carseat to the back, but on those occasions, you will also have a teenager to help him with his seatbelt.  Besides, that seatbelt issue will likely resolve itself before you can blink twice, unless there's a reason you believe he'll never learn to use it?

As for the weird middle seatbelts.  Yes, they come down from the ceiling, and click into the right side, but then you leave that side buckled and it functions like a regular seatbelt, crossing over and buckling on the left.  The only time you need to unbuckle the right side is if you want to stow the seatbelt away, like when you're stowing the rear seats, or when you remove the middle jump seat.

Edited March 12, 2019 by Suzanne in ABQ

[Storygirl]

I agree that if you don't transport eight people on a regular basis, you can just leave the 8th seat out. That's what we do. Then there is no need to fold or move a middle row seat in order to get to the back row.

 

[mamakelly]

Can you put your 7 year old in a low back more compact booster instead of a high back? 

I’d put the 7 year old in a smaller booster in the 3rd row(side seat) with a teen or the 9 year old. 9 year old can help buckle the 7 year old. Put the 3 year old in the middle row. Take the 8th center seat out and store it. Then you have 1 seat in the back row open, one seat in the middle row open plus the passenger seat.

My teens sometimes have to sit in the 3rd row and then either go through the middle (with 8th seat out) or just fold a captains chair forward.